Albert Edward Tobey

Albert Edward Tobey was born in Arlington, Massachusetts on June 25, 1936 to Edwin A. Tobey and Eldora R. (Whitten) Tobey. He was the second of three children, welcomed by older brother Glenn. His younger sister Marilyn was born two years later.

Al (as everyone but his mother called him) grew up in a duplex in Somerville Massachusetts, and on the streets of the Winter Hill neighborhood (although he claimed not to know Whitey Bulger). He had a reputation as a scrappy tough kid, as evidenced by the story his sister told of one night when she was followed by two teens, until one of them noticed "Hey, isn't that Tobey's kid sister?" and they took off.

Al proudly attended Somerville Trade High School, where he studied his father's occupation of carpentry. In 1954, he enlisted in the Army Corps of Engineers and spent three years in and around Stuttgart, Germany, rebuilding the country after the destruction of World War II. He enjoyed meeting all kinds of people and learned a few German phrases, most notably "zwei Bier bitte". (two beers, please!) He also endured three years of living in a pup tent in all kinds of weather.

When he returned to the States in 1957, he began working as an orderly at Brigham and Women's Hospital, where his mother was a head nurse. In 1962, he caught the attention of a young nurse, who had just moved to the area from western Massachusetts. She stole his cart and hid it, he found it and found her.

Barbara Ann Mills was looking for just the right guy. She knew Al was the one after they went out bowling. She, a natural athlete, beat him soundly, but instead of getting upset, Al was impressed and told her so. After a short courtship, they married on April 27, 1963, and moved together to an apartment in Arlington.

In January of 1964, they welcomed their first child, daughter Joanne Marilyn, named after Al's kid sister. By that time, Al had earned his associate's degree in electrical engineering at Wentworth, and was working at MIT, where he spent several years.

Their second child, Dianne Louise, came along in 1966, and in 1967 they made the move from Arlington to Auburn Avenue in Wilmington, MA, where, they spent the rest of their lives.

Al worked hard at his profession, earned a bachelor's degree in night school at Northeastern University, and earned almost all the credits toward a master's degree. Work travel in his days at AVCO led to his having to give up his plans for that degree. His love of learning, never ended, however, and he continued to read voraciously, and to study and play chess for the rest of his life.

The next years were filled with family life and a lot of hard work and travel, to Albuquerque, New Mexico, to Colorado, to California and to many other locales. Although he would rather have been home, he took those trips to advance his career and he always brought back something for his girls, from flight pins to playing cards. When he wasn't working, he joined with a great group of friends in bowling and golf leagues and lots of evenings out to friends' homes with Barbara, where they would play cards and laugh and enjoy themselves late into the night.

Al was always a great friend, always ready to share a beer and a laugh, always ready to help out. The neighbors on Auburn became like family, as did several of his work friends Throughout his life, he never met a stranger, and called everyone his buddy.

In the late 1970s, Barbara and the girls finally convinced Al to try tent camping again. He immediately fell in love with the relaxed atmosphere, time out of doors with family and friends, campfires and an escape from the ever-present stress of his job. Camping became a family pastime he enjoyed up until 2024, as even when he was limited by his dependence on oxygen Joanne found a way to get him set up in a tent with a cot and his concentrator.

Al was a great lover of animals. Growing up, he would often visit his uncle George's farm, where he loved to ride the huge draft horses and help his uncle when he entered the horses in pulling competitions in local fairs. He loved to tell the story of how his mom allowed him to keep a snapping turtle, housing it in their bathtub for several weeks. He and Barbara got their first puppy as soon as they moved to Wilmington, and he would spend hours after work playing ball with Cricket. He was a bit leery of getting a cat, but loved all of the ones that became part of their family, especially Kizzy who was a great source of comfort after the sudden death of Barbara in 2021. He enjoyed helping Joanne and her search and rescue dogs Bramble and Roo in their training, and he was always ready for a trip to the barn to pet Chloe or to anywhere where he could be around the horses.

Al's last job was probably his favorite, as Vice President of Operations for QC Optics, a firm started by his good friend George Quackenbos. He liked to tell everyone that all he did all day was walk around and talk to people, although his expertise at engineering and management were a great fit for his work.

Barbara retired from her work as a nurse in 1998, and Al followed two years later. They were able then to fully indulge in their love of camping, wintering in Georgia and Florida, and taking a memorable trip across the country for their 50th anniversary. Their retirement was partially precipitated by the birth of their first grandchild, Leo. They made sure that Leo, and then Glennis and Estelle, were always aware of how much they were loved, and Al's new name of "Pika Al" given to him by one year old Leo, became his new favorite after their many games of peek a boo. Through several trips a year to Chicago and then Cleveland, as well as family vacations in New England and two trips to Disney World, Pika Al and Nana made amazing memories that Dianne and her family will never forget.

When not traveling, Al and Barbara greatly enjoyed their time as members of Meadowbrook Golf Club, where Barbara was a several time club champion and Al her biggest cheerleader. On the course, one of Al's best traits became evident – he never took himself too seriously and was always ready to notice the best in others. He also became Joanne's "hiking buddy" – visiting local state parks and conservation areas and exploring the trails with her, using his trusty hiking stick. And he even tried (and enjoyed) snowshoeing!

After Barbara's sudden death in 2021, Al soldiered on, despite several serious health issues. Some of his favorite sayings became "This is the day the Lord has made" (a throwback to his days in Sunday school at Winter Hill Baptist Church, where he often would sneak out the bathroom window rather than attend class) "Pretty sky" (and when it was grey, it was because God was working on the other side of the canvas) and "getting better every day" He was always working to get better, whether that meant getting up and down from his chair, or walking Auburn Ave, where neighbors would look for him and even put out a chair where he could rest.

Joanne became his caregiver in these last days, taking him to appointments and sitting with him in the hospital as those stays became more frequent. He was an anxious patient, especially without Barbara to calm him down, and Jo worked hard to ensure he was cared for well. They also had many "adventures" – camping, visiting a draft horse rescue, traveling to Salisbury Beach in the winter, and traveling to some of the unique outdoor places in New England -- including a special weekend trip in January 2023 to a bed and breakfast in VT. When Dianne and his grandchildren came to visit, he was always waiting to play a few games of cribbage, and they continued his adventures by bringing him to York Beach and the Nubble Lighthouse, and of course Kimball's and Mac's for ice cream. He was always ready to go, mostly because he enjoyed being together with his family.

Al leaves many friends from all over the globe – from his online chess connections (he had at least five games going up until his death) to those he met on trips to Cleveland to be with Dianne and family, and winters camping in Georgia and Florida. He kept in close touch with his coworkers at AVCO and QC Optics including a couple in Japan. Up until last summer, he looked forward to his times at Meadowbrook Golf Club and meeting with his golfing friends. He made deep connections at Wilmington United Methodist Church, and of course with the Auburn Ave. neighbors, even those who moved away. He loved to meet new people and make them feel at home, inviting them to share a beer or dinner or whatever else was available, sometimes causing Barbara to have to cut the hot dogs in half and add a little water to the baked beans.

Al is met in heaven by his parents, his wife of 58 years Barbara, his brother Glenn (Phyllis) and sister Marilyn, and special friends both human and animal. He will be forever missed by daughters Joanne and Dianne (Jane Thorkelson), grandchildren Leo, Glennis (Carmen) and Estelle, grand dog Roo and kitties Razzle and Rowan, as well as beloved sisters- and brothers-in-law and dear nieces and nephews and their families.

Joanne and Dianne are forever grateful to his many caregivers, especially those at Benchmark Assisted Living in Billerica, Beth Israel Lahey and the VA, and Beacon Hospice, and the endless help, care and companionship of friends, relatives and neighbors, including Pastor Peter and the members of Wilmington United Methodist Church, where he and Barbara joined in 1967. His loving spirit, great good humor and gregarious nature will be forever missed. You are invited to raise a glass of your favorite beverage at 4 pm on any afternoon, as he will be joining you in Tea Time with Barbara. Thank you for being everyone's buddy, Dad. We love you.

Family and friends will gather for a funeral service at 1:30 p.m. on Saturday, August 2nd, at the Wilmington United Methodist Church, 87 Church St. (Rt 62), Wilmington. Services will conclude with military honors. Visiting hours will be held on Friday, August 1st, from 4-7 p.m. at the Nichols Funeral Home, 187 Middlesex Ave., (Rt 62) Wilmington. Memorial donations in Albert's name can be made to the Draft Gratitude Horse Rescue, https://www.draftgratitude.com or to the Central Mass. Search and Rescue, http://www.cmsart.org.