William Farnum Eastman

1932 - 2022

William Farnum Eastman

Chapel Hill, NC — William Farnum Eastman died on May 12, 2022, at Carol Woods Retirement Community in Chapel Hill, NC, from complications of stroke and pneumonia.

Bill was born on September 25, 1932, in Dover, NH, the younger son of Bernice L. Munn and Edson F. Eastman. His mother was a high school English teacher, and his father was a dairy cow expert who taught at the University of New Hampshire, managed large dairy farms, and eventually owned creameries in Hillsboro and Concord, NH (the latter being Eastman's Dairy). Bill loved animals, especially the ponies and the ever-present family dogs and cats. He loved eating ice cream, delivering milk, delighting in the snow, and playing baseball in the pastures with his dad and older brother Paul.

A 1950 graduate of Concord High School, Bill was class president his sophomore and junior years and student council president his senior year. He lettered in three sports, co-captained his basketball and baseball teams, was a member of the National Honor Society, and a representative to Boys' State. In his senior year, his classmates and teachers awarded him the American Legion Medal for courage, honor, leadership, patriotism, scholarship and service. He attended Phillips Exeter Academy for a post-graduate year and lettered in basketball and baseball.

In 1955, Bill earned a B.S. in physical education from Rutgers University. During his college years, he was a resident hall advisor, chairman of the chapel ushers, sports editor and business manager of the Scarlet Letter yearbook, and President of Chi Psi fraternity. He was also elected to the Scarlet Key and the Cap and Skull Honor Societies. He made money delivering four daily newspapers, but he spent most of his time earning five athletic letters in basketball and baseball. The summers after his junior and senior years, he played semiprofessional baseball in college leagues in Canada and Maine.

After college, Bill attended Yale Divinity School (class of '59). He served a 14-month internship in pastoral care at Baptist Hospitals in Winston-Salem, NC. In May 1958, he met Judith Ann Northen of Richmond, VA, also a pastoral care intern. They married four months later and spent the next 64 years devoted to each other. He often referred to Judith with deep gratitude as his life-changing spiritual mentor. They welcomed two girls: Kimberly Ann, born in 1962, and Karen Leta in 1965. Borrowing the words of his inspirational teacher Gloria Karpinski, Bill wrote in a draft of his own obituary that he "was deeply grateful for the privilege of being their dad, for the joy of being their friend and for the grace of sharing their path."

Bill was ordained by the United Church of Christ in 1959, but never served as a minister. Instead, he went back to school and in 1964 was awarded an Ed.D. in marriage counseling from the University of Pennsylvania. While pursuing his doctoral degree, he was a staff member at Marriage Council of Philadelphia, an Assistant Instructor in the University of Pennsylvania School of Education and an Instructor in Family Study in Psychiatry in the University of Pennsylvania School of Medicine. He was also an intake worker with the Philadelphia Child Welfare Department for a year. From 1963 to 1966 Bill was on staff at the Children's Aid and Family Service Society of Baltimore County, Maryland. And in 1966, he earned his third degree after college, a Master's in Social Work (M.S.W.) from the University of Maryland School of Social Work.

The Eastmans moved to Chapel Hill in June of 1966 and from then until 1976 Bill was the first marriage counselor on staff in the Student Health Service at the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill. He was also an Assistant Clinical Professor of Marriage Counseling in the Department of Psychiatry in the UNC-CH School of Medicine.

From 1976 until Halloween 2005, when they moved into Carol Woods Retirement Community, Bill and Judith shared a private practice of psychotherapy called Eastman Services, Inc. He remained active in professional organizations during these years. He was a Fellow and Supervisor of the American Association for Marriage and Family Therapy and served on the Board of Directors, and on the Admissions, Supervision, Training and Standards, and Long-Range Planning Committees. He was twice elected president of the North Carolina Association for Marriage and Family Therapy, and in 2000 was presented their Pioneer Award, 'for making significant contributions to the establishment and/or development of the profession of marriage and family therapy with long-term impact." He dedicated this award to Judith by remarking that "just like Fred Astaire said of Ginger Rogers, she danced every step with me, just backwards and in high heels."

Bill chaired the Counseling Section of the National Council on Family Relations and served as a board member of the North Carolina Family Life Council. He and Judith were certified leader couples and served as chair couple of the Training and Certification Committee of the Association of Couples for Marriage Enrichment. They were also certified instructors in the Minnesota Couples Communication Program. He was a licensed marriage and family therapist and licensed clinical social worker.

Bill was fun. He had a joyful, playful disposition and deeply enjoyed the fullness of life with his family and friends. Many family gatherings were enjoyed at Emerald Isle and Smith Mountain Lake. He loved jokes, pranks and neighborhood parties. He laughed with his whole body before he could tell you what was so funny. He prearranged for his body to be donated to the UNC Chapel Hill School of Medicine for the training and education of a future health care provider "after he was finished with it."

He greatly enjoyed playing tennis, snow skiing, sailing, and cheering for the Tar Heels, particularly in basketball and baseball. He cheered most vigorously for any activity involving his children and grandchildren. He and Judith loved to travel internationally with dear friends and family to beautiful places, many with spiritual significance. He supported environmental and justice causes, felt a real connection to Native Americans, and had a soft spot in his heart for the blind and physically challenged. Bill was deeply spiritual; he believed in the sacredness and interrelatedness of all elements, creatures, and people; in the concept of All Is One; in reincarnation; in the journey and growth of our souls in love and service as the purpose of human life; in the total, non-judgmental love from God; in the unique revelations and influence from each person's loving guides; and in the sacred contracts of each person's life. He was committed to a life of soul growth, discipleship, service, non-judgment, justice, affirming love, striving to live one's own truth, and sharing the gifts one came to give.

Active in Binkley Church since 1966, Bill served as a deacon, Sunday school teacher, and member of the pastoral search and personnel relations committees. He was the volunteer minister of visitation for five years before he left that role to be more available to Judith, who was living with dementia. His patient, kind, encouraging and loving devotion to her, especially in the last chapter of their life together, was inspirational. Through handwritten notes, voicemails, and conversations, Bill had a remarkable way of affirming others so that they felt special, seen, and understood. He delighted in reaching out to others for holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries of all kinds.

Surviving Bill are his wife, Judith Northen Eastman; two daughters and two sons-through-love, Kimberly Eastman Zirkle (Franklin Zirkle) of Chapel Hill, NC, and Karen Leta Eastman (Gregory Dohi) of Valley Village, CA; four grandsons and two granddaughters-through-love: Chandler Zirkle (Grace Sullivan Zirkle) of Chapel Hill, Hartford Zirkle (fiancée Hattie Ferguson), of Raleigh, NC, and Julian and Jordan "Jordy" Dohi of Valley Village, CA. He is also survived by a handful of cousins, many nephews and nieces, and numerous friends. He was preceded in death by his parents and by his brother Paul. The family expresses its deep appreciation and gratitude to the communities of Binkley Church and Carol Woods and to all others who befriended and supported Bill and his family throughout his entire life.

Memorial gifts may be made to Binkley Church at 1712 Willow Drive, Chapel Hill NC 27514 and earmarked "Bill Eastman/Pastoral Care Fund." In honor of him, you may also choose to enjoy some ice cream, send a card or make a phone call to affirm someone you love. The Memorial Service for William Eastman can be viewed at https://tinyurl.com/yhhxmayx