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Lionel Killian
July 1, 2025
Well honey today is the day that I dred every year because I have to remember the worst day of my life. I didn't sleep at last night because it was in the middle of the night when God called you home. I know that God doesn't make mistakes but knowing that still doesn't confront me when I am missing you. I kinda checked out for a few months suffering from depression but you knew my true feelings. I really don't know what to write sometimes because we shared so much together and many of our memories are just for you and I. I just want you to know that the love we shared will never change. I still have your picture on my phone for my home number. I hope that I don't sound silly but I just miss your smile your warm embrace and all the love you had for everyone as well as me. There is place for me where you are resting so we'll be together again someday l love you Mook Mook
Carol H. Howard
January 21, 2025
Hi Sis :0) (smiley Face?)
I know you are, in Heaven, with NO pain or sorrow!
Yet, I still wanted to know when your body is resting and I verified that you are in the National Cemetary, Jacksonville, Florida, Section 9, Marker 1482, just in case I come that way. I LOVE You Always!!
Carol H. Howard
July 12, 2024
Dearest Sweet Sister, it seems like yesterday that you went to Heaven and I Miss you so Very Much! Victoria spent 2 weeks with me and ask almost every day, Where is Nana? I tell her to look up to the sky, Nana is in Heaven with Jesus and she, seem to have her answer. When she is here, I try to take her to see her Godmother, Ms. Clara. Ms. Clara said that she looks good and the people at her house is taking Good Care of her and they are! Litte Mickey was suppose to come to spend some time with me this summer; but there was a change of plans. Me and Angie, his aunt on his father's side take turns spending time with Mickey. Robin, you would just Love him so Much!! He is doing so good in school and is such a Cute, Charming, Sweet little boy! He is 7 years old now! Times flies when you are getting old! Cheryl and I were talking about you this week and she has just Great Memories of You, me too! The Jesus Christ show reminds us that as long as your Dearly departed stays in your heart/memory they Live in You! Lionel is doing well, and he sent me a picture of the Beautiful Red Roses, he placed on you resting place; they look so Pretty! Victoria loves to watch the DVD, Ray Charles, Celebrates, A Gospel Christmas and there is a lady that sing a Lovely solo, that reminds me of You! I am getting Sad and I don't want of cry, because I Miss You and Love You so, so, so, Much!!
Carol H Howard
September 16, 2023
Happy Birthday Sister XOXOXO
I miss you all the time and I am not sure it is getting better? But, maybe, because I do not feel like I am not Bleeding anymore.
Did I tell you how the Good Lord Blessed me? I was missing you so Bad I could have Died a Thousand Times over and He gave me a Dream about You!! I do not normally dream, and this was a Wonderful Dream, and we will be together again when it is my turn. In the meantime, I am still teaching at the college and have plans to open a Toy Museum for the children here in my community. There is so little here to do for the little ones, and this is my plan (if the Good Lord is Willing?). I Love you so, so Very Much and Miss You More!!
Lionel B Killian
September 16, 2023
Happy birthday my love this only one of the many happy moments we spent together celebrating the happy times in Our Lives I miss you and always love you because you remain a part of me happy birthday honey life is hard without you I love you
Carol
July 2, 2023
Sweet , Darling, Sister;
Has it been 10 years since the Good Lord took you Home!
It seems like yesterday to me, I Miss you All the Time!! You, Grandmommy and Uncle all together in Heaven and I miss you All!! I will see you All Again when it is my turn! I just took Victoria back to her house. She was with me for 3 weeks and she would ask, "Were is Nana?" and I would say look up to Heaven, she is there with King Jesus, watching you!! It seems to give her Peace to know that. I talk about you to my class. I tell them I had/have the Sweetest, Kindest, Friendliest Sister, that never met a stranger!! I tell them we would go to the store for a 10 minute trip and an hour later, I am still waiting for you, while you spoke to Everyone in the store!! I used to get so annoyed and now, I would pull up a chair and just sit there and watch you!! I tell them, do Not Take the Ones you Love for granted!! I Love You, So, So Very Much!! XOXOX
Lionel B Killian
September 18, 2022
Hi baby , you know that I would never forget your birthday. I am still in the hospital because of a problem with a biopsy. Nicki and others all acknowledged your birthday Friday. I miss sharing this special day with your , making plans and hiding presents. I always laugh when I look at the picture we took together and we had not been dating a month yet I think but you saw a much longer lasting future for us together. We lost Loyd a few weeks ago and I feel like I lost my best friend I miss you mook mook and love you so much . I will bring you favorite flowers as soon as I am discharged
Carol H Howard
September 16, 2022
Happy Birthday Sister!! This has been a tough week as your birthday week, it is a mixture of Happiness that you were born on this day and Sadness that you are not with me to celebrate like I would Love too. Yet, God in his Goodness has given me Peace!
I was so sad that Evita and the family moved to Georgia and now I am so Very Happy they moved!! The girls are so Beautiful, Smart and Strong! God has given them Favor and they are Blooming Like Flowers!! Little Mickey is not so little anymore! He is getting so Tall, Handsome and Smart! He is so Loved by his father, who just Adores him and I feel so Very Blessed to have such an Amazing Son In Law!
Karen came to visit me and I just Loved her being here!! I wish she would have stayed. She is such a Wonderful Daughter to Mom! She wants to make sure that Mom is taken care of and not alone, what a Lovely Sister we have! You and her are so much alike! You both are so Caring and Loving and May the Good Lord continue to Bless Karen with Great Favor!
I Miss and Love You so Very Much and I am so Thankful for the life we had together! I was watching the Color Purple and the scene were Celie reads the letter from Nettie that she is caring for her children, A Family; reminded me so much of how you were there for Billy, Evita and Victoria, when I was not. It was because of your Love as a Sister and Aunt, that I was able to accomplish so much in my Life and Thank the Good Lord for the time He gave Us!! I am the Curator of Your Life and I share you with students and strangers and it brings a Smile to them as you did in Life!
Michael
July 14, 2022
Hi Mom, I was thinking of you today. I hope that you know I love and miss you. Your time was cut to short. In truth I regret the time we did not have together. But in my heart I know we will be together again, and in paradise have the the time and love we both need.
Lionel Killian
July 1, 2022
I miss you mook mook . You will always be the Love of my Life . I look at your picture every day , not that I need to because you're etched in my heart . Love you always Baby
Carol H Howard
September 16, 2021
Happy Birthday Sis!! Your Loving Husband gave you such a Beautiful Birthday message!
I will learn how to do more with my pictures. The last one was a clipart that reminded me of You!!
It has been challenging these last few weeks, but God is Always so Good to me!!
I have period of Sadness, Missing you All the time and I Love You Soooooooooooo Very Much!!
Lionel Killian
September 16, 2021
Happy Birthday to my beautiful wife companion and best friend. I miss you today just as much as the first day God called you home. I miss your laughter and smiles that brightened not only my day but everyone you came into contact with. I often think the first time I saw you . Your beauty captured my heart where it remains forever. I love you Mook Mook. Thank you for blessing me with your unconditional love and support. When they wrote when a man findth a wife he finds a good thing must have been thinking of you because you are and remain the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you and Happy Day to the love of my life . Although God has called you home I will not allow this day to be sad because I think how blessed I am to have 20 yrs of life and loving you. Happy Birthday again my Love
Carol H Howard
August 29, 2021
l Miss and Love you Always!! You were the Kindest, Sweetest Person I have ever been Blessed with and a Really Good Sister!!
Victoria asks, where is Nana? I tell her to Look to Heaven, Nana is with the Good Lord Jesus, Yea!!
Carol H Howard
July 1, 2021
My Dearest Darling Sister, they say that time Heals Hurts and Sorrow; yet, the Good Lord Knows that it does hurts less, knowing you are in his Arms and Your Head lies on His Chest and He Holds You so Close!!
To me, it is just yesterday that you Graduated to Your Heavenly Home and I Miss You All the time
My life has been Challenging and the Good Lord is Changing me, Yea!! Karen and I talk almost Everyday and it makes me soooo Happy She is as Kind and Loving as You and I am in AWE at the Wonderful people you Are!!
She will be coming to California to see me and Victoria and I hope and Pray she will Enjoy her trip! I know what to do!! KiYa graduated from High School and I went to Georgia for the graduation. She looks so Beautiful and is such a Lovely Young Lady!! I am so Very Proud of Her!! Little Mickey was suppose to come for the summer, yet, there was a change of plan and I am hoping maybe next summer. You would just be so in Love with Him He is just a Joy!! Victoria is coming to stay with me for the 4th of July weekend and Angie has invited us for a barbecue, Yea!! She ask where in Nana and I say she is with Jesus
I Love You Always and Miss You Always
Lionel Killian
June 30, 2021
Tomorrow marks the date that my life changed forever. You were my best friend , biggest supporter, and wife . You were and still remain the love of my life which never can be substituted by any else. I miss you mook mook and your remain ever on my heart . Love you and miss you Baby. I know weI will see each other again
Carol Howard
March 31, 2021
A Piece of My Heart Lives in Heaven!
My Loving Sister
Carol Howard
September 16, 2019
You were Born on this day Sister and I miss you everyday. I was telling my class about you. I told them about how we would go to the store for one thing and 2 hours later, we are still in the store while you are talking to EVERYONE!!
I use to complain about that and Now I would pull up a chair and just watch YOUâ¤
Lionel and I were telling stories and laughing at how you always Made a Friend .
I Love YOU ALWAYS
My Queen
Lionel Killian
September 16, 2019
Happy Birthday Mook Mook. I love you
Everyday that God give me breath spend upon this Earth I continue to miss you I remember all the good times and the not-so-good times that we spent together but no matter how times were we shared a love like no other it's amazing how I can look at pictures of you and see something different every time but pictures will never satisfy the need I have to hold you in my arms again I find myself spending more time by myself because only you understood things about me I often think about how often used to tell me how you like to see me in my uniform and I never used to wear it after I retired but now I dress in full uniform to visit you and sing your favorite song God I miss you so very much how do you finish a puzzle when the most important piece is missing how do you continue to live when the primary reason for living it's gone so I only exist and I don't think I'm doing that very well but for you I continue to try because I know that is what you would want me to do I truly thank God for Carol because she has no idea how much it means when we talk and share our memories of you
Love You, Always!!
Carol Howard
July 14, 2019
I Miss You so Very, Very Much! Yet, I know that you are so Safe and Happy in the Father's House. I am trying to live my Life so that we can be Happy together again! Where there is No Sadness or Tears!
Victoria asked again today, as she does every Sunday. Where is Nana? I tell her to look up to Heaven, she is with the Lord Jesus and remember; she said she is watching you, so be Good :o)
Hugs and Kisses, My Loving Sister and BFF!
Loving you Always
Carol Howard
January 8, 2019
Hi Sister;
It is January 8, 2019, and I was missing you really bad yesterday and today. Yet, the Good Lord always reminds me that you are in His Loving Arms and I am better.
Victoria spent the holidays with me and she ask about You, Every Sunday as we are driving to church or to get something to eat. "Where is Nana"? I tell her that you are with Jesus and watching her, so she better be Good!!
Your Sons are doing Good and spending time with Mom. Mom said that Robert is a Wonderful cook. She and Karen spent Thanksgiving and Christmas with him and his Family, Yea!!
I Love and Miss you all the time!! I am so Very Happy you were able to be Happy at Fort Leavenworth. I look at our pictures together and you do look so Happy.
I am getting Sad and have to go now. I will Love you Always, May Darling, Sweet, Kind Sister!
Carol Howard
September 17, 2018
On your Birthday, I went to see Victoria. Every Sunday she asks; where is Nana? I tell her to look up and remember, Nana said is is watching you; so you better be Good!
Every Sunday she asks about you!
Evita is so sad you did not get to meet Little Micheal, but when he gets older; he will see your picture and ask about you. I will tell him that you were the Nicest Person I ever knew. How you would go into a store and want to talk to everyone you meet and how it use to get on my nerves. Now, I would pull up a chair and just watch you and there would be no rush, just as long as I could watch you and that Smile that Lit up a Room!!
Robert is in New York with his family and it is good that Mom gets to see them.
Micheal is in another season of life and this will pass too.
I am still fighting battles and look forward to spending time with Little Micheal. Robin, he is the Prettiest baby I have ever seen, but of course I am partial. He has one dimple and has the cutest smile in the World!! He is doing this baby run that is kind of, I am going to try not to fall, with my pamper full. He is so smart! He loves books, he lays on his rug and just looks at the pictures, he is so Cute!! I brought a baby signing book with a DVD and he watches it all the time and will sign hat, ball, car and bubbles. I have been trying to find more and I will. He loves being outside and is helping me water the plants now.
I do try to keep in touch with Lionel, I need to do better and I promise, I will. I am hoping he comes to California soon. I know he and Micheal will be just Great together!
Evita really has a Good Husband and family and I am so Very Thankful to the Lord for them!
God is so Amazing, just as you went home to be with Jesus, he sent Little Micheal and the pain of missing you is now Bearable :o(
I don't know why is seems as if you have only been gone a little while and how it still isn't better, but it is, if that makes sense.
I know now what it is to miss someone you Love so Very Much. I did not understand that feeling before, but I do now.
What I can say is that the Good Lord give me 15 years extra to Love you and I am thankful; that you have Peace and No more pain. For you to stay would have been so selfish of me, because it would have been more about me than you, But God, who is Good, Loving and Wise, had you in His Arms :o)
I Love you Sister and as Long as I Live, You will Live in Me!!
The Day You were Born was the Most Wonderful Day of my Life!
Carol Howard
September 16, 2017
Dearest Beautiful Sister of Mine, today is the day, the Good Lord Blessed you to enter into your Very Special Day, Your Birthday!
I will take Victoria to church tomorrow and she always asks, where is Nana? I always tell her to look up, Nana is with Jesus and she seems at peace.
Evita is not sure what I will do sometimes when I am thinking of you and sometimes my sadness overwhelms her, yet, she is not a coward and does not run away. She just sits there looking at me and I know she is praying for me.
She wishes you could be here to see Little Micheal. Oh Robin, he is such a Beautiful baby, his eyes shine, he has a dimple and really pretty lips. He looks like such an Angel and he makes missing you not so very miserable! My heart breaks every time I think of you and it seems like you only left me yesterday. Yet, the Lord reminds me that you are with him and I will see you again and I feel better. Thank you Jesus!!
I sent Lionel a text and I have not heard from him yet, but that had a bad storm in Florida and I pray they are alright. I plan on calling his Mother today.
I told Evita, that I am so proud of her, she is doing such a Great job with the kids, Glory to God!! KiYa is in the High School band, Yea and loving it. All the girls are doing Great in school and are such Good Big Sisters to their little brother.
I am teaching again and loving it, it keeps me busy. Mom and Karen are doing good. Karen is spending alot of time with her friend Micheal and she seems Happy. I like him for being so good to her and I hope, I will get to meet him one day.
I Love you so Very Much and Miss you Every Day :o(
September 18, 2016
Happy belated birthday MOM
I miss you
Carol Howard
September 16, 2016
Happy Birthday, Sister!
The day you were born was the Very Best Gift I received in my life. I miss you all the time, but I know that you are with the Lord Jesus Christ. That gives me great comfort, to know that I will see you again!!
Evita's is having a baby boy and he is getting bigger and bigger and she cannot wait to tell him stories about her Wonderful Aunt!! She says that every time she thinks of you, she remembers funny and happy times with you. When I think of you, I know that I had the most loving person that God ever created in my life and I was Truly Blessed!!
Love you so Very Much, My Darling, Beautiful Sister!!
July 3, 2016
You are with me
Carol Howard
July 1, 2016
Robin, I just Love Diana, she is so very Loyal and she called me today, to say how much she misses you! I do too, my Dear Sweet Sister, it seems like you only left me yesterday and my Life has changed so much. Yet, I give Glory and Thanks to God for the time he gave us together. I miss you, My Very Best Friend and Sister!! You never realize how much one person can make your life so Rich, until they are gone. I Love You!!
Diana Trottman
July 1, 2016
To my Mother in law Robin today is the day where you left us 3 years ago to go to heaven I miss you and I am always thinking of you I wish heaven had a phone I miss talking to you I just wanna let you know you loved and missed every day I love you and I will never forget you
âĽâĽâĽ We miss you and love you âĽâĽâĽ
January 25, 2016
Diana Trotman
January 25, 2016
Hello Robin I think of you often I miss talking to you I listen to the song what was played at your funeral Marvin Sapp - The Best In Me with tears in my eyes please watch over my Grandbaby he is in heaven with you I know you both watching over all of us I love you always...Your Daughter in law Diana XOXO
Carol Howard
December 31, 2015
Dearest Sister, I miss you so much and it was a Christmas that you were missed!! I will always Miss you, but Praise God, it is not an Open Bleeding Wound anymore.
I know you are with the Angels!! I Love and Miss you so Very, Very Much!!
September 24, 2015
Hello beautiful Happy belated birthday I miss you and am thinking of you.
Carol Howard
September 22, 2015
Happy Belated Birthday Sister :0)
I had Victoria with me during your Birthday. It makes it easier, when she is here. Evita came over and we called Lionel and he was with his mother. I never realized how much I would miss you, yet, God is so Good and I am reminded that he give the gift of an additional 15 years of time spent together with you!!! I had the Blessing, of having you as my Sister and I will always be Grateful!!!
Carol Howard
July 14, 2015
I Love and Miss you My Loving Sister!! It would have been so painful this month had not Victoria been with me the entire week. Yet, when she left the crying began, but not for long. The Lord Jesus reminded me that you are with him and no longer in pain. I have been reaching out to Lionel, I know how much you loved him and I Love him too. He has your voice still on the answering machine and I love to hear your sweet voice!!. I thought it was only a year that you been gone, Evita reminded me that it has been 2 years :0(
I am trying to live a life that when I go to be with the Father, I will hug and kiss you again. I never realized how much I would miss you!!! I Love you so much, Sister!!
Carol Howard
March 23, 2015
Hi Sis, Evita got married on March 7, 2015, on her B-Day. She was so happy and I was happy for her. Her husband Micheal is such a nice guy, you would like him. The wedding was beautiful, all the kids were in the wedding and Victoria too. Victoria did Great and looked so pretty. Micheal's father and I gave Evita away, and she looked beautiful. I have known Micheal Mother for years, tell me that was not a GOD thing!!! Your Light was with Us and I Miss you so Very Much!!I Love You!! I love Diana's poem to you, she is so Cool!
We Love and Miss you
Diana Trottman
February 12, 2015
Diana Trottman
February 12, 2015
Do not stand at my grave and weep
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the diamond glints on snow,
I am the sun on ripened grain,
I am the gentle autumn rain.
When you awaken in the morning's hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there; I did not die....
We love you and Miss you
Carol Howard
December 22, 2014
Merry Christmas and a Very Happy New Year!! I love you Sister so Very Much, I did not know how much I would miss your smile and hearing your voice :0(
Carol Howard
December 22, 2014
Merry Christmas My Lovely Sister, I miss you so very much and tried as hard as I could to send holiday greetings to your McDonald Family and the tears started to flow. I miss you everyday and I know I will see you again in Heaven. Victoria is asking about you more and I told her that you are watching her from Heaven and you want her to be Very Good!! I spoke to Michael,Robert and Diana and they are doing Good. Evita is getting married, Kiya is on the honor roll and NaKisa and Alana are getting prettier, bigger, smarter and stronger. Hugs and Kisses
Evita Wright
September 29, 2014
Hi auntie
I miss you dearly....i miss talking to you i miss calling you i miss your laugh....i wish I would have taken more time to see you....but I hope you know how much I love you. ...you live in heart for always
Diana Trottman
September 27, 2014
Just wanted to let you know...You're in my thoughts all the time...I wish I could call you and talk to you I miss you...Always and forever your daughter in law Diana ?
Carol Howard
September 17, 2014
Celebrated your life today with Pastor Dickerson. You would have liked her. We saw the movie, The Game Stands Tall. Boy, did i cry missing you. I Love & Miss you all the time!
Carol Howard
September 3, 2014
Hi Sister :o) I know to be absent in the body is to be present with the Lord. I just miss you all the time and I had the first Dream about you a couple of weeks ago and you seemed happy. You were talking and I just kept asking you when are you going to visit me? Your Birthday is coming soon and I plan on celebrating your life. I miss you all the time!!!!
Michael & Family Trottman
May 12, 2014
~Thinking of you~
evita wright
March 14, 2014
hey auntie missing you like crazy... i never though that i wouldnt be able to talk with you. i hate that i took that for granted...i do know your watching over me...i just wish sometimes you talk to me...i miss you so much...
Diana Trottman
March 12, 2014
We thought of you today,
But that is nothing new.
We thought about you yesterday,
And days before that too.
We think of you in silence,
We often speak your name.
Now all we have are memories,
And your picture in this frame.
Your memory is our keepsake,
With which we'll never part.
God has you in his keeping,
We have you in our heart...Thinking of you with love
your
Daughter-In-Law Diana & Family
Diana & Family Trottman
January 4, 2014
Those we Love remain with us,
for Love itself lives on.
Cherished memories never fade,
because a loved one is gone.
Those we Love can never be,
more than a thought apart.
For as long as there is a memory,
they'll live on in our heart.
Diana and family Trottman
January 4, 2014
((HUGS))
Carol Howard
November 29, 2013
Hi Sis, this is the first Thanksgiving without you &l miss you so much! Victoria is spending the holiday with me & she has been Wonderful! We went to Ms. Clara's, Reggie's & Ms. Sara's & they loved her. GOD is so very good! I called Lionel & he called back. We also called Mrs. Killian. Aunt Beverly was missing you too. I love & miss you so much :-(
Carol Howard
November 11, 2013
Hi Sis
Victoria's B-Day was celebrated yesterday. It was the 1st one without you :-( The Blessing was that Ms. Clara & Maria went with me & we talked about you! I am so happy, they got the chance to meet you, before GOD, took you home. I miss you Sis. PS, Grandma, changed her mind. She is still getting blood, Praise God!
Carol Howard
October 27, 2013
Hi Sis, mom said that Grandma does not want anymore blood transfusions. She is ready to be with you. I will pray for God's will. Love you
Carol Howard
September 16, 2013
How do I celebrate your Birthday without you? GOD always has a plan. Maria came to my job to spend the day, thinking you! You said you really liked her, when you met her last year. I really like you daughter in laws. They really love your sons & were very kind to your sister in her grief. My God Bless them. I can talk/cry to Evita about you & she lets me. I miss you so much, it hurts! I am so thankful for my Lord & Savior, Jesus Christ! While he is holding you, he is holding me too! I love you, my sweet, sweet sister!
Michael Trottman
September 16, 2013
Happy birthday mother I love you and will always celebrate the day that you graced the world. No matter what has happened in life with out you there would be no me or my family. You are forever in my heart. I love you
Diana Trottman
September 16, 2013
May the angels hold you close and sing you a Happy Birthday song and I'll be sending wishes to you today and all year long...Happy Birthday Robin we love and miss you...((HUGS))
Evita Wright
September 16, 2013
Happy Birthday Aunt Robin....man I miss you so much. I love you, and I will celebrate you everyday of my life! You've taught me to appreciate people and things. I pray for you everyday and I pray that your smiling on me that your proud of me. I love you Nanna
Evita Wright
September 9, 2013
hey aunt robin,
it's hard not having you here, but I know you are at peace and happy. I just miss you so much. I love you, I miss you and im always thinking of you.
look over me and the girls! :)
Diana Trottman
August 20, 2013
If roses grow in heaven,
Lord please pick a bunch for me,
Place them in my Mother-In-Law arms
and tell her they're from me...
R.I.P Robin
carol Howard
August 16, 2013
I miss you so much, my sweet sister!
carol howard
August 16, 2013
I miss you so much, my sweet sister!
July 7, 2013
Robin, Beth and myself, Donna will miss a wonderful neighbor and friend who helped save my foot when I stepped on glass moving in next door, and continued to generously share her time and talents especially at McDonalds and I do not think I will see one without remembering her. Robin also helped my daughter Beth by listening and caring about her as if she was her own, We will always miss you.
Donna and Beth Bourland
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