Mary Lucile Born

1931 - 2023

Mary Lucile Born (née Rhees)
May 16, 1931 - January 11, 2023

Tacoma, Washington - Mary Lou Born, dedicated educator, librarian, musician and writer, passed away on January 11th at the age of 91. She leaves a legacy of gratitude and her hope for a world where kindness and acceptance prevail.

Born in Boise, Mary Lou grew up surrounded by music, art and literature, spending many happy moments with her parents, R. Stanley and Doris Rhees, and brother, Stan. She graduated from Boise High School and went on to attend Scripps College, earning a Bachelor of Arts in the Humanities in 1953. In her junior year, the first signs of Multiple Sclerosis emerged, changing the course of her life. Despite progressive weakness that affected her ability to walk, Mary Lou persevered, undergoing intensive physical therapy and pivoting from her first love of modern dance into performing ballads and folk songs using special lap-held instruments, offering a new way to fulfill her dreams of bringing the joy of music to others.

It was at the Pacific School of Religion, during her graduate studies in Religious Education, that she met Arie Louis Born, a Dutch composer, pianist and theologian, who had recently immigrated to the United States. During this time, with Louis by her side, Mary Lou gradually regained strength in her legs, a remarkable remission in the severity of her MS. They married in 1959, becoming partners in faith, music and life.

The couple first lived in Burns, Oregon where they welcomed three children - Victoria, Marijke and John. In 1968, the Borns moved to Tacoma, where their home became a haven for the children's friends, who were free to visit day or night. Balancing life in this busy, unconventional (and yes, chaotic at times!) household, the family often spent their summers relaxing at Payette Lake in McCall, Idaho.

Both Mary Lou and Louis served as teachers in private schools, while also pursuing advanced educational degrees at Pacific Lutheran University, Central Washington State University, and the University of Puget Sound. While Louis had ministerial posts with both the Episcopal and Presbyterian churches, Mary Lou held various positions within the fields of adult vocational and correctional education. They also collaborated on many inspirational songs (Louis composing the music and Mary Lou writing the lyrics), including three decades of annual Christmas carols.

Later in life, the couple enjoyed 7 wonderful years in Alaska, with Louis becoming minister of the Craig Presbyterian Church, and Mary Lou appointed as City Librarian, introducing her popular "Aristotle the Book Worm" program. They were embraced by the entire island community, and were honored to learn from Tlingit and Haida tribal leaders who shared their culture and wisdom with them.

Just a few years after returning to Tacoma, Louis passed away, but Mary Lou continued to live in the North End neighborhood she so loved during her retirement years. Zephyrus, her dear cat companion, was with her for 19 of those years. In 2018, she moved to The Weatherly Inn - a warm senior community with kind, caring staff and residents.

Mary Lou's life was characterized by generosity and gratitude. She cherished the gift of being a mother and grandmother, adoring the next generation, Lincoln and Danny, and her many "granddogs" and "grandcats". She also thought often of her relatives and dear friends across the country and in Europe. Quick to express pride in her family, she was always supportive of their interests, aspirations and choices. Because of her physical limitations, she was profoundly grateful to the many healthcare professionals who provided wonderful care over the years, voicing her appreciation even in difficult times.

Mary Lou delighted in her social time, sharing her easy laughter, even at her own expense; her witty poetry to celebrate birthdays and holidays; and invitations to join in her few indulgences (a sweet tooth and occasional adult beverage). She will be remembered with love and fondness as the kind and friendly spirit that she was.

A private memorial is planned in Boise later this year. In lieu of flowers, her family requests that a donation be made to the National Multiple Sclerosis Society or your local library.