Search by Name

Search by Name

ARLENE KOCHMAN Obituary

KOCHMAN--Arlene Klarfeld, LCSW, 76, passed away suddenly early Friday morning on May, 16, 2014. Beloved wife of Lea Borenheim for 34 years, Mother to son Paul (his wife Patti), daughter Fran, son Tedd (and his wife Randi) and beloved grandmother to Justin, Millie, Adam, Lucy and Noah. Arlene was a practicing social worker for over 40 years. In 1985, after returning from Israel, where she was National Inspector For Family Treatment, Ministry of Labor and Social Affairs, Arlene became involved with SAGE and was Executive Director for twelve years. She was an advocate in the field of Aging and in Gay and Lesbian Aging in New York City and across the country. Her current work was with PATH through Columbia University Mailman School of Public Health at Callen-Lorde Community Health Center. Arlene was also a practicing psychotherapist with her own private practice. Arlene had a passion for the causes she worked for, was always positive and looked to where each experience would take her next. Arlene has affected all our lives. She will be missed dearly by many and will be remembered in our hearts forever.

To plant trees in memory, please visit theĀ Sympathy Store.

Published by New York Times on May 19, 2014.

Memories and Condolences
for ARLENE KOCHMAN

Not sure what to say?





Matt Bessell

May 13, 2025

Always a weaver of compassion, care and connection, Arlene loved her LGBT SAGE elders & made sure youth was on deck to care for and honor them!

Matt Bessell

November 24, 2024

Arlene“s stellar work at SAGE! An angel amongst us inspiring young social workers to friendly visit LGBT elders from Manhattan to Center Moriches! Much missed! Her memory remains a blessing!

Matt Bessell,LCSW

May 13, 2020

Beloved Arlene! An inspiration to generations of social workers! Bless your spirit in Universe!

James Lomax

May 13, 2019

At this 5 year observance of Arlene's passing, her legacy of good work keeps marching on into the future. Her clinical work still bears fruit in the many lives that she impacted. Her organizational work with SAGE continues to shine in that the organization continues to grow and positively impact the lives of older LGBTQ adults.

When I worked with her, our dream was to create affordable housing for older adults is now a reality. Many people are involved, but Arlene started the process which is now a reality. What a great legacy. Jim Lomax

Larry Lincoln

May 28, 2014

Arlene did so much good and helped so many people. Her dedication was an inspiration to all.
Larry Lincoln and Jim Wohl

May 23, 2014

So grateful to have known her, to have been encouraged by her generosity of spirit, uplifted by her humor, and healed by her wisdom.

Helen Ferrulli

Mary Rosas

May 20, 2014

Fran, you are in my heart and I know that your Mother was a blessing in your life.

James Lomax

May 19, 2014

Our thoughts and prayers are with Lea and all of the Kochman family. Arlene was an inspiration to all of us at SAGE. She was Executive Director during a very difficult time, but kept the organization moving forward. She was the best of friends.
With much love,
Jim Lomax and Jeff Allison

Suzanne Newman Marilyn Berkoer

May 19, 2014

We send our healing wishes , our thoughts are with you during this difficult time

May 19, 2014

My sincere sympathies to Family and Friends. May God the Hearer of Prayer bring you comfort during this difficult time-Matthew 5:4

Showing 1 - 11 of 11 results

Make a Donation
in ARLENE KOCHMAN's name

Memorial Events
for ARLENE KOCHMAN

To offer your sympathy during this difficult time, you can now have memorial trees planted in a National Forest in memory of your loved one.

How to support ARLENE's loved ones
Honor a beloved veteran with a special tribute of ā€˜Taps’ at the National WWI Memorial in Washington, D.C.

The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.

Read more
Attending a Funeral: What to Know

You have funeral questions, we have answers.

Read more
Should I Send Sympathy Flowers?

What kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?

Read more
What Should I Write in a Sympathy Card?

We'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.

Read more
Resources to help you cope with loss
Estate Settlement Guide

If you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituaries, grief & privacy: Legacy’s news editor on NPR podcast

Legacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.

Read more
The Five Stages of Grief

They're not a map to follow, but simply a description of what people commonly feel.

Read more
Ways to honor ARLENE KOCHMAN's life and legacy
Obituary Examples

You may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.

Read more
How to Write an Obituary

Need help writing an obituary? Here's a step-by-step guide...

Read more
Obituary Templates – Customizable Examples and Samples

These free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.

Read more
How Do I Write a Eulogy?

Some basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.

Read more