Thomas P McNelis

Thomas P. McNelis, 76, of Neptune, NJ, passed away peacefully in his sleep at home on October 18, 2025. He was born in Jersey City on May 12, 1949. After attending St. Mary's High School in Jersey City for 3 yrs, his family moved to Carteret and he graduated from Carteret HS, Class of 1967. He attended Rutgers College of Arts and Sciences, Newark, graduating with a BA in Economics. He was honorably discharged from the US Army Reserves in 1977. He is a Lifetime Member of the Knights of Columbus, Carey Council, Carteret, NJ.
In 1971, on a blind date, he met his future wife, Carrie Ann McNelis, while she attended Nursing School in Perth Amboy. They married in 1974 on Staten Island and then returned to live in NJ, first to Cliffwood, then Edison and then bought their 1st home in Middletown in 1977.
Here they raised their 2 children, Matthew, who still resides there and Kirsten who lives in Arlington, VA.
Tom worked for E.R. Squibb in East Brunswick and learned pharmaceuticals and packaging. He left to become a Sales Representative for several different companies, dealing in Machine Sales, Consulting and Engineering Services. Eventually, Tom went out on his own and opened his own company, Kirmatco, Inc. (named for his 2 children). After COVID and working from home, the company became McNelis Enterprises, LLC. He was still working part-time up to the day of his untimely passing.
Tom loved playing basketball and golf as well as endlessly watching both sports on TV ! Over the years, he coached basketball in St. Mary's Middletown, including teaching Matthew his love of the sport. Recently, he took so much pride in continuing to teach his grandson Liam. He volunteered at St Mary's Fair for many years when the children were younger, and assisted his wife Carrie for over 6 years in running the RBC HS Booster Club while his children attended the school.
Tom was preceded in death by his parents, Harry and Loretta (Hanlon) McNelis of PA, and recently in April 2025, his brother Joseph of Howell, NJ.
He is survived by his wife of 51 years, Carrie Ann McNelis, ( nee Vitale), son Matthew T. McNelis and his wife Christina (nee Gorsky), their children Liam and Sienna, his daughter Dr. Kirsten L. McNelis and her partner, Stephen Sinkovich, 2 brothers, John (Ann) and Robert McNelis, 3 sisters: Maryann Fletcher, Patricia Dague (Bill) and Margaret Martin, Godchildren Melissa O'Connell (Simon) and Jason McNelis(Jill) and many nieces, nephews, grand nieces, grand nephews and cousins.
Carrie recalls that she never met anyone who didn't like Tom. He was always a gentleman, eager to lend a hand and nice to everyone he met. There was no one from his past or present who didn't remember her red haired, freckled faced, blue eyed "Leprechaun". After her blind date, after only having seen a black/ white photo from his college yearbook, she told her friends "I think I just fell in love with Opie!"
In lieu of flowers, please make a contribution in Tom's name to Red Bank Catholic HS Booster Club, 112 Broad Street, Red Bank, NJ 07701
Visitation will be held Monday, October 27, 2025, 2:00 pm - 4:00 pm & 7:00 pm - 9:00 pm at John F. Pfleger Funeral Home, 115 Tindall Road, Middletown.
A Funeral Mass will be offered Tuesday, October 28, 2025 at 10:00 AM at Mary Mother of God Church, 19 Cherry Tree Farm Rd., New Monmouth.