Matthew Mills Obituary
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1 Entry
Karen Myers
March 9, 2022
This was my goodbye letter to Matt which (with the help of Shauna Pagano who held the phone up to Matt's ear so that he could hear it) I was able to read to Matt on Monday, January 24th; and again, at Matt's memorial service on Saturday, 3/5/2022. It is offered here for family and friends, some whom were unable to hear it read live. It is difficult for Tim and I to process that someone who was so vibrant and alive is no longer with us. Your roguish grin and boisterous laughter were positively contagious and will always be a part of us. We love and miss you deeply, Matt.
Hey Matt...it's Karen. Sam shared the news with us about you Saturday. I cried for hours and woke up Sunday and cried more. There's just some people you meet in life who you draw strength and hope from in an inexplicable way and those are the people you carry with you inside forever. For me, Matt, you're one of those rare people--despite your hair-raising political views (!). I just love you and I always have. Love is a verb and you never failed to put yours into action. In the early years, I saw your love in action, no less than at least half a dozen times, for your precious grandmother in Connecticut who was needing your help. You didn't abandon her but instead took heroic action to stand up for her and provided everything she needed for her care until, years later, she finally agreed to enter a facility. Next, without a break, it was Mildred who you took under your wing and for years, you were her Angel helping her with everything she needed. More than once, I remember arriving home late from a long day of work to find Mildred waiting in the lobby assuring me that she was just fine--she was waiting for you to help her with a myriad of tasks which you patiently took on--without complaint or delay. I remember our frequent talks as Mildred's mind began failing her and the care that you showed her while trying to help keep her safe. As the only other person she'd allow into her overcrowded unit, you were in a unique position to help her and again, you showed up as her Angel until she too, finally agreed to enter a facility for her care. In 2020, upon COVID's arrival, you flew to Kate's side as her protector when she brought the dreaded virus to our building--one of the county's earliest diagnosed cases on March 2nd from her travels to Somalia. As her Angel, you were her sentry and lookout with all her comings and goings protecting her from cruel comments and harm from those with little minds. I'll never forget you running from drugstore to drugstore to pick up zinc cough drops, rubber globes and hydrogen peroxide for me, items could scarcely be found on the shelf. Next it was Wanda you took under your wing--rescuing her off the floor, getting her medical attention, visiting her in the hospital daily for weeks while her hip mended and then insisting that she not drive by providing her with everything she needed--including transportation to every chemotherapy appointment and then threatening to hire a Trump impersonator to hug her at the door so you could snap a pic and remind her that she obviously secretly loves Trump (!). And, in-between all those instances were phone calls and dozens of texts and a few drop-in visits in our unit (which, btw, Tim and I are buying this month) with lively discussions about politics, the Catholic Church and the Pope. I'll always remember your invaluable help around the start of the pandemic and your amazing offer of help and support with Tim after the ceiling collapsed on us in the hot tub at the Blue Ridge resort on our first trip out in 6 months; your help and reassurance following Ryan's horrible suicide jump at Thanksgiving; setting up your special military issue astral telescope so we could watch the Jupiter and Saturn conjunction in 2020--and instead, observed firsthand, the actual craters on the surface of the moon; the dozens of times you were available to help with the stupid stuff that inevitably accompanies life, like: helping me to exit the building when the electronic door mechanism wasn't operating to let me exit the building (you were just always in the right place at the right time, it seemed); helping our HOA to setup an effective and affordable security system, coming by to examine our mold problem this last fall, supporting me around the initial conversations re moving, hearing your thoughts and admiring your reasoning about the source of the moisture problem in the building; helping me with finding the right duffel pack like yours for Tim's Christmas present; and, your invaluable assistance helping me to unplug my car battery to reset the computer in my car so that I could pass the NC vehicle inspection in November--knowing that without your help, we'd probably still be looking for the location of my Hyundai Ioniq's battery. And, going the extra mile (so like you) taking it upon yourself to research that for us on YouTube and texting me the video so that Tim and I can sound almost as smart as you when we instruct AAA in the future about the Ioniq's battery whereabouts. So, I hope I've built my case around your being an indispensable and irreplaceable friend and neighbor, Matt. And, you did this for everyone--not just for me. I've never know anyone more passionate or mission driven to help others than you, Matt Mills. Life sure throws us some curve balls though, doesn't it, buddy? So, right now sweetie, I just want you to take care of yourself and know that all of us over here will be okay if you need to leave. We're thankful they're keeping you comfortable. I just want you to also be at peace with the knowledge that you did enough. You did way beyond enough...and, we love you for being exactly who you are. Thank you for loving us, Matt. No matter how this rolls out, I know that God is at your side--as are we all.
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