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COCONUT CREEK, FL— Thomas Ruffin III, of Coconut Creek, Fla., formerly of Greensboro, N.C., passed away on Thursday, June 21, 2007.
Funeral services are scheduled for 11 a.m. Tuesday, July 10, at Westminster Presbyterian Church, 3906 W. Friendly Ave. in Greensboro.
A memorial service will be held later in July in South Florida.
Tom's extraordinary passion, talent and caring ways will forever be remembered by those he loved and by those who loved him. He deeply loved his twin sons, Hayden and Brendan and was a wonderful father and friend, always being sure to share with them his love for nature and music, as well as his respect for ordinary people.
Tom loved his fiancé, Virginia Kelly, with whom he shared so many special times over the years. Tom's dedication to his father, the late Thomas Ruffin, Jr., will always be remembered. He was a constant source of strength for his mother, Betty Ruffin and his younger brother, Mark Andrews Ruffin. Tom was a gifted tax attorney and his many clients speak lavishly about his professionalism and integrity. Tom had a special affection for those who might be weak or in need, and made certain he personally gave of his time, expertise and money. He cherished the simple things in life and lived without pretense. For 49 years he was an unassuming teacher by example of what it means to be a son, brother, father and friend.
Tom is survived by his two sons, Hayden and Brendan; their mother, Gillian Sayles; his long-time companion and fiancé, Virginia Kelly; his mother, Betty; his brother, Mark; and sister-in-law, Kara; his niece, Gracyn Andrews; and nephew, Thomas Pearce.
The family will receive friends in the Fellowship Hall following the service.
Tommy's family wishes to express the immense love and gratitude we have for Virginia Kelly, who walked with unconditional love beside Tommy on an incredibly long and difficult path.
The family asks that in lieu of flowers, donations be sent to The New Orleans Musicians Fund, P.O. Box 9861, Greensboro, NC 27408.
Offer condolences at www. news-record.com/nr/obits/
This obituary was originally published in the News Record.
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John Cummins
January 4, 2009
I will arise and go now, and go to Innisfree,
And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made:
Nine bean-rows will I have there, a hive for the honey-bee;
And live alone in the bee-loud glade.
Mark Ruffin
September 16, 2008
T,
I need to know you are dancing. Mom is okay. Fresh tears are abundant as are questions only you could ever answer. I love you.
Mark
Maria Baier
September 14, 2008
Dear Tommy, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! We miss you! Although it has been almost 15 years since we have last seen each other, there is not a day that goes by...I think "Be My Dixie Chicken..."
Lots of Love, Cachi
Cachi Baier
September 14, 2008
Dear Tommy, HAPPY BIRTHDAY! We miss you! Although it has been almost 15 years since we have last seen each other, there is not a day that goes by...I think "Be My Dixie Chicken..."
Lots of Love, Cachi
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Bill Spence
September 13, 2008
Tommy Tommy Tommy...
Those of us who knew you understand what unrequited really means. Miss you every day. My hope is that God's grace will let us meet again.
Your buddy, Bill
Gillian
September 9, 2008
Happy Birthday Bumpy...
love
John Cummins
January 4, 2008
"At times I think there are no words but these to tell what's true; and there are no truths outside the Gates of Eden."
Steven Kwartin
September 11, 2007
Tom, I am writing again, to wish you what should have been a great 50th birthday. I want you to know that I hoisted a quality stout in your honor at midnight, and was listening to live music to get me through the darkness. You are still missed dearly by me and so many others. I hope that you have found peace, and good beer, wherever you are now. Love, Steve
Kevin and Lore Hummel
July 31, 2007
Tom was a gifted attorney, but more importantly, an incredibly good soul. Our thoughts and prayers are with his family and all who knew him, as he'll be sorely missed.
Jay Hardin
July 14, 2007
Tom,
Knowing you when I was a young man helped shape my appreciation for things unique.I will miss having the inside track on great music.You will be in my thoughts.
Don and Butch Patterson
July 11, 2007
Dearest Betty and Mark and family, I am deeply saddened by the news of Tommy's death and hope and pray that your faith and the love of family and friends will sustain you at such a sorrowful time. Please know that I would have been there had I not just heard the news today. Don and I send our love to you all. Butch
Eddie Poe
July 10, 2007
Dear Family of Tom Ruffin,
Tom worked with me in Charlotte as a summer law clerk after his second year of law school. We worked together daily for several months during which I came to know, respect and admire a wonderful human being. He was passionate, smart, talented, enthusiastic, humorous, self-deprecating, and an immense amount of fun to be around. He could drive a golf ball incredible distances for a person his size and had a wonderful touch with the putter as well. Of all the summer clerks I have worked with in 33 years of law practice, he was my favorite. A true gentelman always sensitive to the needs of others. We will miss him greatly.
Marian Sherrill
July 10, 2007
Betty, today's memorial service was a true gift. The saxophone, song choices and solist were so moving. Time to laugh and to cry and to connent with old Fisher Park friends on a summer morning.
My thoughts are with you and yours during this time of loss. I'll see you at church.
Mark Powell
July 10, 2007
To Tom's family and loved ones: I roomed with Tom two years in law school and had not spoken with him since graduation. He certainly was a very special person. I have memories of Tom, his brother and many friends who enjoyed spending time with Tom. And yes, he was passionate about his music back then, also. Best wishes.
Mark Hyman
July 8, 2007
Dear Betty, Mark, and family-
I was so sorry to learn through Coach Len Edwards of Tommy's passing-I will always remember our fun and follies playing football at
GDS,his warmth, smile, and wit.I also remember the joy of talking Tarheel sports with him.
May his memory be a blessing to you all.
With love and respect-
Mark Hyman and family
Karen Purdy
July 8, 2007
Tom-I was so glad to meet you in May, and you were so kind and compassionate. You will be in my memory always, and I know you are now at peace.
Guillermo Fernandez-Quincoces
July 6, 2007
To Tom's family and friends: I was fortunate to have met Tom when he was beginning his career as a tax attorney and appreciated his great wit and intellect. Over the years I talked with him several times and he always confirmed my initial thoughts of being not only a great attorney, but a good caring human being as well. My condolences to the family, he will be missed.
Joyce Summers-Apple
July 6, 2007
Dear Mark,family and friends...
My thoughts and prayers are with you. I was not fortunate enough to know Tom very well but I have great
admiration for you, Mark. The wonderful character and spirit that Tom's friends and family speak about,many of us find in you.Know that you will be in our family's thoughts and hearts now and always.
Shirley P. Martin and family
July 6, 2007
Mark, you know we're here for you anyday, anytime. We join so many who love and support you, your Mom, extended family and friends. Although the loss of a loved one can often be perplexing, take comfort in prayer, treasured memories and hopefully, from the wisdom and guidance in the Handbook of Hope.
Caroline and Kyle Young
July 5, 2007
Betty and Mark,
We want to express our sympathy to you and the Ruffin family.
We hope that many happy memories will comfort you at this difficult time.
Ralph Fortune
July 5, 2007
Dear Family of Tom Ruffin,
My prayers reach out to each and everyone of you. My childhood memories are still vivid. God give you the strength and please accept my deepest sympathies.
Ed Cone
July 4, 2007
Tommy, a verse from Robert Hunter that you knew well:
"There is a road, no simple highway
Between the dawn and the dark of night
And if you go no one may follow
That path is for your steps alone"
Thanks for the things you taught me.
Peace.
David Skipp
July 4, 2007
Dear Ginny, family and friends, we lost such a unique individual when Tom left us. He was our encyclopedia of music who introduced us to so many unsung talents, our traveling companion to Cuba, our most trusted counsel, and one of the finest persons ever born. I only hope two things…that he knows how much we all loved him, and that Hayden and Brendan inherited his incredible humanity.
Terry Nutt
July 4, 2007
Betty and Mark,
I want to let you both know how sad I am to hear of the loss of your son and brother, Tommy.
Please know that you are in my thoughts and prayers during this difficult time.
Betsy, Henry and Elisa Skipp
July 4, 2007
Dear family and to all who loved Tom. He will be forever in our hearts, greatly missed and never forgotten. We've raised a glass,shed our tears and sent our prayers. Your spirit lives within and around us. You are much loved. Peace.
Ashley Reckard
July 3, 2007
Dearest Betty,
Please know that my thoughts and prayers are with you- always.
Ashley Brooks Reckard
Kathy Ruffin
July 3, 2007
Please know that our thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Kathy, Robert Galloway, Dabney Elizabeth, Katherine Brown Ruffin
Donna Clark
July 3, 2007
Dearest Ginny, Steve and I want to express our deepest sympathy to you and your loved ones. May all the wonderful memories help substain you at this difficult time. I hope that you feel comfort in knowing Tom is at peace. May his love continue to surround you.
Mumi Peña Lanfranco
July 2, 2007
My thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort.
Cachi Baier
July 1, 2007
Dear Bette and Mark, I have been very saddened by Tom's passing, he was a wonderful man and perhaps the most sensitive man I have ever known...not for this world...I will always remember Tom as the caring person he was...I remember Tom taking me to the Presbyterian church in Greensboro, he knew I loved churches.Bette, he was always a true gentleman and he loved his family...my prayers will always include Tom and your family his children and his fiancee. I do hope you and your family find comfort in this difficult time. Tom was true blue...Tom was Tommy to us all!!!
Love to you all...
Cachi
Jim Flynt
June 30, 2007
Mark,
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your entire family in your loss of such a wonderful brother, son, companion and friend. May God bring you solace, peace and understanding in your hours of grief and pain.
Maury and Shirley Ray
June 30, 2007
We want to express our feelings of sorrow to the entire family. We knew Tom for a short time as his client, but long enough to respect him for his advice always given as a friend as well as our attorney.
Elena Pena
June 30, 2007
To Tom's Family: Our heart feels your loss. He was part of our family for a brief time in California. It was an adventurous time for him and my sister and we shared much with them. Betty, it was lovely to have met you as well. He was a brilliant man. Our prayers are with you and your family. May you find comfort during this difficult time.
Mark Ruffin
June 29, 2007
Tommy's family cannot adequately express the amount of love, admiration and gratitude we have for Virginia Kelly, Tommy's fiance. She walked beside Tommy on an incredibly diffcult and long path. We remained awed by her unconditional love and pray that she finds peace knowing that his wings won't fail him now.
Billy Chamblee
June 29, 2007
Mark & Betty,
I was deeply saddened to hear the news about Tom. Your family has had
to suffer through some difficult times these last few years. There are no words to express how sorry I am at your loss. I know you loved him dearly. May God sustain you and give you what is needed in the days ahead.
Billy & Amy Chamblee
Patrick Rodriguez
June 28, 2007
Tom,
I will miss your kind heart and your thoughtful nature. God bless you my friend.
June 28, 2007
Dear Betty and Mark,
We are all very sorry for your family and will be thinking of you.
Sincerely,
Jimmy Powell
Walter Hart
June 28, 2007
Tom,
I will miss your wit and wisdom. Although our friendship was brief, the memories will remain with me forever. I pray for your loved ones during this difficult time. You are in a better place now and I hope you have found peace.
Steven Kwartin
June 27, 2007
Tom, I miss you already, more than you will ever know. The years that we spent traveling the country, from show to show, our identical sarcastic senses of humor, disdain of what was "in-style", care for those who needed help, willingness to do whatever the other needed, whenever and without question. You were there for me in my most difficult hours, and I only wish that I had been able to be there to help. I have lost my twin, born only two weeks apart. All the memories are just flooding in, and I am crumbling inside. I feel gutted. Ginny, Brenan, Hayden, Betty, Mark, please know that I loved Tom more than any friend that I have ever had. My daughters, my parents, and my Ginny, are all devastated. In the words of Robert Hunter, "Such a long long time to be gone, such a short time to be there." I love you Tom. I'll meet you on the next world, don't be late.
Alan Breslow
June 26, 2007
Tommy:
There are no words to adequately express how much you will be missed. Even though we hadn't seen each other in a number of years and only occasionally talked, our 37 years of friendship always kept us connected. You were one of the most unique people I have ever known, a true "Renaissance Man". You will be sorely missed by everyone whose life you touched. RIP my friend.
rose and mercy yanez
June 26, 2007
Tom was not only a dear and true friend, but was considered part of my family. He will live in our hearts and minds forever. He was a great father, son, brother and friend. Our deepest condolensences to all who new him.
Todd Battles
June 26, 2007
Tom - your kindness, your gracious wit and keen intelligence will be greatly missed. You touched many people and my thoughts and prayers are with you and your family during this sad time for us all. May you finally have found peace.
Daniel Ferraresi
June 26, 2007
Tom, You were the greatest and will be missed by anyone you touched. Condolences go out to all.
Wendy Wetherington
June 26, 2007
On behalf of Judge Arthur Rothenberg and his Staff, our condolences go out to all that loved Tom and all that had the pleasure of knowing him.
Rochelle Guadagno
June 26, 2007
I am so sorry to hear about Tom. I have worked with him for several years and will miss him. My condolences to the family.
MARK THAW
June 26, 2007
TOM U WERE AMONG THE BEST....TO HIS FAMILY AND PARTNERS..MY HEARTFELT CONDOLENCES
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