Ken Ballinger

When Ken Ballinger started planning his funeral a few months ago, he decided he wanted it to be a party.

"I don't want any ties. I don't want any black," he told his brother, Ed Ballinger. "I want people to be happy."

Friends and relatives say that was typical Ken, always thinking about others when he had every reason to be thinking about himself.

It was an approach to life that led Mr. Ballinger to serve in the Marines, coach youth sports, work on behalf of a charity and devote himself to being the kind of dad who was always there for his two daughters.

Mr. Ballinger, who grew up in Price Hill, died of cancer April 1 in Maryland. He was 41.

Throughout his life, his brother said, Mr. Ballinger dedicated himself to serving others, in big ways and in small ones. Ed Ballinger, of Burlington, said he first saw that trait as a child when his big brother, who was six years older, let him tag along when he played baseball with friends.

If one of the kids said they didn't want to play with the younger brother, Mr. Ballinger had a ready response: "If he doesn't play, I'm not playing."

"That was him," Ed Ballinger said. "He wanted to include everybody."

The service and discipline of the Marines appealed to him, so he joined after graduating from Elder High School in 1988. He served seven years and later moved to Cockeysville, Md. with his wife, Katherine, and his daughters, Emily and Lillian.

He coached youth basketball and softball teams, including his daughters' teams, but he never sought out the loaded teams with the best athletes. He wanted to coach the "B" teams, the teams that needed his help the most.

"He took on that extra challenge," his brother said. "He loved to coach and he loved to teach. He loved teaching how to do things the right way."

When he was diagnosed with tongue cancer, he became active with the Hope Well cancer support group and helped raise money and advocate on the organization's behalf. He traveled to Washington for congressional hearings on funding for the group while struggling through cancer treatments.

He couldn't speak at the hearing, but his daughters spoke for him.

"Our daughters testified and they did it at his encouragement," his wife said. "Everything they did, he encouraged it. He was always like that. If this is what our daughters wanted to do, by God, he stood behind them 100 percent."

She said he also taught them the lessons he learned growing up: Serve others and do your best. He didn't demand that they win, only that they fight hard.

Katherine Ballinger said her husband taught that lesson again in his final days.

"He was still fighting, but he knew there was going to be an end," she said. "It was about going gracefully and fighting the best that he could. And doing it with dignity.

"Without a doubt, he did."

She said friends and family will honor his wishes Saturday with a celebration and prayer service to honor his life at St. William Church on West 8th Street, from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m.

Everyone is asked to leave the ties at home and wear Elder purple instead.

Other survivors include a brother, Steve Ballinger, of Burlington, and his parents, Howard and Janice Ballinger, also of Burlington.

Memorials may be made to the Ken Ballinger Family Fund, c/o Scott Federle at CinFed Credit Union, Room 5510, 550 Main St., Cincinnati, OH 45202.

Written by Dan Horn | dhorn@enquirer.com