Patricia Ann Goldstein

1960 - 2015

Patricia Ann Goldstein obituary, 1960-2015, El Cajon, CA

Patricia Ann Goldstein

1960 - 2015

Patricia Goldstein Obituary

Published by Legacy Remembers on Sep. 18, 2015.
Patty will be sharing her final resting place with her mother, Jane Ruth Rykerd, who
preceded Patty in death by two years. You will notice that there is Hebrew writing on
the marker. This is because Patty's mom converted to Judaism when in her teens and
married our father, Alvin Goldstein and was a practicing Jew. Judaism as a religion is all
about tradition. There is five thousand plus years of history that is very well
documented.

Most children of Jewish parents who are born in the United States are given both
Hebrew and English names. Patty was no exception. Although Patty did not actively
practice religion, she was a spiritual person.

Patty's Jewish name is Pessy Penina Hinda. Pessy is a Yiddish form of "Batya," which
in Hebrew means "daughter of G-d." According to tradition, Batya was the name
assumed by the daughter of Pharaoh (the one who rescued and raised Moses) after she
converted to Judaism. Pessy was also the name of a child of Patty's grandparents that
died in a fire when just a baby. It is a tradition in Judaism to honor those whose life's
were cut short by giving a later child their name.

The second name, Penina, is Biblical from Hebrew and means Coral, as in the sea
creature. This became "Pearl" in ancient Greek.

The third name, Hinda, is also Yiddish and translated means Deer. The name is often
associated with the biblical Naftali, who is compared to a swift deer in Genesis 49:21). It
is considered to be one of the prettier Yiddish names.

In the Jewish religion, only first names are used, so Patty's Hebrew name is officially:
Penina Bat (means daughter of) Abraham and Ruth, with Abraham being her fathers
Hebrew name and Ruth that of her mother.

In a few months there will be Hebrew inscription on this stone. It will have her name,
the words "beloved sister", the Hebrew calendar birth an death dates and the phrase
"May her soul be bound up in the bond of eternal life."

Patty was born in Minneapolis, Minnesota, but almost immediately the family moved to
California. My father had a heart condition and was told by his doctors to seek a
warmer climate. We arrived here in San Diego in Feb. of 1961, so Patty celebrated her
first birthday here.

She was the baby of the family and we all doted on her. She became the stereotypical
California Girl, with long blond hair and a pert little upturned nose. But since she was
ten years younger than my sister Darlene and me, we did not play with her much as
siblings, but acted more like baby sitters.

So I didn't know much of her inner workings. She did not confide in me. I did take her
to the park to fly kites, we went horseback riding with our mom in Pine Valley, there
were many outings to the zoo and Balboa Park. Our dad passed away in 1969 from
complications of surgery to remove colon cancer. Patty had a strong bond with our
father, but I don't know what impact his death had on her.

At this time I graduated high school and moved out of the house. My mom remarried
and Patty left home too when she turned 18.

Many of you here can pick up her life story from this point. Patty would move to San
Luis Obispo and we did not see each other very often for many years.

During this time in SLO she contracted Hepatitus C. The virus would damage her liver
without her even being aware of it.

Fast forward to 2013. Testing revealed that Patty had liver cancer. We were told that
"her liver was shot" and she would need a liver transplant. Her long time companion,
Larry, had undergone liver transplant surgery and she was his caregiver, so she had a
good idea of what this would mean to her quality of life.

Our mom passed away in September of 2013 at the age of 91. Patty also lost a good
portion of her income as our mom had been giving her money to live on so she could
devote more time to taking care of her as well as being Larry's care provider.

At this point I became more involved with her treatments and we made several trips
together to Kaiser Sunset Hospital in Los Angeles for what is know as TACE
procedures, where they inject chemo directly into the liver. This was very effective in
killing the cancer in her liver, but unfortunately the cancer spread and that knocked her
off of the transplant list. At that point her fate was pretty much sealed, as there is
currently no treatment to fix broken livers. The liver is the filter for the body. If it does
not work properly all systems are affected.

Patty's liver began to fail after the both oral and intravenous chemotherapy was done
about three months ago. The chemo did not affect the cancer. We had genetic testing
done on the cancer cells and UCSD found two drugs that have been effective in slowing
the growth of the tumors, but we had just begun therapy when her liver decided to stop
working.

Larry, her soul mate and longtime companion, became ill during this period and after
two weeks of hospitalization his heart and kidneys failed and he passed away. I believe
the thought of going on without Larry broke her spirit, as in just seven days she was
gone. She died as much from a broken heart as from any disease. I will miss my little
Sis.

I was instructed by my Hebrew speaking friends who translated Patty's name for me to
voice the following phrase at the service: "Kol ha-Olam kulo gesher tzar m'od. V'haikar
lo l'fakhed klal." – which translated means: "The whole world is a very narrow
bridge, and the important part is not to be afraid of anything". May Patty rest in peace.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Sign Patricia Goldstein's Guest Book

Not sure what to say?

October 1, 2015

Darlene Wilkinson posted to the memorial.

September 26, 2015

Cora posted to the memorial.

September 25, 2015

Alan Wilkinson posted to the memorial.

Darlene Wilkinson

October 1, 2015

My sweet sister Patty loved to make me laugh, she was a great listener and always gave me her support. She was in both my wedding and our brother's wedding. Patty came to Michigan in the summers to help us as each of our three sons were born. Patty never wanted to be a bother to anyone and she thought more about others than herself. Our little sister was an excellent caregiver to both Larry and our Mom over the years. She took extra time to do Mom's hair and make her feel beautiful. I will miss Patty's letters and emails where she was "just giving me something cheerful to start my day". I will carry love for and memories of Patty in my heart forever.

Cora

September 26, 2015

Jerry, thank you for writing such a detailed memory of Patty and Jane. I have many vivid and fond memories of everyone in the Goldstein family.

Cora, who lived on your street, born 1965

Evelyn, my mother, still lives in the same house, born 1925

Alan Wilkinson

September 25, 2015

We were fortunate enough to spend a week in San Diego the past few years with Aunt Patty, Uncle Jerry and Grandma Jane. I am so grateful that my daughters, Macy and Emma were able to meet their Aunt and form a relationship. The time spent in El Cajon by the pool or on their patio just sitting and talking are the most precious memories. I will miss her hugs and her laugh.

We had a stray kitten on the back deck last Saturday. She meowed all night and would not leave. As soon as we opened the door, she moved in. It feels like maybe Aunt Patty sent this sweet little kitten to us. Of course my girls were ecstatic to have her. We named her Bella.

We will forever hold Aunt Patty close in our hearts.

Alan, Shelley, Macy and Emma

Mel Birken

September 24, 2015

I will always remember the little blond haired cherub I met when she was just a very little girl , back in 1961 or 62. May her memory be a blessing
Mel Birken

Wendy Bigelow Aston

September 24, 2015

Dear Jerry & Darlene~
Just wanted to let you know I created a Memory Garden at my new home in Patty's honor. It's a rock garden (you know me, I can't grow anything! Just don't have the farmer gene, I guess). I have sprinkled probably 50 pounds of little sparkly squished marbles into the chunks of gravel that make up the garden, and when I look at it, all glittery & bright I think of Patty and you guys. Brenda is helping me to make it really pretty. I'm taking a picture to send you, but it really doesn't show how bright & shiny it looks.

Neil Goldstein

September 24, 2015

My father, Jerry Goldstein, lost his little sister just a few days ago - and I lost my aunt. While I didn't know Aunt Patty as well as I would have liked, when I think on the fact that she's no longer with us, I get a sick, twisting knot in the base of my stomach. And when I think of what it would be like to lose my own little sister, it gets worse.

Patty was always more kind to me than I deserved, and more friendly to me than I knew how to handle. She always smiled when she saw me, sent me countless birthday cards (sorry for not writing back, Aunt Patty!) - and gifted me with a sincere and unrelenting love that I am sad to see gone from our world. I sincerely wish I could have flown back to California to attend her service, or to comfort her in her last days.

But if wishes were horses, as I think my father said, we'd be drowning in horses. (Well, beggars would ride, same thing...) I am grateful that my mother, Mary Beth Goldstein, and my father Jerry were there for Patty, to take care of her and comfort her, and help ease her passing-on.

Rest in peace, Aunt Patty. Thanks for the smiles, the calls, the cards, and, when we got it, the company. I hope you caught up with Larry, so you two can go through those big white gates arm-in-arm.

The angels might make you actually get hitched first, though.
Love you.

Marta Robin Gaughen

September 21, 2015

RIP Patty. Remember her fondly in HS...she had a great sense of humor

Ellen Harris

September 21, 2015

RIP Patty.

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Sign Patricia Goldstein's Guest Book

Not sure what to say?

October 1, 2015

Darlene Wilkinson posted to the memorial.

September 26, 2015

Cora posted to the memorial.

September 25, 2015

Alan Wilkinson posted to the memorial.