Thomas Secrest Jr.

1949 - 2025

Thomas Samuel "Sam" Secrest Jr. passed away peacefully at home on November 19, 2025, at the age of 76. He went out just as he would have wanted, with hands laid upon him, surrounded by friends and family sharing stories and laughter.

Sam was born on March 11, 1949, in Troy, NC, to the late Tom Secrest and Dolly (Cline) Secrest of Spencer, NC, and was preceded in death by his sister, Debbie Padgett; Lynne Hoagland, the mother of his children Joshua and Jennifer; his adopted daughter, Nicole; his wife, Sandy Williams; and his wife of 22 years, Miki Jaeger.

Surviving him are his brother, Mark; children Joshua and Jennifer; his adopted son, Robert; stepson Adam; granddaughter and namesake, Samiko; and the dearest of witchy friends, Linda and Shannon. He was a beloved Uncle Sam to many, including Linda's children Lilli, Hannah, and Annie, and Shannon's daughter, Salma.

Raised in Cary, NC, as a young man Sam was a Boy Scout, a volunteer firefighter, and a student school bus driver. Later in life, he recounted epic tales of the rural debauchery of his youth, which often included guns, explosives, and booze.

He attended Elon College, later transferring to UNC Chapel Hill, and received a degree in business. He was a proud member of the Marine Corps Reserves (1971–1977) and often said that if he had gone straight into the military after high school, he never would have left.

He first worked with his father in real estate and later had a successful business selling commercial insurance. During that time, he travelled the country teaching others his trade. After retirement, he opened a home repair and refurbishment contracting business, employing a multitude of impressionable youth.

Sam married Lynne Hoagland in 1976. They welcomed children Joshua, then Jennifer, and he also adopted Robert and Nicole, Lynne's children from a previous marriage.

Sam got sober in 1975 and remained so for the rest of his life. He was an active member of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA), helping countless people navigate sobriety and sponsoring many along the way.

In 1984, he had major brain surgery to correct an AV malformation, resulting in hemiplegia on his left side. He never let it stop him and was defiantly independent, despite his disability and taught the world about resilience and what it meant to be a fighter.

He was a great father and friend to many. Sam read poetry and Norse mythology to his children, told the best stories and provided "opportunities for discovery". He thought every child should be turned loose with a knife and some matches. He had many friend groups: neighbors, dog-walking friends, high school friends, AA friends, Boy Scout friends, and friends from Legacy. While he was unapologetically inappropriate, he was usually entertaining.

He made it a point to tell the people in his life how much he loved them and how proud of them he was. Most importantly, Sam lived a life of service to others-as a Boy Scout leader, a volunteer firefighter, a Marine, a teacher, a sponsor, and through the Legacy Center. He loved fiercely and sinned bravely.

So, in the spirit of Sam, we invite you to shoot guns, use a blowtorch on the ice in your driveway, rev a chainsaw, sic your little dog on a squirrel and reward it with a sausage biscuit, tell a dirty joke, tell a scary story, laugh so hard you fall on the floor, and howl at the moon.

Despite his request to be skinned and sewn into a bean-bag grandpa, we opted for cremation. His ashes will be scattered with those of his late wife, Miki Jaeger, and his adored Westie, Fiona.

You are invited to share your memories of Sam with family and friends on Tuesday, November 25, from 4–6 p.m. at Kildaire Farms Racquetball Club, 302 Pebble Creek Drive. Well-behaved dogs are welcome. Ill-behaved people are expected.

Special thanks to his friend, Regan Brown, and his caretaker, Jasmine, for their support in his last months.