Brendan Patrick Tremmel

Brendan Patrick Tremmel, age 16, of Malvern, PA passed away suddenly on October 18, 2022.  He was born on April 17, 2006 in Media, PA to Lothar T. and Kathleen Kane Tremmel.  Brendan was a graduate of General Wayne Elementary and Great Valley Middle School and currently a Junior, distinguished honor student at Great Valley High School (GVHS).

Ever since Brendan was a little boy, he loved his Father’s German ancestry.  He was fluent in German and spoke without an accent.  Brendan loved his AP German class – mostly with Seniors in his class - his Sophomore year at GVHS. He  continued private weekly German tutoring sessions until just the week prior to his passing.  Brendan made many trips to Germany throughout his young life to visit his family there and had the opportunity to join up his passion of world class performance cars when he visited the Geneva Car Show with his Father, the Mannheim ring with his Mother as well as the Audi factory in Neckarsulm where he got to see how cars were manufactured by robots with his Father and his Father’s closest friend, Axel Grosholz, whom Brendan thought of as an Uncle and loved very much.  Brendan last visited Germany this past summer and enjoyed every minute of it proudly speaking German and feeling completely at home.  Germany was his happy place.

Brendan also traveled to the Bahamas via Puerto Rico on a Disney Cruise to Castaway Cay when he was 8 years old.  This trip was Brendan’s idea for his family and he absolutely relished its realization.  Brendan visited Busch Gardens in Florida where he fed giraffes, baby kangaroos, held birds in his hands and watched hippos in awe.  He also joined his family on a vacation to Alaska where they flew to Seattle and spent a few days before and after taking the Princess Cruise line to several Alaskan destinations including Kethikan, Sitka, Juneau and Skagway as well as the incredibly beautiful Glacier Bay National Park.  Brendan got to enjoy so many activities on that trip including a dog sled ride, rock climbing, playing board games with his sister in their shared cabin, whale watching, going to “Mosquito Island” to pet somewhat tamed wild animals and feed a carrot by mouth to a moose who happily took it from him.  The highlight for him was zip lining with his sister over whales swimming in the Pacific Ocean below.  We stopped off in Victoria, Canada and visited the beautiful Butchart Gardens together on our return trip.  In 2018, Brendan traveled to Iceland with his sister and his parents as well as good friends from Madrid, Spain and had the great fortune to experience the Northern Lights.  Brendan was actually very well-traveled for his young age as he also made it to California, Colorado, New York, Rhode Island, Tennessee, Washington, D.C.,  Spain, Switzerland, the UK, New Zealand and Australia. Brendan especially liked Sydney, Australia and talked about going to university there one day.

As Brendan grew, he struggled making friends but his few friendships he had were deep.  Brendan did not consider himself an athlete and steered clear of most sports until the 5th grade when he came home from school one day and told his Mom to sign him up for Chester Valley Little League (CVLL).  She did it that same day so there was no backing out.  Brendan played baseball for CVLL (Fall Ball, Spring and summer seasons during the pandemic) until 9th grade when he decided it was no longer for him.  Joe Benson, a fellow student and teammate, always seemed to seek Brendan out while at practice.  Joe and Brendan shared some of the same political interests and connected at a different level than with others on the team.  Joe and Brendan were members of The Republican Club at GVHS – at a time when it wasn’t so easy to admit their political affiliation.  Brendan thoroughly enjoyed that club and always seemed to leave school a little happier when they had meetings because it was a platform to talk about things openly with like-minded peers and their Moderator.  Brendan also enjoyed baseball lessons at All Star Baseball Academy in West Chester, PA.  He particularly felt connected to his coach, Jason, who he once told his parents wasn’t just a baseball coach but a “life coach” for him.

Brendan learned to ski in Old Forge, NY soon after he learned to walk.  Brendan loved to ski and he most especially loved to ski fast.  Brendan was by far the best skier in the family.  He skied McCauley Mountain in Old Forge, NY over President’s Day weekend almost every year and enjoyed snow-mobiling there as well with his Uncles Mike and Pat and his cousins.  Brendan skied blacks and double blacks everywhere we went including Breckenridge, Colorado.  He was always the first one down waiting for the rest of us.

It was no surprise when Brendan asked to join Elk Mountain’s Junior Ski Race team as a middle schooler.  We skied Elk ever since Brendan was 6 years old so he knew Elk like the back of his hand.  Brendan never complained about the level of commitment it took to be a race team member.  He drove up to Elk in Uniondale, PA every Friday night after school with his Mom or his Dad, got up before the crack of dawn so he was on time to ski all weekend long continuously improving his skills throughout the winter ski season.  He never really made friends on the ski team but he was there trying his best.  After his practice was over, he’d meet his Mom in the lodge to ski the rest of the day with her, sometimes asking her to continue to ski the entire night session.  He loved it that much.  At times, Brendan invited different friends to ski with him from home (like Delano and Kai) so he could share one of the things he enjoyed most with them.  He even participated in Great Valley Middle School’s Ski Club.  Brendan was elated when his school friends commented so positively on his skiing abilities. I’d venture to say he felt like an Olympic athlete winning the gold then.

Brendan was an incredibly special young man who wholeheartedly cared for people.  As a first grader, Brendan started a gently used sneakers collection among his school friends and donated them to kids in need.  He bought his best friend a desk when he needed one and couldn’t afford it.  He gifted the same friend a bicycle and then bought all the components needed to help build him an e-bike, similar to the one he had built for himself.  Brendan so very much enjoyed that e-bike – riding himself to and from school so he didn’t have to rely on his parents driving him or the school bus – he liked being independent in that way.  He also enjoyed riding with his friends who also had e-bikes around Malvern or at Okehockering Preserve.  He was an expert e-biker and ordered parts all the time from Amazon to fix whatever was needed – not just for his own e-bike but for his best friend’s e-bike as well.  This past Spring, Brendan started volunteering to feed the homeless at The Saint Francis Inn in Kensington, Philadelphia, the same place his maternal Grandfather took his Mom when she was a child.  Brendan didn’t just serve the people who showed up, he greeted them with a smile and talked to them treating them just like he would treat the other volunteers working there that day – with respect, kindness and love.  Brendan was willing to do anything required – including setting and bussing the tables and mopping the floors.  He was just that kind of human being.

Brendan has said he belongs on two (2) wheels and he wasn’t referring to his e-bike.  He was referring to his many dirt bikes he owned over the years.  He got his first dirt bike, a Kawasaki KLX110, on Christmas day in 2017.  He was 11 years old.  Brendan taught himself how to ride it that very day and went on to own several dirt bikes including a Suzuki RM-Z250, a Honda CRF125 Big Wheel (which he found to be reliable but boring) and a Yamaha YZ250 which resembled more of an adult motorcycle than a dirt bike.  Brendan bought and sold these dirt bikes on his own on eBay or Facebook Marketplace with the exception of his first one.  In fact, Brendan bought and sold many things on eBay and Facebook Marketplace, taking care of every single detail himself.  He was very good at it although he didn’t think he was nearly as good at it as some of his friends who seemed to buy and sell “for a living”.  He also took his dirt bikes apart fearlessly and used youtube videos to learn how to piece them back together either alone or with the help of a then friend (with a little help every now and then from All Terrain in West Chester, PA).  He would ride his dirt bike around and around his home’s property learning how to do pop-a-wheelies and jumps with other kids from the local area as well as riding – unfortunately illegally – on the neighboring roads.  Brendan once said these were some of his happiest days.

Brendan was so many things to his family and friends.  He recently texted his Mom that his current AP English teacher asked for one word to describe Brendan and his Mom responded with “brilliant”.  He was brilliant.  If she could add another word to describe him even better, it would be “Giver”.  Brendan gave of his time freely to help others.  He gave free car washes to his Mom and Dad and even his sister’s Honda-CRV sometimes (he did not like the CRV and let everyone know about it), he spent endless hours creating spreadsheet analysis comparisons when we or certain adult family friends were daunted by the task of picking a new car or a new washing machine and talked about getting “Porsche Parking Only” and “BMW Parking Only” signs for our soon-to-be-built new garage.  Cars were certainly one of his many passions and way up there on the list.  In fact, when his Mom bought her 2022 Porsche Macan S, it was Brendan with whom the Porsche sales rep interacted and who picked every single option.  Stuff like this fueled his research efforts like no one could imagine.  He spent countless hours on youtube watching video after video after video of car reviews and car talk shows…probably enough hours to make up some people’s lifetime.  He was truly a car expert already at 16.  In fact, one day at the McLaren dealership down the road at a Coffee and Cars event, the showroom manager told his Mom that he knew more about their cars than some of their sales reps did!  He told his Mom to bring him back when he was 18 so he could go to work for them.  Even the Porsche dealership was super-impressed by Brendan’s thorough knowledge of all things “Porsche”.  I remember the day when Brendan ran down the steps yelling that his favorite car show podcast, “Everyday Driver”, hosted by Todd Deeken and Paul Schmucker in Salt Lake City, Utah, was airing the letter he wrote called “12 O’Clock Offender”, podcast #608, dated 04 June, 2021 about his Mom’s then Audi Q7 with a question whether or not his Mom should get the car fixed or get a new one and if a new one, which one  - based on his Mom’s “must haves”.  He was so proud of that podcast and the fact that they put it on air in about a weeks’ time from receipt of his email.  Paul and Todd complimented Brendan’s writing skills calling him “brilliant and hilarious” – over and over again throughout the entire show.  Brendan was indeed a very talented and gifted writer, hands down.

Brendan was a huge help with the family baby, our dog, Alice, whom he adored and she adored him in return.  He took her out to go potty, played with her when no one else did and snuggled her at bed time – whether she wanted it or not.  He loved our Alice.  

Brendan never declined to help his Mom with his Grandmother who lives next door to him and suffers from dementia.  He’d sit with his Grandmom for hours if needed so his Mom could take care of food shopping or whatever errands / social events arose.  The weekend prior to Brendan’s passing, he along with his best friend, Tamir, helped his Dad prepare the family beach house in Brigantine, NJ for winter– a place he knew and loved from when he was a newborn baby.

Brendan absolutely loved school.  He loved routine, consistency and thrived in a challenging academic environment.  Although offered to go to a different high school, namely St. Joe’s Prep or Bishop Shanahan, he remained steadfast about staying with his friends at Great Valley.  He actually toured the other schools, took the entrance exams and participated in interviews landing him acceptances at both but his parents gave Brendan the final say.  Brendan preferred it that way.  When he was little, he would protest if we told him to do his homework so we learned to ask him when would he like to do it.  He would give us a time and when the clock struck, he would follow right on through with his commitment.  No questions asked.  Brendan was a learner.  He really enjoyed science and math as well as his AP German class I mentioned earlier.  He also immensely enjoyed history – perhaps due to his natural interest in politics and current events – and this year, more than any other, he enjoyed his AP English class.  Last year, as a Sophomore, he struggled – really struggled – with Honors Pre-Calc.  He worked tirelessly to get a good grade with his Dad’s help and constantly challenged himself to do better.

Brendan actually looked forward to school every year.  It was summertime that made him anxious.  The lack of structure seemed to impact him in a negative way although this past summer he worked at the high school in their clean-up program with Tamir.  He liked the money and his supervisor but not the fact that they literally ran out of work half-way through summer.  He was bored.  

One of the things – if not the very one thing – he was most proud of was his work-out regimen.  Brendan had been working out 6 days a week for the past 3+ years.  His workouts were long – usually 1.5-2 hours/day with weights, squats, push-ups, lunges and lots of wall-sits typically in his bedroom or at the gym in a hotel when we were away.  He worked out like this literally every day – no matter if he was sick or if he had skied 12 hours that day.  He NEVER missed a day.  He loved seeing the progress in the mirror  - so much so he’d take selfies and share with friends.  He was proud of his work ethic, his body and made an effort to put on weight by drinking smoothies with lots of protein and eating (relatively) healthy – as long as that included Starbucks vanilla bean frappuccinos, a plain toasted bagel and a brownie or a cookie.  He loved his Dad’s steaks he cooked on his Green Egg as well as his own-made chicken noodle soup.  He wasn’t fussy with his food.  He knew what he liked.  

Brendan looked forward to his one day off (from working out) each week:  Tuesday.  Tuesday was his day to rest and do whatever he wanted.

Brendan recently toured Villanova University with his Mom.  He told the tour guide he was interested in studying economics because he thought it would be a marketable major in case he decided not to go to Law School.  On the way home, he told his Mom he could see himself going there.  He thought the campus was beautiful, he liked that it was close to home and how the “girls dressed”.  He also liked the fact that his Mom graduated from Villanova and his parents were married there.  It just felt like the right fit, he said.  Of course, it was only his first college tour.  He had SAT prep to do and more visits in his future.

Very sadly, Brendan’s life was cut short.  It seems unfair that this happened to such a brilliant and giving young man; someone with a future so bright, that he would have needed to wear sunglasses, as his father liked to say.  Unfortunately, this is not how Brendan saw it.  Brendan wrote in his letter to his parents, he wasn’t broken, he was “totaled”.  The pain he endured – for years – was one only he seemed to understand.  My beloved son, Brendan, died of heartbreak both thrusted upon him by others and by himself.

 

Just recently, after commencing therapy, he seemed to get better in some ways, but sometimes life throws you a curve ball and if you can’t escape it, you can get irreparably hurt.  That’s what happened to Brendan.

I like to think of a story Brendan once told me about the lifetime of dogs.  He once asked me if I knew why dogs only live a short time.  He said it’s because they learn the most valuable lesson of life in their short lifespan – to give love with all their hearts – while it takes us an average of 70-90 years to figure that out. At 16, Brendan had already learned that lesson, but not everyone wanted his big heart.

One of Brendan’s friends called Brendan “irreplaceable” and that defines him perfectly.

Brendan Patrick Tremmel was a loving son, brother, grandson, cousin, nephew and friend.

In addition to his parents, Lothar and Kathleen, Brendan is survived by his sister, Tara Rose Tremmel; his maternal grandmother, Helen Donnelly Kane; his aunts and uncles, Helen Kane Kuroki, MD (Cesar), Patrick Kane, Jr., Michael Kane (Sharon), Christine Tremmel, Judith Tremmel, Walther Tremmel, Ira Tremmel (Thomas); and his cousins, Monica, Andrew, Laura, Grace, Patrick, Andrew, Isabella, Riley, Felix, Moritz and Malin.  He was predeceased by his maternal grandfather, Patrick Joseph Kane, Sr. and his paternal grandparents, Anneliese and Guenther Tremmel.

Relatives and friends are invited to attend Brendan’s visitation on Thursday evening, October 27, 2022 from 6:00 PM – 9:00 PM at the Mauger-Givnish Funeral Home, 24 Monument Avenue, Malvern, PA and Friday morning, October 28, 2022, from 10:00 AM – 12:00 PM at Saint Patrick’s Catholic Church, 104 Channing Avenue, Malvern, PA 19355, followed by his Mass of Christian Burial at 12:00 PM.  Interment  will be private.

In lieu of flowers, memorial contributions may be made in Brendan’s memory to St. Francis Inn Ministries, 2441 Kensington Ave, Philadelphia, PA 19125.