Panfilo Crisostomo

Panfilo "Paul" Crisostomo was born on April 16, 1987 to Debra Castro Crisostomo and Panfilo Crisostomo Sr. Born premature and weighing just 2 lb., 7 oz., Paul showed early on fighting for his life as a "preemie" the perseverance, heart and determination that would define his existence. As a newborn, he eventually built up enough strength to leave the hospital and begin his life in the loving arms of his mother and father and large and dedicated extended family.

Paul grew up in Highland Park in Northeast Los Angeles, California, where he developed a love of sports. Paul was a skilled baseball player. Away from the diamond, he LOVED his local sports teams: The Lakers, USC Trojans and, more recently, The Rams. But no team enjoyed more of Paul's adoration and unbounded loyalty than the Los Angeles Dodgers. He loved going to Dodgers' games with family and friends and many of us have special memories of sharing that experience with Paul.

Paul worked at Vons Supermarket for six years, eventually becoming a supervisor. At the time of his passing, Paul worked for the U.S. Census, prepping for the 2020 Census count: a critical job for our democracy and one Paul took great pride in. However, his most important job was helping his grandmother Margaret, who Paul loved dearly, and his mom, Debra, in serving as caretakers to his beloved grandfather, Fred Coca, who was struck with dementia and needed constant care. Since the day he was born, Paul had a special bond with his grandfather and that connection only grew stronger after the untimely passing of Panfilo Sr. in 2000 – who Paul also loved dearly. Paul's devotion to his grandpa's care during his greatest need was the biggest indicator of his love.

As for Paul, he was deeply loved by all of us – he had special and genuinely unique relationships with each and every one of us. But our collective love, as massive and unending as it is, pales in comparison to the love his mom, Debra, had for her son. She adored Paul and loved him unconditionally. She was and will always remain his biggest champion, and he will forever hold a special place in her heart – where no one else can enter. And we know Paul will be her angel watching over her until they meet again.

It would be impossible to talk about Paul's life and what he fought tooth and nail to overcome to reclaim his existence without mentioning that he was a SURVIVOR of sexual abuse by a priest as a young boy. With the help of other survivors and his mom, family and friends, Paul took remarkable steps forward in his recovery from this trauma. His fellow survivor friends say Paul was a SURVIVOR/THRIVER. At the time of his passing, he was very proudly sober five years, three months and 27 days. And he was someone who was clearly looking forward to making each day better than the last.
On June 5, 2019, less than a month before his passing, Paul posted this quote from writer C.S. Lewis on Social Media: "You can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending."

And Paul definitely succeeded in doing that. And we are all incredibly proud of the life he lived.

Panfilo "Paul" Crisostomo's good fight ended on July 3, 2019. He was just 32-years old. He is survived by his mother, Debra, sisters, Paula and Barbara Crisostomo, grandmother, Margaret, aunts, Paula Crisostomo, Pamela Borboa and Nora Mendoza, uncles, Alfred, Victor, Rick, Jeff and Tom Crisostomo, and Rick Coca, as well as scores of loving cousins, nieces, nephews, in-laws and friends.

If you wish to honor Paul's life, please donate to organizations that support and uplift clergy sexual-abuse survivors, such as Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests (SNAP) at www.snapnetwork.org.

May Panfilo "Paul" Crisostomo rest in peace.