Margaret Grimes

1934 - 2021

Margaret Grimes

Hanover, NH — Margaret "Polly" Van Peenen Grimes died peacefully at the Kendal at Hanover on May 7, 2021. She was 87. She is survived by her husband of 62 years, Joseph ("Joe") Grimes, Jr.; her brother, Dr. Hubert John Van Peenen; her four children - Joseph Grimes III, Margaret Funnell, Thomas Grimes, and William Grimes; and eight grandchildren - Samuel Funnell, Joseph Grimes IV, Nicholas Funnell, Catherine Grimes, Isabel Grimes, Lucas Grimes, William Grimes, and Natalia Grimes. She was predeceased by her sister, Mavis "Mimi" Van Peenen Villareal, and her brother, Dr. Peter Franz Dirk Van Peenen.

Polly was born to Dr. Hubert John and Mavis Warner Van Peenen in Pensacola, Florida on April 18, 1934, the third child of four in a Navy family. She moved often in her childhood as her father, a surgeon, completed his surgical training in multiple states and territories. In early 1940, she moved to Guam, which she remembered as an island paradise where she played with the local children and became proficient in the Chamorro language. The family's time there was cut short, however, when she, her mother, and her siblings were evacuated in October 1941. Soon after, her father was taken prisoner and spent the rest of the war as a POW in Japan. A few months after returning to the US, Polly and her family moved to Mexico, where her mother found a teaching job and pursued a PhD. The children attended local schools, and Polly became fluent in Spanish and French, helping to spark a fascination with languages that stayed with her throughout her life.

After her father's return from Japan at the end of the war, the family lived for several years in Long Beach, California before Polly left for college at Sweet Briar in 1950, at the age of 16. She took full advantage of the opportunity, spending her junior year at St. Andrews in Scotland and graduating at the top of her class before heading to Paris on a Fulbright Scholarship. There, at the age of 20, she not only honed her French and her love of travel, but also met the love of her life - Joe Grimes, a Yalie and fellow Fulbrighter whom she described as "the handsomest man" she had ever seen. While Joe proceeded to do his military service from 1955-58 in Japan and Taiwan, and Polly completed an MA in French from Middlebury and a BN from Columbia, they kept in touch and married at the end of 1958.

Polly and Joe enjoyed the happiest marriage we have ever seen. They moved around the world with their four children, satisfying her thirst for travel. They lived in Guatemala, Washington DC, Rhode Island, Minnesota, Belgium, and Japan before settling down in Washington DC in 1993, and eventually the Kendal at Hanover in 2012. Among the many places she lived, Guatemala and Tokyo held special places in her heart, and she was still exchanging letters with her Japanese friends nearly until the end of her life. While the family moved based on Joe's work and Polly raised the kids and managed the household, it would be hard to describe her as a "housewife." She was, at least equally, a lifelong student and lover of learning. She earned an MS (Georgetown) and PhD (University of Minnesota) in Linguistics and taught French at George Mason and Linguistics at Sacred Heart University in Tokyo. Her graduate studies spoke to her flexibility and determination - she earned her MS while living near Washington DC, did her PhD coursework in Minnesota, did her research (on the dialect of Bruxellois) in Belgium, and wrote it up while living in Tokyo. While in Belgium, she became proficient in Dutch, and over her 12 years in Tokyo became proficient in Japanese. She also loved literature, reading broadly in English, French, and Spanish. And, partly thanks to Joe, whom the children at one point nicknamed "the tennis fiend," she played tennis regularly with friends and family.

Family was extremely important to Polly. She wrote weekly to her mother until her mother's death in 1991 and stayed in close touch with her three siblings. While she repeatedly claimed that she had "retired from being a mother" every time one of her children graduated from high school, she was a constant support and always welcomed them back home for visits, gave advice, and insisted on over-reimbursing them for every imagined expense when they would visit. She was endlessly proud of her children and grandchildren and was completely devoted to Joe.

At Kendal, she remained very active. She started French and Spanish tables and, for most of her time there, was an active hiker. As a participant in the hiking club, she climbed most of the New Hampshire Presidential Range.

Polly lived a full and fulfilling life. We are grateful for having shared our lives with her for so long, and for all the lessons and enjoyment we had with her. At her request, there will be no memorial service and her ashes will be scattered by the Cremation Society of New Hampshire. In lieu of flowers, the family requests donations be made to Doctors Without Borders. May she rest in peace.