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Harry Turner Obituary
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34 Entries
facebook entries
March 22, 2008
FROM FACEBOOK GROUP
Faye Spencer- Ison (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 10:30am on July 19th, 2007
The service on Tuesday was wonderful. You are all fortunate to have each other. Keep your memories close by, they will get you through the hard times.
Leah Ison (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 9:37am on July 19th, 2007
Hey guys. Sorry for the loss of Harry....I know how loved he was by the family. Sorry I didnt make it out to the service....
Adam J. Kumitch (no network) wrote
at 3:40pm on July 17th, 2007
my condolences to the entire family. harry was a wonderful man full of life, and love, for every single one of you. may he rest in piece.
Destiny B (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 1:29pm on July 17th, 2007
Sorry about your Grandpa Kyle, stop over if you need to talk, me and Stephy will be home. If you need anything, call.
Lesley Rogers (Montreal, QC) wrote
at 11:41am on July 17th, 2007
I'm sorry for your loss. He was a sweet man. My thoughts are with you all.
Rosanna Turlione (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 10:31am on July 17th, 2007
Our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Tj Keys (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 10:01am on July 17th, 2007
what can you say about grandpa harry. how can you sum up such a long full life. well i like to think of him as a family man and teacher. he taught us all a lot and showed us how to laugh. i know he will never be far from my thoughts. He gave me my love of wrestling. he taught me to play crib and he showed me how to enjoy camping. But the greatest lesson he ever taught me was unconditional love is not determined by blood, only by your hart, and his was full of love. i hope i can take all the lessons he taught me throw my life to help make me the person he would want me to be. i love you grandpa you will be missed. thank-you.
Dwayne Hoyles (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 9:08pm on July 16th, 2007
Mary-lee, T.J and Family, we are so sorry to hear of your fathers passing. He will always be there for you no matter what. His love is around and will be there forever. You are all in our thoughts and prayers. Anything you need in this time let us know. Remember one thing, when a butterfly lands on you thats his spirit letting you all know hes made it up to heaven. Take care guys.
Dwayne and family
Melody Buntain Whitehead (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 9:02pm on July 13th, 2007
My heart goes out to Grandma Rita and all of the family...I know Grandpa Harry is looking over all of you....
Lacey Kapler (Edmonton, AB) wrote
at 9:32am on July 13th, 2007
my heart goes out to you all from our family....y'all are like family to us
i know uncle harry is in a peaceful and wonderful place...and always in our hearts
if you guys need anything...you know where we are :)
family
March 22, 2008
Your memory is as much alive today as it was a year ago. We all carry you in our hearts. Your humour and laughter is often spoken of during family gatherings. We have celebrated many firsts without you this year but we always feel you looking over our shoulders and smiling. You are in our memories, hearts and moments, every day.
Your loving family
March 22, 2008
March 22, 2008
Love you,
Cory
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March 22, 2008
love you and miss you....
Krista, Arturo, Jaleena
And your other son...
March 22, 2008
Your son
March 22, 2008
Your girls
March 22, 2008
Grandchildren, and great-grandchildren...
March 22, 2008
Thinking about all the other trips to the mountains.
March 22, 2008
"I don't want to play anymore."
March 22, 2008
Last trip to Jasper (Thank you Thomas)
March 22, 2008
"It's your turn Mr. Sheep."
March 22, 2008
The love of your life in mountains...
March 22, 2008
The twinkle in your eye! Teasing...
March 22, 2008
Your loving family
March 22, 2008
Your memory is as much alive today as it was a year ago. We all carry you in our hearts. Your humour and laughter is often spoken of during family gatherings. We have celebrated many firsts without you this year but we always feel you looking over our shoulders and smiling. You are in our memories, hearts and moments, every day.
your daughter Cindy-Lou
September 11, 2007
Dad,
I want to thank you for everything you’ve ever done for me and especially for the gift you gave me at the end.
Even though you didn’t set out to nor were you aware of it at the time but those final days spent with you were by far the biggest gift of all. You shared yourself with me, I saw your vulnerability, laughed with you to the end, felt your love and your pain, cried with you and really listened to you when you spoke.
I saw you die with the dignity you wanted dad.
I also saw the man that I am so proud to of had as my dad. I wish I would have told you this more often.
Not everyone would share their final moments and hours with loved ones. For this I thank you and I will treasure those days forever. To have the time to say good-bye to you was a gift.
You also gave me the gift of becoming closer to my mom and my sisters – in those last days we connected at level that is deeper than I could ever imagine us to be.
Thank you.
You will be with me when I walk through the mountains, look up at the sky, feed the birds, stop on the side of the road to watch the sheep and deer. When I take ice cream to grama, wishing you were there to have yours and when I listen to my daughter sing you lullabies at night time.
I love you and I miss you every single day.
Kyle Prokopy
September 9, 2007
Grampa I will always miss you.
Love Kyle
Tery-Lynn
August 9, 2007
I would like to share a few stories with everyone about Harry, the dad.
When our dad started dating our mom he made us girls a part of him immediately. His second date with our mom involved all of us - he took us to a drive-in (our first).
In the beginning our dad would mix our names up - Terry-Lynn, Mary-Lee, and Cindy-Lou - it is a handful. He used to call us #1, #2, and #3. Me being one, of course.
Mom and Dad got married when I was 9, Mary-Lee was 8, and Cindy-Lou was 4. Cindy-Lou was so excited you could hear her in the church asking - can I call him daddy yet?
We had wonderful summer vacations - camping every year in Jasper. We were all allowed to bring a friend. Dad and 7 females! In the mornings we would play follow the leader thru the campground with dad being the leader!
We went to Dair Queen every Sunday, we often went to Hawrelak Park to feed the ducks or down by the river to skip stones and had lots of cribb games. We had lots of great family times!
Dad taught me lots of things, my love of nature, to be honest, to always polish your shoes and to love dancing. There are a few things I regret I did not learn from him. His excellent budgeting and his impeccable table manners (that's the English gentleman).
Dad did not expect a lot of us girls. He was very easy going. The one thing he demanded from us was for us to respect our mother. As teenagers we may have gotten in trouble a few times!
He was much the family man. Even in his passing he brought us much closer together. we love you dad, we miss you and we are glad you are not in pain anymore.
My mom and my sisters and I would like to thank our families and friends for all the support you have given us.
Thanks for all the great memories, dad!
We love you.
Thomas Trofimuk
August 8, 2007
Harry’s eulogy
First, I want to say how honoured I am to have been asked to do this – to be up here talking to you today is humbling. I want to thank you for your trust. I will try not to let you down.
Nothing I say today will sufficiently sum up a human life, certainly not Harry’s life. Words fail, even for a writer. And to speak grief, or sadness, is equally futile.
You live through grieving and it’s hard.
You live through sadness and it’s hard.
You do live through it.
Words, no matter how kind or caring, or understanding, fail. They will never be enough. Each of us will grieve in our own unique way. There is no correct way to grieve. We all need to honour that.
Eulogies are not about getting every single detail. They are about presenting a tribute. They are about praising, honouring a life.
So, I’m going to talk about moments. As a writer, I realize life is only a series of moments. And you’d better damned well pay attention to the moments. Because when you string all the moments together, you’ve got a life.
I want to apologize up front. I’m going to get some of this wrong. Some of you will be shaking your heads and thinking: That’s not how I remember it. That’s not how it happened. That’s okay.
And some of you will be thinking: Why is this bugger not saying anything about the time that Harry ran with the bulls in Pamplona, Spain? Or other important stories. Well, he didn’t actually run with the bulls in Pamplona, that I know of. But the point is, I’m certain I’ll be missing elemental stories about Harry. Good, I want to hear them later on. I look forward to being corrected.
I hope you come up to me after the ceremony today and let me know where I was wrong. Because telling stories about each other is how we live beyond our own deaths – we transcend death by the stories those who we loved tell about us. Telling stories is how we’ll hang onto Harry. It’s how we keep him alive inside us. It’s how we keep him in our hearts. It’s how we don’t forget.
I’d like to start with a moment that happened in those final days when his three girls and Rita were caring for him. Many of us came to say goodbye. Children, grandchildren, great-grandchildren, sons-in-laws…And at the end of a long line of really difficult good-byes, Harry, tears, in his eyes, looked up at Rick and said something along the lines of: “I was a good father.” Like he was surprised at that fact. Like he didn’t actually realize it until that moment.
I know it is not easy to step in and raise children that already exist. But Harry didn’t flinch about taking on a quartet of women in 1962. He married Rita in 1963, and this brings me to another moment:
Imagine the day of the wedding. Harry had insisted that the girls could not call him Daddy. After the wedding ceremony, three-year-old Cindy-Lou is tugging at her mother’s wedding dress; asking: “Can I call him Daddy now?”
And so, Harry became Daddy to three young girls, and husband to Rita. And later on, he also had a son. When Rick lost his father at 21, he came around the house looking for Mary-Lee and he never really left.
There’s an old saying about family….A guy named Johann Schiller once said: “It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.”
If that’s even half true, in 1970, Harry had a son as well as his three girls. Again, this is a story that defines Harry’s open-heartedness, his kindness, his compassion.
But there is a moment a bit farther back in time when Harry first met Rita at a dance. I know Terry-Lynn will likely tell this story a bit later. You’ll hear her version of it. And that’s okay.
You see, Harry called Rita soon after meeting her and asked her out to a drive-in. Now, Rita is thinking: I just met this guy and he wants to go to a drive-in? She said: “I don’t do drive-ins.” Then Harry surprised her. He said: “Gee, That’s too bad; I really thought you and the girls would like to go to a drive-in.” Rita replied: “I’ll be ready in twenty minutes.”
You see? This is a moment that defines. That’s who Harry was.
He came to Canada in 1957. Coming from London, England, where there are no mountains – just tea and really awful food – he came here and fell in love with the mountains. The mountains were one of his favourite places. In fact, Harry and Rita honeymooned at Patricia Lake up at Jasper. Rita tells me that he loved camping, and fishing, and being out in his boat.
There was a time when the Jasper dump was a favourite place for the bears to gather and feed. And it was a great place to see bears for many years. Harry loved to watch the bears. The Jasper dump was a destination for Harry and his girls. I think he liked to watch all animals. I know he was a great bird-watcher. I know the grand-children took him to Hawrelak Park to look at the birds a few times and I know he was happy on those outings. There’s a picture of him on the table taken during one of these trips. That smile on his face is so telling. He’s happy and he’s proud.
Last year, when we took Harry up to the mountains, it was as hot as it’s been here for the past week. I remember him sitting in his chair, outside, in an undershirt and long pants. (I’ll talk more about Harry’s way of dressing in intense heat in a minute.) But, as the deer and big horn sheep wandered past our cabin, they seemed to linger a bit longer than normal. They just stayed near him for some reason. For a while there, I couldn’t take a picture of Harry without a deer or a sheep, or a bird in it.
It probably wasn’t real comfortable for Harry when we pushed his wheel chair across terrain it wasn’t meant for, on Pyramid Island. He didn’t complain though. He just took it all in. I don’t know if Harry knew that it was his last time in the mountains, or not.
I saw him interact with my daughter, his grand-daughter. I watched him with all his grand-children, and great grand-children. He loved to make kids laugh. All his grand children. He loved to tease – in a good way – in the best way. Mackenzie says he used to make the gummy bears fall like rain. I don’t know exactly what that means but it sounds like fun. I know he was thrilled with all his grandchildren.
I remember coming to Harry and Rita’s house to tell them that we were pregnant with Mackenzie. Rita almost fell down. Harry couldn’t stop smiling.
Harry was an avid, and some would say, an extraordinary cribbage player. He taught all his kids how to play and their rite of passage was that they had to beat Harold Turner. He would never allow anybody to win because they were new to the game, or because they were younger, or even married to him. They had to win on their own merit. He taught the girls, his grand kids, Rick. He’d teach all the girls’ boyfriends.
There were shelves of trophies for darts too. Harry was a great dart player. And he also bowled for a while in the Rosslyn bowling league.
Here’ a group of small moments:
? Harry was born in 1923, on St. Patrick’s Day – as Rita puts it, “an Englishman born on the birthday of an Irishman.”
? Harry always carried a hanky. If there was a girl who was crying, Harry was there with his hanky. He was a gentleman with his hanky.
? He was an “ice-man” in England before coming to Canada.
? For years and years, Rita and Harry would go dancing on Saturday nights. The girls say when they danced they floated on the dance floor. They were that good together.
? Rituals are important and Harry had a few: He watched WWF every single Saturday. Ate Campbell’s pea soup while he watched the wrestling, every Saturday afternoon. Always loved to watch wrestling. He watched wrestling with all his grand-children.
? He polished his shoes every single Saturday.
? He loved to read westerns.
? He served in the British navy during the second world war. And like so many veterans, he rarely spoke of his experiences in the war. However, he refused to eat macaroni and tomatoes, any kind of macaroni actually, or peanut butter, as these were staples on the ship that he served on in the war.
? He loved licorice all-sorts.
? He also loved those cookies over there on the table.
? His favourite breakfast was fried bacon. He’d leave the grease in the pan, cook eggs, sunny-side up – slimy and runny, then he fried tomatoes in the same pan. Then he’d take white bread and soak up everything in the pan and eat that too. Mary-Lee says he also liked fried kippers. The girls say the kippers smell would waft through the entire neighbourhood. Mercifully, kippers for breakfast was a rare event.
? He worked at Northwest Drugs for most of his life in Canada, retired 20 years ago, and within a year began his 19-year struggle with kidney disease.
Here’s a moment the girls told me about regarding his time at Northwest Drugs. They talked about how the first day of school was one of the best days for them because Harry would take them down there and they would pick out their school supplies for the year.
When the girls got older and married and had kids of their own, they never wanted for diapers. Apparently, when a case of diapers was damaged in the warehouse, it came home with Harry, and his girls would get them, at a substantial discount.
I know I’ve mentioned fishing a couple times. I asked Rick about fishing, about a story that stood out, and he said he remembered a time when he and Harry were up at Baines Lake in a canoe, and they flipped it. Harry, at one end of the canoe cast right, and Rick at the other end, cast left, and over the canoe went. Rick says he tossed his rod – Harry hung on to his. Once in the cold water, they laughed a lot until a neighbour spotted them and came to the rescue – towed them to shore.
Cooking the fish almost immediately was another Harry tradition. Once on shore with a catch, those fish were filleted and in butter in the frying pan in minutes. That’s how he liked it.
The girls also talked about how meticulous Harry was. He did things slowly but he did them right. Whether it was siding a house, or painting, packing the trailer, or planting a garden, he was meticulous. For Harry, if a job was worth doing, it was worth doing right.
He was also meticulous with his cars. Big Blue was a favourite. On holidays, he’d record mileage. He’d calculate gas consumption. Big Blue was his pride and joy, and it was difficult for him to let go of that car. As the dialysis wore him down, he let go slowly, but it was hard thing.
I also heard stories about how Harry always wore a shirt, even on holidays in the most severe heat. There are parts of Harry’s body that never saw sunlight. It could be 40 degrees in the Okanagan and he’d be wearing an undershirt and long pants. Oh, the girls say he rolled his trousers up once and got a terrible sunburn on the tops of his feet. Never did it again.
I’m almost done. I hope I’ve sparked some memories. I hope you’ll tell your own stories about Harry. I know I haven’t gone in order. But nobody remembers in order. I’m pretty sure that all we remember is moments.
I want to invite you to go over to the table and take a look at some of the things he loved, and some of the things he loved to do, and some reminders of things he did because his country called him to duty.
I have to add here, that a few of us in this room, myself included, only knew Harry on Dialysis. I would be remiss to not spend a little time talking about those years and Harry’s struggle.
For many years he was on dialysis at home and so, had a certain degree of freedom. When he started having to go for dialysis, the quality of his life was diminished. Though, he still always had time to play cards with his grandchildren.
The family sometimes, lovingly referred to Harry as the Energizer Bunny:
When he had a stroke, he just kept going.
Constant pain and shifting medications? He kept going.
When he had cancer he just kept going.
Dialysis three times a week? He just kept going.
In the last few years, he’d fall down when a medication wasn’t right, but he would also get back up and keep going.
In the end, he got very tired. Our Energizer Bunny ran out of energy.
He knew that he wanted his wife, and his girls around him. He gathered his four girls together and said good bye. He wanted a degree of dignity and his girls made sure that he got it.
He was a good father. He was a wonderful grandfather, and great-grandfather. He was a fine husband. He was a gentle spirit who floated when he danced, loved nature, and loved children. He will certainly be missed.
For those who don’t know, as a final gift to this world, Harry donated his body to medical science.
Harry passed away at home, with his girls, and Rita close by, on Monday, July 9th, just after nine o’clock.
I was reminded by Harry’s grand-son, TJ, that minutes before, on TV, the Monday night wrestling show had just ended.
Thank you.
Jamie Fleese
August 8, 2007
As we Look Back...
As we look back over time
We find ourselves wondering....
Did we remember to thank you enough
For all you have done for us?
For all the times you were by our sides
To help and support us....
To celebrate out successes
To understand our problems
And accept our defeats?
Or for teaching us by your example,
The value of hard work,
good judgment,
Courage and Integrity?
We wonder if we ever thanked you
For the sacrifices you made.
To let us have the very best?
And for the simple things
Like laughter, smiles and times we shared?
If we have forgotten to show our
Gratitude enough
for all the things you did,
We’re thanking you now.
And we are hoping you knew all along,
How much you meant to us.
Papa Harry or Grandpa Harry as I called him.
Grandpa Harry gave us all the gift of laughter and Love.
Over the last few weeks during and after Grandpa’s passing
we have had some really good laughs
remembering all the great times.
Can you imagine a proper Englishman allowing his Granddaughters to curl his hair and apply lip gloss?
I remember one night when Krista and I should have been sleeping, we crawled across the floor, from our room, through the hallway, into grandpa and grandma’s room.
We thought we were being super sneaky, not making a sound.
Of course they heard us, so Grandpa started kissing Grandma and being all mushy
it worked, this sent Krista and I running and giggling back to bed!
All the Grandchildren remember the ritual of making Tea and bringing it to Grandpa in Bed.
This was our special time with Grandpa,
what a great thing, cookies for breakfast.
Every time we saw Grandpa
he made each of us laugh
and in his memory we will continue to Laugh and Love!
T.J Keys
August 8, 2007
What can you say about grandpa harry. How can you sum up such a long full life. Well I like to think of him as a family man and teacher. He taught us all a lot and showed us how to laugh. I know he will never be far from my thoughts. He gave me my love of wrestling. He taught me to play crib and he showed me how to enjoy camping. But the greatest lesson he ever taught me was unconditional love is not determined by blood, only by your heart, and his was full of love. I hope I can take all the lessons he taught me through my life to help make me the person he would want me to be. I love you grandpa you will be missed. Thank-you.
Bruce and Linda Frashure
July 21, 2007
Dear Rita,
We were at a family reunion in Peterborough when Gail left the message about Harry. We are so sorry for your loss. Gail told me all about the wonderful Memorial.
The picture of Harry is so nice.
You and your family are in our thoughts. Love, Bruce and Linda
Linda and Brian MacLennan
July 18, 2007
With deepest sympathy for the loss of your husband from two of the old friends of the Northwest Drug Company
Tom & Barbara Pelett
July 16, 2007
Just got off the phone, Rita. We're so glad to hear you are having a remembrance. We'll see you in the fall and remember Harry ourselves. We'll be with you and the family in spirit tomorrow with love.
Ann and David Sharuga
July 16, 2007
Sometimes there are no perfect words only thoughtful silence. Our thoughts are with all of you at this time.
Gwyn Wagschal (Hobbins)
July 14, 2007
Harry will be remembered with fond memories. My prayers and sympathy are with those left behind.
Glen Buchanan
July 13, 2007
My thoughts are with you and your family Rita. Your friend always.
Elisabeth Albert
July 13, 2007
My deepest sympathy and love to Rita and family on the loss of your husband, father, and grandfather. My thoughts and prayers are with you right now. God bless you and comfort you. Love, Elisabeth
Cliff and Gayle Cribb
July 12, 2007
Our thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort.
Shane and Nellie Doxtator
July 12, 2007
Our thoughts and Love are with you.
Faye Ison
July 12, 2007
What a wonderful picture of Mr. Turner. Treasure your memories whether they be how fortunate you were to have him enter your lives or as wonderful as it was to bring a smile to his face with the simple delivery of fish and chips or a burger and fries! My family and I pass on our heartfelt condolences to all of you.
Faye Ison
Mary-Lee Keys
July 12, 2007
In My Pocket
I have memories in my pocket.
They rattle among the change.
My memories of you are treasures I carry wherever I go.
They are stored in bits and pieces, parts of a beautiful whole
They give me comfort when I think I am alone.
Yes, I have memories in my pocket, like so much other stuff I keep there.
But of all the treasures I have, it’s the memories of you that are the most precious.
Linda Sorochan
July 12, 2007
With Our Love,
June Collings
Linda, Troy & Michele Sorochan
Donna Collings, Ryan & Kristina Geeraert & Families
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