Nancy Polonitza

Nancy Polonitza was born in 1948 to Edmund Polonitza and Margaret Mackin Polonitza, the third of four children, and raised in a rich family environment among the multiple ethnically-distinct neighborhoods of Bayonne New Jersey. Whereas her Bayonne contemporary, George RR Martin, took that experience to imagined perpetual rivalry and conflict in Game of Thrones, Nancy built a practice of caring and love for all. For many of us here today and those who have had the privilege to have met Nancy in the past, she soothed the discordant impulses, calmed fears, taught how to move forward with hope, perseverance, insight and good decision making.
Professionally, Nancy received an A.B. in Psychology from what became Kean University in Union NJ and an M.Ed. In College Counseling from the University of Delaware, Newark DE. She went on to spend 3 years at the State University of New York in Plattsburgh, and then in 1976 joined Ocean County College in Toms River and Manahawkin NJ. She remained there, in a faculty position, until retirement in 2014.
Nancy achieved and maintained, to the end of her life, certifications as National Certified Counselor and a Licensed Professional Counselor for the State of NJ, with additional competencies in counseling supervision, that is, to teach and train other counselors. Following 9/11 and Sandy she became certified in Disaster Response. She received additional education at University of California, Los Angeles, at Chestnut Hill College in Philadelphia, and at Rosemont College. Her crisis intervention training including such topics as managing students at risk, mental health awareness for safer campuses, handling difficult conversations with college students, and anger management.
Nancy is known by many for her commitment to yoga and to meditative practice. She was a certified yoga instructor from the Sivananda Yoga Vedanta Society, achieving Yogi Siromani, and, among other activities, was trained in Vipassana Meditation at an advanced level. She taught compassionate chair yoga in a hospital setting, and throughout CoVID, led a weekly laughter yoga practice remotely by zoom with the Yorkshire UK Jain Foundation and participants worldwide.
Nancy is predeceased by her parents and by her brother Edmund, a military veteran, and her sister Patricia. Pat Kelly died in 1990 of aggressive breast cancer, leaving four daughters who became, for Nancy, her responsibility. Throughout her life, the well being of Tara, Sarah, Norah and Kathleen has been at the forefront of her concerns and activities and commitments. In the 1990s Nancy traveled to Ireland several times to connect with her mother's family, the Mackins, with the "four nieces" and their long time friend and support Tamara Richardson. Frequent phone and txt communications, and travel to where ever in the world the nieces might be, and their travel to New Jersey, continued until her death. Marking decades of mothering, Nancy formally adopted the nieces as her daughters.
Throughout her adult life, Nancy had a deep connection to Long Beach Island, and specifically to Barnegat Light. Her home there, since 1986, has been and continues to be a refuge for her family. In 2005 Nancy met and later married Colin Goodall, her first marriage, his second. She came to live with Colin in Rumson NJ. Already connected to this part of Monmouth County, Nancy formed further links and friendships in this new community, while continuing to spend time, often with Colin, in Barnegat Light. The family and friends of Colin in the UK and Europe quickly became Nancy's close and much loved friends.
Some 12 years ago, Nancy received a diagnosis of breast cancer. With Colin and Tamara at her side, she went through treatment and emerged cancer free, Nancy went on to travel widely, to retire from OCC, and to marry. In the last two years, niece Norah received a cancer diagnosis and then Nancy also. Norah and Nancy went through treatment seemingly in parallel, with chemotherapy, surgeries, immunotherapy, hospital stays, and travel for second and third opinions. Norah was in Oregon, Nancy in New Jersey, and the two traveled back and forth to spend time with and support one another. Norah passed away at the start of May, Nancy four months later on October 3rd, both at their respective homes. Nancy's last significant activity was to travel to Barnegat Light for Norah's memorial gathering on September 20.
Nancy is survived by her brother Richard and his wife Greta of Cranford NJ and their sons David of Charleston WV and his sons Noah and Adam, Jon and wife Kara of Jersey City NJ, and Benjamin of Lancaster PA, by her nieces now daughters Tara and husband David and their daughter Eliot of Houston TX, Sarah and husband Mike of Wells VT, and Kathleen and husband Conrad and their daughter Skye of Reutlingen Germany, by Johnmark Larson widower of niece Norah of Portland OR, by her nieces Nancy Ellen of Charlottesville VA and Neely and husband Josh and their daughter Chellie Rose of Bloomfield Hills MI, by her husband Colin of Rumson NJ, and by Colin's sons, Nancy's stepsons, Jesse and wife Stephanie and their son Leo of Rye NY, and Charles and wife Agata of Carolina Beach NC and, in Nancy's final days and after, of Highlands NJ.
Throughout her life Nancy formed deep and abiding loving connections, and this was perhaps never stronger than in her last year of life, with friends joining their support with that of close family. We mention Elaine and Pete Schardien, Joey and Adam Sobel, Gwen and Bill Wasilewski, Angela and Bill and Logan Johnson, Kat and Mike Quon, and Christl Schambach. There could and should be many others on this list. Beyond all else, Nancy's friendship with Tamara Richardson spans 50 years. Tamara and Nancy have been at each other's sides through decades of celebration, hope and heartbreak. They say, justly, that Nancy is a member of the large extended Richardson family of Monmouth and Ocean Counties and North Carolina.
Nancy will be buried alongside her sister Patricia the morning of October 30 at St Mary's Cemetery in Manahawkin. Her memorial service, followed by a repast, will be at 5:30 pm on October 30 at the Unitarian Universalist Church in Lincroft.
Nancy is deeply loved, and we miss her so very much.