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Peter Carlson Obituary


Old Lyme - Designer Peter F. Carlson, age 70, died unexpectedly at his home in Old Lyme, Aug. 14, 2024. Originally hailing from Boston, Mass., Peter resided in various locations before establishing himself in a drafty but charming barn he imported from New Hampshire and transformed into a remarkable home. While it may lack a sunroom - a feature he often wished he could add - Peter took the absence in stride, always making light of it as he dreamed up plans for a future renovation.

Peter was a paradox. Generally warm and affable, he could occasionally display a short temper and cantankerous disposition. His partner Larry would sometimes refer to him as "Ebenezer," while close friends and helpers playfully called him "My Liege," both nicknames affectionately acknowledging his more challenging traits. Comparisons were drawn on more than one occasion between Peter and Hugh Laurie's titular character on "House, M.D.," as they both shared a sharp intellect and a flair for unconventional problem-solving. Despite this, Peter often took more quickly to humor than he did to anger. Few topics were considered off-limits, and he navigated life's ups and downs with kindness, self-assurance, and an irreverent wit. He found joy in life's simple pleasures - his beloved dog Jack, his garden, Fortuny fabric, and an eclectic collection of small obelisks. He loved simple things from childhood like Lipton Noodle Soup packets and that ghastly New England brown bread sold in a can.

Peter's house was never quiet. He enjoyed the music of Al Green and Aretha Franklin, the thoughtful discourse of NPR and lately, streaming CNN all day long to keep up with the latest political rancor. He loved documentaries about fashion and the luxury homes of Babe Paley, Patti Astor and Elsa Schiaparelli. In stark contrast to this, he also inexplicably enjoyed the TV series "Snapped." He felt kinship with the maximalist designer Tony Duquette and often signed off his elaborate emails, "With love, TONY D." Peter also loved reading obituaries and sharing them in emails to neighbors and colleagues, even going so far as to print and file the ones he thought were particularly good in a dedicated obituaries folder.

However, more than any of these things, he deeply loved his family and his friends. He was especially proud of his partner Larry, who was an esteemed middle school teacher at Friends Seminary in New York for 45 years.

Peter was born in Boston in 1954, but his family eventually settled in Barrington, R.I., where he spent many of his formative years. A life-long music lover, he traveled to Austria as a young member of the Barrington Boys' Choir. He later studied English and the Arts at Connecticut College in New London, from 1972 to 1976, where he participated in the American Dance Festival. In 1974, he also attended the Eugene O'Neill Theater Center. After graduating, Carlson moved to New York, embarking on a professional journey as a struggling young actor, sustaining himself by bartending at the legendary Studio 54 and working as a part-time driver. One unforgettable client was Edie Beale, the iconic performer from Grey Gardens fame, whom he chauffeured to and from Newark during her engagement at Reno Sweeney, a celebrated Greenwich Village cabaret. A transformative moment in Peter's career occurred when he drove a decorator's black Rolls Royce, adorned with custom needlepoint upholstery, leading him to conclude, "This is the way to live." With no formal training and no clientele, he established his first interior design firm, where he ultimately achieved enduring success.

In addition to offices in New York, Carlson maintained close ties to New England and had an interior design office in Stonington in 1978, where he focused on the restoration and decoration of historic properties such as the Deshon-Allyn House at the Lyman Allyn Museum, Lyme Academy of Fine Arts and the Stonington Historical Society, restoring several 18th century and Greek revival houses owned by the society. Peter often lectured on various aspects of design for art associations, museums and libraries in the area.

In the early '80s, Peter was a rising design star in the New York metropolitan area and was a featured designer at several Kips Bay Boys Club Decorator Show houses. Artfully mixing the old and the new, Peter's style was described by Connoisseur magazine in May 1988 as, "neoclassicism strained through surrealism." After founding his firm in New York, Peter married fellow designer Linda Chase in 1992. The couple relocated to Los Angeles, merging their businesses and collaborating on numerous commercial projects, including the offices of Sony, Time Warner, and Disney, as well as residential designs for prominent clients such as Kevin Costner and Jerome Moss. Peter and Linda welcomed a son, Alex, before moving to Connecticut, and subsequently divorcing in 1996.

Throughout his career, Peter remained deeply engaged in the design industry. Frustrated by a dearth of suitable lighting options for his clients, he founded a decorative lighting company in 2001 named CL Sterling and Son. Partnering with a close friend and former client, CL Sterling expanded from its Niantic headquarters to include showrooms in New York, Los Angeles, Japan and Australia. Peter's work garnered recognition in a multitude of esteemed publications, including The New York Times, NY Times Magazine, The New Yorker, Architectural Digest, Connoisseur, Dwell, House Beautiful, Vogue and Interior Design Magazine. His designs can be found today in residential and commercial spaces worldwide.

During his nearly three decades in Lyme, Peter cultivated friendships throughout the community and was renowned for his ability to engage in conversation with nearly anyone. The longevity of his relationships with employees and friends is most easily measured in decades, with many having visited his barn for drinks, dinner, or, on one particularly memorable occasion following a trip to Southeast Asia, a sarong party. His home showcased an impressive collection of works by local artists, and he was finally able to dust off his college-era SAG-AFTRA membership for a minor role he was particularly suited for as an art collector in a film directed by a friend. The film reportedly achieved critical acclaim in Eastern Europe, a fact Peter shared frequently with pride and a wry smile.

Peter was, above all, a steadfast friend to those in need, on more than one occasion giving away the shirt or jacket off his back to someone who needed it more. His kindness, humor, and quick wit will be profoundly missed. He is survived by his son Alex Carlson; his partner Larry Carter; his father's wife Carol Carlson; and many close friends. He is preceded in death by his mother, Martha (Weir); his father, Paul Carlson; and Alex's mother, Linda Chase.

A service will be held at1 p.m. Saturday, Oct. 19, at the First Congregational Church of Old Lyme. All are welcome. Peter was a passionate supporter of numerous charitable causes, including support for Ukraine, the Crosby Fund for Haitian Education, and the ASPCA. The family requests that in lieu of flowers, you consider making a donation to your preferred charity.

To plant trees in memory, please visit the Sympathy Store.

Published by The Day on Oct. 13, 2024.

Memories and Condolences
for Peter Carlson

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Cluster of 50 Memorial Trees

Rhonda and Peter Westeng

Planted Trees

Rhonda Westeng

October 19, 2024

Peter, we only met you a few times but each one will be a great memory for us. Wishing that we had taken you up on your generous offer to visit you in Connecticut. RIP - Rhonda and Peter

Marcus Everard

October 19, 2024

Peter, who I have known for decades was a total baller and should be remembered as such, impossible to be with him and not have fun. We shared many good times in Connecticut, Los Angeles, London, Tokyo and Hong Kong. I have only fond memories (and a number of stories most of which are unrepeatable in polite company) plus many laughs to recall him by but his was a life well lived and my recollections have me smiling. RIP Peter and keep entertaining those that are with you wherever you may be.

Karin Linder

October 18, 2024

New Years Eve 2018
I knew Peter through work & friendship over 30 years.

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Amy Eeman Ghaibeh

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Todd Dyjak

October 17, 2024

I only had the privilege of meeting Peter once. I recall it wasn´t his best day. He was taken quite ill however, he had the will and determination to be present at his son`s wedding despite his condition. I recall carefully picking him up and putting him in the backseat of a car which took him to the hospital. He looked at me, a complete stranger, who surrendered himself to my care for that moment. Words were not needed. I´m dreadfully sorry for the loss.

Single Memorial Tree

Peter Carlson from Todd

Planted Trees

Charles Spada

October 15, 2024

To my wonderful and dear friend Peter, I'm shocked by your passing. Rest in peace dear you.

Kay Unger

October 15, 2024

I am so sorry to hear about Peter's sudden death at such a young age so sad. He lives on in my homes of more than 30 years. Peter was so fantastic to work with he set a standard most other designers I have worked with since have never met. PETER RESPECTED HIS CLIENTS he he included us in the process instead of just showing up. I have never found that kind of relationship since we used to have soo much fun and the out come was so incrdible that I have moved since the apartment we worked on together and yet every peice we built togehr moved with me or to my childrens homes who sere tiny then. My most precious is my brass nozzel collection her found somewhere in Conneticut and each year freinds who know how I love it add to it. Peter I will miss you. xoxoKay

Kat Kampfer

October 13, 2024

To my beloved liege.... I miss you terribly. At the behest of your beloved son I will continue to care for your much loved gardens with your vision always in mind. Love always, Lady Garden Sprite

Denise Moesch

October 13, 2024

Na zdrowie

Connie Beale

October 13, 2024

Peter and I worked together in the late nineties. The words of his obituary are so understanding of his unique personality. A remarkable dinner party at his home in Lyme is seared in my memory. He was truly a talent, warm and funny. I´m sorry to hear of his passing. Condolences to his family.

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