Phyllis Gaines

1932 - 2024

Phyllis Gaines
11/13/1932 - 04/07/2024
Phyllis Jean Gaines passed away peacefully the morning of April 7th, 2024, after many years of living with Alzheimer's Disease. She was born in Pueblo, CO on November 13, 1932, to Floyd and Fleta (Irwin) Cadwell, before her family moved to San Diego, CA, when Phyllis was 10 years old.
Phyllis graduated from San Diego State University and later achieved her master's degree in counseling. She is preceded in death by her husband and most faithful supporter, Gordon R. Gaines (Goldstein), who affectionately called her "Punk" for their entire marriage. They eloped in Hawaii, much to their parents' disappointment. But Phyllis and Gordon were independent spirits, carving their own way in the world.
Phyllis, along with Gordon, were long-time residents of Berkeley, CA, where their community was first formed by left-wing politics. But their friendships went beyond politics; they had a wonderful group of friends who supported them through the years, enjoying many passions together from backpacking and riding a bicycle-built-for-two to hiking in the Berkeley Hills. Phyllis loved birds and plants; it was hard to go more than a few steps before she'd stop to smell the flowers and nearly weep at their beauty. She was a yogi for many years, and an amazing cook; in the kitchen she found solace, creativity and healing. She loved art and music, spending hours in museums and attending live jazz and classical performances with friends. She travelled the world with Gordon, and often with his brother and sister-in-law, Marty and Barbara Goldstein. Phyllis loved to read; even when her memory was gone and she'd become non-verbal, she loved books, running her hands over the pages. She was an intellect and an artist herself; exploring painting, weaving (she even made her own dyes and yarn), quilting and sewing.
Phyllis is survived by her two children, Susan Gaines and David Gaines, five grandchildren -- Zachary, Sam, Dominic, Max and Zoe; and six great-grandchildren: Noah, Lily, Nico, Anthony, Rya and Milo.
A private memorial and honorary walk will be followed by a reception May 5th at 3pm at Jones-Harrison Senior Living in Minneapolis, MN.
In lieu of flowers, donations may be made to Jones-Harrison Senior Living, a non-profit dedicated to the lives of elders, where Phyllis was lovingly cared for by the amazing staff for the past six years of her life or to the Alzheimer's Association.