To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.
Pat
July 12, 2025
You and Ed will not be forgotten.
Jaime DeJesus
June 14, 2025
May God bless Edward in His Heavenly Kingdom!!
Dan Ragogna
June 2, 2025
I don't know Col. Ryan or his family personally. I was made aware of his passing via imgr.com, specifically through a post made by a user there, during Pride Month 2025. I'm sad he had to live his life in secret, but elated he had a wonderful partner through it all. To Col. Ryan, thank you for your many services. We will celebrate this Pride and many to come in your honor as well as for the many who cannot celebrate themselves. To his family, it sounds like he was truly loved by you. May you find peace in his passing.
Louis de Wit
May 2, 2025
I´m a Dutch man and although from a country where one by law and general opinion can `come out´ within my country and definitely in most of the world people are judged and persecuted for their love preference. Ed was obviously a courageous man with an enormous sense of responsibility. Yet was rightfully afraid to be scrutinised for nothing. I feel so bad for him and hundreds of millions others in the same position. That´s why we keep fighting with Pride. We must.
Jim
October 21, 2024
Hail to such a courageous man. He has been overwhelmed by people's reactions to his "coming out at death". Such a valient statement and revelation of truth. He has set an example for eternity. He has set a standard for so many human beings. My love to Edward and Paul, together in peace, finally
Randy Skretvedt
October 17, 2024
Blessings to your soul and spirit, Mr. Ryan, and thank you so much for your service in so many ways. God made you as you were supposed to be. (It took me many years to figure that out, but He also blessed me with a wonderful male lifetime partner.) I know God is happy that you and Paul are together again.
Melissa Tucker
October 9, 2024
I do not know this man but certainly have the utmost respect for him, and want to thank him for his service. This is so sad and a rotten commentary on our society that a man who has given so much time to serve and protect others, feels he must live a lie to protect himself and continue to be allowed to protect others. So glad in spite of him feeling he has to live his life as one big lie he found somebody to love and be loved back. So sorry for your loss.
A grateful kid
October 8, 2024
Rest in peace. You share my grandfathers name, I found you because I was curious about where my grandpa went to school. I´m so glad I found you instead. Rest in peace in shining garden where you may eternally be with your love. Thank you so much for your courage, it inspires us all.
Steve Tashik
October 6, 2024
I know the feeling well..
Rest in Peace
Caroline
September 26, 2024
God bless you Ed
Ayvee
August 1, 2024
Colonel Ryan, I cannot imagine how difficult it must be to live a whole life without the opportunity to truly live love in freedom, without fear of hatred or ostracism from others. The loss of your beloved Paul Cavagnaro was surely a low blow, and it pains me greatly to imagine what it must have been like to live that mourning in silence.
Your secret is no longer a secret, Colonel. Wherever you are, I hope you have found the peace you longed for and dance eternally with Paul. If you were born again, you would surely be able to love freely.
SDK
July 31, 2024
I hope your brave obituary encourages others to be brave now - while they are still alive. To everyone still in the closet - we are here for you, we love you, we are waiting for you. We want to celebrate you now, we want to hear your stories now, we want to love you now. Join us.
Christine
July 8, 2024
Rest in peace Colonel. Thank you for the many amazing things you've done for our country. Little did everyone know of the sacrifice you were making the entire time. May you & Paul reunite in peace and love for always. God Bless
Skip Strobel
July 6, 2024
I wrote this letter to the editor. It was published today in The Washington Post. My Dad was a Fireman & did the same thing for his 'brothers' at the firehouse. Uncle Ed sounded like quite a guy. My sympathies to the family. Skip Strobel
KW
June 30, 2024
Thank you for your service and contributions Col. Ryan. I have been moved by your story but also sad that you didn´t get to live out loud your truth. I only hope and pray that you had friends along your way that held your secret close to help you navigate through this world while you were here.
I know that you and the love of your life Paul are together again. You have touched so many of us and hope that your story will continue to inspire others. I only pray I could be half the amazing person you were. May you and your love Paul rest in peace.
Sara
June 29, 2024
I hope you and Paul have found each other in eternity. Thank you for your service and your courage to share your truth.
Lucia
June 29, 2024
My deepest respects to the family. We are so proud of you Ed. May you rest in peace with your love Paul, for all of eternity. Happy pride Sir and thank you for your service!
Donna Lawn
June 29, 2024
Edward, you were and are a hero in so many ways. Rest easy with the love of your life.
Paul
June 29, 2024
My deepest condolences to the family and although he thought it was too late to come out, his message is still an important one. It is a window to the past for some but, unfortunately, still a reality for so many. May he rest in peace.
Elizabeth
June 27, 2024
It is so beautiful that you will be with your love for the rest of eternity. Thank you for your service. Rest easy and fly high.
Marc
June 26, 2024
Rest In Pride, Ed. May you and Paul live happily ever after.
Ranjeet Cheerangie
June 25, 2024
May your hearts soon be filled with wonderful memories of joyful times together as you celebrate a life well lived.
Grey N.
June 25, 2024
I mourn with you all.
My hope for the future is that people will be able to live their truths without scrutiny. For what does freedom mean if we are not free to be our genuine selves?
May Ed and Paul rest in eternal love.
Joy G
June 24, 2024
Sending love and blessings to you and your beloved Paul in the afterlife! Thank you to the family for bringing this story of hope and joy!
A
June 24, 2024
I didn't know you, I only know your story. Thank you for your military and fire services. It's tragic that you had to hide your love. I'm praying you two will be reunited and you find the peace that you didn't receive in this lifetime.
A
Carlton
June 23, 2024
So sorry to hear of Mr Ryans passing. Also so sad to hear that this great gentleman did not feel that he could reveal his gay status .. as you all say over there "Thank you for your service Colonel Ryan" from Myself Carlton and my partner Diane. Sydney Australia.
Steven M.
June 23, 2024
Sir, thank you, your impact will be felt for many years to come. May your story be an example and inspiration for all to make this world a more loving and accepting place. Rest easy, Col. Ryan, I´m sure you and Paul are so happy to finally be together again.
River
June 23, 2024
I did not know Uncle Ed personally, but I have known many such uncles in my life. Thank you for One More Thing. Thank you for your bravery and courage. Rest easy with Paul and know that we love you.
Jeff Truesdell
June 21, 2024
You are serving your community and your country once again with this acknowledgment. I only wish you could see the impact and the response. Rest well.
GP
June 20, 2024
I didn't know him, but I so thank you for sharing "Uncle Ed's" One More Thing. He was brave enough to love, and the world was clearly better for having had him in it. His actions led by example; his dying words should inspire us all to make the world safe for everyone living out loud.
Sincerely,
a fan
Dave in Canada
June 20, 2024
You can now Rest in Peace, Colonel Ryan. You have indeed shown courage by sharing this part of yourself with the world, and there is no need to apologize for the timing of your message. That choice has always been yours, and yours alone. Throughout your life, and once more in death, you have made a truly positive impact in lives of others. Thank you for sharing your personal story with us.
Jo Ann Zornes
June 20, 2024
I did not know you but am now a great admirer. Thank you for your service and your courage...Rest in peace.
Kind
June 20, 2024
This story should go to a Movie producer. With the family´s blessing, Edward´s story would be shared on the big screen so that all of us choose love and honor instead of hatred.
What a powerful teaching story.
We must keep working together so that anyone can live happy and safe.
Nolan
June 20, 2024
You and Paul are reunited. I know your reunion must have been magical to behold. You were so brave for sharing this.
Brook
June 19, 2024
Love is love. I'm so sorry you had to hide.
Alexander Dalgleish-Weaver
June 19, 2024
Col. Ryan, you´ll never now know how much your message meant to me, someone you never met, will never meet. Rest in Peace alongside your beloved Paul, and know that our courage and love shine out in ways you could never imagine.
Kelly
June 19, 2024
Sending love to Edward, Paul, and all family & friends in mourning
Bert Brooks-Moir
June 18, 2024
Thank you for your courage to speak your truth. Sending love to your family. Sending love out into the universe to Paul and to you Edward. Edward Paul
Mason
June 18, 2024
My sincerest condolences to Mr. Ryan, and the people that loved him, such courage for him to have this in his obituary, rest in peace, God LOVES all.
Jeanne Davis
June 18, 2024
That a man so accomplished throughout his long life could not live the full life he deserved is a travesty. I am glad Col. Ryan will now eternally Rest in Peace next to Paul.
Amy
June 18, 2024
You are a hero in so many ways. It breaks my heart that you had to hide anything as righteous as who you loved. Thank you for your service, and for sharing your story at last. I´m sure it lifted you quickly to Paul.
Julie
June 18, 2024
Thank you Mr. Ryan for your courage, decency, and life of love and bravery. You and others like you paved the way for us now to be able to live more freely and safely. I hope you and your Paul are on to your next adventure. May your memories be a blessing to us all.
Giezi
June 18, 2024
Thank you for sharing your story! You are and forever will be loved by the many people whose lives you have impacted, which now includes mine! You and Paul are no longer suffering, are in a better place, and I am sending you both the biggest hug! May you both rest in peace, power, and love! Happy Pride to you both!
Susan
June 18, 2024
Thank you for dedicating your life to your country and community. I hope you and Paul are dancing among the stars.
Millie H
June 18, 2024
Thank you for being so courageous, even in your last step of life. Your story has impacted all of us, even those who were not close to you and did not truly know you in life. Thank you for being so brave as to sharing this and I hope you can now rest easy in this new chapter, alongside Paul. Rest in Pride Edward Ryan.
Vincent Restuccia
June 18, 2024
I life well lived, a distinguished veteran who served his country with great honour, it was a shame that he couldn´t live his life openly with his life long champion, may he rest in peace, Lest We Forget
Jessie
June 18, 2024
I don't know you sir, but you were a very honorable man.. Someone who people would be proud to know and love. I am so sorry you had to love in secret. Rest in peace, reunited with the love of your life.
Daniel
June 18, 2024
American hero, gay, straight, whatever doesn´t not matter . Thank you for your service sir.
Ollie Andersen
June 17, 2024
I have never known nor met you during your life. However, the words you have shared after your passing will stay with me until I pass. I´m sorry you lived in secret due to the abrasive and ignorant nature of people who cannot understand the totality of love. Your words speak volumes to those within our community as well as to the people on the outside looking in. You were a hero in life and you are a hero in death as well. I accept you. I hope you feel loved and validated in ways you were never able to feel during your life, whatever capacity that may be. Thank you for speaking your truth, and may you rest in peace next to your beloved, Paul.
Nallen
June 17, 2024
Dear Mr. Ryan and Family,
Thank you for who you were, for your dedicated service, and for giving incredibly afterlife to medical understanding.
Clearly you, and your family, and friends are strong and we are all the better because of your strength.
Godspeed to all.
Tootsie Whittier
June 17, 2024
Thank you for your service, Colonel Ryan, and you were amongst many fine people who served our country well, and were/are gay. Rest in Peace and Love.
Bill Dodson
June 17, 2024
Thank you for your lifelong commitment to our country and community. What a wonderful person you were.
Carolina Butler
June 17, 2024
Courageous - through and through! Queer people are all around us. Let us be seen, known, and loved. Thank you for your service, Colonel Ryan!
Ann Shepard
June 17, 2024
Rest in Pride Sir.
Whitney
June 17, 2024
RIP, Edward, courage in death is courage nonetheless. I´m certain Paul´s waiting for you on the other side.
Gen
June 17, 2024
Thank you for your service sir and may you coming out really help you rest in peace
Keith Ford
June 17, 2024
Thank you sir for your service in both your military career and your retirement life.
Dave Turner
June 17, 2024
May God bless you and bring you peace.
Peter
June 17, 2024
I've never seen such a powerful eulogy. Thank you for your courage in death, Edward, and I hope you and Paul had a great rendezvous in the great gay beyond <3
Joel Z.
June 17, 2024
May your memory be a blessing to your family and all those you have touched with your message. Your service to this country and this world did not end with your passing. My condolences to your friends and family.
Lindsey
June 17, 2024
You are a true hero! Rest in Peace!
Lanette freeland
June 17, 2024
Thank you for your service and I wish I could have met you, we could have been best friends, you were probably the sweetest person I would have ever met, and now your with the love of your life again RIH Edward Ryan
Lauren M
June 17, 2024
I send my condolences to the family of Mr. Edward Ryan for their loss. This man was a hero for so many.
I never knew Edward, but I wish I had the honor to have met him. He was a part of my community. Happy Pride to Mr Edward and Mr Paul in Heaven. May you rest in peace, forever together.
Tamika
June 17, 2024
What a beautiful opportunity it was serve you sir here at the veterans hospital in Albany
Kind
June 17, 2024
This story should go to a Movie producer. With the family´s blessing, Edward´s story would be shared on the big screen so that all of us choose love and honor instead of hatred.
What a powerful teaching story.
We must keep working together so that anyone can live happy and safe.
Hunt
June 17, 2024
Sir,
You were a hero in life and a hero in passing.
May your memory be a blessing.
Condolences to your family and your extended family.
Maeve
June 17, 2024
I didn't know this man, I'd never heard of him until today, but he was part of my family and my community. Happy Pride Month Mr. Edward, to you and Paul
Beth
June 17, 2024
I did not know you but I wish I had. I would have been proud to be a part of your family or your friend. Thank you for your service to this country. May for forever rest in peace beside your partner.
Mia, 21
June 17, 2024
You were a brave and strong man in many ways with your status and efforts in your lifetime, but the silence you lived your whole life with was probably the most daunting. I´m sorry that weight had to be lifted off of your heart with your passing. Rest in Paradise love.
Shawn
June 17, 2024
I´m saddened that the part of your life (which should have never made you hide in secrecy) was your love for Paul and your natural identity. You have accomplished so many amazing things throughout your life, you will be a forever role model for ALL. Rest in peace dear man and thank you for your service.
Quay
June 16, 2024
Paul is waiting for you with open arms. My heart breaks that y'all had to hide the love you shared. I know you and Paul were welcomed by open arms in heaven, where all God's children are loved, no matter how some on earth might act. May you spend eternity in loving embrace with Paul.
bowie
June 16, 2024
I'm so sorry you were never able to openly live as yourself. I sincerely hope no one else has to come out after death. I wish you love and peace and all the best wherever you have ended up. I hope you can forever be with Paul. You are greatly missed and loved, from both those that knew and didn't know you.
Lola
June 16, 2024
I appreciate you and I'm sorry you had to wait until death to express your feelings. You were loved and I hope you and Paul have met again
Cam
June 16, 2024
Thank you for your service and I'm so sorry that you were not able to live a happy life due to the fear of being rejected by your community. You've left your legacy and forged a path for others to live lives that they are happy in - and I hope that you and Paul are happy together in the next life where you're finally together. Rest in paradise. <3
a fellow queer brother
June 16, 2024
Mr. Edward, thank you for your service. Your story will always stick with me, as a young queer adult. You deserved to be able to live openly, and I´m so sorry the world failed to make it safe for you to do so. I hope other queer people feel the way I do after reading this; feel that we must keep working hard to make sure nobody has to keep their identity secret their whole life.
Thank you to Mr. Edward´s family for respecting his wishes to share his identity, many other families wouldn´t have done the same.
May Edward and Paul be up in the sky, free to love openly, painting the sky with colors of love and pride, dancing in the clouds.
Emma Conard
June 16, 2024
May this brave and commendable veteran find eternal peace with the love of his life
Margaret
June 16, 2024
Your message is deeply moving. I hope reading it will encourage many others to open their hearts to all our brothers and sisters.
Tim M.
June 16, 2024
The military service that you and all men, women, and non-binary like you provided to America allowed and allows the LGBTQ community to live in a society and proudly, discretely, or however the heck wanted, live its truth-while at the same time forsaking yours. Blessings that you found love and companionship, and may you rest in eternal peace knowing the world knows who you truly were and what you represented-the best of men, the most normal and basic of human beings. May the military catch up to your deathbed enlightenment-in spirit. In deed, it´s already been forced to. Godspeed.
Nancy Rose
June 16, 2024
Sir: I am so sorry that for your lifetime your family, friends, co-workers etc. have made it so that you were afraid to live your true life. Fly high with your love and know that we all should be able to be our true selves.
Damon Craig Wells
June 16, 2024
Thank you sir. Rest easy.
Libby
June 16, 2024
Thank you, Col. Ryan, for the bravery you showed through-out your life. Rest easy, sir.
Peter
June 16, 2024
May your memory be a blessing.
NYT Reader in Florida
June 16, 2024
Sending much love and admiration to a man who sacrificed for his country & municipality, and who now gave such a powerful voice to the LGBTQ community at large.
Thank you.
K Fuhr
June 16, 2024
My condolences to you and your family. One doesn´t chose who to love. The opportunity to have kind of love is rare and everyone needs that kind of love be it gay or straight it doesn´t matter it is still love
Nate Mears
June 16, 2024
Big love to you and yours and your sweetheart.
Jess
June 16, 2024
Edward - your story and your partnership with Paul has clearly touched so many people, myself included. Thank you for your willingness to still give and receive love in the ways you were safe to do at the time - and thank you for sharing it with all of us now. Rest in peace.
An unknown woman
June 16, 2024
I did not know Edward but I must say I admire him for coming out. May you rest in peace
Nick
June 16, 2024
To the family and friends left behind, my deepest sympathies. To Col. Ryan, thank you for bravery in sharing your authentic self. It is never too late. I am so glad you had 25 years with the love of your life Paul. I am thankful that even though you could not share your whole self publicly, that you at least did privately with someone you loved.
I'll be a friend when we meet
June 16, 2024
I hope that you are now with Paul after 30 years of being unable to grieve his loss publicly or with you family, may you two rejoice in being one for eternity. I am sorry that humanity has failed you, Paul, and so many others. Thank you for coming out in your goodbye; Your final statement to the world serves as a powerful message. If someone so strong and brave as yourself could not muster the courage to be openly gay in this world, then we as a collective are failing each other monstrously. Even the bravest and strongest of us all need much more kindness in the world, that balance would strengthen us all.
I wish peace and joy for you and Paul in your eternal journeys, and I hope your love is lighting up the sky.
Thank you for your dedicated service, and thank Paul for standing by you until his mortal end.
Ryan AZ.
June 16, 2024
Your memory shall forever live with each and every Queer person who has come across your story. I am deeply sorry the world is so awful that you had to hide yourself from it, praying your family does better by other members to make everyone feel safe enough to live as their true selves. May you rest in peace and love Mr. Edward Ryan and Mr. Paul Cavagnaro.
Mary
June 16, 2024
Thank you for your service Edward. I'm so sorry you didn't feel like you could openly be yourself. I'm glad you had so many years with Paul, and if there is an afterlife, I'm happy you're with him again. This queer woman sends you all her love.
To the family: May you have the time and space to grieve, mourn, and celebrate this incredible man, especially since his story has gone viral.) And thank you for honoring his wishes and sharing this with us all. You had the option to censor this and you didn't. Thank you.
"No one's ever gone forever,
When they die they go away,
But they will visit you occasionally,
Do not be afraid.
No one's ever gone forever,
They are caught inside your heart,
And if you garden them and water them,
They make you who you are." - Amanda Palmer, "Lost"
T
June 16, 2024
May you experience the freedom and love you once gave up. May you rest in peace and may we honor you by living in our full queer glory...
Jane
June 16, 2024
Sir, I think of you and all others who served under DADT every single day. I have never taken it for granted for a second of my own military service that I can do so as an out lesbian. I recently encountered a 20 year old airman who had never heard of DADT and was puzzled by the concept. It was bittersweet. It's a blessing that this generation can't even imagine those horrors but at the same time I never want you to be forgotten. Thank you for your service.
Ryan Yates
June 16, 2024
Thank you for your service and dedication. You were an hero and inspiration in life and continue to be so in death. May you RIP Mr. Ryan
Linda
June 15, 2024
Thank you for your service to our country. Rest in peace with your beloved.
Eric
June 15, 2024
May you rest in peace and pride. May you be reunited with your true love Paul, where you can finally get your happily ever after.
Tim White
June 15, 2024
And What a splash you made this pride month... I shared this on my Facebook page as you shared the same obituary column as my uncle. My eyes welled up reading it, but your story needed to be shared. And now it has been shared all over the country. I am proud of you. You needed to hear that.
It is unfortunate that it took dying to be/show/share your true authentic self. May you rest in peace.
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