Robert Reagan Obituary

REAGAN--Robert M., on February 17, 2009. Beloved Husband of Marilyn. Devoted Father of Karen Reagan and Hilda Kauffman. Survived by grandson, Will Gorham, great-granddaughter, Larkin. Born Poughkeepsie, NY, served in the military during WWII, Graduated NYU Law, Appointed Asst. US Attorney, Litigator in NY Courts, retired from NYC Human Resources Administration. Administrative Law Judge. Pro-bono Arbitrator in Night Court. Member American Judges Assn. Past Commander American Legion, Admen's Post 209. Member of Galway Assn. Of New York. Memorial service on Tuesday, March 3rd at All Souls Unitarian Church, 80th and Lexington at 11am. In lieu of flowers, donations to Alzheimer's Research.

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Published by New York Times on Feb. 27, 2009.

Memories and Condolences
for Robert Reagan

2 Entries

Will Gorham

February 27, 2009

To his enormous credit, my grandfather never learned the difference
between kids and grown ups.

As far back as I can remember, he encouraged me to enjoy the giddy pleasures of childhood but also to consider the many serious and
sometimes dark facets of the wider world. For instance, he loved
taking me -- or anyone -- to the circus but he also loved talking to
me -- or anyone -- about politics. For most people, the former is an
activity best enjoyed in the company of children while the latter is
typically reserved for evening conversation with their adult friends.
Not Grandpa. He took me to the circus (and rollerskating, and to the
park where I could slide down the rocks) long after my age surpassed
the average for such activities and wanted my opinions on politics and
current event long before I even knew what the terms even meant.

I recall him one time requesting my opinion about Ed Koch. I think I
was six or seven years old. Needless to say, I didn't have an opinion
about Ed Koch since he wasn't one of the X-Men, but from then on
whenever I heard about Ed Koch (or Mario Cuomo or Ronald Reagan or any
of the other people Grandpa talked to me about), I listened and
learned and eventually formed opinions of my own that I could share. I
remember being proud that I could talk politics with my grandfather
but I also remember realizing with wonder and satisfaction that he
didn't seem to treat me any differently if I had an informed opinion
or was completely ignorant of the topic at hand.

I remember a certain cab ride I took with him and my mom across the
city. Something reminded grandpa of a relatively tame but undeniably
dirty joke and he decided to share it with us all, despite the fact
that I was, by pretty much any measure, too young for such humor. I
remember not getting the joke right away but really appreciating that
Grandpa gave me the opportunity to not get it, that he treated me not
as a kid or as an adult but just as another person. A person that just
might find the joke as funny as he did.

He always treated me this way. As far as I could tell, he treated
everyone this way. He liked sharing the world with people. All parts
of the world. I never saw him condescend to anyone and there was
nothing in life that he couldn't marvel at. Some people consider that
ability to approach the world with wonder to be a "childlike" quality
but I consider it something much greater, thanks to my grandfather. I
hope I never outgrow taking pleasure from life and I hope I can
remember that while adult conversation and accomplishment is
important, so is watching the trapeze artist or the elephant standing
on one leg and saying to yourself or to the person next to you, maybe
for the hundredth time, "wow, isn't that incredible?!"