WENDY PESKY

1941 - 2022

PESKY--Wendy. Our beloved Wendy died on October 24, 2022 in New York. At age 81, she was still young- spirited and full of energy, planning the next family gathering and more adventures with Alan, and continuing to help others through her passion for education, social justice, and the arts. There are women and men, John W. Gardner observed, who make the world better, simply by being the kind of people they are - they have the gift of kindness, courage, loyalty, or integrity. Wendy Pesky was such a person, a gift to all those who knew her or were touched by her grace. The first thing Wendy would want us to tell you about her is the joy she experienced as a mother, wife, grandmother, daughter, sister, and friend. Her quiet strength and warmth shone brightest amongst her family: Alan, her husband of 61 years; Heidi Worcester, her daughter, and Greg Pesky, her son; her son-in-law, Rick Worcester, and daughter-in-law, Naomi Pesky; her grandchildren, Eliza, Hope, and Sam Worcester, Talia and Levi Pesky; and her brothers, Michael, Peter, and Robert Stern. With her son Lee, whom we lost 27 years ago, Wendy is now camping under the stars and making perfect turns on mountains far above us. She was our rock and the light that drew us together. Wendy was born in New York City on January 8, 1941, to Milton and Bernice Stern. Childhood vacations riding horses, pitching hay, and skiing in Vermont gave this city girl a profound love for mountains and wild places. It was there, at the age of 19, that she met Alan, and they were married nine months later. Wendy graduated from Hunter College at 21 with a Bachelor's in education and a baby on the way. After a successful career in the fragrance industry, she parlayed her keen sense of design into The Farmhouse Collection, which she and two friends started together. Wendy's most important venture was the founding with Alan in 1997 of a non-profit dedicated to helping children with learning disabilities - Lee Pesky Learning Center, named in honor of their son who died at the age of 30. Wendy and Alan cultivated a welcoming, collaborative environment where both children and staff feel valued and empowered to learn and grow. And, in her words, "where every child leaves with a little bit of Lee in them." The essence of Wendy is perhaps best conveyed by how she did things - often with humor, always with an open mind. Alan's crazy adventure ideas she usually greeted with, "We are going where??" and then, "Sure, why not!" Alan in 1990: "If I take you to Fiji, will you first go biking and bungee jumping with me in New Zealand?" Wendy: "Sounds like a deal, but you get to do the first bungee jump." Whether biking 600 miles across the Australian Outback, biking from Hanoi to Saigon, trekking the Patagonia circuit, being guests of the American expedition on Everest, or walking the Camino de Santiago - Wendy was game. Their marriage was a remarkable partnership, their life together packed with purpose and cherished roads traveled together. As she wrote to Alan on their 60th anniversary, "You have challenged me to become stronger, bolder, and more open to the unknown. You've always encouraged and been proud of me. You have loved me, and I have loved you? OK, there have been times when I could have thrown you overboard, but I definitely would have tossed you the life preserver." We will miss her wit. Wendy made life more beautiful, a master of the small touches that made people feel special. Her commitment to leaving the world a better place, unheralded and humbly executed, shone through in all aspects of her life. She was on the board of the Sun Valley Museum of Art, The Alliance of Idaho, and, of course, Lee Pesky Learning Center. She and Alan have also been ardent supporters of the Hunger Coalition, Boise State University, Planned Parenthood, the Senior Connection, and Hunter College. You could be fooled by Wendy's understated approach. A few minutes spent in her quiet presence, though, was enough to blow you away. She could be tough when needed, but never harsh. A model of balance, keeping things in perspective even in the worst of times. Alan, speaking of Wendy after the loss of their son Lee: "In the beginning, we took one breath, one step, one hour, one day at a time. Wendy dealt with it quietly, with the poise and calm she brings to nearly everything she does. She is the strongest and most tender person I know." Wendy was a dynamo in all she did, surpassing her husband on the ski slope and golf course. A stealth bomber, Alan says. Early in his career, Wendy plucked a cigar out of his mouth at a dinner party, saying with her lovely smile, "I hate those things," broke it in half, then continued a conversation with the person next to her. Alan loved it. Effortlessly elegant, and beautiful inside and out, Wendy, in the words of a friend, was gracious in a way that's disappearing - a true lady. Soft- spoken and unassuming, she welcomed all to her table, her home, and her heart. A role model for a life well-lived with compassion and grace. Her absence leaves a hole for us that can never be filled. Copper Basin in Idaho was Wendy's special place, her heaven on earth. Early in the mornings, wrapped in a puffy and blankets, Wendy would be curled up on the swing seat with a book and a mug of coffee, waiting for the sun to rise over the peaks and for a glimpse of a moose. She poured her love for Copper Basin and the beautiful times spent there with family and friends into a stunning cookbook, Guess Who's Coming to Dinner, which she created and published four months before she died. She was proud of it, and the book says a great deal about her. Wendy understood what so many of us miss - that a life is defined less by its highlights and low points than by all the small, everyday moments in between. And Wendy was a person who tended to those moments, to the life she shared with the people she loved. Donations in Wendy's memory may be made to Lee Pesky Learning Center. A celebration of life will be held on July 27, 2023, in Ketchum, ID, with further details to be announced