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Lucian Brown Obituary
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Memories and Condolences
for Lucian Brown
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MB
May 11, 2025
Love you so much! Miss you every day! Hoping we can someday be together again on Mother´s Day.
Becca
May 4, 2025
Luciannnn! 14 years ago today, you (Bieber), me, Chloe and Jayjay were all at Hooters.
I can´t believe I haven´t seen you in 14 years. It´s now to the point where you´ve been gone much longer than I got to know you and be around you.
You are so missed.
MB
April 21, 2025
Hope you had a happy Easter wherever you are. Hope you are enjoying a wonderful new life, a life full of joys and free of worries. Love you so much. Miss you every day. It hurts to be separated for so long from my precious boy.
Chloe
March 7, 2025
lulu. i´m turning 35 on Sunday (obvs becca too). i can´t even believe it. i wish you were here. i miss you. i can´t believe it´s been so long. seems like yesterday you were in the backseat of my car saying "lawlzersaurus." oh, i bought a 2022 corolla (i can hear you now - "okay, grandma."). and we moved to FL, can´t remember if i told you. back in july. doin the single mom thing, ya know. well, i gotta get into work, but i miss you and i love you! fly high, lulu my dude.
MB
March 6, 2025
Trying to get your room in order. Many tears. Many memories. You deserved a happier life. You were the most wonderful boy! Love you forever. Miss you every day.
MB
December 25, 2024
Missed you so much today! Thought of you so many times. Christmas will never be the same without you. Love you forever. Miss you every day.
MB
September 17, 2024
Happy Heavenly Birthday! You were so wonderful in so many ways. You were kind and loving, understanding, loyal, and sympathetic. You were so funny. You were never interested in showing off how smart you were, but you liked to use what you knew to help other people. I hope you can see yourself that way now and can enjoy the peace and happiness you deserve. Miss you every day! Love you forever. Hope we can celebrate together again someday.
Chloe
September 10, 2024
guess what! no. you have to guess. fine, i´ll just tell you. i think you´d be super proud of me becauseeeeee 3 years and 3 months in like, 9 days. crazy, isn´t it? and i just started working with my brother in law and i really like it. it´s selling pole barns. .. so, a lot of math. you´d be good at it :) oh, i moved rowan and i to florida. i´m doing the single mom thing. he´s having some trouble at school but we will figure it out. anyway. enough about me. i miss you, my friend. i´m thinking of you today. i hope youre okay, where ever you are, lulu. i gotta believe you are. love you, old friend. until next time! oh, and if i don´t make it back in time - happy birthday, old guy.
MB
September 10, 2024
So sorry your life was too hard and too short. You were the best boy! I pray every day that you are perfectly happy now. I hope someday I will be able to find you waiting peacefully with Earl and Twog. To be together again would surely be heaven. Love you forever. Miss you every day!
MB
August 16, 2024
Please go with PQM on her trip. Watch over her, and share her adventure. Miss you so much. Love you forever!
Chloe
May 14, 2024
It´s true. We were talking about you. We miss you, friend. Sometimes I think of funny jokes and Becca won´t laugh and I´m like "Lulu would´ve laughed for me." I can hear it now and see you in my rearview mirror, (or sitting in that big chair at our old friends house), you sitting in the backseat. And you throw your head back and say "HAAAAAA HA!" and then shake your head to get your hair out of your face, and go back to looking at your phone, and saying "that was a good one." even if it really wasn´t. You always had my back. :) I hope you´re living it up, up there. But I wish you were here. I love you and miss you and think about you all the time! <3 Chloe (your favorite twin, obviously).
Becca
May 13, 2024
Lucian! Chloe and I were talking about you today. We miss you so much.
MB
May 12, 2024
Remembering how wonderful you were. So grateful to have been your mother! Love you forever. Miss you every day.
M
December 25, 2023
Missing you and remembering all the joy you brought to our Christmases together. Hoping every day merry for you now. Love you forever. Miss you every day.
M
September 17, 2023
Happy heavenly birthday. You at 32. Hard to imagine. Hope you are always happy and worry-free now. Miss you so much. Praying to be able to be together again. Love you forever!
Chloe
September 11, 2023
11 years, old friend. And your birthday is coming up. In case I don´t make it back here ... happy birthday up there. Save a seat at your poker game for me, Lulu. Love and miss you!
M
September 10, 2023
Eleven years since I have heard your voice. Still don´t really understand what it means to say that you died. Please let me be able to see you again, hug you again, laugh with you again. I hope that you live in peaceful happiness now. You were the most wonderful boy. Love you forever. Miss you every day. M
M
August 25, 2023
Feeling extra sad about you these days. Hope you are never sad now. Please watch over EJ and VGB. Love you forever. Miss you every day.
Chloe
May 15, 2023
Miss you, LuLu. Cant believe it´s been this long already. I feel like just yesterday we were texting and you had me laughing at your jokes (gosh, you were so ridiculous. in the best way). I still say "lawlzersaurus" because of you. Love you, old friend.
M
May 14, 2023
I think about you and miss you every day. Your arrival made my dearest dream come true. You were the most wonderful boy. Please be happy now. You deserved to be happy. Love you forever!
MB
December 25, 2022
You gave me my happiest Christmas memories! Miss you on Christmas and every day, beloved boy! Hope that you always feel merry now and that we can be together again on Christmas someday. Love you forever!
MB
September 17, 2022
Happy Birthday in heaven! Hoping we can celebrate together again one day. Miss you so much here. Love you forever!
MB
September 10, 2022
So sad without you. So long apart. Ten years! Impossible to imagine living without you here and yet the days unfold. Love you forever! Miss you every day! Please be happy. You deserve to be happy ! Praying every day that we can be together again.
MB
May 8, 2022
I waited for you years ago. You arrived and made my dearest dream come true. Now I wait for you again. I am so sorry that I could not give you what you needed. So sorry. Love you forever. Miss you every day.
Becca
January 4, 2022
I miss you so much Lucian! KP just turned 3. Wish you could meet her but I know you´re looking down on us and you know her. Wish you were here. I think if you often! I can´t believe it will be 10 years this year that I haven´t heard you call me by my nickname or say something silly.
You are the best, LuLu. We love and miss you always.
Please continue to watch over us and your family. We all still need you.
MB
January 2, 2022
Thanks for watching over PQM. I know we were thinking of you as we cried watching the movie yesterday and as we laughed at Futurama last night. So hard to not see you, to not hear your voice, not to be able to hug you. Such a long time without you. So grateful for you and all the help and love I know you still give us. Please be happy and peaceful now. Love you forever. Miss you every day!
Chloe
September 13, 2021
9 years, Lulu. We miss you. How i wish youd gotten to meet rowan. you guys would be joking and playing like crazy. he´d show you all his toys and you´d teach him weird random things, haha. definitely how to play cards, especially poker. i can´t believe we´ve been without you longer than we knew you now. it still hurts. we love you. if i don´t make it back here for your birthday, happy birthday up there. i´ll still be thinking of you, as usual. is it 30 years old? is it?! i can´t do math, i always had you for that. i know your response would be something along the lines of "ew, 30.." hahaha. love you, dearest lulu.
MB
September 10, 2021
Nine years...so long apart! How can there be so much time left after the world ends? I often think about the line from Lodge 49: "Heaven is what should have happened." What should have happened for you was a longer and happier life with a happier ending. I hope you are enjoying the happiest life now. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
May 9, 2021
Always my beloved boy! Miss you every day! Love you forever!
November 26, 2020
Thankful for you today and always. We miss you and remember you with so much love and such sorrow that we are apart. Hoping every day is wonderful for you now, sweetest boy!
September 17, 2020
Happy Birthday, most wonderful of boys! This summer I went through lots of photos of you and rediscovered so many images of how sweet, funny, and beautiful you were. It is still hard to look at pictures of you, but there is so much I want to remember.....Hope you have only happy days now that you are free of this world of troubles and sorrows. Miss you every day. Love you forever.
September 10, 2020
Missing you on this sad anniversary. There will always be a huge void in our lives until we can all be together again. I believe that your kind, loving nature still comforts us from afar. Hope you are enjoying happiness and peace. Love you forever!
December 25, 2019
Merry Christmas, beloved Lucian. This morning as I listened to a sermon asking us to think about how the birth of a child could transform the world, I thought about how you had transformed my world. All the beauty and wonder you brought! ! I often feel that you are still bringing beauty and new understanding into my life. I am so grateful for the gift you have been. Love you forever! Miss you every day! Hope we will enjoy Christmas together again someday.
November 28, 2019
Miss you so much on Thanksgiving. So grateful for you! Please be happy now. Love you forever!
Chloe
November 5, 2019
Hey, lulu. Chloe here.
I miss our talks. I wish you were here because I need you to talk to. You always knew what to say to pull me out of the darkness. You were always 1/4 serious and 3/4 joking around.
Oh how I wish you knew my son. You'd love him. I can see you saying it now, babies? You and Becca have babies?! Haha. Love you and miss you every day, lulu. I hope you've found your happiness.
September 17, 2019
Happy Birthday! Your arrival made our lives so much happier. Miss you so much every day! Love you forever! Hope you know only happiness now.
September 10, 2019
Miss you so much! Too many days apart. Wish I would see you in my dreams. Praying we will be together one day. Love you forever!
May 12, 2019
I had one real dream - to be a mommy. Your arrival made that dream come true. You were a wonderful boy, and you deserved so much more than what life brought you. I am so sorry. Love you forever. Miss you every day!
February 14, 2019
Happy Valentines Day! You brought so much love into my life. Miss you every day! Love you forever. Praying every day that we will be together again some day. Heartbroken without you, most wonderful boy!
Becca
January 6, 2019
I had my baby. Kinsley Parker KP. she's beautiful and I wish you could meet her. I love you and miss you lu-lu
December 25, 2018
Trying to believe you can still be with us somehow on Christmas. You gave me my best Christmas memories. Love you forever. Miss you every day!
November 22, 2018
I say thank you for you every day - and for the ways you are still with us. When I count my blessings, you will always be at the top of the list. Wish so much we could be together. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
October 31, 2018
Many fun Halloween decorations up around the neighborhood. They make me think about how much you loved Halloween. I like to think of times when you were really happy. Wish you and I and PQM could be together this Halloween. Miss you every day but especially today. Love you forever!
October 14, 2018
Yesterday I watched a Netflix series in which one of the characters said, A ghost is guilt. A ghost is regret. A ghost is a wish. I don't think of you as haunting me. You will never be a sinister presence to me, but my guilt and my regrets about you are with me every day. You were always a wish, a wish come true for years. Now a wish again. A wish that I have to keep hoping and praying will become real again some day. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
September 17, 2018
Twenty seven years ago this day was the happiest day of my life thanks to your arrival. Knowing how the story ends makes looking back at the beginning sad. I hope you are always happy now as you always deserved to be. Happy birthday, sweetest boy! Love you forever! Miss you every day!
September 10, 2018
Six years since the saddest day. Have missed you every day and prayed every day that one day we can be together again. You were the most wonderful boy! Love you forever.
August 12, 2018
Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy. Matthew 5:7
You were merciful, one of your many wonderful qualities. You had a kind heart. Your sweetness is missed here. Love you forever! Miss you every day.
August 5, 2018
So sad about you these days. So sorry every day. Love you forever.
August 3, 2018
This morning I read the obituary of a young man with a sad story that seemed like yours. Sometimes I think about you being there to greet people as they cross from this life to the next and befriending them and comforting them. You were such a kind and understanding person. Miss you every day. Love you forever!
August 2, 2018
When you were little I never wanted the summer to end because I liked having you home, but I used to love buying you the special lunchbox, backpack, and sneakers you wanted for back to school. Now the back to school ads make me sad.....You gave me so many happy times! Miss you every day. Love you forever!
July 31, 2018
Yesterday I saw a little boy playing with a giant green light saber. He was showing his tiny sister how to use it, and she watched very intently. So cute! So much like you and PQM! Miss you so much! Love you forever!
July 28, 2018
We watched the movie Coco this week. We will always remember you......until we can be together again. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
July 3, 2018
So hard not to be able to see you, to hear your voice, to hug you...Sometimes I tell myself that you are with me...when I see something that you would like, something that would make you laugh, something that would make you sad about how someone is being treated badly. I am grateful for those moments, but they will never be the same as having you here as you were. What it would be like just to sit with you again! If we get to find our perfect happiness in heaven, then I would find you there and we would sit and wait together until all of us are reunited. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
June 13, 2018
Wish you were here today. Wish you were here every day. You bought so much beauty and happiness to my life! Love you forever! Miss you every day!
May 29, 2018
Today I found some photos of our trip to celebrate your third birthday. You were such a beautiful little boy. You deserved to be as happy every day as you were then. Hope that you are so happy now! Miss you so much! Love you forever!
May 10, 2018
Tuesday I was walking on the Horseshoe, feeling so much sadness and regret...and suddenly I looked down and saw your memory stone. They'd never sent me a letter telling me where it was so I'd never known where to look among the 100's of pavers, but there you were. (Your name even spelled right!) It made me feel like you were there with me...what I hope for every day! Love you forever! Miss you more than words can say!
April 20, 2018
Thanks for the Godwinks moments this week. They helped me make it through. I believe you still help me... even though you shouldn't have to. Miss you so much! Love you forever!
April 8, 2018
I remember how I used to wait anxiously to get your text that you got back home ok. I no longer wait, no longer worry. I try to think that you are always home now, waiting for me - except that you never have to worry about anything now. How I wish we could be together again! Love you forever! Miss you every day!
March 25, 2018
Every day I wish I had been a better mother to you...but I could never wish for a better son. Miss you every day. Love you forever!
February 25, 2018
This week I finished the book Sing, Unburied, Sing. It was a tragically beautiful book, and it made me cry and think of you. I hope you are free from the weight and torment of life now. I hope you can sing joyfully. I hope I will hear you singing as I draw closer to where you are. I miss you so much! Love you forever!
January 6, 2018
Yesterday I talked to a dear friend that I have not had contact with in years. I talked mostly about you. I hope you do not mind. Your story is your own, and you preferred to keep much to yourself in life so I do not want to breach your privacy, but you are always in the forefront of my thoughts and at the center of my heart. Being able to talk about you to a trusted friend was a gift. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
Beekro
January 2, 2018
Hey LuLu! Happy New Year! Actually, this one sucked. For too many reasons to count. I miss you. I have no one to talk crap with. Which is boring. I just got out of the hospital. I have blood clots in my lungs and legs. I'll be on meds the rest of my life. Which sucks.
God I wish I could be texting you all of this instead of leaving it here. I feel closer here though because it's my only option I feel like besides right before bed and while I sleep. I still think about you often and miss you terribly! Love you lulu!
December 31, 2017
Today is the feast of the Holy Family. Our family cannot be complete until we are with you again. The years go by, and I worry you and I are farther apart even as I hope that the passing days could be bringing us closer together....Miss you so much every day! Love you forever!
December 25, 2017
Remembering our happy Christmases together. No Christmas (or any other day) will be truly happy until we are together again! We miss you every day and love you forever! Hope you enjoy the merriest of Christmases now.
November 23, 2017
Missed you so much today. I will always be so grateful for you. You gave me the most beautiful part of my life. Love you forever, most wonderful boy!
Beekro
November 18, 2017
LuLu I miss you so much! I just found myself wanting to text you and tell you what's going on. I miss talking to you so much. I told you everything. I wish you were still here but I know you're happy and looking down on everyone. Chloe's having a baby! But you already knew that! I can't wait. I told her it was a boy! She thought it was a girl. So, I'm gonna go relax and try to talk to you so I can vent! I love you and I miss you!
chloe
November 16, 2017
LUCIAN! guess what! i found out i'm having a boy! i got to see him moving and he yawned and did a thumbs up! it was adorable. i'm just barely showing. lemme tell you, it feels like this is not my body; like someone plopped my head on some other lady's body.
oh, i wish you were here for this! i miss you, lulu! hope you're having a good time up there!
November 14, 2017
I want to believe I can still hear you sometime, maybe feel you gently guiding me to be kinder and more generous to people who could use my help. But it is so hard to wonder if I will ever see you again, ever hug you, ever spend my days with you again. Missing you hurts so much every day. Love you forever!
chloe
October 12, 2017
hey, old friend. i'm sorry i haven't been here to say hello in so long. i haven't forgotten about you! never. there's just been SO much going on lately. because guess what!! i'm pregnant. 12 weeks on saturday. (i'm sure you just went "HOLY *well you know the word* CLEROY!" i wish you were here, lulu. i'm totally lost 90% of the time and have no idea what i'm doing (as you can see, not everything has changed, haha!). you always gave perfect advice, ya know, once you stopped joking and got serious. :) i miss your silly jokes. you're supposed to be here, lulu. :( i wish you were. but really i know you're around even if i can't see ya. everyone misses you a lot, especially your mum. becca and i talk about you all the time. all of our inside jokes and just the funny, ridiculous stuff you came up with. seems like just yesterday we were chillin with jay. i miss our little posse. having our slumber parties. watching his big 3D tv. watching frasier, haha! or going shopping for furniture and other stuff for the nest.
i wish i had been there for you, lulu. i'm sorry i wasn't. i know you were going through a lot; if i had known, i would've been there more. we wouldve left to visit you and it would've been just like old times for a little while. i wish we hadn't started to drift apart when becca and i moved to VA.
i love you, lucian. and i hope that, wherever you are, you're happy and there's no pain. i hope you're doing all the things you wanted to do. and i hope that you smile and laugh every day, all day. everyone loves and misses you like crazy! i promise it won't take so long for me to come say hey again next time. rest easy & fly high, friend! <3
October 11, 2017
I always read the obituaries now. So many people had beautiful, full lives. You can feel their family's love for them. I do find myself drawn to the sad ones though, the ones that have hints of tragedy, struggle, and mystery. You deserved a long, full, happy life. Maybe you are on to such a new life now. Always so sad we are not together. Miss you so much every day! Love you forever!
October 1, 2017
Today one of the answers to the NYT mini puzzle was Elmo. Made me smile and think of little you. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
September 17, 2017
On this day the most wonderful boy in the world was born! Happy Birthday, sweet Lucian! I am so grateful for you and to you! Rest in love.
September 17, 2017
I think today about the excitement of Drefting the clothes for your early arrival. I miss you so much.
September 14, 2017
Wish I could hear from you....to know where you are, to know that you are happy, to know that you are not gone forever. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
September 10, 2017
Five years gone! How can that be true? It is so hard to know what to say to you, so hard to find words that can say how much I love you, how much I miss you, how sorry I am for how I know I failed you, precious and wonderful baby boy! As the years pass I try to hope they will bring us together again one day forever.
September 10, 2017
Five years! It is so real and yet so hard to believe. I'm thinking of you all the time.
August 9, 2017
Sometimes I sit down and listen to all the sad songs on my Ipod that make me think about you. I cry and cry for you, for us left here. It's a kind of pain that feels good because it is so true, no pretending like when I am out in the world. You were such a beautiful person! Still miss you so much every day! Love you forever! Always trying yo believe we can be together again some day!
August 3, 2017
I wish you could come back...Perhaps you will come back at the very end. So hard not to see you! I miss you so much! Love you forever!
July 16, 2017
Has been a week that brought many welcome reminders of you, each one I hope was a point of contact, an opportunity to be together again....Yesterday I was watching an episode of Psych and there was a scene where they were questioning someone named Lucian and they used his name six times in quick succession as if to give me the great pleasure of hearing your name over and over again. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
June 25, 2017
So sad u have gone away. Miss u so much every day! Love u forever!
June 20, 2017
Yesterday when PQM and I were in Target there was a young man working there whose name was Lucian. Whenever someone with your unusual name crosses my path I hope it means you are sending me a little greeting. Need to hope you are out there somewhere and able to relax and be happy. Love you so much! Miss you every day!
Beekro
June 19, 2017
LuLu! Hey there I'm about to get off work. It's 6:15 and I have 15 more minutes. I was thinking about how as soon as I go home I'm going to sleep and that reminded me that I had a dream about you. We were going on a walk talking about all of our inside jokes and laughing nonstop. It was nice. I usually don't ever dream so I've come to the conclusion that it wasn't a dream and that you just stopped by to say hey. I miss seeing you every morning and texting all day about stupid stuff. I'd give anything to get a text back from you about that stupid stuff now. I miss you so much. You will always be my bifflez. I love you! I'm going to go home, go to sleep, and try to get you to stop by again. Please continue to watch over everyone.
June 17, 2017
Watched a Nature documentary about giant armadillos because I know you would have been interested in seeing them. Miss you so much! Love you forever!
June 17, 2017
PQM is home. I wish you were here with us. Being together was always the best! Love you forever! Miss you every day.
June 9, 2017
Today I was looking at a photo of our little family. It was taken when you were about five and PQM was about one. You were so beautiful in your little blazer, all dressed up. Always such a sweet expression. Like in some fantasy story I wanted to step into the picture, back into that time with you. So sad you are gone! Miss you every day! Love you forever!
June 5, 2017
So scared today. Please watch over Earl. He has helped so much to keep me going! You always appreciated the love of a good dog. If you can, please help him to be OK. You would always try to comfort and calm in a situation like this. So hard without you! Love you forever! Miss you every day!
June 2, 2017
Today there was a story in the newspaper about a man who builds these elaborate sandcastles at the beach. You liked the beach. I wish we had taken more trips to the beach...I wish we could be together again. You were such a sweet an wonderful boy! You deserved to be happy. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
May 14, 2017
Thanks to you I became a mommy. My dearest dream come true! You gave me the happiest season of my life. That is the beautiful way a recent NYT obituary described how one woman thought of her time with her children. Miss you every day! Love you forever!
April 28, 2017
Streetlamp flashed on and off repeatedly as I thought about you on this morning's walk. Always hoping for a sign you are still with us as we make our way. Love you forever! Miss you every day!
Doug
April 21, 2017
Reading your father's book, and saw where he mentioned you. I am praying for your family just now. It's quite obvious they loved you so much, and were immensely blessed to have you as their son.
April 21, 2017
Earl's been chasing some of the many green lizards showing up in the backyard. Seeing one of the lizards always reminds me of you and how much you liked them and animals of all kinds. You were such a sweet and gentle person. I am so grateful for every reminder of you! Miss you every day! Love you forever!
Beekro
March 13, 2017
Lulu! I was thinking about you today bifflez. I kinda miss you a little bit dude. Okay. I miss you a lot! Chloe and I have an issue with playing poker online. The struggle is real. You know, I like to go all in or at least not fold when I should. I'm always saying things like 'What the heck! Lucian folded every single hand and still won. I can't live like this!' I feel like playing it brings back a lot of memories and it's fun to just sit and think of all the fun we had. I miss talking to you and telling you about my not so big problems. Our birthday was the 9th and I missed the 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY OLD LADY' texts. Can you believe we're 27? All this time passes and I wish I could see you. You're probably looking all magical and wrinkle free. Don't even start! I know exactly what you're thinking. 'Beekro. It's time...to invest in a wrinkle cream.' I miss you. Please find a way to help us all find you. I know you're watching over everyone, so prove me right and show us. Love you bifflez!
oh yeah. it's supposed to snow. i read about why it's quiet when it snows. I'm going to try to find you tonight! I have lots to tell you.
we think about you often lulu. the tripod loves you & misses you.
March 11, 2017
I bought cherry juice today. You loved cherries. I like to buy things you liked - a kind of offering to you. Wish you were here. Love you forever. Miss you every day.
March 8, 2017
Today I finished reading Lincoln in the Bardo. I read it as part of my search for communion with you. The search for you, beloved baby boy, will continue until, I hope, we are reunited forever. Love you and miss you every day!
February 5, 2017
Wish we could go back to our Super Bowl parties. You made everything happier. So sad without you now. Love you forever! Miss you every day.
February 4, 2017
You will always be my treasure! Love you forever. Miss you every day!
beekro
January 26, 2017
you would've been amazed at who me and the sister got to meet and take a photo with. I can hear the excitement in your voice when I think of what you would've said. the tripod misses you and thinks of you all the time. please watch over everyone who misses you and loves you; they need you
January 23, 2017
So many sad thoughts about you today. Hope you are free of sadness now. Miss you so much. Love you forever!
January 21, 2017
Character on Netflix show I watched today reminded me so much of you. Wish you were here! Love you forever! Miss you every day
January 20, 2017
I am so sorry every day! ....But it will never be enough. I wish I had known what to do for you, most precious boy. Love you forever! Miss you all day long every single day!
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