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Theodore Paulding Obituary

It is with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of T.R. Paulding, beloved husband, father, grandfather, brother, son, uncle, and friend to all who knew him. T.R. passed peacefully on Thursday, March 27, 2025 after living with cancer for 18 years. T.R. will be remembered as kind, warm, loving, fun, silly, quick-witted, cheerful, hilariously funny, generous, and the most genuine, good-hearted person you could hope to meet. An eternal optimist until his final days, he was truly one of a kind and a bright light in this world. Born on August 11, 1955 to Mary Rose and Ted Paulding, T.R. grew up in Wethersfield with his siblings Martha, Ray, and Sarah, with whom he shared a close relationship for all his life. He excelled at sports including basketball, football, and tennis, and would recall his game-winning home run in the little league championship as his greatest sports glory. He also enjoyed water sports like swimming, water skiing, and too-fast boating in the Niantic River. Summers were spent in Old Lyme, where he started a children's recreation program. Soon he was known as the pied piper of Old Lyme Shores, as children would line up outside the Paulding cottage to wait for T.R. each day. The friendships he made over a lifetime of summers there remained important to T.R. until his last days. T.R. graduated from Wethersfield High School in 1973, where he starred as Captain Von Trapp in The Sound of Music. He spent the next four years at his cherished University of Notre Dame, where he met his lifelong brothers at Morrissey Manor. While at Notre Dame, he played intramural football, made it to the sweet sixteen in the famous Bookstore Basketball tournament, was named "Mr. Morrissey," joined the glee club, and entertained everyone he met with impressions of Jerry Lewis and his natural talent for playing piano and singing. The spirit of Notre Dame always remained part of his life and was passed along to his family and friends. T.R. then attended UConn Law School where he sometimes went to class and supported himself as a singing waiter at JP's Good Times Parlor in Hartford. At UConn and as a young lawyer he gained another group of lifelong friends. His law career included time as a public defender, an assistant state's attorney, a criminal defense lawyer, and a motor vehicle hearing officer. He saw his career not through a lens of winning or losing; it was his duty and honor to help those who needed it, and he always strove to do the right thing. He will be missed by the entire law community on all sides of the courtroom. T.R. married the love of his life, Michele, at their special place, the Griswold Inn in Essex. T.R. and Michele's love story felt like a true-life fairy tale, and their devotion to each other was legendary among those who knew them. Together they raised four children in Glastonbury in a home filled with laughter, joy, and love. After Michele suffered a stroke in 2015, T.R. lovingly cared for her until her passing in 2023. He considered it his privilege to love her until the end of her life and beyond. In his later years, he revelled in being surrounded by his five grandchildren, attending their special events and games, and nurturing in each of them what made them unique. He loved that he was the only "Dippa" in the world. It would be impossible to recount all of T.R.'s beautiful life in a few short paragraphs, but if you were lucky enough to know him, you don't need the full play-by-play. He was a friend to all he met, and he couldn't leave the house without meeting (and chatting to, at length) someone he knew. His love of music was passed on to his family, and singalongs around the piano were common, especially during the holiday season. We are all jealous of the many amazing concerts he attended while at Notre Dame, and we had the pleasure of attending many more with him throughout the years. He dreamed of opening an Irish pub where he could tell stories and celebrate his Irish heritage. He loved flowers and hated yard work, but did it anyway. He was our personal brunch chef and made perfect golden-brown pancakes. His encouraging and supportive nature made him a natural coach. He helped so many people as a lawyer and as a friend, and did it with a full heart. We will always remember family road trips to Notre Dame and Florida, as well as the many quick getaways he planned, because he couldn't think of anything better than spending time as a family. T.R. is survived by his four children, Daniele Paulding Daveline (Nick), Nichole Paulding Susat (Rick), Adrian Paulding (Lexie), and Aaron Paulding (Allie); and five grandchildren. He is also survived by his siblings, Martha Paulding Kardok, Raymond Paulding (Cathy), and Sarah Paulding, and numerous nephews, nieces, in-laws, his extended OLS family, and friends near and far. He was welcomed into heaven by his wife, Michele; his parents, MR and Ted; and many friends and family who were undoubtedly delighted to reunite. It is not often that a person is as universally loved as T.R., but he earned every bit of it. Calling hours will be held on Thursday, April 10, from 4 to 7PM at the Farley-Sullivan Funeral Home 34 Beaver Road, Wethersfield, CT. A celebration of his life will follow on Friday, April 11, from 11AM to 3PM at the Wethersfield Country Club, 76 Country Club Road, Wethersfield. All who loved T.R. are welcome, and we invite you to wear blue, gold, and green in honor of his love for Notre Dame. Go Irish! To extend condolences, please visit Farleysullivan.com. To send flowers to the family or plant a tree in memory of Theodore "T.R.", please visit our floral store.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by WFSB on Mar. 28, 2025.

Memories and Condolences
for Theodore Paulding

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Mark Conley

August 5, 2025

Happy heavenly birthday TR. I can see you sitting at a grand piano playing and singing your favorite songs. Hope you are resting in eternal peace.

Timothy Bourret

April 10, 2025

None better than T. R. A true Notre Dame man, I was a classmate and fellow resident of Morrissey Manor. Don't know aore caring person. RIP a to a wonderful person.

Janice Wolf

April 10, 2025

I was so sorry to hear about TR´s passing. I worked with him in GA12 when I was a young public defender and he was in private practice. He was an amazing lawyer. Thoughtful, kind, smart, and compassionate. He taught me about the type of lawyer that I wanted to be. He had endless patience and we would often chat about our cases and strategies for obtaining desired outcomes. He was an absolute light and so quick to smile even when his cases were challenging or the state´s attorneys were being particularly difficult. I am grateful to have known him.

May he rest in peace.

Janice Wolf

Patty, Greg, Ben & Madison Taber

April 7, 2025

We are so very sorry to hear of TR´s passing. Such a genuinely kind, funny, empathetic man that we were lucky enough to share many fun times with in the "hood". TR and Michele were truly a loving couple who always smiled/glowed even in times of challenge. Never complaining always finding the brighter side. There is no more pain or suffering for TR and now reunited with his love, Michele and all that have gone before him.
I wish you all comfort in the memories and love you hold dearly in your hearts. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
With deepest condolences,

Michael Gabor

April 4, 2025

I will always treasure the time we spent together coaching baseball with our kids! To spend the time with our kids and their teammates and you was very special! I always considered you a good friend and I am definitely a better person having known you and your family!

Bill Fitzgerald

April 3, 2025

To the Paulding family.
I am so sorry to read of T.R.´s passing. The obituary was spot on. I recall the Jerry Lewis impression, playing a lot of hoop, but I did not know he went to ND. Ha ha.
The all inclusive rec program that T.R. built brought so many kids together, life long friendships were made and memories created. Seriously, we have chatted about how it was more than a rec program. Summertime would not have been the same without T.R. Always a smile and making everyone feel so welcome. Special person indeed. Thank you T.R., Mr. and Mrs. Paulding, and the children for making OLS a better place.
Is a bench dedication in order? Better yet, let´s rename the big rock, from the "big rock".

Linda Boisvert DeStefanis

April 3, 2025

TR will be greatly missed. I only saw him again at our more recent Class of '73 gatherings, and was sorry to hear about his health issues. I hope his family feels some relief at how many people he reached over his lifetime. God bless you all and all of his closest friends.

Jill Farrelly Morahan

April 2, 2025

T.R. Was a kind and gentle soul. I grew up spending summers at OLS where T.R. organized and lead the rec. program with joy and enthusiasm!! Always with a smile and a kind word to all. May he rest in peace.

Miriam Geraci

March 31, 2025

To know TR or as I affectionately called him Uncle T - was to love him. Not only was he my boss but him Michele and kids became family. Sitting outside talking for hours at Sound View. Hugs at the St Patrick´s Day parades. There was nothing more in this life he loved than his family. His love of the law was something I will never forget. He was truly a gentleman and a scholar. To TR´s family, Daniele, Nichole, Adrian and Aaron, I´m so sorry for your loss. Please know you are all in my thoughts and prayers.

Kathy Styslo Cooper

March 31, 2025

Sending my heartfelt condolences and prayers to all of TR's family. May the memories you hold in your heart strengthen and comfort you in this time of grief. He was a wonderful person and friend!

Adam Scott

March 30, 2025

I met TR on the basketball court in Hartford. After that I met him as a colleague and later as adversary in court. His competitive spirit matched his love for the game whether it was law or sport. I will miss him. God bless. Rest peacefully.

John Preston

March 30, 2025

T.R. and I grew up in the same neighborhood as elementary schoolboys together and were neighbors again through our adjacent backyards years later. T.R. remained a loyal friend and helped me in a time of great difficulty. We shared an interest in music and many memories of our time in Wethersfield. I remember him being smart and inquisitive in the honors biology class, obviously full of talent. He leaves this life with me owing him a steak dinner, as I promised him during our last meeting. I will have to at least upgrade that to surf and turf when I see him next beyond the pearly gates...rest well T.R. !!

John F OBrien

March 30, 2025

With my deepest condolences to the Paulding family for the passing of a great man and exceptional lawyer. Everyone who knew T.R., admired and respected him for his kindness and keen wit and wisdom. He was a consummate professional both as an astute state's attorney and as a zealous advocate for his client's as defendants. It was an honor to know and learn from him. May he rest in peace. His legacy of excellence will live on amongst his many colleagues in the criminal courts.

Ron Murphy, Farmington, CT

March 30, 2025

I first met TR when I was a very young lawyer and from the start you could tell TR was a consummate gentleman and professional. I saw him in Rockville court in December and, like always, we had a nice chat. TR didn't complain or let on about his illness and was proceeding business as usual. RIP TR. You will be missed.

Charlie Hines

March 30, 2025

TR was simply a nice person and, of course, a very talented attorney. It has been awful to watch TR and Michelle be overcome by medical catastrophe. Just not fair. Rest in peace my friend.

Don Popillo

March 30, 2025

T.R. was a true gentleman that I had the pleasure of calling a friend - we shared many great times together along with Michelle. Rest in peace T.R., Debbie & I will miss you.


















many great times together along with Michelle - rest in peace T.R. - Debbie & I will miss you
Don Popillo

Sandra Hatch

March 29, 2025

I remember T.R. from our High School days in Wethersfield. Very nice and very smart in school. Always had a smile for everyone. My sympathy to all of his family.

Sal Bonanno

March 29, 2025

A tremendous person and excellent lawyer. I will miss him. My deepest condolences to his family.

Steve Preleski

March 29, 2025

A very decent and honorable man. May he Rest In Peace.
Steve Preleski

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Apr

10

Visitation

4:00 p.m. - 7:00 p.m.

Farley-Sullivan Funeral Home

34 Beaver Road, Wethersfield, CT 06109

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Farley-Sullivan Funeral Home - Wethersfield

34 Beaver Road, Wethersfield, CT 06109-2201

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