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Stephen Bender Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Stephen Bender
March 16, 2009
hey uncle steve i miss you so much and i wish that you were here with us. i got my tattoo for khai and i no u no who he is even thought you werent here to see him bnut ino u were lookinh down on us a nd u seen him happier than ever. he is up in Heavan with u now so take careof him. i am going in a couple weeks to go git the tattoo for u i got khais already on saturday i love it. mom and eddie r having a hard time with all of this still and so is the whole family. can u keep an eye on my dad hes not doing good and he worries me so much he just got out of the hospital andi cant take losing my dad when i lost u and khai i cant deal with my dad not being here with us. well i love u uncle steve and i will be sure to write u sooner i no i havent wrote in about a year, but i will do it more often. i love u take care of khai for us up there with u.
love elizabeth
Elizabeth
February 26, 2008
hey
i miss u so much. im about to graduate in about 3 months. Theres so much that u are missing. i wish that u were here its not the same with out u. Im still saying that i wish that u could have met chris he just bought a harley its really nice, we'll be carful on it. chris is the best thing that has happe to me and i think maybe that he might propose to me when it ourone year thats may 12. I love u so much a nd i miss u. Ill see u some day but till ten ill keep writing u.
Elizabeth
December 3, 2007
HEY
i wish u were hear its been so boring and u havent met chris, i love this boy so much, you would like him. But everythings been going pretty good, me and jenn are about to graduate this year wishu were hear to see us walk across the stage. Grams been upset since aunt debbie moved to florida i think that she is going to move down there to but then you know that mom cant be away from her so she will to. I really think that i am going to marry this boy he is so great he plays around just like you. The family loves him, but i have to get back to work im at skool writing this.
I love and miss you..
Kim Welch
November 2, 2007
Hey uncle steve,
Well its like 5:30 in the morning and I cant sleep. A lot of things have changed here. Im married now, with 2 kids...well 3 if you include my stepson Corey. But yea..definately different. Josh is almost 3 now, I was pregnant with him when you died. And then there is Billy, my little Angel. He is not even 2 yet.
I think about you all the time still. My wedding was really hard without you there. But I know you and Granddad are watching me, and I hope your proud. Im not a complete angel, but I try!! I think about the time we went to O.C. for the day and ended up staying..I miss you so much, and it still feels like just yesterday that I got the call that you were gone. I still cry all the time. I guess because the last time I saw you we were fighting. And then to have kids, get married, get your own place..I drive now too!!! Its hard doing all this stuff without you here.
Well, I guess I need to go now or Im gonna cry, and I definately dont want to do that right now. I miss you and I love you!!
Kimberly
Jenn
October 21, 2007
I miss u uncle steve 4real things have been crazy i think about u everyday not a day passes i dont sit back and laugh about sumthin u did. I havnt wrote u inawhile but i come out to visit u at least once a week its been crazy. Aunt Kristy is still a big part of my life Diane died and it just was fair she lost both u guys so close 2gether its kinda crazy i just cant wait untill im as high as u are so i can see ur smiling agian
Rebecca Dangerfield
February 24, 2007
Dear Uncle Steve i miss you alot you were my best uncle i wish that you were stil here everybody mises you you were so funy the bely dancing that you used to do i started doing it momy always tels me that it reminds her of you.On Christmas everybody missed you everbody was also crying because you were not there.You are the best person in the world that i new you always new how to cheer a person up when they were down.Well got to go i miss you soo much Love you always Rebecca!!!!!
Cindy Maher
February 20, 2007
Hi Brother,
I think about you and miss you everyday. Its ben over 2 years and I stil fel like I am going backwards. I feel like my whole life is out of control.I know you are in a better place, but how I wish you were still here with us. I play that last day I saw you over and over in my mind. I have learned one thing you left us, and that is just how important my family is to me. I get so scared when I start thinking who wil be next. I don't know how I will go through the pain again. I'm still going through the pain over losing you. Give Dad a hug for me and I will met you both in Heaven one day. It must be beautiful . Like the song says, I can only imagine. I miss you and love you and hopefully I will see you in my dreams.
Love,
Cindy
Yalonda
February 14, 2007
Uncle Steve,
well IDK where to start...2006 was one of the worst years..alot of bad things happened last year...well i wish u were still here because u made life seem fun but now its just not worth living anymore..everyday seems harder and harder...i am about to graduate next year i cannot wait...i miss u so much i think about u all the time..me and jenn laugh sometimes when were together at the things u used to say to us..nd the things u used to do with us..i remember when me, jen, and liz were in elementery school and u used to take us on field trips all the time and we always hjad fun..u always messed with me...but memories like will stay with me forever...I Luv U
londa
Jennifer
December 14, 2006
uncle steve,
What can i say...life is alittle crazy.. Emma is pregnant moms alittle bit upset but i said although its not a great time we make mistakes but God doesnt... i dont no but its been awhile..miss you..i love u so much..Jennifer
Jennifer Bain
May 26, 2006
Uncle Steve,
It's been along time since i've been on here im in school and was thinking about you...Things are not the same with out you there everyone has an empty feeling inside them. I miss you so much mommy says i remind her of you and i know thats a good thing because you always made me laugh! I miss you and so does everyone else.. Aunt Kristy is doing ok she really misses you we talk about you sometimes well g2g Love you Always
elizabeth/ yalonda
February 16, 2006
Dear uncle steve,
we miss u so much everyday. The family is doing ok, but it's so hard to say good-bye to yesterday. Buddy said something a couple days ago about u and i started crying a lot, i had to walk outside for a little while. Everyday it get's harder and harder knowing that your not there anymore and to wake up and never see you again. Jen and I go over aunt kristys house all the time we have a lot of fun, we try to keep her company and give her compfort.
we love you!!!
Love Elizabeth & Londa
Cindy Maher
December 21, 2005
Dear Stephen,
This time of the year is so hard. Today is December 21 and the past month has been especially hard for me. I dreaded your birthday coming. I went with Mom to put flowers out and visit. My heart aches and hurts. I miss you so much, sometimes I feel like I am going backwards. It hurts so much. Christmas is in a few days and my heart just isn't there. I try for the kids, but they are struggling too. Becca is still going to the grief group at school, I think that its helping her. Elizabeth is doing good. She is babysitting triplets and has a boyfriend. He lives up in Hampstead next door to Allen. Buddy is doing good. He is still living with his Dad and I miss him. But , he is doing great in school up there and he has a girlfriend that he really cares about. Her name is Kate. Mom is ok. She seems sad and empty alot. I worry so much about her.
I miss you brother. Merry Christmas.
Oh, when we were out in the mall on a trip, I bought an ornament just for you. Its a nascar and I will have it on our tree every year.
I love you Stephen, Cindy
Yalonda Coley
November 15, 2005
hey Uncle Steve.
been missing you lately and I've been thinking bout u I hope that we will be together again someday we;; gotta go so love ya
londa
Yalonda Coley
November 5, 2005
Hey Uncle Steve,
well like 2 weeks ago Kimbely and BJ got married I know that you would've been proud of her. It felt wierd not being able to see your smiling face filled with laughter in the pews but we know that you were there in spirit. Uncle Steve I really miss you maybe we will be together soon enough.I did really good on on of my test I took thursday well I Love You so much guess I'll talk later Londa
Yalonda Coley
November 4, 2005
Dear Uncle Steve,
I miss you so much I don't know what to do with myself. When I heard what happened I couldn't believe it.I thought I was dreaming, But when you left this world without a warning not even saying goodbye but when u left a small part of me died. I miss u so much I think about u everyday. I dream about u all the time. Sometimes it feels like ur still here. I had a dream one night that
me and u went to a nascar race and u got to meet dale ernheart Jr. and u were the happiest person in the world.and I was happy to.I love U and I just want u to know that and I miss u so much and I know ur happy up there now that ur with your father and I know that both of u guys r watching over all of us.I Love You!!!!!!!!
Londa
Kristy Brashears
October 19, 2005
Dear Steve,
I've tried to write you everyday for the past week and a half. Everytime I'd start, I'd get too upset and stop. I think I'm still waiting for you to come thru the door. Like as if everything is a bad dream, and I just want to wake up. I guess that's just me still not accepting things a year later. Part of me thinks why should I have to accept it, it should have never happened. Another part of me thinks that God has a good reason. Lately I feel that I'm in a state of confusion. I feel like I'm having a hard time making decisions and even thinking. I felt that way a year ago and I guess I was expecting to be moving forward instead of backwards. Again lately I've been feeling really lonely. And I know I've said it a thousand times before, but it's not a loneliness just to have someone there. It's you that's missing. I miss you so much, and I love you with all my heart. One day we will be together again.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
October 11, 2005
Stephen,
Yesterday was such a sad and lonely day for all of us. It was a year ago that you were taken from us, and I am still struggling so much. In my heart I know that you are with God and I know that you are not alone. But, I miss you so much and am still a little angry that He took you from us.
Mom is doing ok. She is the strongest woman I know Stephen. She tries to stay strong for all of us, But I cannot imagine the pain that she endures, you were her youngest son. I cannot imagine her pain, I hurt for her.
The kids are all doing well. Buddy lives with him Dad now, and I miss him everyday. We are still going along slowly with the house.
I talked to Kristy the other day. I told her it is painful for me to see her, but I am going to call her and keep in touch. I love her and I miss her. She just reminds me so much of you, but thats a good thing.
I miss you so much.
Love,
Cindy
Jenn Bain
October 7, 2005
Uncle Steve,
Still till this day i cant understand why you were taken frm us!!! Its not fair i miss you alot. I cant believe its been a year i can still clearly rember that very day. Well keep lookin out 4 us we shore do need you. Goodbye Uncle Steve I will always miss you and love you
Emma Bain
September 29, 2005
Uncle Steve,
I am sorry it has been like forever since I wrote to you. I miss you so much and nothing has been the same without you here. Jen and Aunt Kristy are best friends now. And everytime I am with her I just wanna break down and cry because i see you in her. But anyway, I am in high school now and it sucks. Ok well I am in school g2g
Kristy Brashears
September 21, 2005
Dear Steve,
I've been thinking about you a lot lately. Your family picked out your stone and it's beautiful. In just a few weeks, it will be a year since you've gone. To this day, in my heart I still can't believe it. Things around here are ok. Some days are good and others are just really bad. I'm starting to wonder if it ever gets any easier. I have many doubts and uncertainties about life in general. How can someones life end at 25? I'm so lucky to have you in my life. Tonight, as I write this letter I'm crying again as if it was day one all over. I love you more than anything in this world.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
August 14, 2005
Dear Steve,
I've had a hard time getting myself to write you since Jenn's last letter. She's so right about how it looks on the outside and how it really feels on the inside. She really understands me and knows how I feel. She's been so much more to me than my niece, she's my friend. I know that I tell you time and time again, but we all miss you. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
August 8, 2005
Dear Stephen,
I an sorry that I have not written toy lately. So much has happened here with us. We moved into the house. Its still a mess and we need to do so much.
I miss you brother. Yesterday was so hard in church. I cried during the whole service. Its still so hard here. But, I know that you are happy and at peace. I know that we will see each other soon. I love you and miss you everyday.
Love,
Cynthia
Jenn Bain
August 8, 2005
Dear Uncle Steve,
Its been forever since i wrote in here. I miss you a whole lot things have been crazy everyones moving an stuff i have been working alot and let me tell u tryin to be grown up isnt so easy i geuss its just how it works u no getting older. Well anyway nothing is the same without u i find myself saying uncle steve would love that or something i just know aunt kristy really misses u even though something may look good on the outside u never no how bad someone is hurting on the inside.I miss u alot !
Kristy Brashears
July 27, 2005
Dear Steve,
The last time I wrote you for some reason didn't show up. I wrote to you again on our anniversary, which was one of the longest days of my life. Brandon has been talking so much about you lately. It upsets me to hear him talking about you. And everything he says the last couple of days always reverts back to you. My heart breaks to see him like that, and I know I upset him. He always asks me if I cry and if I miss you. I wish you could be here with me, with us all. I'm still waiting for the reason why God had to take you. I don't know if I'll ever be able to accept any reason. Maybe, I'm just selfish. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
June 27, 2005
Dear Steve,
Today is our anniversary. I think this is probably one of the hardest days ever for me. Last year you sent me flowers, and on the card it read "thank you for the best six years of my life. Looking forward to the next six and many more." We didn't even get a chance to see one more. I remember the first day we met. It was Saturday June 27, 1998. We met at the mall, outside of the Disney store. You were there waiting with a stuffed Mickey Mouse for me. I knew right then and there we were meant for each other. We spent almost every second of our lives toghether from that moment on. I treasured every second of our time together. You gave me the best years of my life and I know it was the same for you. I would tell you happy anniversary, but I'm not happy without you. I'm so empty and alone. I miss you so much and I love you with all my heart and soul.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
June 20, 2005
Dear Stephen,
I know its been such a long time since I wrote. So many things have happened. Mom and I went on a missions trip to the Phillipines for 2 weeks. It was amazing. The people there touched mt heart and I feel like a changed person. I met a boy named D-jay. He is 17 and I fell in love with him. I hope to be able to help him come to America, He calls me Mom.
Also, Eddie and I bought a house. We bought Ms. Betty's old house. I wish you were here. I miss you so much.
Yesterday was Fathers Day and I went to the cemetary. I felt guilty because I couldn't think of anything but you.
I started a seminar last Thursday on grieving. I hope that it helps. Kristy is suppsose to start . I hope she does.
I love you Stephen .
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
June 16, 2005
Dear Steve,
It's been a really long time since I've written. I've moved some things around in the house and I finally have my computer set up in what is now my "office". Brandon's birthday was a couple of days ago. He's seven, he's a big seven. John also finished college. We had a party together for the both of them. It was nice. Brandon and I went to see your mom the other day and he asked about going to Ocean city. He said last year how you guys went on the jet ski and you took him in the hot tub at the hotel. Then he says he misses you. I'm so glad that you left so many good memories for him. I love you so much.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
May 10, 2005
Dear Steve,
It's been a while since I've written, I'm going thru a hard time. I'm lonely, but not just any kind of lonely. It's a loneliness for you. I feel as if I have no purpose. Our lives were so great. Everything was heading in the right direction. We wanted to have a baby this year. You were so excited.
Brandon talks about you all the time. He's really good at baseball. The other day we are in the car and a song comes on and Brandon says this is the song we would listen to when Steve would take me to ride go-carts. Then today he has a nose bleed and mommy tells him to put his head back. He yells and says no, Steve said you're not supposed to put your head back. He misses you so much.
My dad calls me everytime has a feeling about you. Something weird will happen to him and he swears it's you.
Everyone misses you. You had a certain way to touch each and everyone you ever met.
I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
May 1, 2005
Dear Stephen,
I haven't written to you for a few weeks, but you have been in my thoughts and in my heart everyday. Today was a hard day for me. We had church and communion and during the service I had this overwhelming feeling come over me that you were there right next to me. The feeling was so strong that I felt as if it took my breath away. Tears fell and I was thankful to feel you with me. I miss you so much. I still feel like I am going backwards. Its hard for me to just speak your name . My heart breaks wth the sound of your name and the memories that follow. Well, I just wanted you to know that your always with me. I love you.
Love,
Cynthia
Elizabeth
April 26, 2005
Uncle Steve,
I got my report card yesterday and I did not do the greatest. I have had a lot on my mind. I try to do good but some how I wounder off thinking about different things, I was talking about u a few days ago in skool but I dont remember what about. I know that everything is going good up there. Thanx for visiting in my dreams that one felt so real, like I was right there with you and standing there haveing a great conversation which I miss doing so much, this still does not seem right about you not being here with all the family we all miss having you around you were the funny one out of all. Write you later I love you.
Jenn
April 25, 2005
Hey Uncle Steve,
I dont no where to start things just arnt the same anymore!!! Its the last quater in school and well its hard to keep up! I just got my report card and for the first time since ive been in high school i made honor role im so happy i thought i did bad but i did good. Well i havnt seen Aunt Kristy in a while i have been so busy i really like to be with her because it makes me feel better about you. I miss you alot Love Jennifer
Kristy Brashears
April 17, 2005
Dear Steve,
Everyone has moved out. It's quiet here, but I have a lot of work to do to keep me busy. Christina wrote a school report about you and then couldn't read it in class. I read the first paragraph and then couldn't go on. Mommy had surgery the other day. She's doing okay, but in a lot of pain. Brandon is doing well, he started playing baseball. He has practice tomorrow. The dogs are doing good. I wish you were here with me. I feel incomplete. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
rebecca dangerfield
April 5, 2005
dear Uncle Steve,
I miss you very much i love you very much.The letter on the back of my book mark the title is I am free.
Every time i read it,it makes me cry.I remember the phone call when mom called and wanted to talk to daddy all of us were in tears and was not happy.I wish that you could have atleast styed one more day to make us happy for one more day.I miss you very much on your birhtday i struggled so hard to get through
and i am sure every body misses you
its hard to no my uncle who is only 26 and died you were a great one to.All i am trying to say is that i miss you so very much. i love you rebecca dangerfield you are my best uncle steve love you for ever.
Elizabeth
April 5, 2005
uncle steve,
hey how have you been up there. I am doing good, i miss you very much. Everything is going on kims haveing a baby, jenn got a job i am going to fill out an application marks doing a lot better. I finally got my belly button pireced i have been waiting for that but now i want to get my nose pierced. You came in my dream a few weeks ago it was really graet you told me that it was not my time, but it was not yours either. I hope that you have been around like you always were and are just hanging out with the family. Well i will talk to you later come ck in my dreams again soon. I miss and love you much.Oh yeah my B-day is really soon 4/16 i will be 15.Your gift can be to visit me and let everyone no that you are ok and that you are having a good time there with granddad and god. so cya.
Kristy Brashears
April 4, 2005
Dear Steve,
Things are changing around here. Everyone is moving out. This will be the first time that I have ever lived by myself. I wish you were here with me. I'm a little scared, but I think things will be okay. I went to your mom's the other day and had a movie night with the girls. We had a really good time. I've been having trouble sleeping again. I'm up until 2 or 3 in the morning every night. I think I'm going to start reading to make me tired. We'll see how it works. I love you and miss you more than I can say.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
April 4, 2005
Dear Stephen,
Today has been such a hard day for me. If I cried once today I have cried 5 times. I'm not sure if its me or what it is, but I feel like I am shutting people put. I feel lonely all the time and I am in a house full of people. I miss you more and more each day. I am not feeling like things are getting better. I mean sometimes I can kinda talk about you, but usually not without balling. Its so hard. I can only imagine you up there. I hope you kept youe sence of humor. You were rotten.
Well, its late and I should try and go to bed. I love you brother.
Love,
Cynthia
Kim Rose
March 31, 2005
Steve,
I am sitting here at Grams by myself. Everyone is gone either to Florida or Ocean City. Me and BJ are going down tonight for one night.
Things havent been good for me. I always find myself thinking of you one way or another. Expecially being here. Im always expecting you to walk past the windows and come in with your famous "Whats UP!!!" But your not. I have said the same things over and over again. I write in a journal to you everynight. One that no one else will see but me and I guess you too.
BJ is getting ready to get signed with RCA Int. Records. They start recording in a week or two up in Perry Hall. Thats going to be a long 2 weeks or so. Bj working, then going straight there to put stuff down.
I am starting to get really big now. I am 34 wks. and only have 6 wks left to go. I weigh 150 now. I gained almost 10 lbs in 2 weeks!!!!
Well I guess I better get off of here and finish cleaning the house. Everyone comes home tomorrow and Sharon is in OC so Im here to take care of Gracie, and the rest of the animals.
I miss you a lot, and love you so much. I wish so much that you were still here with all of us. But I know that you are better up there. And that you are watching over all of us.
I love you!
Kimmie
Jenn
March 28, 2005
Dear Uncle Steve,
I no i just wrote but i miss you alot. I cant stop thinking i no its selfesh but i wish you were still here. I wish everything stayed the same but it dosnt things change i geuss sometimes not for the better i geuss i just need to grow up and Stop! thinking of the past and just do what im suppose to but what is that? Things are just moving so fast and there is no time to understand why i Hate it!!!! Well im about to go to bed i miss you and please dont stop watching over me !!
Kristy Brashears
March 27, 2005
Dear Steve,
Happy Easter. Today for me seemed like any normal day. There was no pecan nougat eggs or life savers for you. Holiday's just don't seem the same at all. I almost don't even care about any holiday. Things are so different without you here. I feel like I'm grouchy and don't want to be bothered a lot. I don't know why. I don't know if it's a part of depression on grieving or what. I feel like I'm pushing people away. I hope things will get better soon. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Jennifer
March 22, 2005
Dear Uncle Steve,
Well geuss what i got a job. Its not much but its money i havnt stareted yet but i hope i will soon. I wish you were here i miss you so much. Today has been alittle worse that others i have be doing alot of thinking. You no you were really the life of this family latley it seems as if no can laugh or lighten up you no. No one seems right but how can we just pretend like it never happended to make us feel better. I want you to no i
love you and miss you
Cindy Maher
March 21, 2005
Dear Stephen,
Today is the start of another week. All my kids are back at school and Christopher is still so sick. I felt so bad for him.
I had the girls back at the Dr. today. I am trying so hard to get everyone well, since we leave Friday for vacation. Buddy is not going and I am really sad leaving him behind. He just says that he does not want to go.
I am still struggling without you. Becca just came walking out from bed sobbing. She does that almost everynight. They miss you so much Stephen. Elizabeth told me about a dream she had the other night. She died in her dream and went to heaven. She said to me , Mom, I saw Uncle Steve, and he told me it was not time for me yet. Its so hard. I miss you so much. Everyday you are in my thoughts and I wear my necklace everyday. I just like knowing that you are with me. I love you.
Love you always,
Cynthia
Kisty Brashears
March 17, 2005
Dear Steve,
I've been trying to write to you for almost a week now, but I've had such a hard time getting myself together. Every time I tried to write I would have what I call a "bad day" or a "moment". That's what I call it when I have a little breakdown. I talked to your mom the other day and then I talked to Cindy earlier this week and that made me a mess for two days. Everytime I talk to Cindy I get so upset, I try to hold myself together in front of her but it's so hard. You should see how hard it is when Debbie laughs, you guys look so much alike when you laugh. I sold your car today. I needed to, it's just been sitting here. I know I needed to sell it, but it was hard coming home today and not seeing it sit out front. Brandon talks about you all the time. He misses you so much. My mom has to have surgery next month to remove a mass on her rib. The doctors are not sure if it is cancer or not. The dogs are doing really well. I guess everything else is going okay. I read Jenn's entry the other day, and it upsets me to see the kids in pain. That really hurts. I'm going to go for now. I love you with all my heart
Love,
Kristy
Jennifer Bain
March 15, 2005
Dear Uncle Steve,
I havnt wrote on here in awhile i have been so busy . So many good things are happening and i wish so bad that u were here! Things just are not the same you Know. Sometimes i find my self dwelling on it all. I have been spending alot of timew with Aunt Kristy by the way she misses you alot. I lke to spend time with her because it reminds me of you and some how i feel a whole lot better when i spend time with her. Well latley i have been job hunting it is time to start thinking of saving for my first car. So i have been very busy and well you no mommy is actually letting me Surprising isnt it. Well i have to go but i write again soon
Miss you Jennifer
Cindy Maher
March 12, 2005
Dear Stephen,
You have been in my thoughts so much. I miss you more and more each day. It seems so long ago since I saw you at church that morning. Its so hard to remember and think about you, it hurts so much. When we are all together, we are strong as a family, but alone, I fall apart.You know me. I was never any good at handling death, and losing you , well lets just say I am not dealing with it well. I love you, Cynthia
Kristy, I hope you read this. You are not alone in your pain. I know how much you loved my brother,and I know how much he loved you. You are strong, and maybe not today or tomorrow, but one day you and I both will be able to think of him and smile. I love you and miss you. Take care of yourself.
Love,
Cindy
Kim Rose
March 12, 2005
Uncle Steve,
just thought I would check in with everyone real quick. The past 2 days have been a mess for me. Me and BJ were fighting all night the other night because I was so upset. I finally realize why we argue. Im always trying to hide my feelings, when Im upset about you. And it seems like Im just taking everything out on him and not telling him. Eventually the other night I told him that I had been thinking about you, and thats why I was crying. And things settled down. He puts up with a lot from me. I feel bad though because he shouldnt have to.
Well I gotta get off here. Corey is laying down and Im trying to get him to take a nap.
Love you and miss you.
Kimberly
Kim Rose
March 7, 2005
Uncle Steve,
Well it is Monday around 8:30 and Im bored out of my mind so I thought I would write.
Things are so stressful with this wedding and everything else in between. Sometimes I wonder if I am making a mistake, or if the family thinks its all a joke but arent saying anything. They always say BJ reminds them of you. I guess that is a good thing.
I only have 9 wks left until my due date. and Im starting to get really scared. We ordered my girls dresses saturday and then went out to lunch. Grandmom went with us too. and all the aunts since the older girls are in the wedding. Bj wants to start saving money to buy a house after we get married. He got promoted at work and is making good money so lets see what happens.
Well, Im going to get off here now. The baby is laying on the wrong side and it hurts really bad. I love you and miss you with all my heart.
Love,
Kim
Kristy Brashears
March 3, 2005
Dear Steve,
Things are getting really bad again. I feel like I cry so much. I can't stop thinking about you. It's hard to explain, I mean I always think about you, but I'm back to not being able to fully concentrate on anything. I was having a hard time falling asleep at night and now that's not happening anymore. Now, I wake up on and off all night long because I keep dreaming about you. I don't think that I can start to try to heal yet, because I haven't accepted the fact that you were taken away from me. I can't stop thinking about how excited we were about the house. Why is life so unfair? Why did God take you from us? I really don't understand. As much as he may need you, I need you so much more. I have so much more to say tonight, but I can't go on, it hurts so bad. I love you with all my heart and soul.
Love,
Kristy
Kim Rose
March 2, 2005
Stephen,
Sorry its been so long sice I have wrote. Things have been crazy around here. Bj purposed to me the day after Valtentines day. The wedding is going to be Sept. 2nd. And Im already kind of dreading it. I told Bj just to be prepared because I know I will be a mess without you there. Anyways, I got 10 wks left in my pregnancy and Im starting to get really scared. I cry almost everynight. Usually its about you and sometimes its just my hormones going off and me over reacting about something. I honestly thought things were getting better, then last night was terrible. I sat up all night crying. It feels almost worse now, then the night I found out. There is so much good stuff going on, and you are not here. And that just makes it so much harder and not worth doing. I was at my moms this weekend, and I went to church on sunday. That still isnt the same. I cant sit in there without thinking of the day of your viewing. I started to go through some of my stuff I still havent unpacked. Then I got to some of the cards and stuff from my graduation. I didnt think you had signed the big papers out in the lobby that day. But when I looked at it the other day, your name was the only name that stuck out..REAALLY Big...Uncle Steve! I miss you so much and I dont think things will ever be the same without you here. No one could ever take your place and fulfill it the way you did.
I love you, and miss you more and more each day.
Love,
Kim
Cindy Maher
February 26, 2005
Dear Stephen,
A few weeks have passed since I last talked to you. Everything has been so hard for me. I saw where the hospital offers grief counseling. I'm pretty sure I need to do something. I really don't talk to anyone about my feelings.
Are you ready for this one. I am going on a mission trip with mom to the Philippines. I really pray its safe, because I would not make a good prisoner. Mom is excited about it and part of me is excited but most of me is scared. I have never done anything like this before.
We are buying the house. We go to settlement on May 1. I am having the hardest time being excited over it. I keep remembering you and how excited you were that you and Kristy were buying the house. I can still here you asking me, "so, what are you going to get me for a housewarming present!" I miss you so much. Sitting here the tears are falling down my cheeks. I hate that God took you. It was too soon and so unfair. I have really been struggling with God over taking you from us. I love you Stephen.
I miss you everyday,
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
February 25, 2005
Dear Steve,
It snowed today, about 6 inches. We painted the kitchen, and it looks really good. Jenn spent last weekend with me and I think she's staying again this weekend. I really enjoy her company. I finally got around to sending out some of my thank you cards. It was so hard and took me so long. There are no words to express how much I really appreciate everyone for being there for mw. I really miss you. There's not a minute that goes by that I don't think about you. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
February 17, 2005
Dear Steve,
Yet another hard day again today. Brandon had an asthma attack tonight and we had to go to Franklin Square. It was the first time I've been there since everything happened. Renee went with us. She has been so helpful, and so has everyone else. You really know who your true friends are. I miss you and love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
February 14, 2005
Dear Steve,
Happy Valentine's Day! Spending today without you here was very hard. You are my one and only love, my soul mate. I miss you.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
February 10, 2005
Dear Steve,
It's been a while since I've written to you, just so much is going on. I've been staying with Renee for about a week and a half. Uncle Neil moved in and things are so tight and stressful. I think it's been kind of break that I needed to get away anyway. I've decided to sell your car. It hasn't been used and it just sits there. I don't think I need to see it just sitting there everyday anyway. The truth is I haven't even cleaned it out yet, I can't get myself to do it. I think mommy is going to clean it out for me. The kitchen is done at the house, it's so beautiful. The dogs are doing great. Daisy has gotten so much better. Roxy has been doing well although, she had a seizure the other day. I know you loved them, even though Daisy was so honory. I miss you and I am so lonely without you. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
February 7, 2005
Dear Stephen,
Yesterday was the super-bowl and was not the same withoutyou there. I sat there thinking about the year the Ravens went to the superbowl. We had so much fun at Sharon and Chucks house. We all had our hair and faces painted purple. I missed you there. It seems like everything I see or hear reminds me of you.
Everything is going through with the house. May 1 is the day. I think it is good, I just wish that I was happy and excited about it.
I feel like I am ging insane. Everything and everyone is driving me crazy. I don't know, sometimes I just not sure which way I am going.
Well, I am rattling on about myself. I miss you so much. I love you.
Love,
Cynthia
Elizabeth
February 7, 2005
Uncle Stephen,
I miss you so much. Here it is about febuary and you have been gone this long. There is so much that I loved doing with you. You were so fun, we always got along.Now that you have not been here life has not been the same at all. Well I think about you all the time and dont no what to do when you are not here I try to think that it is not true but it is. I love you and will always miss you .
Cindy Maher
February 4, 2005
Dear Stephen,
I miss you more everyday. I am really struggling with losing you. Talking about you makes me feel terrible. mom was saying how she can sometimes remember you and smile. I can sometime, but not much. I am thinking about going to grief counseling to see if I feel any better.
Well, I just wanted to let you know that you are in my thoughts and heart everyday. I miss you and I love you.
Love ,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
January 26, 2005
Dear Steve,
Things were going well for a couple of days and then right back to the same way I've been feeling, if not worse. I'm still getting cards from people seeing how I'm doing. Each one though comforting, are also very painful. It's like the thin line between love and hate. I love the people and the things they do, but I hate the thought of losing you. I've been having trouble falling asleep at night, I don't if my nerves are bothering me that bad or what it is. If it keeps up I'm going to have to see the doctor. I sit up until 3 in the morning almost every night. I feel like I can't stop thinking about you. I wish my mind would stop, but I just can't. It's not that I want to stop thinking about you, I just can't think about anything else. I have trouble concentrating. I miss you so much. I hope we can all make it thru this together. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
January 20, 2005
Dear Stephen.
This is the fifth letter that I have written you . For some reason they are not showing up in the guest book.
I have really been struggling with losing you. Its almost like I wake up and realize it was not a dream. I wish you were here. It is so unfair.
Mom is really having a hard time. I worry so much about her. She tries to be so strong for all of us, but her heart is broken. I love her so much, and hurts me too see her in pain. We all are hurting, but some of us try to keep it in and not let people know we hurt. Not me, I seem to cry everyday with whomever. I miss you so much.
We are buying Joe's house. I want to be happy and excited, but its so hard.I know that its a good thing that we are doing. I just wish you were here to be a part of all of it. Nothing is the same without you here with us.
Eddie is trying so hard to be part of the family. He has really struggled, not coming from big family. I am also trying to be more patient with him. I pray that we grow stronger together as a family. I love him and I need him . Stephen, he has really had his own hard time with losing you. He really touched my heart. I saw the love that he had for you, his brother-in-law,in his eyes and his heart. It would make you feel good to know too that he loves Mom and wants to be there for her.
Well,I am at work and need to go feed the kids lunch. I have you close to my heart everyday. I love you and miss you Stephen.
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
January 19, 2005
Dear Steve,
I haven't wrote in a few days because I wanted my birthday to pass. That night was really hard for me. Everyone made the day great. We got about 2 inches of snow today, it was really pretty. I love it when it snows. Part of me wishes this pain would subside, and the other part of me feels that I need to feel the pain to realize how real this is. I really miss you and I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Kim Rose
January 16, 2005
Steve,
Well today has been confusing. I dont know why but every song I hear on the radio reminds me of you, or I heard it when I was with you. Like KC and Joe Joe...all my life. They played it twice today and I cried both times because I knew you liked that song a lot.
I still wish everything was a dream and you werent really gone. I dont know how anyone does it. I guess its a little harder for me because Im pregnant and more emotional right now. But I cry atleast twice a day. The littlest things remind me of you. Expecially Bj. He shaved all his facial hair off and now he just reminds me of you sooo much and it hurts just to look at him because I think of you.
Other than that everything is going good. I will be 24 wks along tomorrow and Im starting to show. I feel the baby kick all the time and I just laugh and smile. Im actually kinda happy about the baby. everyone always told me I would be a good mother, Look how I was with Seth. So in a way its a good thing. Im going to start college in the fall for Journalism. Im so excited about it and dont know why. I always hated school.
Well, I just wanted to check in and let you know whats going on. I miss you so much but I know you and grandad watch over me and that I will see you again one day. In a much better place and none of us will ever be apart again.
Love you Stephen and miss you soo much.
Love,
Kim
Kristy Brashears
January 13, 2005
Dear Steve,
Tonight I went to the mall and then to Red Lobster with Renee. We get seated and then before the waitress even asks us what we want to drink, she looks at me and says "where's your husband?" If that doesn't tell you how many people's lifes' you've touched. She said the last time she waited on us was when we had just bought the jet ski and we were studying our books there. The funny part is that they seated us in the same exact seats you and I sat in that time. Things like that just make me miss you even more. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Kim Rose
January 10, 2005
Steve,
Today has not been a good day at all, expecailly not tonight. You are on my mind so much these past few days and all I do is lock myself away and cry.
I hate everyone right now and wish you were here to help me and to talk to me. For some reason you were always the only one that understood me and now Im lost without you. Sometimes I still think everything is a dream, but I know its not. It still hurts just as bad as the night we found out and just like aunt kristy, I dont know what to do with myself.
Well I just wanted to drop a little letter real quick, Im going to bed soon and its not even 8:00 yet. I love you!!!
Kimmie
Kristy Brashears
January 9, 2005
Dear Steve,
It's been a few days since I've written. I've actually been sick for a while. I know I keep telling you that time is going by so slow, but it's the truth. And I miss you more and more as the days go by. Well, I just wanted to drop you a quick line before I went to bed. I love you and I miss you.
Love,
Kristy
kim rose
January 6, 2005
Steve,
Its thursday around 4:00 and I just got back from the doctors a little while ago. They kept trying to get the babys heart beat and everytime the got it, he would move. I laughed the whole time.
Im really sick right now. Ive been coughing for like almost a week now and I can barely sleep at night because I feel like Im suffocating. I dont know how you dealt with having asthma, I dont have it and I feel like someone is choking me.
Well, I just wanted to check in. You have been on my mind a lot these past few days. Bj plays this Metalica song but I dont know the name of it. Its a slow song, and it makes me think of you cause I know you listened to that stuff. I keep thinking about the day of your viewings and how hard it was for everyone. But like usual I hid everything so that I could be there for everyone else. But I only went up to you once. I couldnt do it.
Anyways, I just wanted to say Hi and that I miss you so much. I will write again soon. Love ya steve.
Kimmie
Kristy Brashears
January 3, 2005
Dear Steve,
Both my mom and Renee mentioned my birthday today which of course upset me. Honestly, I wasn't even thinking about it and I guess I kind of didn't want to think about it. The way things are going lately, I have no doubt that it will be one of "those days". I know it has only been a few months since everything is happened, but without you here, it has felt like an eternity. I guess the more I want time to move on, the slower it moves. I'm only hoping for time to move by because everyone says "give it time, it will get better." I feel like saying "When....when will it stop hurting?" I don't think I've ever wanted my time to fly by. When we were together there was never enough time. I wish we had more time together. I don't know what I am ever going to do without you. I miss you and I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Elizabeth Dangerfield
January 2, 2005
Uncle Steve,
I miss you so much, christmas was really hard the family cried and everything was different.I wish that you were here for everything that was going on Kim is having a baby and other things are going on to. I am a little late to say happy Birthday sry and Merry Christmas to i am late for everything, Well I love you and miss you a lot. I love you and miss you.
Love Elizabeth
Kristy Brashears
January 1, 2005
Dear Steve,
Happy New Year. Although I cannot say it's too happy. Today was a horrible day. I went out today with my brother and father and of course you are always the topic. We laughed, and then I came home and cried. The pain today is almost as bad as day one. I'm actually sitting here sobbing writing this. Sorry this is short but it's so bad today. I love you so so much.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
January 1, 2005
Dear Stephen,
Today was New Years Day and it was not the same. In my mind and heart I was saying goodbye to such a sad year. I still am having a hard time accepting that you are gone. I look around and everyone seems to be trying to get on with life. I am really struggling.
Kristy came over for a little while today. I love her Stephen and want to see her, but it is so hard. When I see her, it makes me miss you all that much more.
She was wearing a necklace that her Dad had made for her. Their is a picture of you on a heart. I cried when she showed me. I miss you so much.
I will talk to you again soon. I love you and miss you everyday.
Love,
Cindy
Cindy Maher
January 1, 2005
Dear Stephen,
Happy New Year. We were all together at Mom's and we missed you so much. Nothing is the same without you here. Bill and Carol were here this week. It was so nice having him home but, they go home tomorrow. It will be hard to say goodbye to him. Well, I just needed to to talk to you and to let you know that I love you and miss you so much. Good night Stephen,
Love,
Cindy
Kim Rose
December 30, 2004
Well, I got my sonogram done yesterday. ITS A BOY!! God I wish you would be here to see this one. I am naming him Isiah William. After Grandad and Bj. I was upset because I was really counting on my little girl. But maybe that will happen next time around. Which will be atleast 5 yrs from now.lol
Well, I just wanted to keep you updated. I know you already knew, even before I did but I guess everyone else can know now.
Tell grandad he is going to have a GREAT GRANDSON.
Love ya stev, and miss you so much.
Love,
Kim
Kristy Brashears
December 29, 2004
Dear Steve,
Not much is going on lately. Christmas is over and new year's is this weekend. I can't wait for that to be over. I miss you a little bit more each and every day. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Kim Rose
December 28, 2004
Steve,
I have tried to write a few times, but it never goes through. So Im giving it one more shot and hopefully it works.
Christmas was hard, but I was expecting it to be much worse. Christmas eve didnt feel the same without you at church or at the house to make everyone laugh. But we all did OK I think. We all had our times but we also laughed a lot. Aunt Kristy seems better, she misses you so much. All of us do.
I go tomorrow (wed.) for my sonogram to find out what Im having. I cant wait! I got really upset the other night because I started thinking about how my kid is going to miss out on such a great person. I was a mess. But I guess it will get better in time.
I have to go now, the baby is kicking me and it hurts really bad. I miss you a lot, and love you more than you ever knew.
Love,
Kim aka hooch
Kristy Brashears
December 25, 2004
Dear Steve,
It's about 11:30 Christmas night, and we made it through it. Today was so hard. Your mom thanked me again for taking care of you. I thanked her for bringing you into this world for me. We were meant to be together. My dad got me a necklace with your picture on it. It's so beautiful. I don't think I could have made it through today without our family and friends. I miss you and love you so much.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
December 25, 2004
Dear Stephen,
Merry Christmas. I got on the computer 1:20 this morning and wrote you but. it would not let me complete it. I was so upset. I have tried to make it happy for the kids,but, it didn't work. At one point , myself, Eddie, Elizabeth,and Becca were crying this morning and Buddy was sitting there looking at all of us. My heart is hurting so bad. I miss you so much. I wear you close to my heart everyday. You kmow, I used to think , that would be gross for someone to put ashes in a necklace. But, you know, it is very comforting to me. I really feel like you are with me. I love you.
Love,
Cindy
Kristy Brashears
December 25, 2004
Dear Steve,
Merry Christmas. It's actually almost 3 in the morning Christmas morning. I already feel horrible and I'm expecting it to keep getting worse as the day goes by. I can't wait for everything to be over. I loved it when you used to get so excited to get Brandon that one special gift. It had to top everything and you were so excited when he opened it up. I know you'll be here with us to make it through this tough time. My heart is so empty without you. I can't even put into words how bad it hurts. I miss you and I can't wait for that one day when we will be together forever. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
December 23, 2004
Dear Steve,
Tonight is yet another one of those nights when I can't sleep. All I keep thinking about is Christmas. It was my favorite time of year and I can't wait until it is over. I actually feel like I'm dreading it. Part of me is missing, and I almost feel like I can't function. I miss you so much. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
December 22, 2004
Dear Stephen,
Everything is so hard with you gone. I still have a hard time saying that you died. I know that it is real but I still feel like I am in shock and maybe you will be coming home. Christmas is coming and I just want to stay in bed and let it go by. I miss you so much. I mean ,I know that I did not see you everyday, but I always knew you were there. I find myself thinking about dying a lot lately. I get on here and read yours and also others. Maybe I am becoming a little morbid. I laugh when i say it, but it really isn't funny. I find myself laughing just to keep from crying. Poor Becca is always there for me rubbing my back and saying , It will be ok Mom, then a few minutes later she is in her room crying. She is very private. We are all hurting and missing you.
I love you.
Love,
Cindy
Kristy Brashears
December 19, 2004
Dear Steve,
It's only a few days away from Christmas, and I'm not looking forward to it. It snowed today for the first time this winter. I haven't been to the cemetary since before your birthday, I just can't get myself to go. I don't know why. A few weeks ago I was going about 3 times a week and now I can't even go. Your mom gave me some things to read and I hope it will help some. I know things will get better soon for all of us. I miss you and I love you so much.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
December 16, 2004
Dear Steve,
Happy Birthday. It's no fun to celebrate your birthday without you here. I cried a lot today, and it hurt so bad. Renee and Margaret went out to dinner with me this evening to try and keep my mind off of things. I don't know what I would do without them. I find my myself not knowing what to do without you. You are everything to me. You complete me, and now I don't feel whole. It's so different without you here. Nothing seems the same and there always feels like there is something missing. I miss you more and more as the days go by. I love you with all my heart.
Love,
Kristy
Jennifer
December 16, 2004
Dear Uncle Steve,
Today has been hard.Last night i went to the Hope Lodge with Aunt Kristy. It was a wonderful experience. Now i no why you loved it so much.I miss you so much.It's so not fair that your not hear with us.Everyone misses you so much.
Happy Birthday Uncle Steve
Cindy Maher
December 15, 2004
Dear Stephen,
Tomorrow is your birthday, and it is so hard. I remember last year, you came up to me at church, and you were upset with me. You said,"you didn't even call me on my birthday, what's up with forgetting the brother?" Oh Stephen, if I could take it back a hundred times I would. I miss you so much. I miss your funny sence of humor, the closeness we shared as brother and sister, and the love you had for your family. You were always there to lend me a shoulder when I was down. This is so unfair. You should be here with us. I love you Stephen and miss you everyday.
Happy Birthday Brother.
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
December 13, 2004
Dear Steve,
I had a dream about you last night. It was really weird. It was a week before you died and for some odd reason I knew that it was going to happen. I had to make a decision to tell you or not to tell you. It seemed like it lasted forever. I don't know why it happened but it did. Needless to say that was not a good night. We go to the Hope Lodge on Wednesday, it won't be the same without you there. Thursday is your birthday and I'm already really upset over that. I feel like I don't know what to do with myself. The pain is worse than any physical pain ever. I love you so much.
Love,
Kristy
Jenn
December 12, 2004
Dear Uncle Steve,
Nothing to exciting is going on. Life i geuss just isnt the same.Well not for me atleast.Sometimes I just sit and dwell on everything. It hurts really bad. Everyone is sad! I miss you and Love You Jenn
Kristy Brashears
December 11, 2004
Dear Steve,
It's about 3 in the morning and I can't sleep. I can't stop thinking about you. You are always on my mind. I know I've told you before but I miss you more and more everyday. I'm lost without you. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Kristy Brashears
December 7, 2004
Dear Steve,
Nothing is really happening lately to tell you about. The reason I'm writing tonight is because I can't stop thinking about you. It hurts so bad. It just seems to be getting worse and worse. I feel like I don't know what to do with myself. I try to occupy all of my time but that doesn't even seem to be helping lately. I know in my heart that you are in a better place, but I need you. I love you and I miss you.
Love,
Kristy
Elizabeth Dangerfield
December 6, 2004
Uncle Stephen,
Hey I really dont know what to say anymore but I miss you so much.There has not really been any days that I have not thought of you.Every day it is the same about thinking of you.I am going to miss you on Christmas so much.A few days ago I almost bought something for you but then i stoped and remembered that you were not here with us anymore only in our hearts.Well I willbe going now but I love you so much.
Love Elizabeth
Rebecca Dangerfield
December 6, 2004
Dear Uncle Steve,
You were the best man in the world.
we all love you very much but as much as it hurts me to sit here and write a letter to you it hurts.We will all miss you at all of the holidays when I think of you not going to be at anyones birthday or annovershrey.The day of the funarul grandmom said you no that you uncle steve would be saying you guise look good.Iwill miss you very much and i am sure you see what i am wriyting rite now i love you very much. love you rebecca
Cindy Maher
December 6, 2004
Stephen,
Today is mine and Eddie's anniversary and the only thing I can do is cry. I remember holding your arm so tightly and you saying to me, "I love you sis." You and I both cried as we thought of Dad, but I was proud and honored to have you walk me down. I miss you so much. My heart hurts, but I know you are smiling in God,s light. I know in my dream you said to me, "It's beautiful Cin." I can only imagine the radiance and beauty of the heavens. I know that Dad is happy to have his little buddy there with him.
Christmas is coming and it is very hard. I am trying to be strong for mom and the kids , but it hurts so much. I think about you all the time.
I read this paper Mom got in the mail from the transplant center. Stephen , I know that you would be honored to know that through your dying , others live. That makes my heart feel warm , but I still sit here in tears writing it.
I love you Stephen.
I miss you.
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
December 5, 2004
Dear Steve,
Christmas is getting closer and closer. I made cookies with Margaret's family yesterday, I had a good time. After that Jenn and I went to the cemetary. It's hard enough when I go by myself but even harder to see her cry. After I left there I was feeling really bad, and when I got home mommy had the tree and decorations up, that made things worse. The house looks so good decorated, but it's not the same without you here with me. I thought that I had gotten over being angry with God, but I realized yesterday that I'm not. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
Jennifer Bain
December 5, 2004
Dear Uncle Steve,
Friday i stayed with AuntKristy. We had fun but everything just reminded me of you.I really miss you and the Holidays are rapedtly approching and all i can do is think of you. Your b ~day is coming! Well i was just thinking about you so i thought i would fill you in luv ya
~Jenn~
Elizabeth Dangerfield
December 2, 2004
Uncle Stephen,
Hi, I miss you a lot. I dont know what to do anymore now.I was wrapping presents a few nights ago and almost started cry because I started to think of you.Its been really hard for everyone in this family.Christmas is going to be really hard.Your B-day is coming soon you will be 26 I am really excited for you.You meen a lot to me and I hope that you will come in my dreams really soon and stay with the family.I love you.
Love Elizabeth
Kristy Brashears
December 1, 2004
Dear Steve,
Today was a hard day. The funeral home held a memorial service. It was nice, however some of the things that were said really hit home hard. Someone had said something about doing things without your loved one, when for so long you were used to doing them together. That is so much the truth for us, I can't remember the last time we did anything apart. Of course Christmas was mentioned, and I know how difficult Thanksgiving was, so I'm not looking forward to Christmas. You know I love you and miss you.
Love,
Kristy
Jennifer Bain
December 1, 2004
Dear Uncle Steve,
I have yet to come and see your new house but im very excited to.Aunt Kristy has worked very hard in the house. Every day i think about you. We all miss you very much!! I no everday that you watch over me because when ever i get upset i feel conforted by something and i no its you watching over me. As we approch the Holidays i am more and more down. I just hope you no how much i love you and everyday the littlest things remind me of you . I love you very much!!!
Kristy Brashears
November 30, 2004
Cindy,
I really appreciate you guys all coming. I see a piece of Steve in each and every one of you. I'm sure it was hard for you to come over. It's hard for me everyday I come home to our house. He was so excited about our house. People say that things get easier every day, that doesn't seem to be true. I will love you as my sister forever. You were right when you said we'll make it thru this together.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
November 29, 2004
Kristy,
I wanted to send you a letter to tell you that your house was very nice. It was so hard for Mom and I to come . We still sit in shock that Stephen is gone. None of us understand. He was loved by all of us and together we will hep each other.
Love ,Cindy
Kristy Brashears
November 28, 2004
Dear Steve,
Mommy had a house warming party today for us. It was nice. Everyone loved the house. It's still not the same without you here. Mommy had put your picture out today and I didn't notice until everyone had left. I'm not sure if I'm ready for that yet or not. It makes so upset to see you in that picture. We were so happy together. I still just don't understand why. I love you and miss you more and more everyday.
Love,
Kristy
Cindy Maher
November 28, 2004
Dear Stephen,
Thanksgiving was 2 days ago and it was not the same. It has been so hard without you here. Tonight has been especially hard for me. Kristy is having the house open for everyone to come and see. I am really struggling with going over and you not being there. I miss you so much. I know that we didn't spend a lot of time together, but I always knew that you were there for me. We were close and now I have no one to joke around with, we were alike that way.I love you Stephen and I miss you.
Love,
Cynthia
Kristy Brashears
November 25, 2004
Dear Steve,
Happy Thanksgiving. Today's plans are just like normal; our house, my dad's house and then your mom's house. Brandon and I are spending the night at your mom's. I'm sure you miss me as much as I miss you. It's so hard to actually put in words how I feel sometimes, but I know that one day we'll be together again. I love you.
Love,
Kristy
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Honor a beloved veteran with a special tribute of ‘Taps’ at the National WWI Memorial in Washington, D.C.
The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.
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Should I Send Sympathy Flowers?
What kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?
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What Should I Write in a Sympathy Card?
We'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.
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Estate Settlement Guide
If you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.
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Obituaries, grief & privacy: Legacy’s news editor on NPR podcast
Legacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.
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The Five Stages of Grief
They're not a map to follow, but simply a description of what people commonly feel.
Read moreWays to honor Stephen Bender's life and legacy
Obituary Examples
You may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.
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Obituary Templates – Customizable Examples and Samples
These free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.
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How Do I Write a Eulogy?
Some basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.
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