Dorothy Ann "Dede" Conlan

Obituary of Dorothy Ann Conlan

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Dorothy Ann Conlan, better known as Dede, beloved mother of seven, grandmother of twelve - and to her more recent delight, great-grandmother of six, passed away suddenly on August 12, 2025, at her home in Mountain Lakes, New Jersey. She was 89 years old.

Born in Waterbury, Connecticut, in December 1935, to the late Huston and Marie Carolan. Dede grew up in Wolcott, in a house her father built by hand. From an early age, she and her sister, Marita, spent their days swimming, boating, and ice skating on the nearby lake. A talented long-distance and synchronized swimmer in her youth, Dede developed a lifelong love of the water that became a hallmark of her legacy.

Dede possessed an endearing natural beauty. She won beauty contests as both an infant and a teenager, but it was her quick wit and charm that drew people in. She graduated from Sacred Heart High School and attended St. Lawrence University, where she caught the eye of Raymond "Jay" Conlan, the love of her life. They married a year and a half later, in February 1955. Following an adventurous drive home from their honeymoon in Acapulco, Mexico, they began the family that would grow to include four sons, three daughters, and a lively menagerie of cats and dogs. In time, she earned her degree from The College of St. Elizabeth. A lifelong and devoted animal rescuer, Dede opened her home and her heart to any stray that wandered within reach.

In the summer of 1966, they settled in Mountain Lakes, moving into a three-story, eight-bedroom stucco home that quickly became the heart of the Conlan family. That same year, Dede began teaching swim lessons at the town's lakes, sharing her love of the water and instilling confidence in generations of children. For more than 40 years, she served as Beach Director for Mountain Lakes' two swim beaches, teaching lessons, training lifeguards, her children and many grandchildren included, and overseeing daily operations with equal measures of discipline and care.

In 2009, Dede was named Citizen of the Year by the Borough of Mountain Lakes Council in recognition of her exceptional commitment and contributions to the Laker community. Her presence was so constant each summer that, to young and old alike, she was simply "Mrs. Conlan."

Dede and Jay were avid travelers, drawn to the discovery of new cultures. They explored widely, from Mexico to Alaska, across the Americas and through Europe, but held a special affection for Italy, returning time and time again to experience its many regions. They regaled their family members with their stories of adventure, inspiring many to choose to travel, and some to live abroad.

Dede's life was defined by her loving commitment to her ever-growing family and her community. She gave countless hours of service to The Community Church of Mountain Lakes, serving multiple terms as a trustee, working on numerous committees, and helping guide many of its renovations and upgrades.

Her home remained the heart of family life - the setting for countless holidays, milestones, and even the occasional wedding on the lawn, always filled with high-volume cackling laughter and joyful bedlam. No gathering was complete without her well-loved brownies, some with nuts and some without, a small but telling gesture of care that made everyone feel included. Dede tended to life's smallest details with quiet devotion, whether mending a button, decorating a cake, or sewing a special garment, always finding just the right way to let each person in her large family know they were loved.

She leaves behind a legacy of strength, humor, generosity, and steadfast love that will endure in the lives she touched. She will be deeply missed by too many to count.

Dede is survived by her children, Michael (Katie) of Scarborough, ME; Timothy (Lena) of Bozeman, MT; Lorrie McCarthy (Terry) of Nutley, NJ; Kathleen Burnett of Cedar Grove, NJ; James (Claudia) of Barcelona, Spain; and son-in-law Thomas Silk of Rockaway, NJ. She was the grandmother of Eileen (Teddy), Sheila (Raynor), Nora (Ryan), Julia, Kyle (Rachel), Conor, Olivia, Gabriela, Sofia, Carlotta, Gavin, and Colin; and was the loving great-grandmother to Sloann, Brecken, Owen, Cora, Esme, and Sutton. She was predeceased by her husband, Jay; her son, Jeffrey; and her daughter, Melissa Silk.

A service to celebrate Dede's life will be held on Friday, August 29, 2025, at St. John's Masonic Lodge, 280 Boulevard, Mountain Lakes, NJ. Visitation will begin at 4:00 pm, followed by a memorial service at 5:00 pm and a reception afterward.

Arrangements were provided by Codey & Mackey Funeral Home of Boonton. To share condolences or memories with the family, please visit CodeyMackeyFH.com. In lieu of flowers, donations can be made in her name to the World Wildlife Fund, a cause close to her heart.