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Kenneth Hayes Obituary

Kenneth Hayes

A distinguished internist in San Jose from 1957 to 1996, died on May 28, 2013, at the Saratoga Retirement Community after a long illness. He was 92. Dr. Hayes was known for his great compassion, patience, astute observation, a wide breadth of medical knowledge, and a deep appreciation for the human condition.


Dr. Hayes was born in Berkeley, California, to Kenneth Aurand Hayes and Margaret Calder Hayes, sister of American artist, Alexander Calder, inventor of the mobile. He graduated from the University of California at Berkeley and attended medical school at the University of Chicago. He completed a residency in Internal Medicine at the University of Colorado Hospital in Denver and an internship at the San Joaquin Valley County Hospital before working as a staff physician at Agnew State Hospital in Alviso, California, in 1957. He had his own medical practice in San Jose from 1958 to 1988, and served as a staff physician at a San Jose outpatient clinic of the Veteran's Administration until 1996.


Dr. Hayes was a long-serving member of the Santa Clara Valley Medical Association's Environmental Health Committee and served for many years as a delegate to the California Medical Association. In 1990, the Santa Clara Valley Medical Association recognized Dr. Hayes for his outstanding contributions to the medical profession. During World War II, Dr. Hayes initially served at a Civilian Public Service camp in Southern California as a conscientious objector. After spending one year at the Civilian Public Service camp, Dr. Hayes transferred to non-combatant service in the medical corps and was stationed in Guam.


In 1974, when his wife Janet Gray Hayes was elected San Jose's first woman mayor, Dr. Hayes supported his wife's political ambitions and career fully, a testament to his self-confidence and progressive outlook. However, while Janet Gray's was a public persona, Kenneth's was a private one. He was a powerfully thoughtful and insightful man who connected best with people on a deeply individual and personal level. But the couple was truly a team. He and Janet Gray enjoyed an amazing 63-year marriage, melding two very distinct and different personalities into a strong and enduring partnership. Together, they worked for decades to improve the quality of life in San Jose. They gave generously to and worked on behalf of numerous environmental, artistic, educational and political causes.


Dr. Hayes was a talented jazz pianist and life-long jazz enthusiast. He was also a lettered athlete during his collegiate and medical school careers and an avid sportsman. While he was still practicing medicine, he typically beat much younger doctors at singles, a phenomenon that few of them have forgotten. After Dr. Hayes retired from active medical practice, he began an illustrious tennis career. He began competing in the 75 to 80 year-old division and continued playing competitive national-level tournament tennis until just two months shy of his 92nd birthday. He and his long-standing doubles partner, Jim Carleton of Redding, California, were consistently ranked by the United States Tennis Association as one of the top doubles teams in the nation. In 2005, their winning record was 18-0 in the Men's 85-90 age-group division. Dr. Hayes was always a gentleman in his competitive play and set up his points like a chess player, regularly ending the point just as he had planned.


He is survived by his wife, Janet Gray Hayes, his daughter, Lindy Hayes of San Jose and her daughters Patsy and Mei Mei, his son John Hayes of Arlington, MA (Rachel) and their son Spencer, his daughter, Katherine Hayes Rodriguez of Truckee, CA (Neil) and their sons, Zeke and Taber, his daughter, Megan Hayes of Laramie, WY (ReeZars) and their children, Levin, Cordelia and Tilden. In lieu of flowers, the family requests that donations be made on behalf of Kenneth Hayes to the Sierra Club, the League to Save Lake Tahoe, he San Jose Museum of Art, Planned Parenthood, or the University of California at Berkeley. His family is planning a memorial service later this summer to celebrate his life.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by San Francisco Chronicle from May 30 to Jun. 2, 2013.

Memories and Condolences
for Kenneth Hayes

Not sure what to say?





Della deCorse

May 24, 2024

No matter how many years pass, your mom and dad will always be in our hearts. What a wonderful adventure our families can share. All three of Jim´s children were honored to be a part of Ken and Janet Grays life. I´m Della, and I was fortunate to spend a lot of time with all four of them. Just wondering, are the iris still blooming? May peace be with you knowing they have lived a good life before moving on.

Della deCorse

May 24, 2023

Hi Tennis Family. It hard to believe 10 years. We are lucky kids, blessed with wonderful parents. Our family is grateful to yours for sharing your father (and mother) in such a wonderful adventure. All of you will remain in our hearts forever.

Della DeCorse

May 24, 2020

Hi from Della deCorse. I frequently think of your mom and dad. This morning it was when I put Nutella on some toast. Last week would have been Jims 100th birthday, and of course I thought of your parents. There are so many values that their generation stood for, and our parents were at the top of that mountain. I am so grateful to have known your Dad, he was a wonderful inspiration, so calm, and so dedicated. May he rest in peace knowing he served the world honorably.

Mia E

June 27, 2013

My deepest condolences to the Hayes family. I did my Physical Therapy Assistant Internship/Clinicals at Saratoga Retirement Community while the Doc was residing there. It was such a pleasure to work with him, and interact with his kind, comical, and uplifting spirit. He was no doubt one of my favorite people there. His willingness to keep moving, and keep on going was very touching to me, and I will never forget him... My prayers go to the Hayes family.

Charles Norcross

June 6, 2013

My condolences to the Hayes family. I too am from his University Of Chicago track team days. I put the shot. Ken
kept a friendly big brother eye on me. I always liked and looked up to him.

Jack Christopher

June 4, 2013

In 2004 I was a neophyte playing on the Northern Cal senior tennis circuit. At Foothills TC in Palo Alto, Ken discovered I was staying at a Motel 6 and immediately invited to stay at his house instead. That evening we discovered we had been on the same track team in 1949 at the University of Chicago, he a javelin thrower and I a pole vaulter. This created a small bond between us and over the next few years I stayed with Ken and Janet Gray several times while playing tournaments in the bay area. Their hospitality is one of my treasured memories. My heart felt thoughts go to Janet Gray and the extended Hayes family.

Herve Le Mansec

June 3, 2013

You will be missed. You were the best neighbor. My thoughts
and condolences go to Janet Gray Hayes.
Hervé Le Mansec
Consul Honoraire de France

May 31, 2013

Dear Hayes Family, I am so sorry to hear of your loss. It was always so wonderful to see Dr. Hayes at Tahoe and even in Chico playing tennis! I remember him as so vibrant and so young at heart. Please know you are in our thoughts and prayers. He will be missed. Much love, Nancy Fregoso and the de Vries family.

Jim Carleton

May 31, 2013

Ken will be greatly missed by all who knew him. He has been Jim Carleton's tennis partner and more importantly friend for close to thirty years. A great respect was formed over those years. Even though their tennis styles differed the results brought seven national championships. Ken always stayed optimistic and was a joy to be around. The two weeks spent in Austria for the Talbert Cup was some of the most enjoyable time spent with Ken and Janet Gray. The Carleton's will always remember Ken

Rita Norton

May 31, 2013

Our condolences and thoughts of comfort to Janet Gray and family.

Lori Sweat

May 31, 2013

To you dear Janet Gray we send our love and prayers on this day. He was an inspiration to all and clearly taught us that we can all play tennis well into our senior years. I'm sure he's showing them all his great shots in the heavens above! Hugs!
Lori and Phil Sweat

Robert Handa

May 31, 2013

My condolences to Janet Gray and entire Hayes family on your loss. A salute to a great man who distinguished himself in so many ways in public and private support of 'individuals' as well as worthy causes

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