Kenneth Harold Hardtke

Kenneth Harold Hardtke, age 76, was born January 10, 1945, at his grandmother's house in Oconto, Wisconsin, to Harold and Grace Hardtke, one day before Grace turned 20. Raised on his family's dairy farm in Oconto Falls, WI, Ken grew up in a full house that included his grandparents, Daniel and Ida Hardtke, seven sisters, many cousins, and even aunts and uncles who would stay during hard times or when help was needed on the farm. Ken spent a great deal of time shadowing and working with his father and grandfather. They taught him the importance of respecting and learning about the earth, nature, and other people including the local Menominee and Oneida nations. Ken's parents and grandparents also role modeled independence, hard work, integrity, and social awareness. A self-described socialist, Ken believed in giving what you could and taking only what you need, a creed he lived by until his very last days. Ken shared how, when he was a boy, his father insisted that the Black man painting their barn was "sure as hell" going to eat with their family, especially since the young man was doing all the hard work, unlike his white supervisor who had – until Pa got to him – insisted that the man would eat a cold lunch outside. Ken loved to learn, even reading encyclopedias, and was very bright, except for the time he thought it would be a good idea to hide beer in his mother's washing machine. With a thirst for knowledge and a natural and groomed penchant for math, Ken started college after high school but was soon bored. He worked as a milk tester while also studying carpentry and engineering construction before being drafted in 1964. Ken was eventually stationed in Alaska, on the logistical route to Vietnam. He drove large trucks, managed vehicles and their maintenance, had many philosophical conversations about life and war, complained about the army and those who led and used it, and attended NCO school in Fairbanks. "Being a farm-boy I knew how to take care of vehicles, so I moved up pretty fast." He taught others to be good truck drivers because he "could work with them to learn." Ken's time in Alaska reinforced his love for nature and he enjoyed many meandering road trips with his wife during his lifetime, including back to Alaska by car. He also used his army survival training to build real igloos for his kids. The summer before basic training, Ken and a few friends put together hayrides for the "city" kids in Oconto Falls. Being naturally shy, it was a good way for him to meet people, including his future wife of 53 years, Mary Louise Hardtke. "Before long she was riding with me on the tractor." After his service, Ken joined the United Brotherhood of Carpenters in 1967, a life-long affiliation, and started working with his father who had been farming and working construction to support their family. Having learned so much from his father and grandfather, he easily passed the journeyman test. He started dating Mary again and soon knew he was in love. They built each other up, replacing insecurities with respect and pride. They married on December 28, 1969, during a record snowstorm. Because the farm was snowed in, Ken had to ride a snowmobile to the highway. They still have that snowmobile. Ken and Mary were skilled and avid golfers and downhill skiers. Dad enjoyed participating in amateur ski races. They were never competitive with each other nor did Mary ever ask an official to shave time from her race just to rile up Ken. ? Even in skiing, they gave to others, taking many disabled folks skiing for the first time in their lives. Ken worked a variety of construction and millwright jobs, mostly around the paper mills of Green Bay. He became foreman and then general superintendent of all trades. Following in Mary's footsteps, he returned to college as a non-traditional student, earning his Bachelor's degree from UW-Green Bay with an emphasis in Environmental Science at age 47. After "retiring," he taught construction and apprenticeship courses for several campuses in the Wisconsin Technical College System. He was an extraordinarily supportive mentor who often flouted conventional teaching methods to give his students – women, indigenous students, people overcoming judicial or legal issues, those with learning challenges, or those intimidated by math – what they needed to succeed. He called teaching the "greatest paid hobby ever" and recently reflected on his life on the farm, in the army, as a parent, foreman, friend, and educator: "When I look back on my life, I guess I've always been a teacher." Ken always saw the potential in people and was quick to help others, whether they were family, friends, or strangers. He enabled and empowered others. He volunteered extensively at Headwaters Inc, a sheltered workshop in Rhinelander where Mary was Director for 13 years. He adapted machinery that empowered people with disabilities to work more independently or to move into regular employment. He donated his skills and time to several K-12 schools, including mentoring a handful of middle school girls through the design, framing, and construction of a small building, even teaching them how to lay and machine-finish concrete. In 2005, he was awarded the Good Samaritan award by Catholic Charities for his work with and for people with physical and intellectual disabilities. In 2007, he was made an honorary member of the Mole Lake Band of the Lake Superior Chippewa for his work with technical college students and for helping with the construction of a cultural center on the reservation. Although he seemed to have an infinite knowledge of construction and machines, and a wealth of creativity and common sense, Ken admitted he often preferred to do things by himself so he could learn from his mistakes privately. Ken also saw the potential in discarded lumber, metal, motors, fasteners, and such. He often had an idea of what it was going to, or could, be. Sometimes, his collected items waited for the right idea to come, often while Ken was half-asleep or dreaming. When, and if, Ken's material treasure ever got to Alan-the-Scrapper, you knew it had probably served multiple uses. Ken didn't fear disagreements. He used them to push others to think deeply about their beliefs or to question their assumptions, though this wasn't always clear to the people for whom he served as devil's advocate. Independent, stubborn, sometimes crabby, he desired acceptance of people with ADD/ADHD, people who live with anxiety and depression, and people on the spectrum. Ken read newspapers every day of his adult life, usually more than one, though they were probably not the source of the vocabulary he used while working. Although often pessimistic about Republicans, greed, and "pissing matches" around the world, he trusted in person-to-person contact. Even as a young person, he understood that the Cold War was being conducted by governments, not by the Soviet and American peoples. He and Mary traveled to Russia twice, 20 years apart. His two children -- and his five grandchildren (ages 10-17) -- provided him with a great deal of pride and hope for the future. In the last few years, Ken and Mary spent much of their time in Ocean Isle Beach, North Carolina, after buying a fixer-upper property – which he transformed profoundly as he did with all their residences. Most importantly, it's where Ken met his best friend and 'brother from another mother' Ivan Lewis, and Ivan's fiancé Connie. Ken was a supporter of LGBTQ+ rights and anti-racism long before those terms were common. Even weak from treatment, he mustered the strength to disinvite a bigoted NC neighbor from his yard. He was a man far ahead of his time and, hopefully, a sign of what the future will be like. Ken's father died on his farm tractor and Ken wanted to exit in a similar way, doing the things he loved. He worried that the bladder cancer would rob him of his ability to do the things he loved, and it did in a number of ways, because cancer sucks. But Ken adapted. He worked hard when he felt good and even when he felt lousy. When he felt horrible, he simply persevered. Feeling good for Ken meant being on his lawnmower or a tractor, or designing and creating with his hands and tools. Ken described mowing lawn as his kind of therapy, his way to relax. If true, then he had a copious amount of therapy during his life. Ken spent much of the last year cleaning and organizing his garages and finding good homes for his tools, machines, and materials – homes that would see the same kind of potential in them that Ken had. Mary was a constant and unflagging source of support and organization for Ken during his illness. His family was with him during his last days. The wonderful people of Lakeview Hospice & Hospital kept him comfortable. On the day things went downhill for the final time, Ken had planned to visit, jabber with, and thank the nurses and staff at Westfields Clinic who had provided such care, kindness, and generous ears during his many infusions and stories. He didn't make it that day, but his family extends the same sense of gratitude to them. Ken is survived by his wife and life partner Mary; two children and their spouses, Rellen Hardtke & Todd Coleman and Dan & Vicki Hardtke; five grandchildren: Katie, Anika, Alex, Maddy, and Kaia; his sisters Gloria Barth, Judy (& Buddy) Block, Joyce Smies, Connie (& Mark) Hohne, Phyllis (& Gary) Logan, Carol Hardtke, and Joanne Hardtke; his sisters- and brothers-in-law: Nancy Tisch, Shirley Manikowski, Larry (Jackie) Tisch, Dale (Joy) Tisch, Barbara Bonnin, Ron (Erin) Tisch, and Ken (Melissa) Tisch. He was preceded in death by his brothers-in-law David Tisch, Rocky Bonnin, Ron Smies, Carl Manikowski, Lloyd Barth and sister-in-law Chris Tisch. Always believing in the importance and power of education, Ken made prior arrangements to donate himself to the University of Minnesota Anatomy Bequest Program (https://med.umn.edu/research/anatomy-bequest-program) which benefits the education of medical students and researchers. Ken didn't want a funeral and asked that people instead find joy in his life, work, causes, and stories. After a lifetime of enjoying and tolerating Dad, Mom has compromised one more time by agreeing to most of that. Therefore, on Sunday, June 27, a celebration of Ken's unique and generous life will be held at UW-Green Bay's University Union, 2420 Nicolet Drive. Visitors are welcome 1-5pm. A brief program will be held at 2pm. Appetizers and a cash bar will be available. The 2pm program will be livestreamed via zoom: https://zoom.us/j/93768852635?pwd=UnpiTEFPcnlaMHR4OTcwcUp4d2VtQT09 In lieu of flowers, please consider donating to the UWGB Pride Center or to UWGB Multi-Ethnic Student Affairs (MESA). Both work to encourage and support educational achievement for underrepresented and underserved students in Wisconsin. You can give online at uwgb.edu/foundation or mail a check to UW-Green Bay Foundation, 2420 Nicolet Drive, Green Bay, WI 54311-7001. Include a note that you are giving in memory of Ken Hardtke and indicate how you would like to direct your gift (or include their pledge form). Also consider making a blood donation as current supplies are very low. Ken donated gallons of blood during his life. See redcross.org to find a location near you. ****** Additional information for donations: 1. UW-Green Bay Pride Center Checks made to "UW-Green Bay Foundation" can be mailed to: UW-Green Bay Foundation 2420 Nicolet Drive Green Bay, WI 54311-7001 Please include a note indicating that you'd like your gift directed to the UWGB Pride Center and that it is in memory of Ken Hardtke, or complete and include the pledge form that is available here: https://www.uwgb.edu/foundation/giving/give-today/ Donations can also be made online at https://secure.qgiv.com/for/uowgb/restriction/PrideCenterLGBTQOperationsandStudentSupportFund/ 2. UW-Green Bay Multi-Ethnic Student Affairs (MESA) Checks made to "UW-Green Bay Foundation" can be mailed to: UW-Green Bay Foundation 2420 Nicolet Drive Green Bay, WI 54311-7001 Please include a note indicating that you'd like your gift directed to the UWGB MESA Fund and that it is in memory of Ken Hardtke, or complete and include the pledge form that is available here: https://www.uwgb.edu/foundation/giving/give-today/ Donations can also be made online at https://www.uwgb.edu/foundation/giving/give-today/. Select MESA Fund from the drop-down menu. In the Additional Information section, you can indicate that it is in memory of Ken Hardtke. 3. redcross.org lets you search for a donation site by location, days, and times. After making an appointment to donate blood, most people can complete the questionnaire process online in order to save time at the donation site. Blood supplies are usually low during summer months but the pandemic has exacerbated the problem to a level that the Red Cross is calling critical. Unfortunately, FDA rules regarding blood donation -- to which the Red Cross is bound -- still discriminate against some gay, bi, & pan men, a hurt for which we (and the Red Cross) apologize. The Red Cross is currently participating in a study that will hopefully overturn the last piece of the FDA restriction. The Red Cross does recognize and respect gender identity, and supports trans+, queer, asexual donors and donors with intersex conditions. For more information, see https://www.redcrossblood.org/donate-blood/how-to-donate/eligibility-requirements/lgbtq-donors.html ***Above all, know that we are grateful for YOU.***