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William DeGray Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for William DeGray
Lucy (a.k.a Slim)
March 26, 2009
Grandma,
I am sorry for your loss. I will miss him alot.
ROBIN WORRALL
March 8, 2009
MARLENE AND FAMILY
WE ARE VERY SORRY WE COULD NOT MAKE IT THERE FOR YOU AN YOUR FAMILY OURS HEARTS GO OUT FOR YOU BEST WISHES AND TO BILL GOD BLESS AND YOU ARE WITH MY DAD RSVP TO BOTH OF YOU LOVE U BOTH
FRED AND ROBIN WORRALL NELSON
Albert Littlefield
March 8, 2009
Just a minute, I AM getting old. If I don’t write things down, I seem to forget.
I remember that Bill DeGray told me something like that nearly 25 years ago, when I was asking him for his daughter, Rosemary’s hand in marriage, “You are too old!”
Patriarch – Most of you here today are a part of what Bill DeGray considered his family.
? Though not “officially” the Patriarch, he was unofficially ordained by everyone as the gregarious, kindly old gentleman, who could always be counted on to provide the social commentary for the event or gathering.
? His role in this Extended Family was truly “Larger-than-Life.”
Family – Was definitely one of the most important things to Bill DeGray.
? He was proud of his children their accomplishments, their successes, and their work-ethic.
? He was most supportive of his Grandchildren—from trying to solicit free medical advice from Kym; finding out what Kris and Kurt wanted to be when they grew up; encouraging Kasey’s tennis game or encouraging her to write poetry; talking cars and trucks with Alex; teaching Lucy the strategy for Chinese Checkers and Chess; and teaching Ellen how to play (and consistently win) at checkers and how to play poker like a pro.
? He attended just about every grandchild-related event that was possible—from baseball and tennis tournaments, piano and ballet recitals, and many elementary school plays. Always giving the “Well done!” as if his grandchild were the only participant.
? His real enjoyment was sitting around the kitchen table after dinner, with his family gathered around him where the discussions of the “topic du jour” would be stimulating (and often quite loud). Those of us who “just married” into this wonderful family would quietly push our chairs back, sort of blending into the background, as the discussion heated up.
Tradition – In this family, if something is done twice, it is considered “a Tradition.”
? One Christmas the rest of the family decided to do something different and have Prime Rib for Dinner. Not Bill DeGray. He kept his “tradition” intact and had a Turkey TV dinner while the rest of us ate steak. Needless to day, every Christmas since then we have had turkey and haven’t given menu changes another thought.
? The Kinne Reunion in Roscoe New York (every Columbus Day Weekend)—after the reunion, he played Pitch with George and Debbie Kinne, and Gram (who’s place has been taken by Ann) where tales were told and tongues wagged (usually over a couple of Manhattans) – Does this mean that I will have to learn how to play Pitch to fill in? (Those are some pretty big shoes to fill.)
? Grandpa always sat in his same chair at the table. As everyone sat down to eat, and so-and-so wanted to sit here or there—he always said, “In my house, we always sit in the same chair.” After so many years, everywhere we happened to be as a family and the seating arrangements were being decided, all that he would have to say was, “In my house…” and everyone would finish his sentence and add …“but this is NOT your house!”
? He was King of his Castle! This was never more apparent than when he sat for dinner. If something was not on the table, Marlene would always get up and get it (my poor Mother-in-Law has not had a hot meal in over 52 years).
? He was the King of the Television Remote. We often were told that the only stuff on television worth watching were movies with John Wayne, or Jeopardy, or Wheel-of-Fortune. No one ever asked to watch anything else… we just watched what he wanted to watch. I know of only three people for whom he would change channels… Kasey, Lucy, and Ellen.
By-the-Book – Bill DeGray was a “By-the-Book” sort of man. (Many of us wondered, to ourselves, if he had in fact written “The Book” himself.)
? He hunted, drove truck, rode snowmobiles, watched television, went to fairs and sat and sat and sat to watch horse pulling, mowed his lawn, and did just about everything “By-the-Book.” --
? With every new gadget or gizmo that he bought, hours were spent reading the manual and trying to understand it rather than just “going for it.”
? As he tried often to explain to those of us in attendance, all things must be done in order and to be done properly, one just had to read the book first.
? Now we call this being Anal-Retentive—a person with so such attention to detail that the obsession becomes an annoyance to others or Obsessive-Compulsive—someone who is meticulous, perfectionistic, absorbed in a cause, or otherwise fixated on something. For us, we all knew that this is what made him Bill DeGray.
We Remember – The stories that we never tired of hearing…
? Running home from Robert Bartlett School as the 1938 Hurricane whirled around him
? The trouble that he and his two cousins (Bruce Rogers and Fred Bunt) used to get up to as they summered (and worked) on his Uncle Ike’s farm in upstate New York each summer and how they hated being “put in-charge” of watching their little cousin, George Kinne
? How he only played Red River Valley on his accordion in the semi-nude
? How he played the role of Jonathan Brewster (a stage role played by Boris Karloff) as a homicidal gangster enraged by being frequently mistaken for Karloff in the home of two spinster aunts who had taken to murdering lonely old men by poisoning them with a glass of home-made elderberry wine laced with arsenic, strychnine, and "just a pinch" of cyanide—the play, Arsenic and Old Lace
? Sticking lighted pieces of paper into the bathroom keyhole and shouting to his sister Joyce that the house was on fire
? Taking an axe and chopping down the door so that he could get his “good bike” out of the house (it was always parked in the dining room)
? Putting flour and water into his bicycle tires because they couldn’t afford new tires
? With just about every story about “a missed opportunities or a chance not taken” always being prefaced with …but I was just a simple Truck Driver...
Opinions – We all know that Bill DeGray had a great many opinions.
? Though most of you sitting here have not been exposed to as many opinions as those of us in the immediate family.
? With Bill DeGray’s opinions – nothing was held back and no subject was off-limits – The World; Politics; Religion; Organizations; Education; or Family, Friends, and Acquaintances. We have heard these “Opinions” over, and over, and over again.
? We wished that he would have told the whole world, but most of these were “kept in the family.”
Will we miss Bill DeGray? I am sure that most of you assembled here have one or more stories that either directly or indirectly involved Bill DeGray.
? Most of these stories have been told again and again (usually accompanied by much laughter) and I am sure that there are countless stories that have not been told all that often.
? So, for the rest of your lives, I urge you to think of these stories and when you do, either “tell it again” or sit there and smile to yourself and remember.
Missing Bill DeGray? All I have to do is look within my own immediate, small family to see two daughters who were fortunate enough to have a Grandfather who spent a great deal of time with them and with that have left them with some awesome memories…
Will I miss Bill DeGray? Not hardly! My wife, Rosemary, has exactly the same temperament and disposition as her father. So, I will be spending the rest of my days with this reminder of Bill DeGray.
Thank-you!
All our love,
Al (and Rosemary, Lucy, and Ellen)
Michelle Carrara
March 6, 2009
Dear Marlene, Rosemary, and family,
We were very sorry to hear of your loss. Our thoughts and prayers
are with you.
Sincerely,
Melissa Victor
and
Michelle Carrara
Deedee Muse-Bowen
March 5, 2009
Ann and Family
My heart goes out to you. I will always remember your dad, his jokes and great sense of humor.God Bless
Pat Gualandi
March 2, 2009
To the DeGray Family, So very sorry to hear of the passing of your husband, father, grandfather. Keep him close to your heart and you will be able to remember all the good things. In fraternal love, Mike & Pat Gualandi
John & Karen Birdsall
March 2, 2009
Will always remember his friendly attitude and smile. He was a friend to many people. To Marlene and family we extend our sympathies.
Sandy Blackstone Anotnellis
March 2, 2009
Dear Marlene and family
My thoughts and prayers are with you in your time of grief. May your memories bring you comfort. As Bill is watching over all of you at this time.
My first time meeting Bill was when Ann was joining The Rainbow for Girls. Bill was always there to help when he could. As I Joined the Order of the Eastern Star Bill was there to welcome in as a Sister. I will always remember all the wonderful times we had with Bill
Edmund Lipinski
March 2, 2009
To the DeGray Family,
I had the great pleasure of knowing Bill as a brother at Bayview Lodge of Masons where he was loved by all. I also knew him as a truck driver delivering to my small sporting goods business in Lebanon,CT. He was the best driver we ever had, and Yellow Freight was proud of him. He was a true gentleman, and a loyal Masonic Brother. He is truly missed.
Karen Field
March 2, 2009
Dear Marlene and family,
I am sorry to hear of Bill's passing. I am proud to be one of Bill's "Teamster Sisters". He was a fair and dedicated leader during his time as Secretary-Treasurer of Teamsters Local 493 and it was my honor and pleasure to have worked for him during that time. His stories and his humor will be sorely missed.
May you find peace and comfort in the days ahead.
Karen Field, Local 493 Retiree
Earl and Diane Rix
March 2, 2009
To Marlene and Family We send our deepest sympathy to you and your Family.
NORM RIOUX
March 2, 2009
Our sympathy goes out to the DeGray family. There was no Teamster that was more dedicated to his local 493 then BILL. He will be sadly missed by every one that knew him. From every one at the former VIC'S RESTAURANT in Montville, our condolences.
Jackie Beal (formerly Mower)
March 2, 2009
Dear Marlene and family,
Extending sincere sympathy to you at this time. May you find strength, peace and comfort in the treasured memories.
Sincerely,
Jackie Beal
Gary Littlefield
March 2, 2009
To The DeGray Family:
I knew Bill through our association with the Masonic fraternity. When I visited Bayview, he was one brother that always came to mind when I recalled the events of the night. He was a great ritualist. When he visited my lodge, I also enjoyed talking with him. Bill, you have entered a place where pain and suffering shall be no more. God's speed and Rest in Peace, Brother William K DeGray.
Gary A Littlefield PM & Grand Historian
Melissa Calkins
March 2, 2009
Rosemary and Family...
My deepest condolences to you all during this difficult time. May your memories of your times with Bill carry you through the coming days.
Blessings....
Ellie Rix-Greczkowski
March 2, 2009
Aunt Marlene & family,
Our deepest sympathies to all of you ... we know how difficult it is to deal with the emptiness left when a loved one dies. Although gone from this life ... they walk in another filled with wonder we will only know when it is our time. Until then we will have to hold their love and the memories they created for us ... some will make us laugh when we remember the fun and good times ... others will make us cry. Those tears are love ... because of the footprints left on our souls.
One of the first most vivid imprints Uncle Bill made on me was on a summer's day when dad was trying to get the hay into the barn before it was ruined by rain. As luck would have it, Uncle Bill had to make a delivery for Adley which took him right past our farm and realizing our plight stopped and helped us get the hay in the barn just as the first drops of rain began to fall ... saving the hay from ruin!
Uncle Bill always put his family first, friends second and though work was important ... it took it's place in the proper order. He so enjoyed winter snow vacations with his family and hunting trips and telling those left behind of the details of those many trips. He was so proud of his family and you could see the love and joy in his eyes when he would talk about them ...
I remember when my dad brought Brownie (our pony) home from Pa Rix's ... everyone who visited our little farm was made to take a ride on him ... yes, including Uncle Bill and Aunt Marlene!
Your husband, father, grandfather, brother, uncle, friend .... is no longer suffering ... and has left so many wonderful memories. May you find comfort in those memories and in each other's arms during the difficult days ... and remember the love and good times on the good days!
I know in my heart and soul that some day we will all be together again and that our loved ones will be there to meet us.
Love and prayers,
Ellie and Chuck
Joan Weigle
March 2, 2009
My deep sympathy to you, Marlene, and to your family on the death of dear Bill. I was so sorry to see the announcement. He will be greatly missed by many, especially the old Tech gang. Our memories are precious from "Arsenic and Old Lace" to recent reunions of the Class of '47. With much love and prayers for you all as your grieve the loss of his physical presence on earth, Joan Hart Weigle
james fitzgerald
March 2, 2009
sorry to hear of bill's passing.
Bill Starr
March 2, 2009
Diane & I are thinking of you at this time.
lisa Hallisey
March 2, 2009
I am so sorry to hear about your loss,my thoughts and prayers are with you all.
Lisa Hallisey
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