Hedwig "Hedy" Jakob

HEDWIG 'HEDY' JAKOB
October 1, 1940 - March 19, 2014
It is with broken hearts that we announce the passing of Hedy Jakob, an extraordinary, amazing Oma, mother, wife, sister, aunt, daughter and friend to many.
Mom was born in Bonn, Germany, to Gustav and Maria Katharina Czepluch, October 1, 1940. Mom met the love her life, Otmar, at Konegswinter on the Rhine. Mom and Dad pursued a new life in Canada in 1958, immigrating to Edmonton where they were married, and later moving to Calgary where they started their family. In 1965, the family moved to Kamloops, BC where they planted roots and created a wonderful life in SaHali with their daughters Michele and Angelika. Mom will be remembered always for her open and generous heart, her gorgeous smile, her delicious sandwiches, meals (especially desserts), and her creativity. During our school years, mom supported our learning, from sewing tutus and Barbie clothes, making candles, and attending field trips to McQueen Lake.
Mom's gifting was hospitality. She was happiest helping others. Mom was a Brown Owl, school volunteer, canvasser for the Heart & Stroke Foundation; she worked at the jewelry department of Woolco and then Walmart with her many friends, whom she continued to meet with regularly after her retirement. Mom enjoyed sewing, knitting, pottery and quilting; she loved celebrating special occasions, especially Christmas. As a supporter of Operation Christmas Child, her handiwork and love is touching the lives of kids everywhere.Mom touched so many lives, and her passing leaves a whole in many hearts: her husband Otmar, daughters Michele (Finlay) Sinclair of Prince George, Angelika (Garrick) Fryklind of Calgary, grandchildren Cpl. Gabriel DeMone of Petawawa, Jeremiah (Daryl) DeMone of Kamloops, Ashleigh (Josh Pressey) Fryklind, Taylor (Raychelle Melano) Fryklind, Kirsten Fryklind all of Calgary, Kyra Sinclair and Emily Sinclair both of Prince George, and her two sisters in Germany, Charlotte (Klaus) Strouhal, Annemie Jurgens, many nieces, nephews, extended family, and treasured friends.
A Celebration of mom's life will be held on Thursday, March 27, 2014 at 1:00 pm in the Schoening Funeral Chapel with Pastor Harry Bicknell officiating. The family requests that if friends desire, donations honouring mom be made to Samaritan's Purse Operation Christmas Child, the Heart & Stroke Foundation, or a charity of your choice.

Eulogy:
Good afternoon – I am Michele, and this is my sister Angelika. We are Hedy & Otmar's daughters, and this afternoon, we wish to share some stories of our mother's life with you. First, we'd like to thank you all for joining us today. Your presence means a lot. As heart-broken as we are today, we want to celebrate our mother's life with you. Together we all carry a part of the story that Hedy shared with each of us. She touched so many lives. Many stories and memories are being shared with us via social media, like facebook and email, and personally by phone and with visits to our family home. We wish to thank everyone who has posted a memory and sent messages of sympathy our way, and for our cousin Shawn and everyone else for travelling to be with us. Each expression expands our understanding of how mom made a difference and how she will be remembered.

On March 19, the trajectory of our lives changed forever. A sequence of phone calls signalled the news between Kamloops, Prince George and Calgary, and later, places around the world, setting into motion our fast and most direct travel home to Kamloops to be with our father. Our mother, wife, Oma, sister, aunt, and friend passed away peacefully in her sleep leaving a huge hole in all our hearts.
Some of our fondest memories of mom are how she loved to celebrate and be with friends, especially around the dinner table, or at parties, like birthdays and New Year's. We remember wonderful birthday celebrations with our friends growing up on McGill Road. Parties always included a birthday cake with money hidden within each piece, fun games and prizes, and when we got older sleep overs that centred on swimming and time in the sauna, and ended with a delicious breakfast of fried bananas and pancakes.
Mom devoted her life to our care and well-being. Each year we looked forward to a new back to school outfit that she always sewed during our elementary school years, and new shoes from Arduini's on Victoria Street. Our routine was unchanged until we reached junior high school and she gave us an allowance and dropped us off at the mall to find what we were looking for. School days began with breakfast that she had waiting at the table each morning, hot or cold cereal, yoghurt and orange juice, always at a nicely set table. Coming home from school was wonderful as the smell of something baking, fresh buns, bread or cookies, wafted down the driveway. We'd race up the hill to have our fill.
And when we were sick mom changed hats and became our nurse. In fact, I remember wanting my mom to be with me when I was in my twenties and thirties in bed with the flu. Mom was the best at bringing tea, soup, medicine, and caring for our every need.
As we became older and got married, our little family of four grew and mom was blessed with two sons in law and seven grandchildren. She loved each of her grand kids and gave so much of herself to each of us. Her quilting, sewing, baking and cooking will never be forgotten. We all have special memories of how mom's hospitality welcomed us when we would arrive for visits; and one could never leave at the end of a visit empty handed. A week never went by without a phone call to check in and catch up on what was happening in our life. She was our go to person for recipe ideas and problem solving and encouragement. I will never forget complaining about how I would ever finish a costume I had one day to sew for Kyra. It was father's day, and I had to sew a tuxedo. I had no idea how to start and mom who was a pro at sewing everything from simple patterns to complicated wedding dresses advised that I pour a glass of wine and follow the pattern. She knew it would all work out, and she was right.
Mom was also the one we would call in an emergency. She would drop what she was doing and be with us. Mom taught us so much … the importance of loyalty, the way to love unconditionally, the strength that comes when you believe in yourself, and when that wasn't easy, she was there to cheer us on. She was so proud of all the things we did, even crazy things like running marathons. As much as she marvelled at our accomplishments, her eyes streamed with pride and her smile beamed to the moon and back.
Mom loved to travel. In our early years she brought us on trips to Edmonton, and to Germany. She loved camping, and as a family we visited the Oregon coast, Okanagan Valley and Shuswap. Spam and beans and hot dogs always tasted like a gourmet meal when mom cooked.
Mom was very close to her sister Lotti and over the years, they saw each other as often as possible. On a recent trip home mom and Lotti travelled to the area of Europe where their father grew up … it's hard to imagine what that must have been like as so much of mom's life was spent away from her family. Mom had courage; courage to follow a dream of a new life; courage to learn a new language, during a time when it wasn't popular to be German.
Mom worked before she had children at Holy Cross Hospital in Calgary. When we were teenagers, she worked at Woolco and then Walmart. She loved her independence as a working woman, and this is when we discovered that mom has a free and independent spirit. Mom had opinions and she would share them with many of us. It was a transformation that never ceased to surprise. Mom loved music, like Harry Belafonte, and Christmas songs. She started baking in late October, making everything from rum filled Christmas cakes, stolen, and delicious almond flavoured cookies.
Mom used her hands in so many creative ways. She loved to grow flowers – every spring she would be out in the garden, digging, planting, watering and caring for her plants. She became a potter, and called her business Earthy Ways in Clay. Over the years she created many beautiful pieces, from mugs to berry bowls. She opened her studio to her grandkids so they too could enjoy crafting and creating clay pieces that she would bake in the kiln. A few years ago mom began quilting. Each one she pieced together tells a story with the fabrics she carefully selected. I regret not having enough time to learn more from her.
Angelika: My Mom, also known as Hedy, Mrs. Jakob, Brown Owl, Tante Hedy, Heischein, Crazy Nuss, Oma, Grandma; or lovingly known as Sam by our Dad…..
Growing up, Mom was my constant. From my earliest childhood memories, until the day I left home to begin my independent life as an adult, Mom was there for me. I remember many times being woken up at the crack of dawn to the sound of Mom's voice as she visited with Granny Rose or Mrs. Haynes on the deck below my bedroom window. Or by the smell of French toast, Mickey Mouse pancakes and scrambled eggs wafting its way up the stairs to prompt me out of bed. Mom was most often the last person I would see before I closed my eyes for the night and the first person to greet me at the start of a new day. Mom was my constant.
Growing up in the 60's and 70's on McGill Rd was idyllic. It was a time in history where kids were free to just be kids. There was never a dull moment. My fondest memories take me back to those lazy hazy days of summers. With the cooler packed with peanut butter and jam sandwiches, carrot sticks, apples and home made cookies, we were ready for a day of bird watching, flower picking and exploring the native kqueekwillies around the Kamloops area with our neighbourhood friends, the Haynes', who lived 5 doors down. I remember a time where a group of us kids from the neighbourhood set out to hike in the forest behind our house. Mom sent us off, our backpack stuffed with snacks and drinks that would have sustained us for a week. Our adventure was short lived when we spotted a black bear in a nearby tree. Out of breath after a fast run back to safety, Mom scolded us for lying about the black bear. That evening while Dad watched the Nightly News, they reported that a black bear had been spotted in the hills of Sahali that day! That was our last unchaperoned hike in the hills behind our house.
Mom encouraged us to be creative. Under her supervision and skillful hands, Mom loved to teach us how to be fashion designers! With our friends, we would spend hours drawing, designing ,pinning, cutting and sewing Barbie doll outfits from the scraps of material Mom had left over from the clothes she sewed for Michele and I. Mom had the ability to make something out of nothing. She faithfully collected odds n ends for us to use for making crafts on rainy days. Remnants of crayons were melted down for us to create colourful homemade candles. Again, Mom taught us her resourcefulness when she introduced us to the world of Sears magazine paper dolls! Hours were spent searching for the perfect model that wasn't missing any body parts to be our latest paper doll! Days and days of fun!! Using scraps of material, remnants of crayons and the Sears magazine. Seeds planted into our growing, inquisitive minds by our Mom who was our constant.
Mom always told me that I came into this world running! Why she was compelled to endure 6 years of watching me attempt to dance, while hoping I may eventually follow in my sister's footsteps of grace, poise, and God given talent as a ballerina is something I never understood. From one free spirit to another, I finally mustered up enough courage to confess my true heart's desire to Mom that I just wanted to run. And so it began; with Mom's support, my inner spirit and passion to run was unleashed! As the free spirited child, it was a good gift to have when it came time to avoiding the wooden spoon meeting my back end! My running continued on at Beattie School track meets, cross country races, the Annual Milk Run, Provincial meets in Vancouver; and later in my adult years running marathons in Vancouver, Boston and later, the Penticton Ironman. Who was the one who instilled in me to believe in myself and never give up and was the loudest, cheerleader on my team? It was Mom. She was my constant.
Mom's gift of hospitality couldn't have been more evident than the night of my grade 12 graduation celebration. When it became clear that there weren't any plans made for a place to continue on in the grad celebrations after the dance at the KXA, I asked Mom and Dad's permission to have a few of my closest friends back to the house. They agreed. Unbeknownst to all of us, the word got out like wildfire that the aftergrad party was at the Jakob's house. The limousines began to arrive, dropping off dozens of grad students dressed to the nines ready for a good night. While Dad tried to prevent more from coming up the drive way by hosing them with water, Mom ran to the kitchen to begin cooking up a huge pot of Chile to feed all these jovial kids. Even during those days where I was so inward focused and didn't appreciate my parents, Mom was my constant. Though I can never go back and change those days of sleepless nights, grief and disappointment I must have caused Mom, we did survive those storms and moved on into a new adult relationship.
Newly married and living in Regina, Mom was always the one I turned to when self doubt, lack of life experience in the kitchen or loneliness set in. She was always there on the other end of the phone with encouragement and a pick yourself up and you can do it attitude! When she received the news that her first grand daughter, Ashleigh was born, she drove 17 hours non stop from Kamloops to Regina. She was so excited to get to us and meet her grand daughter! As Michele mentioned, Mom LOVED being a Grandma! She adored each grandchild and recognized them as the unique individuals that they are. While it became the tradition that each grandchild had their first sip of beer from Grandpa, Mom's special moment with each new grandchild was a dip in the family swimming pool.
From what we understand, Mom's last day was just another ordinary day. I last spoke to Mom on March 15th, my birthday, and we had a wonderful conversation. I always ended our call asking how Mom and Dad were feeling? Were they both well? As always, Mom responded with a yes, they were fine. Like Michele, I also wish I had one more call, one more visit, one more opportunity to learn more about what my Mom held close to her heart. She lived life with passion, courage, commitment, perseverance and determination. Her life began with hardship during World War 2 in Germany, and as an immigrant to Canada, as Michele mentioned, the life Mom and Dad envisioned for themselves and us as a family came with sacrifice, hard labour and challenges. Through the good times and bad, Mom and Dad stood by each other, through thick and thin. As partners in marriage, Mom was also very much a partner in Dad's Construction Company. With their roles well defined, Dad the "breadwinner" for the family, and Mom the "homemaker," Mom was very much involved with O. Jakob Construction as Dad's partner in business taking care of office administration. Between her duties as a wife, mother, and business partner, I don't know where Mom found the time to do all the other things she did! Even up to a few years ago, it seemed like Mom had endless energy to bake, quilt, sew, knit and volunteer her time in various capacities. Of course, she was always ready to welcome us into her home. She provided for us a place of refuge, the spare rooms always ready, the coffee pot on, and gourmet meals of comfort and nourishment prepared for us all to enjoy! At the end of our all too short weekends together and as we made our rounds of heartfelt good byes, I will forever see a vision of my Mom as she stood at the top of the drive way waving good bye and blowing kisses to us as we drove away. Deep in my heart, I always wondered if this would be the last wave. Tragically, it was on November 17, 2013 when Garrick and I left from our wonderful weekend celebration marking our Dad's 80th birthday.
Michele: One of the most cherished memories my sister and I will have was on the morning that we waved goodbye for the last time after dad's birthday. Prior to our departures, we sat down with our parents and read God's Love Letter, each of us reading a verse.
The letter begins …
My child, You may not know me, but I know everything about you … I know when you sit down and when your rise up. I am familiar with all your ways, even the very hairs on your head are numbered. For you were made in my image … In me you live and move and have your being … For you are my off spring … I knew you even before you were conceived … I chose you when I planned creation … You were not a mistake, for all your days are written in my book …. I determine the exact time of your birth, and where you would live… you are fearfully and wonderfully made … I knit you together in your mother's womb … and brought you forth on the day you were born … I have been misrepresented by those who don't know me; I am not distant and angry, but am the complete expression of Love; and it is my desire to lavish my love on you…
Simply because you are my child and I am your father; I offer you more than your earthly father could; for I am the perfect Father; every good gift that you receive comes from my hand; For I am your provider and I meet all your needs; My plan for your future has always been filled with Hope. Because I love you with an every lasting love. My thoughts toward you are countless like the sand on the sea shore; and I rejoice over you with singing; I will never stop doing good to you; for you are my treasured possession; I desire to establish you with all my heart and all my soul; and I want to show you great and marvelous things; If you seek me with all your heart, you will find me. Delight in me and I will give you the desires of your heart; for it is I who gave you those desires; I am able to do more for you than you are able to imagine; For I am your greatest encourager; I am also the Father who comforts you in all your troubles; when you are broken hearted I am close to you; as a shepherd carries a lamb, I have carried you close to my heart; one day I will wipe away every tear from your eye; and I will take away all the pain you have suffered on this earth; I am your Father, and I love you even as I love my son Jesus;
For in Jesus, my love for you is revealed; He is the exact representation of my being; He came to demonstrate that I am for you, not against you; And to tell you that I am not counting your sins; Jesus died so that you and I could be reconciled; His death was the ultimate expression of my love for you; I gave up everything I love that I might gain your love; If you receive the gift of my son, Jesus, you receive me; And nothing will ever separate you from my love again. Come home and I'll through the biggest party heaven has ever seen. I have always been Father and will always be Father. My question is … will you be my Child. I am waiting for you."
Our prayer is that Mom is dancing in heaven, creating a garden for us all to enjoy when we join her there.
Your being here today marks the beginning of our healing journey. Thank you for being here with us. Thank you for the words of comfort and condolences, prayers and your friendship. While we know there will be hard days ahead, we feel your comfort and friendship.