Paul Edward - PJ- Schafer III

Paul E. "PJ" Schafer III, age 20, died suddenly on March 23, 2003. He was the beloved son of Paul and Vivian Schafer, big brother of Bryan and Chelsea, and adored grandson of Mary Van Hessen and Louise Schafer. We will all miss him dearly.

To the right of this biography is the "Guest Book" button. We have been told that these tributes bring both consolation and inspiration, and we agree. Also to the right there is a "Sign Guest Book" button. By clicking on this button you can tell a story about PJ or just write what is in your heart. We look forward to reading every one of these tributes.

We have started a Research Fund at the Johns Hopkins Heart Institute to foster the study of sudden cardiac death and pre-mature heart disease. If you are interested in helping us fight this disease, Please contact:

Kristen Ulman
The PJ Schafer Memorial Fund
C/O Tech Team
1941 Greenspring Drive
Timonium, MD 21093
410-560-0677

The 7th Annual PJ Schafer Memorial Golf Tournament that benefits the Johns Hopkins Heart Institute will be held on Thursday June 17, 2010. If you are interested in information about this year's tournament please call 410-750-0737 or go to http://www.pjschafer.com .

Also a star has been named in memory of PJ. For the astronomers out there it is near the right edge of the Ursa Major constellation and the coordinates are: RA9h54m13s D 53*51'

The Biography of Paul Edward (PJ) Schafer III

Paul Edward (PJ) Schafer III started his life on February 24, 1983. There was snow on the ground that was left by a 24" snow that fell the prior week. On the way home from the hospital we picked up a computer (Commodore 64). We knew that he was going to grow up in the Information Age, and that he would need these skills to be successful in life. By the age of 9, he was teaching his Dad things about the computer.

He started school at the St. Thomas Parish Day School at the age of 2. He remained there through Kindergarten, and he made several life-long friends there: Lexi Poklemba, Fafi Olazagasti, and Evan Gambrill.

Before his first birthday, he took the trek to Deep Creek Lake with a few of our friends from college. This became a tradition that continued each year for rest of his life. The three families that shared this experience with us (Rosenblatt's, Decker's, Santos') are part of our fondest memories of PJ.

At the age of 3, a major event rocked his world. We believe, that it was this event, that gave him his sly smile and launched him on his path of leadership. That event was the birth of his brother Bryan. PJ was now a Big Brother. He now had someone to play with, to fight with, to tease, and to mentor. Quietly, PJ was Bryan's strongest advocate.

In 1989, at the age of 6, PJ started first grade. He also started to play soccer and baseball, which he continued until high school. He was a good student and an even better athlete. He also started exhibiting artistic tendencies through his coloring and singing of the Sesame Street Songs.

At the age of 8, PJ got a big surprise. He now had a Little Sister. Chelsea was born on November 7, 1991. She was born with a condition known as Congenital Bi-lateral Dislocated Knees. When she was 3 months old, she had an operation to partially correct this condition. PJ helped his sister and remained steadfastly by her side throughout the ordeal. It was this experience that molded PJ's desire to lookout for the underdog and protect those that were weaker than himself. The compassion that he learned form this experience stayed with him for the rest of his life.

PJ flourished at Hillcrest Elementary School. He had great teachers, and made good friends. 4th Grade was a watershed year for him. His teacher, Russ Jones, sparked PJ's interest in reading, and boy did he read. He read nearly 100 books that year. His favorite author was Brian Jacques. He read all of his books and even had Mr. Jacques autograph a couple of those books. PJ's other favorite book was "The Hobbit". I read it to him when he was 5 years old, and he read it several other times throughout his school years for the purpose for book reports. We all wish that PJ would have been able to see the The Lord of the Rings movie trilogy with us. He would have loved it.

For middle school, PJ, and some of his elementary school friends, decided to go to a brand new Magnet School called Sudbrook Middle School. He chose science and math as his main area of concentration. While at Sudbrook, he enjoyed some great field trips. Two of the most memorable ones were Marsh Mucking on Smith Island on the Eastern Shore for four days, and the exciting trip to Disney World, Florida to learn about the inner workings of roller coasters and Space Mountain. How excited and nervous Vivian and her friends, Karen Brown and Linda Dugan were to let the kids go on their own to Florida without their parents as chaperons. As usual, everything worked out and they all had a blast. PJ brought a bottle cozy back for his Dad, and it is still one of his father's most prized possessions. PJ played the saxophone in the school band, and went on many camping trips with the Boy Scouts. They went whitewater rafting, on weekend bike trips (John Dugan and PJ always managed to have a full stash of snacks stored away in the corner of their tent). He also went on lots of hikes and camp outs, in some of the most beautiful parks in the area. Each summer, Bryan and PJ would attend Boy Scout camp with their buddies and their favorite mentor Mr. Jacque LaVasseur. One of PJ's favorite trips was rafting down the Youghiogheny River with crazy Brian Kemp as their guide. It was probably one of the greatest highlights of his scout trips. Each February, the scouts would plan a ski trip to Deep Creek Lake and the accommodations were always very simple. Lots of granola bars, red fruit punch, sleeping bags, shaving cream for entertainment, little sleep, good companionship, lots of laughter, skiing and just plain healthy fun. During the summer, PJ and Bryan spent a lot of quality time with their cousins, Doug and Scott Musser doing lots of boy things. They swam on the Wilde Lake Swim Team, biked all over Columbia, watched lots of videos and played PlayStation and video games till mom was ready to scream. The four of them just had so much fun together…they loved to annoy Vivian, Tante Pam, and Chelsea with their goofy noises and wrestling. This was also the summer we went to Bush Gardens with the Boyd's and got stuck on the Alpengeist roller coaster and had to walk down! PJ always said our family could never do anything in an ordinary way.

In 1997 PJ started at Catonsville Senior High School. He was reunited with some of his elementary school friends that he had missed while in middle school. He made the JV Soccer team in the fall and played defense. He had a strong leg and could kick the ball a long way. In the spring he was cut from the baseball team and his friend Matt Hook talked him into trying lacrosse. In true PJ fashion, he never once complained about being cut from the baseball team, and he never looked back. His decision, to play lacrosse, turned out to be the springboard to many of PJ's best memories. He was a fierce competitor on the lacrosse field and what he initially lacked in skill, he more than made up for with his intensity. He picked up the skills quickly. The Catonsville Football coach, Warren Cumo, saw PJ's intensity when he played lacrosse, and convinced PJ to play Football in the fall instead of Soccer. That summer we took a vacation to Maine. One of the most memorable moments of any of our family vacations happened on this trip. Vivian spotted what she thought was a 'rare bird'. PJ handed me the video camera with a smile on his face and I proceeded to capture this moment on tape while PJ and Bryan were laughing in the back seat. It turns out that this rare bird was a Sea Gull. We have had a lot fun over the years with this story. We also ate a lot of lobster while we were there. Family gatherings were very important to us. We had many outings with our college friends and their kids – The Poklemba's, The Shaeffer's, and The Chilcoat's. PJ worked in a variety of jobs, mostly restaurants and lawn care.

In his sophomore year he played football in the fall and lacrosse in the spring. Kyle Holden, Tim Favinger, John Dugan and PJ were together most weekends playing basketball, watching videos and eating lots of Jean Holden's terrific snacks. Over spring break PJ was lucky enough to go to The Netherlands with his grandmother (Moma) . He attended the 50th anniversary party of Paul & Nina Van Hessen and spent time with our good friend JanJaap Mol. Moma, PJ and JanJaap had one of their most memorable conversations while eating dinner at Applebee's in the town of Scheveningen. This summer we took a trip to Indiana to spend 4th of July with the Brandt Family. We also visited Notre Dame, Chicago, (Holland, Michigan) and we spent a few days at the lake front vacation home of Joe and Tammy Rice. PJ learned how to water-ski on this vacation. On the way home, we stopped in Dresden, Ohio, home of the Longerberger Basket factory. Everyone except Vivian complained about that stop.

In his junior year he ratcheted up his academic and athletic schedules. He took the AP History class and all GT and honors courses, and continued to have fun with his good friends Kyle, Tim, and John. He also, at the prompting of his good friend Matt Hook, decided to join the Wrestling team in the winter season to help stay in shape for lacrosse. During this year we made many college visits, and we have many memories from this. One such memory is a college visit we took to JMU with the Glascock family. We always have a lot of fun with them, but this trip included the infamous "Chicken Dinner Story". PJ loved telling this story with his many voice impersonations. I wish I had taped one of them. Also during this year he attained the rank of Eagle Scout in Troop 456 at St. Marks Church. PJ's good friend, Matt Hook, also attained this honor a few months before PJ. Matt and PJ always encouraged each other, so Matt waited to do his Eagle Court of Honor until PJ could join him. On March 26, 2000 they held a Court of honor for both of them. It was a proud day for both families. That summer, PJ was selected as the Grand Marshall for the Annual Catonsville 4th of July Parade. A couple of weeks after the parade PJ embarked upon what he called "The Adventure of a Lifetime". He was to spend 2 weeks at the Boy Scout Ranch in Philmont, New Mexico. His crew hiked nearly 80 miles and scaled the highest peak at the ranch, Mount Baldy. He wrote an essay on what this experience meant to him, and I have posted it to the tribute area. After the Philmont Trek, we met PJ in Albuquerque, NM to take a family vacation. We took 11 days and drove over 2000 miles. We visited 6 National Parks, spent a couple of days at Lake Powell, 3 days in Las Vegas, NV and a day in Sedona, AR. PJ said that this was his favorite family vacation. We have a lot of memories of this vacation and the whole summer. This completed one of the best years of PJ's life, but it was just a glimmer of what was to come.

PJ's senior year brought heroics on the football field, solid academic performance, very good SAT scores, admission offers to all six colleges to which he applied, 3 proms, high honors for his lacrosse play, and some new enduring friendships. He was voted the Most Valuable Player on the High School Lacrosse team, he made 2nd Team All County, and was selected to the Maryland State Senior All Star team. Playing lacrosse in college was important to PJ, and he decided to spend 2 years at CCBC preparing for a 4-year college and playing lacrosse for a good Junior College team. The Senior Prom capped an incredible year of activity for PJ. His date, Karli Libertini, bought flip-flops that matched her dress and decorated them with sparkles. They both were proud to wear them to the prom. He also went to the Howard High Senior Prom with Megan Glascock and they had a lot of fun.

He started at CCBC in the fall of 2001. He set up a small apartment in our basement, and bought a car. He was on his own, but still closely connected to our family. Having him close to us during his first 2 years of college turned out to be a greater treasure than we could have ever possibly imagined at the time. As PJ worked hard academically and athletically, he made a lot of new friends. In lacrosse, his team won the regional tournament. PJ's love for lacrosse grew stronger with every game. During this summer, PJ and Bryan worked together as camp counselors at GlenElg Country School. They had the best time and really enjoyed working with Carrie and Ben Shanks and Lexi and Cap Poklemba. We went to Ocean City with our cousins and had the time of our life. Later that summer we went back to Ocean City with the Priest and Poklemba families and just thoroughly enjoyed each other's company.

During his sophomore year at CCBC, he was made the Captain of the Men's Lacrosse Team. He also started his search for a 4-year college. Playing lacrosse was still high on his list, and several colleges had an interest in either his lacrosse or academic capabilities. In early March 2003, he accepted admission to Salisbury State University, and seemed poised to follow a career in Information Systems and Business.

March 23, 2003 was a beautiful day, and CCBC was playing Herkimer College from NY. CCBC struggled through most of the game, and a few minutes into the 4th period PJ came out of the game complaining of chest discomfort. I noticed, through my binoculars, that he looked like he hurt his shoulder. For next few minutes he was putting ice on his shoulder and chest. He seemed to be in a lot of pain, so I told Vivian that I was going to go over to him to find out whether or not he would need a ride home. By the time I got there he was lying motionless on his side. Some people were yelling his name trying to get his attention, and the trainer pulled him over to his back and saw that he was not breathing. They started CPR and called 911. The game was stopped and all of his teammates and the Herkimer team were cheering him on and begging him to come back, but he did not. I am sure that he heard their screams of encouragement and that he knew, he was not alone in his final moments of life here on earth. PJ had the heart of a warrior, and in the end, that is what did him in. It gives us some measure of comfort knowing that PJ spent the last few hours of his life doing what he loved to do the most – Play Lacrosse.

We will miss him deeply, and we will never forget his patented smile or his dry wit and humor.

PJ, We Will Love You 4EVER!