If we San Franciscans are ever at a loss to thank the Catholic Church, we can indeed feel blessed for it sent us Father Gerald who came to us, came out, and with charm and perseverance forever changed San Francisco.
Born Sep 11, 1924 in Flint, MI as Leonard Carl Wojtkowiak to Julius & Lucille, he was drafted at 18 for WWII Army Air Force. Leaving as a Sergeant in 1946, he became a monk entering Holy Cross Benedictine Abbey in CO, where he taught English, Music & Latin for 21 years semi-cloistered under solemn monastic vows of poverty, chastity & obedience. While there he earned his B.A. in Philosophy from St. Benedict's College in 1950 and then in 1954 was Ordained as Father Gerald Walker, O.S.B. He continued his studies and in 1958 was graduated from Notre Dame with an M.A. In Education.
He left the Abbey and the Cloth in 1967, became Jerry and came out to San Francisco in every way.
In 1969 as Time published its infamous article naming homosexuality as a "pernicious sickness" with "lavender lapels", Jerry was already hard at work here dedicating his new life to freedom and beauty - and he gladly embraced the color. Meeting his beloved partner and artist Barry Swyers in 1973 they transformed a Noe Valley Victorian into a gorgeous incubator of art - A home to resident musicians, composers, designers, voice teachers, and of course Swyer's magnificent works of paper.
After becoming our 74th registered domestic partnership the fight for benefits began. He savored the recent successes in the military and with marriage equality. Jerry took on popes, politicians, journalists- anyone whose vision inspired correction. Nonetheless, no one applauded or thanked like Jerry did. A note typed on his Selectric along with his fabulous purple script under Barry's cover art was a real jewel in a mailbox.
"Without music, life would be a mistake." Retiring from the State (EDD) in the early 80's, his lifelong love of music led him right to his dream job in 1984 as a staff usher at Davies Symphony Hall. Especially dashing when tuxedo-clad, Jerry ushered with radiant glee, charming and befriending patrons, performers & fellow staff. He never retired.
But in April as liver cancer was diagnosed, fellow ushers, neighbors and musicians offered 24 hour hospice so he could die in loving hands at home. Handsome, sharp and charming until the end, Jerry elegantly ushered his own departure calling daily for champagne. Jerry died June 4, 2013, eagerly departing in his 89th year, the same as his beloved mother, Lucille. In addition to Swyers, his partner of 40 years, Jerry is survived by his goddaughter Lily, and his family of dear friends.
To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.
Matthew Carden
July 1, 2013
A decade ago, my boyfriend and I held a two-night series of dinners in my loft in SOMA for Jerry to come and tell the two of us about his life. It was going to be one night, but we extended to two because there was so much to tell. And of course those two nights only gave us the highlights, the major milestones.
Life is full of coincidences which you couldn't put in a novel because they'd seem too contrived. Here's just one involving Jerry. I remember visiting the rural monastery where Jerry had lived in Colorado. I peered into the spartan cells where the monks slept. This was in the 80s after Jerry had left, back when I was trying to live my own straight life in Colorado. A few years later I'd leave for San Francisco myself, and meet him there.
If there was a recipe for forming Jerry, it's a recipe that can no longer be made. Consider just the major baking steps.
First, place dough in a rural monastery for many years.
Second, shift dough to an oven of gradually increasing acceptance of gays, from the 70s til the eve of the DOMA decision.
Who has an oven like that today?
Here's to Jerry, here's to his retirement from the current stage, and here's to the retirement of that oven, which has done its work.
Erika Atkinson
July 1, 2013
to jerry
in my mind your eyes will always gleam
with a leonine glow
. . . now forever pacified
remembered with love
erika
Peggy Houdek
June 29, 2013
Jerry and I met backstage at the SF Opera in 1971 and we have remained dear and special friends since that beginning. We met before Jerry met Barry and I met Dick and our friendship has remained special and strong. Since moving to Massachusetts, we haven't spoken often or seen each as much as we would have liked. But, any contact felt as if the previous one was just yesterday.
After he wrote us of his terrible news, we were able to speak three times during his final weeks with us. I will always cherish my dear friend Jerry. A very special person. Peggy Houdek
Rich Fidler
June 29, 2013
Jerry was a true gentleman in very sense of the word. He influenced me a lot. I think of him often, and will for the rest of my life. Rest in peace my friend.
Henry Maylin
June 28, 2013
He was a favorite usher at SanFranciscoSymphonyHall and a dead ringer for DickVanDyke. I didnt see him much outside of SymphonyHall.BonVoyage,Jerry,Regards from HenryAlert
JJ Hollingsworth
June 28, 2013
Jerry, we will miss your friendly face at Symphony Hall.
Hilda Kissane
June 28, 2013
Would that there were more gentlemen like Jerry in the world. Rest in peace.
Jake Heggie
June 28, 2013
Jerry was a great inspiration, beloved friend & guide. He lived up to his last name and walked absolutely everywhere as long as he could - always ready with a smile, a hug, a laugh. He found joy in every corner of the city - and he found music in every corner of his life. He will always be part of what San Francisco means to me ... Love, Light & Laughter always to Jerry Walker! Rest in peace dear friend.
Patti Wood
June 27, 2013
Jerry was a sweetheart. So sweet, so kind, so dear. I will miss him and his always positive attitude. Rest well Jerry.
Showing 1 - 9 of 9 results
The nightly ceremony in Washington, D.C. will be dedicated in honor of your loved one on the day of your choosing.
Read moreWhat kind of arrangement is appropriate, where should you send it, and when should you send an alternative?
Read moreWe'll help you find the right words to comfort your family member or loved one during this difficult time.
Read moreIf you’re in charge of handling the affairs for a recently deceased loved one, this guide offers a helpful checklist.
Read moreLegacy's Linnea Crowther discusses how families talk about causes of death in the obituaries they write.
Read moreThey're not a map to follow, but simply a description of what people commonly feel.
Read moreYou may find these well-written obituary examples helpful as you write about your own family.
Read moreThese free blank templates make writing an obituary faster and easier.
Read moreSome basic help and starters when you have to write a tribute to someone you love.
Read more