Phyllis Jean Sadd

PHYLLIS JEAN SADD led a long life of ceaseless giving. A model of generosity and hospitality, her greatest gift was of herself. On March 12, she died, aged 92.
Phyllis was born in Charleston to a merchant family from Joub Jannine in now Lebanon. Her parents, Bahia and Nick Haddad, opened a dry goods store in Whitesville where they raised four girls and two boys. She followed her sisters to Marshall College and completed her training as a cytotechnologist, top of the class, in Springfield Hospital in Ohio. The laboratory supervisor implored Phyllis to remain there to work.
Instead she took a position at General Hospital in Charleston, serving all specialties, evaluating tissues, blood and fluids, and administering diagnostic tests. She wryly recounted the three methods of dispatching rabbits to their fatal end to complete the pregnancy tests under her supervision.
Phyllis met the love of her life, Eugene M. Sadd, who whisked her to England to marry while he served as a captain with the U.S. Third Air Force at RAF South Ruislip near London. They began what they would call their greatest joint venture, a family of six children born within eight years. In 1958, they returned to Charleston. Eugene opened his dentistry practice, the first south of the city, while Phyllis managed their household.
They poured everything into their children and reigned over the chaos with gentleness and warmth. As their children grew, Phyllis was both their master and servant. Their family blossomed under her care and attention and evolved in the times, but not of them. Phyllis dragooned the children into self-sufficiency by requiring them to clean and cook. Occasionally, Phyllis would utter obscenities and deploy wooden spoons against enemy forces. She combated the children's disheveled bedrooms by picking up their clothes, shoes and sports gear and tossing them out of windows into the rain. Only by retrieving them could the kids salvage their belongings and their self-reliance.
She would later confess to loving every minute of it, or nearly so. Her children did too. They profoundly loved their parents.
Phyllis was a talented alto who knew how to deliver a song.
She was a devoted life-long member of the Charleston Light Opera Guild. Joining in 1951, she served in every role required to mount musical theatre: actor, singer, sewer, prop master, board member, fundraiser and provocateur. She was unafraid to give her opinions, wanting the best for the organization she loved. In the 1950's, Phyllis was a member of the Guild's esteemed choral ensemble, the Guildaires, which toured the state to high praise.
In the 1960's, she enjoyed a minor career in cabaret in the city's finer downtown clubs. She was known for her repertoire taken from the Great American songbook. One of her accompanists was jazz guitar great, Vince Lewis.
Elsewhere, Phyllis was an enthusiastic creator of modest talents in many things. She pivoted from one interest to another: art, sewing, books, knitting, map-making, French and Italian cooking, tennis, reading, faux painting, and furniture restoration.
After the children grew, Phyllis obtained her B.A. from West Virginia State College. She said she might have become a physician in a different time.
She stood her ground on important issues and lesser ones. She snapped at racist remarks and expressed opinions with conviction.
She encouraged her children's every endeavor in sports, arts, music, education and jobs, even when they were bad at them. She would come to the aid of a struggling teenager with love, compassion and guidance. She would help her extensive family at the drop of a hat.
She invited herself into the lives of many. A brief encounter with a stranger often would turn into a cause celebre. Phyllis thrilled in helping young people pursue their passions and sharpen their talents.
Phyllis cherished many artist friends and celebrated them and their work.
She worked for years in the Manna Meal kitchen on Fridays until she could do it no more. She was a sought-after participant in Read Aloud.
She came to her Catholic faith early and was a 60-year parishioner of Sacred Heart Co-Cathedral.
Gene died in 2018 after years of dementia. Phyllis insisted she would care for him until his last day, or hers. Their eldest son, John, died in 1999 while abroad. His early death marked her in sadness. Near the end, she was eager to join them again.
Gene and Phyllis leave their beloved children: Jeanmarie Passafiume (Paul), Laura Dulman (David), Stephen, Mark and Chris (Karen); their grandchildren, Nicholas Passafiume (Olivia), John Passafiume, Cory Frazier, Annie Dulman, Daniel Passafiume (Catherine), Cameron Frazier (Lexie), Sarah Woodall (Jason), Olivia Willett (Andrew), Michael Dulman and Julie Phillips (Troy); and their great grandchildren: Giuliana, Luca, Marie, James, Colette, Elizabeth, Evelyna, Joseph, Louise and Charles.
In her last two years, Phyllis quietly faced diminishing strength after she contracted Parkinsonism. In these times, Nadia Asaad helped Phyllis with affection and cheer while others, including Latasshia Davenport, supported her tenderly in her final months.
Until a few weeks ago, she worked out three days a week in the gym under the direction of Clinton Shrewsbury and committed to the routine after she was confined to a wheelchair. She almost never missed Sunday Mass.
She persevered without complaint and expressed gratitude for her life. She tried to be fun until she thought she no longer could be.
A Mass of Christian Burial for Phyllis will be celebrated in the Basilica Co-Cathedral of the Sacred Heart in Charleston on March 22 at 11:30 a.m., with the Very Rev. Donald X. Higgs presiding and the Rev. Mr. Michael A. Kawash preaching. Visitation will precede the funeral Mass beginning at 9 a.m., in the Basilica. Burial will be at Mt. Olivet Cemetery.
Phyllis supported many charities and causes. Instead of flowers or food, her family suggests donations to the Charleston Light Opera Guild Endowment Fund or the Sacred Heart Fund for Catechesis and Evangelization.
"Eternal rest grant unto her, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon her. May her soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace."