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GARY R. BENDER

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Elmhurst High School Purdue University

GARY BENDER Obituary

Published by Legacy Remembers on Apr. 22, 2023.

GARY R. BENDER, of Ft. Myers, Fla., passed away on Tuesday, April 18, 2023. Born Oct. 30, 2023, in Fort Wayne, Ind., Gary was a son of Raymond and Betty Bender. He graduated from Elmhurst High School and Purdue University. At Purdue, he was a brother of Pi Kappa Alpha. Gary did his graduate work at University of Saint Francis in Fort Wayne. He coached for the Fort Wayne Volleyball Club for 12 years taking several teams to National Championships. He retired to Ft. Myers, Fla., after teaching and coaching for F.W.C.S. for 35 years. In Florida, Gary continued to coach volleyball for Fort Myers High School, Bishop Verot High School, USA South, and Fusion Volleyball. He was active in his retirement community playing on the softball and tennis teams. Gary died peacefully at home with his family surrounding him with love. Gary is survived by his wife, Kathleen of Ft. Myers; son, Brad of Ft. Myers; daughter, Wynn (Bender) DePasquale of Ft. Myers; son-in-law, Justin DePasquale of Ft. Myers; sister, Karen (Bender) Albee of Ft. Myers; and brother-in-law, Jerry Albee of Ft. Myers; and brother, Dale Bender of Fort Wayne. Gary has three grandchildren, Peyton Bender, Rocco DePasquale, and Siena DePasquale. A celebration of Gary's life is from 2 to 4 p.m. Saturday, June 24, 2023, at St. Charles Harbour Yacht Club, 15900 St. Charles Harbour Blvd., Ft. Myers (FL 33908.), hosted by the family. In lieu of flowers, the family requests memorials be sent to Saint Michael's Lutheran School, Attn: Principal Kati Miser, 3595 Broadway, Ft. Myers, FL 33901.

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Recent Activity

May 16, 2023

Matt Miller posted to the memorial.

April 27, 2023

Hal Rohrer posted to the memorial.

April 24, 2023

Brandy (Engelmann) Creager posted to the memorial.

4 Entries

Matt Miller

May 16, 2023

Mr. Bender was my 7th grade track coach at Portage Middle School. He was a genuinely kind man who had a way of pushing his athletes while sharing supportive words of wisdom and always demonstrating that he cared. Even when I run today, over 40 years later, I remember Coach Bender´s advice to keep my hands loose and arms relaxed. Such a genuinely good person. He made a positive impact on so many.

Hal Rohrer

April 27, 2023

Hi Family. This is Hal Rohrer - I was Gary's roommate during our Junior and Senior years at the Purdue Pi Kappa Alpha fraternity house. Gary's obituary has been shared via email with several fraternity brothers and many have commented - "Gary was one of the Good Guys". And, he was. We remember Gary majoring in education with an emphasis in PE and coaching. He was taking courses in golf, tennis, bowling, etc. while we were doing courses in engineering and math. We were envious of Gary and his studies. Reading the obituary, it is great that he lived a life teaching and coaching - doing the things he loved. May your tears of sorrow and grief be soon replaced by fond, happy memories of Gary. He was indeed one of the "Good Guys".

Brandy (Engelmann) Creager

April 24, 2023

I enjoyed playing volleyball for Coach Bender as he was a great coach that was tough at times, but that´s when we learned the most. After playing volleyball for 35+ years, his is a name I will never forget. Thank you for all the volleyball wisdom, knowledge, and skill you shared with your teams over the years.
Thoughts and prayers to the family.

Jim McConnell

April 22, 2023

My daughter had a lot of coaches in many sports during her childhood; volleyball, softball, basketball, track, and soccer. I can think of no coach that was a better coach for the kids in terms of knowing how to coach, treating the kids with respect, and just generally being a nice person and great role model. Mr. Bender touched many young girls lives in a very positive way. Wynn and Brad very closely followed in their father's footsteps. May the family's grief be tempered by knowing they shared the bulk of a life well lived by an outstanding individual, in and out of the sports arena.