MARION HESSMAN Obituary

MARION HESSMAN (Age 85)
On Wednesday, September 17, 2014, of Silver Spring, MD. Beloved wife of the late John Francis Hessman, Sr. She is survived by three children, 10 grandchildren, and three great-grandchildren and a sister, Margaret Vreelend. She was preceded in death by three sons Jack, Gerard, and Robert J. Hessman. Relatives and friends may call at Collins Funeral Home, 500 University Boulevard West, Silver Spring, MD, (Valet Parking), Friday, September 26, 2014, from 3 to 5 and 7 to 9 p.m. Mass of Christian Burial at St. John the Baptist Church, 12319 New Hampshire Avenue, Silver Spring, MD, on Saturday, September 27, 2014 at 10:30 a.m. Interment Arlington National Cemetery at a later date. www.COLLINSFUNERALHOME.com

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Published by The Washington Post on Sep. 21, 2014.

Memories and Condolences
for MARION HESSMAN

7 Entries

Kimberly Absher

September 26, 2014

Grandma, You were Heaven on Earth. You were always an angel & now you finally have your wings. I always think of you when I read this quote & try my best to live by these words as you always did..."People are often unreasonable, irrational, and self-centered. Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some unfaithful friends and some genuine enemies. Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and sincere people may deceive you. Be honest and sincere anyway.

What you spend years creating, others could destroy overnight. Create anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, some may be jealous. Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, will often be forgotten. Do good anyway.

Give the best you have, and it will never be enough. Give your best anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway."

~Mother Teresa. I love you & miss you so much, but I know how happy you must be, so I smile for you. Your love, kindness, & beauty left a mark on us all. I cannot wait to see your beautiful face again someday. Put in a good word for us up there.

Jack Pruitt

September 25, 2014

Grandma,

Life can be cold and difficult sometimes but people like you make it a brilliant, wonderful journey. Your warmth, kindness and love touched everyone with whom you came in contact. In your own gentle way, you made the world a better place and made all of your children and grandchildren better people.

Thank you for helping my young mother raise me, thank you for helping me defeat cancer and thank you for always caring. All of your grandchildren were blessed to have such a bright, loving matriarch.
Your struggle is over and you are now in a better place. I'm positive they waved you right on through the pearly gates without any hesitation; no ID check or anything. Rest in peace my beautiful Grandma.

Joni Friedman

September 24, 2014

Marion, I can picture our blessed Mother holding you in her arms and carried you to heaven. You were a very special person and will be greatly missed.
To Kathy and all the Hessman family, our thoughts and prayers are with all of you.
Joni, Mike, Jeaneen and Jane

Richard Absher

September 24, 2014

Grandma,

When I said my final Goodbye to you at the Hebrew Home, I could tell by the look you gave me that it was your time to finally obtain peace with God. I told you in person but I want to thank you once again for teaching me so much. Even though you were my Grandmother, I was closer to you than my own mother, Katherine, for such a long time. You were there for every baseball game of mine growing up, witnessing many of my outstanding performances as a pitcher. You loved the fact that I had a cannon for an arm. You were so proud of me. My life was absolutely perfect when you were around. I would ask you all sorts of questions growing up as a little boy because I knew through your unwavering faith that you had a tremendous amount of knowledge about life. And you would take the time to answer each question as best as you knew how. Consequently, I soaked up as much knowledge as I could based on what you taught me. You taught me education is the ticket to success, relentlessly out working your competition will put you in the best position to succeed, to always be genuinely kind to others since relationships are what make life a wonderful journey, and faith is the answer to any obstacle.

However, as you know, on the day of your accident my mother Katherine and I were the last ones to say Bye to you. I still remember every detail of that day. I remember you giving me a hug and kiss on our front porch at the house we had in Huntingtown, MD. For some reason I had a feeling I can't really describe that came to me when we were saying Bye to each other that day. It was like nothing I had ever experienced before so I really wasn't sure what it meant. After you gave me that hug and kiss, you told me you loved me and I of course very clearly responded back telling you that I loved you too. I walked with you down the sidewalk, going away from the front porch, when my mother Katherine came out from the direction of our garage to also give you a hug and kiss. The two of you also exchanged I love you's and my mother and I said Bye to you one final time as you got in to your car in our driveway. I remember as you slowly backed down our driveway, I walked back toward our front porch glancing back at you as you began to exit the driveway. Once you were about ready to put the car in drive, I waved to you one more time from the front concrete slab that was in front of our front porch. You noticed, and waved back to me, even blowing me a kiss. I stood and watched you drive away, of course never knowing it would be the last time I would ever see you healthy again.

It was a beautiful autumn day. I went through the whole day at school without any idea of what happened to you. Once I got off the school bus at the corner of Small Reward Rd. where the bus would drop me off, I walked up to our mailbox to retrieve the mail like I always used to do. I remember having the mail in my hands, looking at what was there when I saw from the corner of my eye, my father's Aunt JoAnne pull up who lived down the street. She immediately pulled into the end of our driveway, got out, and told me, "Your Grandmother has been in an accident. It's serious. Your Mom should be calling you sometime this afternoon to tell you more." I responded, "What? She was in an accident? My Grandma is going to be okay, right?" Aunt JoAnne responded by saying, "Adam, I don't know. You should come down to my house to have dinner in a little bit." At that point I remembered that feeling I had when I was saying Bye to you Grandma from our front porch earlier that morning and I knew instantly it was bad. I had to decline to Aunt JoAnne and remember saying, "Thank you. I might come down later but I want to be alone for right now." Aunt JoAnne drove away and I had my book bag on my back as I carried the mail into the house. I walked back down the driveway where your car was, back down the front sidewalk where I walked you to your car, and back on to the front porch where I said my Goodbye to you and told you that I loved you. I remember turning the knob to our burgundy front door, opening it, and as I walked down the little hallway leading to the kitchen, tears started to stream down my face. I set the mail on the kitchen table that my father's father built, and sat in one of the wooden chairs in the kitchen where I absolutely balled my eyes out. Grandma, I couldn't stop crying because I already knew you were seriously hurt. I didn't need someone to inform me of your condition. For some reason, I just knew. I remember crying for hours. I cried for a very long time, crying myself to sleep...

After officially finding out what happened to you, Grandma, I have to be honest, I was very angry at God for a very long time. In fact, I lost my faith from the entire situation. My parents advised me not to see you for a while as you were not the same Grandma I knew before. Of course it wasn't up to me to keep you alive or to let you pass on but I know one thing: knowing you were in such bad condition really affected me mentally and emotionally. Remember how strong of an arm I had with baseball? Well, I was so traumatized by everything that I could only lob a baseball. There was no zip to my pitches any more. I dealt with a severe depression that I never really told any one about, losing interest in sports entirely because I knew if I was on that mound pitching, I was never going to be able to glance over behind the dug out and see you there supporting me. It's one thing to lose a loved one unexpectedly but it's truly a different animal when I lost my best friend and still had to keep living my life knowing you were in the condition you were in. During my own healing process Grandma, I really tried. I would visit you at the Hebrew Home from time to time to remind you I hadn't forgotten about you. But, seeing you laying there, unable to give me those hugs and kisses you used to give me, it absolutely broke my heart. I lived with a tremendous amount of guilt for a long time. I replayed that morning of October 24th 2000 in my mind over and over and over again. Questions like what if I had you come back in the house to pet my cat Little Dawg one more time? What if I did this? What if I did that? Anything to possibly delay you from coming in contact with that deer.

As weeks turned into months and months turned into years, I was never quite the same playing baseball again. I think a lot of it had to do with not having any type of closure to your situation. Knowing you would never again attend one of my baseball games, the game as a whole reminded me too much of your suffering. As a result, I got into other sports such as football, basketball, and even track. Even though baseball was by far my best sport, I chose to pursue football further. I ended up battling several serious injuries, never really able to remain healthy enough to show what I was capable of. All of that physical pain with the multiple surgeries I had paled in comparison to the immense pain I dealt with mentally and emotionally from your accident. Since you would always be so positive when you were helping my parents raise me, I figured if you were going through such a terrible situation that you were battling, I can certainly utilize that work ethic you taught me to regain my own health. So that's what I did, giving each set of a workout everything I had. I picked up running because I found that was the only thing that truly helped me cope. I would run at all the local high school tracks in Calvert County to get myself in the best shape that I could possibly get in. Honestly, it was also a way for me to pretend to be running away so I could somehow forget what happened to you. It became an addiction, so with every mile I ran, it was one step closer to my dream, but also one step further away from that trauma I experienced from your accident. I would run until my stomach burned all the time. I did play college football and you would of been proud of that. But it was short lived due to all those severe injuries I had that I told you about. I guess it wasn't meant to be. I did give it every ounce of effort I had for a decade so I don't have any regrets at all from it. Giving it my all is all that I could do.

I want you to know Grandma, I thought about you ALL the time throughout those 14 years of you battling at the Hebrew Home. With my mental and emotional state during those 14 years, I visited you as much as I could handle. I hope you understand. But I did truly mean what I said when I told you that morning on October 24th 2000 that I loved you. I really do love you. Always have, always will. I just had to go off to take some chances in my life and to live my life. I know you would of wanted me to do that. I guess you could say I ran away because I saw college football as a way for me to move as far away from Maryland as I possibly could. I just couldn't live there any more. What's ironic is where I ended up playing college football, was in the heart of the "Bible Belt" in Mississippi. I met a lot of wonderful people who shared that same unwavering faith you taught me. They even surprised me one day by buying me a Bible with my name engraved on it. At the time my faith wasn't all the way there because of your situation so I never really read it but I did keep it and still have it to this day. I'll always have it with me as long as I live. Now that you have passed on, a lot of what you taught me about faith has for some reason returned back to me. Now that I am older and I have accepted what happened to you, I can now see some of what maybe God was trying to do through you. To me the whole situation was such a paradox. Yes, you suffered a great deal, but you also successfully battled for 14 years. As I looked out your window while holding your hand during the final days of your life, I noticed that huge tree that was visible from your room. I started to think 14 times those leaves on that tree fell in autumn, and grew back again each spring. All the while your heart of gold continued to pump with each passing day. To me it is absolutely unbelievable. I know your genuine faith kept you alive for us all to take note of. However, for others to see what I now see, they have to open themselves up to it; to see maybe why or how you lived so long at the Hebrew Home. My last words to you on this Earth, you looked me in the eye the entire time, so I know you heard everything I said. I of course told you I love you. And I do with every ounce of life I have. But before I walked away from your bed for the final time, I did not say "Bye." This time I said, "I'll be seeing you again." Because although your passing is a very emotional time for everyone here on Earth, I know you know what I meant with those words. I will see you again when it's my time to be with God because I did lose my faith but I now have it back again. My mindset going forward with my life at 27 years old is to follow your gracious example. I will live as much of a Godly life as I possibly can. I'm of course human and will make mistakes here and there but I'm now smiling typing this message to you as I realize all that you taught me before and even after your accident. You never were able to speak many words in those 14 years after your accident but I feel like God did that for me to find out on my own the reasons why He had me be the final person to see you completely healthy along with my Mom. After all these years I feel like God wanted me to realize that it was faith that enabled you to stay here with us on Earth for 14 years. It was faith that allowed you to endure and handle the suffering. And I know it was faith that was the key to opening up those gates of Heaven as you moved on to be with not only God, but Grandpa and Uncle Jack.

I knew on September 17th 2014 that you were going to pass on. Remember that feeling from back in 2000? Well, I had a feeling once again on September 17th 2014 while I was at work here in south Florida. I kept checking my cell phone because I knew my Mom was going to end up calling me to inform me of your passing. Sure enough I was on the road when my Mom called me to tell me you were finally at peace with God. I immediately started to cry much like I did back on October 24th 2000 so I had to pull over to let those tears out once again. However, that grief became mixed with happiness because I knew you were finally with God. What you lived your life always wanting to achieve, to be with our Father. Looking at everything now, I realize what that feeling from October 24th 2000 meant. It was a sign from God forewarning me he was going to put me through intense trials and tribulations to test my faith. He sure tested it, even having me lose it, but my faith is now much stronger than it ever was before after I allowed myself to see what He wanted me to see through you. Additionally, that similar feeling God provided me on September 17th 2014, I see now was to warn me that He was about to guide you home. I am so incredibly happy for you! Everyday I still think about you and of course always will. I can still hear your voice which now provides me with an enlightened smile that I know everyone who is around me notices. I'm sure going to miss you Grandma. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for all that you did for me and for so many others. You're THE example we need to all follow as we go on to hopefully live our own long lives here on Earth. I know God has already blessed you Marion Hessman. A loving wife, mother, Grandmother, and forever my best friend. See you again Grandma whenever it's my time to come home.

Very Respectfully and With All the Love From My Entire Heart and Soul,

Your Grandson,

Richard Adam Absher

Tom Mullen

September 23, 2014

To the Kevin, Cathy and Mary Alice , our prayers and thoughts are with you. Your mother is now in heaven with dad and bro. The Mullen's

Norinne (Hessman) Browning

September 22, 2014

My Dearest Aunt Marion, You were one of a kind and will never be forgotten. I have such wonderful memories of you--your beautiful smile, your powerful prayers, your kindness, your great sense of humor, your welcoming me into your home with "Hi Love, Come in, you look terrific!" I admired your hard work and tenacity in going back to college and graduate school as an adult. You could and would do anything you set your mind to, including building a porch and stairs off the kitchen using only some books and your incredible mind--remember this was pre-Internet times! When Jesus finally called you home I'm sure you flew straight up to Heaven and were reunited with those you love, your husband, your children, your sister-in-law Mary (of course) and so many others. I am happy that you are finally out of pain and the frustration of living a life for these last 13 years that was so different from the life you had before. I will always miss you, I will think of you often and one day (hopefully a long, long time from now) we will be reunited in Heaven. God bless you Aunt Marion, you were a huge influence in my life and you will continue to be as I try to live my life like you lived yours--full of prayers, spirituality, happiness and hard work. Love always, Norinne

Casey Absher

September 22, 2014

Grandma,
You are beautiful inside and out. I'm thankful for all you did for our family. Thank you for teaching me to always do the right thing and to be kind. I miss you everyday, and I miss waking up to you at the house. I even miss you telling us to clean up after ourselves so Mommy could have a break. I know you are now at peace and looking down on us, encouraging us to be the best we can be, everyday. I will not let you down.
I love you!

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