Thomas Matthews III

1953 - 2025

Thomas Matthews, III

September 21, 1953 - August 5, 2025

Raleigh, North Carolina - Thomas Stanhope Matthews III, went home to the Lord on August 5, 2025. Born on September 21, 1953, "Tommy" was the firstborn of T.S. Matthews Jr. and his wife, Betty Taylor Matthews. Three siblings would follow: Mark, Bettina Gardner (who predeceased him), and Neal. They grew up together in a small house in the McCullers community, on a farm settled by Tommy's great-grandfather in 1903. Tommy would later build his own house on that same land, living there until the day he passed, alongside his wife Brenda Roper Matthews and son Nathan.

Tommy was always deeply connected to the land, his community, and the Matthews familyeach a central part of the other. A 1971 graduate of Garner Senior High School, it was no surprise that he chose a career in law enforcement, following in the footsteps of his grandfather, Thomas Stanhope Matthews Sr., as a Wake County Deputy Sheriff.

Whether patrolling or working undercover, Tommy often faced dangerous and life-threatening situations. He consistently demonstrated steely calm and professionalism in protecting the citizens of Wake County over a career that spanned five decades, with steadily increasing responsibilities as a supervisor and leader within the Sheriff's Office.

After retiring in 2004, Tommy was not ready to end a lifetime of service. He joined the ranks of other former law enforcement officers helping to train a rebuilt Iraqi police force tasked with establishing the rule of law in a war-torn country. Often left to their own devices, Tommy and his colleagues fought insurgents and criminals, routinely taking direct fire as the United States sought to foster a bastion of stability in a region still searching for peace.

Upon returning home, Tommy found that retirement was not his path. He rejoined the Sheriff's Office as Assistant Director of the Wake County Jail in Raleigh, where he served another four years. Even then, duty called. In 2022, Tommy ran as a candidate for Wake County Sheriff. Though ultimately unsuccessful, his campaign brought important issues to light and contributed to the continued evolution of an office committed to the fair and effective application of the law in North Carolina's most populous county.

Only then was Tommy able to devote his full time to family and farm, seeking to build a legacy worthy of the land his family had cherished for over a century. Foundationally, he rooted his family in a strong faith in God, which was always his lodestar on this journey. Tommy's quest ended unexpectedly on August 5th-but that legacy lives on in those he touched.

He is survived by his former wife, Pamela Stafford of Wilmington; his sons, Thomas Stanhope Matthews IV of Kennesaw, Georgia, and Michael Matthews of Raleigh, and daughter Natalie Manning of Wilmington. Along with Brenda and Nathan, six grandchildren, and numerous nieces, nephews and cousins, they carry on the memory of a brother, father and husband of faithful courage, devoted to family dinners, as accomplished with a chainsaw and stick welder as he was with his sidearm, always thoughtful and remembering of kindnesses far more given than received; a man with an infectious laugh and warm heart that served as an endless reservoir of love.

A celebration of Tommy's life will be held at 3 p.m., on Sunday, August 10th, at Calvary Raleigh Church, 7900 Ten-Ten Road, as family and friends gather to honor a life well lived and the memories that endure.