Doreen S. Scanlon

1927 - 2001

Doreen S. Scanlon

1927 - 2001

BORN

1927

DIED

2001

Doreen Scanlon Obituary

Published by Vernon C. Wagner Funeral Homes - Plainview on Feb. 13, 2001.
Doreen S. Scanlon, 73, a 43-year resident of Plainview, New York, wife of the late John, died on Monday, February 12, 2001. Visitation is scheduled for Wednesday, February 14, 2001, 2-5 p.m. and 7-9 p.m., at Vernon C. Wagner Funeral Homes, Inc., 655 Old Country Road, Plainview. Further visitation is scheduled for Thursday, February 15, 2-5 p.m. and 7-9 p.m., at the funeral home. Services are scheduled for Friday, February 16, 10 a.m., at the funeral home, officiated by the Rev. Theodore Grant. Interment will be on Friday, at Pinelawn Memorial Park. Memorial donations are appreciated to St. Jude Children’s Hospital, P.O. Box 50, Memphis, TN 38105 or Make-a-Wish Foundation Gift Center, P.O. Box 29119, Phoenix, AZ 85038. Arrangements entrusted to Vernon C. Wagner Funeral Homes, Inc., Plainview, New York.

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April 13, 2001

Diane Ennis posted to the memorial.

March 16, 2001

Scott Scanlon posted to the memorial.

March 15, 2001

Patti Capwell posted to the memorial.

Diane Ennis

April 13, 2001

Dear Mom, It's still hard to believe that you're gone. Just gone from this place to another more beautiful place. I'm so thankful you are no longer suffering, tired and able to breathe and walk and dance. But, I miss you so much, everyday. You leaving me was the day I dreaded more than anything. You were always there for me in "my corner". I could talk about the most trivial things and you would be interested. I miss hearing your voice and picking up the phone almost daily to see how you were doing or tell you what was going on in my life. I felt so bad, while you were in the hospital that you couldn't speak and I had such a hard time reading your lips- you tried so hard to communicate with us.



I know you never wanted to have an operation on your lungs but I feel you did it for us. Your family was so important to you and you to us so you gave in and gave it a try. You seemed to be doing so well right after surgery only to keep going downhill afterwards. I don't think you ever expected not to make it. Your will to survive was so stong and everyone was in awe of you. You endured more than any one person should have to. During your life you hated to ask anyone for help and then you had to live out your last days having to have everything done for you. Yet you never cried and still had the will to survive. For us most of all.



I keep thinking back to the day that I last polished your nails and Laura and I gave you a haircut and gave you a facial. You seemed so good that day and I had renewed hope that you'd get well. I prayed so hard everyday, and I truly believed that would get you through it. There's so much more I wanted to do with you. I enjoyed our Saturday or Sunday drives around Long Island. You especially liked when we went to the water like Captree Boat Basin or Northport to look at the water and the boats. Or take a drive out East and stop at the farm stands. We's stop somewhere and have lunch and talk and relax. I enjoyed getting you out of the house and it was very relaxing for me.



I'm so glad the family sent us to Virginia Beach for a vacation (your last) to celebrate you 70th birthday. We had such a good time, and you got to be near the water which you loved.



Now we have the task of sorting through your precious things at your house. There's so many memories, so many pictures and reminders of you. You saved so many little things (ever so neatly, I might add). You left quite a legacy to your children. I's so hard going through your personal things. I am so thankful for the wonderful family you and Dad created, and I cannot imagine if I did not have any brothers and sister to go through this with. We've gotten even closer throught all this as a result. And, I am very lucky to have two wonderful sister in laws also. I'm sure you are very proud of what you have created. And, you did your very best to be a wonderful mother to us all and a very special Grandmother and Great-Grandmother. We all love you so much. And, you have touched us all in such a special way. Even when it came to strangers you opened up your heart and your wallet and tried to help so many. You make little hats for preemies and crocheted squares to make afghans for the homeless. Your love spread out to so many. You should have no regrets. You always did the right thing, with love.



I will miss you more than you can imagine, until the day we are together again. You were the "Wind Beneath My Wings" and I only hope you are still looking out for me as my Guardian Angel. I love you so much.



Your loving daughter,

Diane

Scott Scanlon

March 16, 2001

Dear Mom,

I'm sitting at the computer just reading all the notes from people that have logged on to help comfort us. Mrs. Capwell summed it up by saying that your family was the essence of you. You have given us all so much that money can not buy. A strong sence of family, an example of strength through all the lifetime challenges you endured, a true example of generosity and unconditional love. Kim talks about how openly you accepted her into the family (even though we know she is an easy person to love). I know that acceptance very well and I know I was blessed by having you as my mother-in-law. You were also my friend. I'll always treasure our late night visits, laughs and talks.



I'm sad when I think about all your things that are left here, but I know that now you have everything your heart could need and these things are materialistic and unimportant. I miss the sound of your voice and you. I pray that Scott and I can instill the wonderful things that Scott has received from you and dad. He is devoted to his family, generous, loving, nurturing and involved. Thank you for having him, you have blessed my life tenfold.

I am thankful for the few years the children had with you and the memories of their own. I know we all have our own funny stories about you, but be assured you grandchildren will always know the important things about you. Lindsey is now experienceing your love and I pray when she comes to us that you will send a piece of you.

Please give dad a kiss for me and may the two of you live in peace for eternity together in God's most unconditional love. All my love,

your Daughter -in-law

Laura

Patti Capwell

March 15, 2001

MEMORIES OF DOREEN



I first met Doreen Scanlon at her son Jack's third annual summer party. She was such a pretty lady, with beautiful hair, skin and dazzling blue eyes. As we got to know one another, we shared our delight that her son Jack, and my daughter, Kim had gotten together again. We both hoped their relationship would strengthen and flourish.

The next time we met was on the happy occasion of Jack and Kim's engagement party. Doreen's hopes, and mine, had come true. How thrilled she was for her son and me for my Kimmy. You could see the mother's love in her eyes for Jack. As I watched her interact with her children and grandchildren, and her darling great-granddaughter, I saw what a lovely family she had raised, and how much she loved them. How proud she was as she introduced me to them all. I remember thinking how fortunate my Kimmy was to be joining the Scanlon family. It was at the party that I first realized the extent of Doreen's illness. Despite the pride she always took in her appearence, and how wonderful she looked that day, Doreen was unable to hide her breathing difficulties.

I remember calling Doreen that Christmas and asking her provide me with some baby and childhood photos of Jack for a montage I was making. She lovingly got them right out to me. When I called to thank her, we reminisced about Kim and Jack's childhoods, and how overjoyed we were with their choice of each other. It was always a plessure to talk with Doreen Scanlon.

Of course, we all knew her condition was worsening. And with Jack and Kim's wedding approaching we all prayed for her to be there. And be there she was; beautiful in blue periwinkle that matched the incredible color of her eyes. Her arrival proclaimed by the skirl of a lone Scotich Piper-the rousing sound that she and her husband had always loved so-Doreen entered the church on the arm of her son Scott. Beaming joyfully, and moving with uncomplaining elegance, she made it through the day. And who can forget the playful squeeze to Jack's "cheeks" as they finished their dance together. Talk about amazing grace!

In the months that followed, Doreen continued to weaken. With a new grandchild on the way, the fear of losing her sadly became reality. She fought a hard fight, refusing to give up, suffering much I'm sure.

The last time I saw Doreen she was only a day away from leaving this world. She was resting and barley conscious. I took her hand in mine and told her what a beautiful family she has, and how very concerned they were for her. At the mention of her family she opened her eyes, looked straight at me, squeezed my hand with all the strength she had left. Anyone who knew her, knew her family was the core of her being.

So, Diane and Jack, Scott and Sue, you were blessed with a special Mom. Grieve for her , yes. And know, too, that it would break her heart to see her beloved children suffering sadness. Remenber her lovingly, she deserved that. But be strong for her, she would want that.

If somehow I could speak to Doreen in Heaven, I would say: Keep our Lindsay safe in your arms. Safe until the day you can send her to us on the wings of an angel. For Lindsay will be a continuation; God's way of showing us that Doreen Scanlon's life goes on. And I promise, every time I give a grandmother's hug and kiss to our darling little Lindsay, I will also be sure to hug and kiss her for you.



Rest in Peace Special Lady,

Patti Capwell

Linda & Dan Ackley

February 20, 2001

To Jack & Kim:

I was so saddened to hear the news of the loss of you Mother. I have been praying for her safe assent to God for months now and though I didn't know her, I can imagine the pain you must be feeling. To know that she is with the angels may not be enough to soften the blow, but thinking of her spirit adding to your daughter-on-the-way will give a freshness to the new life you are creating. Your Mom was tired, but now she is at peace. She instilled in you values that you will pass on to your own children. Keep the faith and walk slowly.

With deepest sympathy,

Mr. & Mrs. Daniel Ackley

Kim Scanlon

February 19, 2001

The first time I met Mrs.Scanlon was Valentines Day several years ago.I always thought "What a nice lady!" The funny thing is I look back and never imagined how she would change my life forever. Mrs.Scanlon is the woman who gave birth to the man who has changed my life,Jack! JACK, I always had a thing for Jack .I never knew how much I would love him and every day its more and more,he makes me happy in so many ways. I sometimes feel all alone because my entire Family is in Florida,Jack always knows how to make things better.Hes the kind of man who says"Book the flight and go!" But then when Im there I miss him and can never stay long! I want to thank the woman that I called "MOM" for the best gift she could ever give, The most loving family for me to call my own they have made me feel like I belong from day one! Mom we Love you and miss you like you would never know!! All my Love Kim

ELISA DUBITSKY

February 16, 2001

Jack, I'm sorry for your loss.

Francis Tremblay

February 16, 2001

The longer I live on this planet the more I see how we are all connected. Sometimes it gives me goosebumps.



When I was younger I had a hard time with faith since there were so many religions, all professing to be the chosen ones. Today I see that contradiction as our attempt to explain that force in our lives which everyone feels but can't explain.



May this grace of God, which has nutured us for eons, be with you today. I believe no one really says goodbye.

erin scanlon

February 16, 2001

My Grandma



My grandma loved nature and she nurtured it very well. When it was baby season she always watched the mother bird feed her babies and teach them to fly. That is just like Grandma being a loving mother to her kids because she used to feed her kids and taught them to walk. My Grandma always made wonderful cross stitches and crochets and they were always beautiful! She also did talented crafts with her grandkids too! Whenever people were over she always made the best food on the planet. When she was in the hospital she knew she was in much pain, but she was still happy about a little girl named Christina who finally got her new lungs, so that makes her very thoughtful.

Last but not least she was a very good Grandma too! When her grandkids were over she would play games with my little brother Ryan and my cousin Shane and she would sometimes teach me how to stitch. These were traits about my loving grandma who I personally miss and her favorite things, but I think that her family was the most important thing ever in her life.

Love, Erin

Scott Scanlon

February 15, 2001

Time to Say Goodbye





On the day Mom went in for her surgery Diane, Jack, Sue and myself were at Mom’s bedside right before her surgery praying that this was not going to be our “time to say goodbye”.

We left the hospital, leaving Mom in the hands of God and the surgeons, and went back to Mom’s house while they went to work. While I was there I wanted to find this beautiful song that my Mother really loved. I found the tape still in the cassette player. I remember setting up the tape for her so she could listen to the song and it would rewind back to the beginning of the song so she could press play and hear it again. I knew before hand that this song was going to be a symbol that would always remind me of Mom but I didn’t realize how strong the meaning was going to be so I pressed the play button and we listened to the song. After listening to it Diane, Sue and I were sort of speechless. I popped the tape out of the player, I had to know what the name of the song was. It was called “ TIME TO SAY GOODBYE”. We finally spoke and Sue or Diane said “ I hope that means we’re saying goodbye to her infected lung and not to Mom”. Which, at that time, was the case. We went back to the hospital and met the surgeon and said Mom did very well in surgery.

Today, looking back, I realize that It was my Mother’s “ Time to Say Goodbye” to the life she once had. She would no longer return to her loving home of forty-three years, where she created a wonderful life for my Father, brother and sisters. I wonder if she knew this. The past couple of days we’ve spent some time at Mom’s house and as I look around there seems to be nothing unfinished. No unclean rooms or dishes left out that she could get to the next day. No open magazines or books that she may have just been reading not even her needle work that she loved to do while sitting at her dining room table watching her favorite television shows. Nothing out of place and everything in order which is really no surprise because that’s how Mom lived her life.

And now it is our “Time to Say Goodbye” and not just to Mom. I feel like I’m letting go of more than just her life, but an era of the term housewife. I don’t want to say that Mom didn’t work let me just say that she didn’t earn a paycheck for what she did, and if there was a paid position for what Mom did she would be the CEO and President of Domestic Engineers Inc. She did her job so well, I wish I could duplicate even part of the life she created for us. There was always a tidy house, clean folded and ironed clothes she would even iron my father’s handkerchiefs, always food in the refrigerator and a meal on the table at 6:00 P.M. and God help you if you were late. At the time I know I did not understand how difficult her job was, but now I can appreciate all that she did for us. Having a family of my own I know just how difficult it is just to think of a different meal for each night. My kids hear the can opener and they know dinner will be ready in a few minutes when they microwave beeps. My most treasured memory of growing up isn’t a favorite vacation place or a new toy or bicycle that I got, it is the time my family spent around the dinner table. We didn’t just eat and leave the table to do other things. After the plates were cleared Mom made coffee for Dad and her and usually had a dessert for us. We would stay at the table and play games or watch whatever game show that was on or play records or something, but that was our family time, the time I treasure most.

From this day forward whenever I play this song I’ll think of you Mom, and all the wonderful memories of you, and thank you and Dad for the values you have given me to become the person I am today.

It is “Time to Say Goodbye”, and I know I’m only saying goodbye to the physical part of you because I will always have you in my heart.

I Love You,

Scott

Jeff Horrocks

February 15, 2001

Although I didn't know her as well or for as long as I would have liked to, Doreen welcomed me into her family with a smile and open arms. She even let me call her "Ma". I'm sitting here with tears in my eyes thinking about Monday, But I still have to smile and shake my head because I know her final thoughts were only of her children.

My thoughts are with you all. Wish I could be there.

Clare and Michael Nulty

February 15, 2001

Sue, Our deepest sympathy to you and Shane, have faith. Sincere regards, Clare, Micky, Jimmy and Nicole

Christopher Terenzi

February 15, 2001

When I think of your mom I am always reminded of our high school days and how giving and caring she was. The times we may have stayed out past our 9 PM curfew, or had a fender bender on the way to the library to study, mom was always there without a negative word. I am sadden that she is no longer with us, but I know she is in a better place. I will miss her

Robert and Cindy Capwell

February 15, 2001

We ask why did this have to be?

Blessings come in many ways that sometimes we can't see.

What seems a mystery today,

we will understand at sometime, someplace.

Our prayers are with you to give strength and peace. Our hearts go out to you, family and friends.

Sue Conlon

February 14, 2001

An Amazing Woman



My Mom died as she lived her life

Caring for her children and

Sparing us strife

Saving us from a decision

That would cause us grief

And as hard as it was to watch her die

She gave us relief

Amazing is the word

I heard people say

To be so tough

As her body faded away

She didn't cry

Or moan or complain

Even though she was

In so much pain

But even she had her limits

and couldn't stay so tough

She told me the day before

That she'd had enough

I picture my Dad

Taking her hand

And walking her to

A place so grand

No stopping to catch her breath

Or needing Air

Just strolling along

Without a care

Enjoying the freedom

From a body that was worn

And feeling once more

Like she has just been born

Kimberly Edgar

February 14, 2001

Being the first grandchild I have lots of beautiful memories of my grandmother. I am not attending the funeral because I want to remember her alive and loving life with her family. The one thing I remember most is playing gin rummy with grandma. The last thing that I remember is her saying "I Love You Kim" and to get a job. My heart goes out to the whole family and I wish I could be there.

Darcy Novick

February 14, 2001

I'm sorry for your loss, my thoughts are with you and your family.

Mr. & Mrs. Tom Hall

February 14, 2001

Our hearts go out to you and Jack

Susan Leahy

February 14, 2001

My thoughts and prayers are with all of you.

Vernon C. Wagner Funeral Home Funeral Homes, Inc.

February 13, 2001

Our thoughts are with the family and friends during this time.

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April 13, 2001

Diane Ennis posted to the memorial.

March 16, 2001

Scott Scanlon posted to the memorial.

March 15, 2001

Patti Capwell posted to the memorial.