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Thomas O'Connor Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Thomas O'Connor
Mark Boyle
December 12, 2008
Mr. O'Connor was one of those teachers you would tell others about when you left WHS. An acerbic wit and a true desire to put the success of his students before following the rules made him what he was.
He helped get me into to college with a recommendation that he told me I should go read if I was ever having a bad day. Today, I am halfway through my doctorate in music - in part, thanks to this man. Rest in peace,
Tara McMillen
November 14, 2008
Mr. O'Connor was a wonderful man. He kept classes interesting and fun. He went out of his way to read and critique plays and stories I'd written and always encouraged me to follow my dreams. I regret that I did not stay in touch with him, but will always remember him and appreciate the self-esteem boosts he gave me. I love you Mr. O'Connor and will always remember your lessons!
Alex Trujillo
November 13, 2008
I just found out about this great loss to all who knew Mr. O'Conner. After reading all the enteries what more can be said. He touched all our lives in one way or another. My thoughts are with his family.
Geoff Pinney
November 10, 2008
My sincere condolences go out to the O'Connor family. I was fortunate enough to have had Mr. O'Connor as both an English teacher and a track and cross-country coach more than 20 years ago at Wethersfield High School. I was shocked and saddened when I heard the news because I knew that an original had left us.
Mr. O'Connor has influenced my life in many ways. I have actually followed in his footsteps somewhat. I am a high school English teacher who also has advised the newspaper. I try to challenge my students to think outside of the box and to question authority. I use humor as a teaching tool and I try to be inspirational. That being said, Mr. O'Connor is unimitatable. To me, he will always be Coach. I cannot express how much I enjoyed running for him. He instilled a passion for the sport that has taken me through college cross-country, two marathons, and actually was the activity where I met my wife. For that, I owe him a great deal.
When I was informed of the news of Mr. O'Connor's passing, I immediately took my yearbook off the shelf and read what Mr. O'Connor had signed for me. He said that "no finer young man has ever walked through my classroom." I certainly don't feel as if I am even close to fulfilling that statement, but Mr. O'Connor was famous for saying things like that. He was always complimenting his runners and students. He taught us to believe in ourselves. We in turn, wanted to give our best for coach. Not only was he or teacher and coach, but he was our friend. He was definitely one of the "cool adults" who understood.
Words cannot truly do justice to sum up Mr. O'Connor and the place he holds in my heart as well as all of those who he has touched. May peace and comfort bless his family and may all of us carry on that rebel spirit that Coach O'Connor touched us with. The world is a better place having had Coach O'Connor in it!
Geoff Pinney (Tustin, CA) Class of '88
Lisa Leombruni (2000)
November 6, 2008
Mr. O'Connor will always be one of the great influences in my life. He introduced me to so many new ideas and unique perspectives of the world, and cared about every student's personal growth. I will always have fond memories of time on the track, long Sunday runs discussing Joyce, and his unpredictable, energetic, and exciting classes. I cannot thank him enough for what he has added to my life and he will most definitely be missed!
brian jones
November 6, 2008
tom was a fun person to know and be with and it saddens me to know the world has lost an amazingly witty man and friend. although our paths went differently over the years some thought of him always came to mind when i needed a smile.he will always be a part of my thoughts and most unique memories.
Meredith Phillips
October 19, 2008
No one pushed me harder to write well or fanned a flame for literature like he did. Mr. O'Connor will be well-remembered by many. The Phillips sisters (Beth and Meredith) send heartfelt condolences to the O'Connor family.
Dan McCarthy
October 19, 2008
After reading all the entries here, I wonder if Mr. O'Connor ever realized there are people all over the country who were influenced by him in some way. I just wish I paid attention in his class more.
Ryan Hollander '91
October 15, 2008
Tom O'Connor was my friend and advisor through many high school activities. The Outdoor Club, Boy Scouts, Track and Field and Indoor Track. At the time I was enchanted with my first living, breathing adult rebel. His contrarian ways were exciting and inspiring. Now, I see instead all the hours and hours he spent giving of himself to the kids. Field trips to go camping or rock climbing. Endless days of after-school coaching. Weekends on the bus to track meets out of town. After-school chats and counseling. It is stunning to calculate the amount of time Tom gave to others. Tom lit up WHS with his educational electricity and his challenges to authority. But don't let the leather jacket distract you, his real mission was giving everything he had to his students. Thanks, Tom.
Maria Rodriguez
October 14, 2008
I want his family members to know that I was very fortunately to interact with Mr. Thomas O'Connor, his pleasant personately always attrack my attention.
Mr. O'Connor will be missed and my heart will go out to the ones that he has left behind since he is a big lost.
Maria Rodriguez, from CMG the Division of Rheumatology
Minoy A
October 14, 2008
I still cant believe he is gone..He was a wonderful person, always making me laugh..lots of energy, always happy..He will definetly be missed..My heartfelt condolences to his family... MINOY A. CMG Rheumatology
Marc Orfitelli
October 13, 2008
To those of us who were fortunate to have had him as a teacher, can you not picture his voice clearly in your head when you read the words "ehh...Mr/Mrs (fill in your last name)....."..even 20 years later? You will be missed for your passion and love for teaching Mr. O'Connor. My condolonces to his family.
Erica (Leavy) Silloway
October 13, 2008
I just heard the sad news and I wanted to add my heartfelt condolences to the family. I had Mr. O'Connor for 2 classes at WHS, and loved his unorthodox sense of humor! He was a blessing to his students and will be missed.
The Wescott Family
October 10, 2008
Unfortunately, we did not know Tom O'Connor. However, having read the condolences here it is clear that he was a most wonderful person who inspired many; what a gift to others and legacy to leave to this world. Our hearts go out to Michael and the O'Connor family. May the lasting words of others expressed here and the precious memories each of you hold dear comfort you in the days to come. With our heartfelt sympathy and prayers we wish you peace in your hearts.
Paula W
October 10, 2008
Mr. O'Connor,
What can I say except thank you for being the best teacher I had at Wethersfield High School!! Your style of teaching was so outside the box, which caught my attention as well as many others. You made learning the finer points of literature and writing fun. Thanks for being you! I cherish the great memories!
Your presence around the town will be missed. Rock on!
Paula W "88"
Luanne Parker-Matos
October 9, 2008
I am so saddened to hear of the passing of Tom O'Connor. As a teacher and newspaper advisor, he taught us so many invaluable lessons. It was as a person, however, that he was most influential. His energy and passion and irreverance were thrilling in sleepy Sombertown, USA; he inspired many of us to think outside of the (proverbial) box. I will always remember him sitting cross-legged on his desk, eating an onion bagel and stirring his coffee with a pen as he railed against some ridiculous rule or authority figure, or telling stories about his son, whom he adored. (this was before Meg!) My favorite was how he'd cradle Michael between his legs, like a boat, saying, "We're going to Cuba to see Fidel" in order to annoy his in-laws! It is because of him that I became an English teacher who mutters "I'm hungry" every time Hamlet is discussed (Danish--get it?), who writes "K.I.S.S." on the board (Keep It Simple, Stupid!), and--most importantly--who chants the mantra "the key word in 'deadline' is 'dead'." Here's to you, Mr. O'Connor. The world is a bleaker place without you. --Luanne Parker-Matos, WHS '86.
Paul Woodworth
October 9, 2008
As a coach, Tom was a master at inspiring and praising me and my teammates, all while invoking Shakespeare. I will remember Tom O'Connor for his caustic wit, touched humor, raspy theatrics and for sticking up for me when I screwed up. My condolences to all who were close to him.
Carey (Sullivan) French
October 9, 2008
I was shocked to hear of Tom's passing. I was fortunate enough to have Tom as my English teacher during my senior year at WHS. I can vividly recall many of those classes, as Tom would pace around the room and share his passion and excitement with us...that passion extended far beyond the pages of the text. He shared tales of his many adventures with us and cared about what was going on in our lives and in the world around us. He often spoke of his son in class. He introduced me to Socrates, T.S. Eliot and unraveled the mysteries of Faulkner. Those of us who had Tom as a teacher and/or coach are truly lucky. If there is any consolation, we carry a bit of Tom's sparkle in us. I know that he inspired me, as did Mrs. Doyle and Mr. Hersey, to major in English in college, and most recently pursue a degree to teach high school English.
My thoughts and prayers are with the O'Connor family.
Christy Zaliznock-Buehler
October 9, 2008
I will never see, read, or hear Hamlet quite the same after being a part of Mr. Oconnors AP English class. He was an intergral part of my High School experience and will be missed.
Marlys Hersey
October 9, 2008
Tom O'Connor had a profound influence on me. He was a funny, vital, renegade spirit. When i was in highs school in the early to mid '80's, he was yearbook advisor, newspaper advisor, track coach - and I was on yearbook and newspaper staff. He took me and a few others to NYC twice, to the Columbia U. journalism conference and suggested by implication "See what you could do?" He took me around the Lower East Side of NYC - my first time ever - and to dinner at some little hole in the wall Asian restaurant, with some of the best food ever, another first for me. He showed us how to navigate the NYC subway system. He told lots of stories and loved hearing ours. I started jokingly calling him "Tom" at school, and so from then on he referred to me as "Ms. Hersey," in that gravel-y voice of his, with a twinkle in his eye. He turned me on to Herman Hesse's writings, amongst many others. He would give us credit on a test if we had a wrong answer but were creative enough to make him laugh. There were a lot of truly great teachers at Wethersfeld High, I realize now, and he was one of the best. He was more than just a teacher to many of us, he was a friend. He was strict and very demanding in his courses, yet he also treated us as near equals, with respect and genuine interest, and joy. I have told many friends about him in the past 20+ years. I am sorry I didn't tell him what he meant to me, but I think he knew. My heart goes out to you, his family. As recalcitrant and angry as I know he often was, know that he also moved so many of us; so many of us are much more alive and engaged in the world -- and more amused -- than would have been without having known Tom. I hope Tom is at peace.
Love, Marlys (formerly Ashley)
Sheela Agarwal
October 8, 2008
When I think about people who have shaped my life, Mr. O'Connor is on that very short list. As a teacher, he challenged us to think and to challenge even him. He was never a do as I say not as I do kind of man. He made his own rules when the rules set by the establishment were stale (like our famous multiple choice tests). He treated his students with respect and in return he earned our respect.
After high school, I was lucky enough to stay in contact with Mr. O'Connor - he came to my college graduation party and most recently we began emailing. The loss I feel is difficult to articulate and yet it is very deep.
To Kathy, Michael & Meg - I am deeply saddened by your loss. I wish that I could make it to the funeral. I wish that I could do or say something that could take your pain away.
Joyce Mauro
October 8, 2008
I feel blessed to have crossed paths with Tom O'Connor. He was a fantastic coach and inspiration to me as I trained for my first marathon. I learned so much about running and life from him. I will think of him fondly as I lace up my sneakers and hit the road.
Ann C
October 8, 2008
A man with so much heart, soul & passion for guiding many which crossed his path. Even 20 years later the memories & laughs remain alive & vivid when I was among the staff at WHS.
Audrey Aloi
October 8, 2008
Tom,
You were more equal than righteous preacher. Thanks for making room for me in your Journalism class and convincing “AUTHORITY” I didn’t need Chemistry to graduate. My life would have taken a different direction without your guidance; I ended up majoring in Journalism. I owe you. Your energy, passion and motorcycle jacket will live on in my memory. Thanks for teaching me the importance of a good lead. I’ll never forget the day you read Kafka’s lead sentence in the Metamorphosis aloud in class. I’ll remember the way you treated all of us like human beings and not just as marks in your grade book. Hey, did you even use a grade book? No? I wonder what authority had to say about that! You were a good man, Tom.
Audrey Aloi
WHS '95
Tammy
October 8, 2008
My thoughts and prayers go to Mr O'conners Family..Mr O'conner was a good teacher He will be missed by everybody...
Lindsay Class of 2000
October 8, 2008
Mr. O'conner was an awsome guy. His class was the only class I liked going to. He was a great role model. We will always remember
Mr. O'Conner!! R.I.P.
Sue Bengtson
October 8, 2008
Mr. O'Connor was such a great teacher, mentor and friend. He was always there to listen and give advice, no matter what the situation. He will be missed and always remembered.
My thoughts and prayers go out to Tom's family and friends.
Sue Hemmann
October 8, 2008
My thoughts and Prayers are with with the O'Connor family. Mr. O'Connor was one of my favorite teachers of all time.. He will be missed
Kirsten Abell
October 8, 2008
Thank you Mr O'Connor for being one of the best teachers I ever had. I will always remember you and the impact you made on my life during high school! Kirsten '97'
Bobby Rooney
October 8, 2008
Michael, and the rest of the O'Connor Family, my thoughts and prayers are with you this week. Your father was a wonderful teacher, coach and advisor. He will be missed greatly.
Michael Pasternak
October 8, 2008
ARMS!!! Thank you, Tom, for inspiring a generation of socially conscious scholar-athletes. A life well led, my friend. Love and respect.
Mike Dickinson
October 8, 2008
One of the finest teachers in the history of the Wethersfield School System.
linda meditz
October 8, 2008
To the O'Connor family: We are terribly sorry to hear his news. We did not know Mr. O'Connor, but are sure he touched many lives. Meg, we are thinking of you.
With sympathy, the Meditz family
Marci (Haslam) Ashley
October 8, 2008
My deepest sympathies to the O'Connor family. I will never forget Mr. O'Connor's very liberal and unique teaching style, which deeply impacted many of his students. He was an awesome track coach and a friend to many.
Lisa Maglieri
October 8, 2008
To the O'Connor family,
Mr. O'Connor had a great outlook on life and was a great teacher, he will be missed. My thoughts and prayers are with you all. .
Joe Palowski
October 8, 2008
My sincerest condolences to Coach O'Connor's family. I will always remember that smile of his and his fantastic stories at our track practices and meets. He was always able to get the best performance out of students at Wethersfield High academically and on the track field. He will be missed.
Christina
October 7, 2008
There was a moment in h.s., well a few :) that you made me feel welcome. Exceptional even and all it took was a moment. Your stories were interesting and kept, not only me, but every-one interested. Your inner strength almost surmounts your outer ....
Happy to know and will always be memorable.
<3
Tom Harris
October 7, 2008
Tom O'Connor was a great coach, teacher, mentor and motivator. He had a unique style which inspired and challenged countless students. It was a privilege to have had the opportunity to learn from him.
Janet Mulcahy Kane
October 7, 2008
My deepest sympathy to the O'Connor Family. Coach O'Connor was instrumental in my growth as a runner and student. I will never forget Weekend Runs from his house and sitting in his kitchen reviewing my college essays.
Lisa Massaro-Verderame
October 7, 2008
My deepest condolences to the O'Connor Family, you are in my prayers. I loved being a part of Mr. O'Connor's poetry class; he was an inspiration. I also valued his advice on the track. We will miss him.
David Kostek
October 7, 2008
Outside my family, no one had a greater effect on my life than Tom O'Connor. Damn I'm lucky to have had that half-crazy, anti-authoritarian, pro-humanity, freedom-loving, strangely-patient paragon of a coach!
He loved what he did, but more importantly, he cared about us. And we knew it. Teenagers need that, you know? I'm terribly grateful that I went to the right school at the right time to have had this man in my life. I'd be a different man without him.
Oh, and I can't help but think he'd like someone to come up with a completely inappropriate joke. I'm just not that brave.
Kelly Isleib Pannofino
October 7, 2008
My deepest Condolences to the O'Connor family. What a great person and track coach!!!! He will be missed.
Kelly Isleib Pannofino ( Watertown CT)
Barbara Noonan
October 7, 2008
I can still remember Mr. O'Connor teaching in his jeans, upset that he wasn't allowed to take a Monday off after a holiday break to run a marathon...and to this day I remember what he taught me about writing a solid five-paragraph essay. He was right...they would be important in college. Remember the good times and know that my thoughts are with your family.
Tracie Plante
October 7, 2008
Tom was a great english teacher. I had for all four years of high school. His way of teaching has help me in so many was. I will miss him dearly. My thoughts and prays to his family.
Greg Chlodnicki
October 7, 2008
I was lucky enough to sit in on one of Mr. O'Connor's classes years after I graduated and was glad to see he was inspiring a new generation as he had mine. His spirit lives on in all of us.
Correy Harris
October 7, 2008
My best thoughts and wishes to the O'connor's. Tom gave me wonderful memories, great knowledge, and personal strength.
Lori (Gelfenbien) Chabot
October 7, 2008
A wonderful teacher who taught us to think outside of the box. My thoughts and prayers are with the family.
Maggie Klein
October 7, 2008
I was shocked to hear the news today from coworkers that you had passed on, Thomas.
It was about twenty years ago that I first met you and you introduced me to running and to fine literature and we would run together on the weekends even in the cold falling snow. You then planned a great vacation just for the two of us and brought me to Stowe, Vermont and introduced me to skiing. That was the first time I ever saw a snow covered mountain and we had a great weekend together, that is how I will forever remember you.
I will never forget you, Thomas.
fjohn reinke (MC1968)
October 7, 2008
The Manhattan College alumni community shares the grief, and is now praying for our fellow alumni and the family at this time. The Alumni Office has been informed. As well as the Jasper Jottings community that I personally can reach. We are all a little poorer now. "No man is an island, entire of itself … any man’s death diminishes me". We are sorry for your loss.
Jim Tavares
October 7, 2008
My Condolences to the O'Connor Family. A major loss for the families of Wethersfield for whom Coach O'Connor was so instrumental in the growth of their children, both academically and physically.
Heather Chandler
October 7, 2008
Mr. O'Connor was by far the best teacher and coach I have ever had. He will truly missed.
Theresa Concatelli
October 7, 2008
Remembering Tommy from our days at South Catholic high
My thoughts and prayers are with Tom and his family and friends
D'Esopo Funeral Chapel
October 7, 2008
Our heartfelt sympathies in this, your time of grief.
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