Mary Ann Barnett

Our dear mother, Mary Ann Dudley Barnett passed away on July 6, 2025. Her last wish was to be able to stay at her home until the end, which she was able to do. Thankfully it appears that she passed peacefully in her sleep, falling just short of her goal of making the Century mark. She is survived by her eldest son Bryan, Blake and daughter-in-law Kay Barnett and Annie "the Schnauzer" Barnett.
After much consideration and soul searching, we have decided not to have an in-person tribute service for our mom as there are so many people that would not be able to attend from different parts of the country. In keeping with her love of the written word we felt it would be more of a tribute to her to have the many students, colleagues, friends and neighbors that she cherished to talk about their experiences and what she meant to you in your lives. Feel free to post as much or as little as you feel inclined which could be photos, videos, words of reflection or whatever brings meaning to you that will help you through the sadness you may feel. I would like to think she will be sitting in her favorite chair, basking in the reading of whatever you choose to post. Based on what personal effects she left behind, I am convinced that she had every single communication she ever received, so we see this as an ongoing labor of love that can be the gift that keeps on giving for all of us who knew her.
Mary Ann, or MA as many called her was born an only child of Ann Dudley (Plummer) and Lloyd B Dudley and was officially welcomed into the world by her loving parents on May 5, 1926 in Enid, Oklahoma. Shortly thereafter, the family moved to Big Spring, Texas, commonly called the Main Spring of Texas, where "Dud" managed one of the first Piggly Wiggly stores (SEE PHOTOS). Mary Ann was the center of her adoring parent's world, each determined to give her all that they were not able to have, growing up in large rural families and later on, in the midst of the Great Depression. We are not certain how Mary Ann became interested in dance (SEE PHOTOS) but what we do know is that she loved dance, beginning at a very young age including ballet and tap. By all appearances she was a natural and throughout her life she would break into some kind of dance move, spur of the moment at the least expected moment. Her mom, Ann (Mimi) became quite accomplished in sewing adorable costumes for recitals that Mary Ann participated in and fair to say, my mom remembered it as a picture perfect time in her life. That is until our Grandfather Dud, broke the news to our mom just before her senior year in high school, that he was going in the ranching and farming business and they were moving lock, stock and barrel to Amarillo, effective immediately. His beloved ranch became known as the Frying Pan Ranch located in Bushland, Texas and later he had farming interests in the Borger, Texas area.
This may have been our mom's first glimpse that life wasn't always the way you wished it would be, but with her outgoing personality, she became used to the idea very quickly. Her Senior year turned out to be quite a pivotal year as the boys just a year ahead of her were off to defend our country, in what was the beginning of World War II. My mom's first serious boyfriend was named Blake, and of course you probably already guessed what became of him. My Brother, Bryan and I took my mom back to Big Spring to join those that she wasn't able to graduate with, for a long overdue 50 year reunion celebration. She was able to visit Blake's grave which was bittersweet for her as you can imagine.
Somewhere along the way our mom fell in love with horses (SEE PHOTOS) which fit very well with her attending Christian College in Columbia, Missouri following graduation from Amarillo High School at the tender age of 16. Riding became a regular part of her "curriculum" and she was able to learn the art of riding with an English saddle. Western style had already become second nature for her on the Frying Pan Ranch. She retained that passion throughout her life and always kept her western style saddle on a stand in her guest bedroom as a reminder.
Mary Ann's next stop was at the University of Texas in Austin where she joined the Chi Omega Sorority. It's debatable whether she was most proud of being a sorority sister or of being able to say she was a Texas Longhorn fan. What became evident throughout her life to those who knew her well was that she was so proud of her Texas heritage and often claimed in jest that she was just visiting New Mexico. Her Oklahoma friends that knew her well liked to remind her that she got her start in Enid as in the great state of Oklahoma.
While still attending UT, my mom met Walter who was her math instructor. He had taken an interest in her while in his class but supposedly didn't act on it until after she had completed his course. The truth may be somewhere in between. LOL She did make it clear through the years to us, that math was not her strongest subject and legend has it that Walter kidded that he had to marry our mom just to get her out of his class.
Within a few years of graduation from UT, Walter and our mom married in a wedding ceremony that apparently was quite an event, which was exactly what Mr. Dudley and mom, Ann wanted it to be. According to Mary Ann, her father had to remind her when the wedding party expanded beyond what he thought was reasonable, that many of these people, she probably would lose touch with, most of them by the time she reached 30 years old. As it turned out there was some truth to that though she was pretty good about staying in touch with them through the years. As a matter of information, turns out she outlived every single one of them.
Bryan was the first child to arrive, then several years later Blake showed up. Suffice it to say that life had it's challenges and their marriage ended in divorce. As she moved on through her life, she met second husband, Bill who was in the oil related business and before you knew it, they set out for Farmington, New Mexico where there was a serious oil boom going on in the early to mid-fifties. The road from Albuquerque to Farmington was a dirt road, possibly just from Cuba? A fact my grandfather could not believe on his first drive to New Mexico, commenting that he was wondering, "Where in the Hell did my daughter move to?" Shortly thereafter, along came Suzie. Sad to say, a few years later, her second marriage ended. So here she was in a bit of a foreign country as a single parent of three bratty little treasures in the 1950s. What was she to do as it wasn't a well-received idea to be a single working mom at that time in our country. In thinking about how to support her family she reflected on her desire to be a social worker, but her dad suggested she might be better served to try teaching instead. This is where the next chapter of her life began.
Farmington was a bustling community of young parents with a lifetime of big dreams to follow and this meant there were also large numbers of baby boomer children ready and willing to attend schools. Our mom somehow made her way into the office of McCormick Elementary School to talk to Principal, Fred Shoffner. He proved to be her guiding light in an extraordinary career. Mr. Shoffner was a true southern gentleman and in his kind and gentle way he told her there was a bit of a problem. Though she had the required degree, she had no teaching experience nor had she completed her student teaching. He thought a minute and said, "but..... I still will hire you as we have a huge shortage of teachers. I will look in on you several times a day for your first semester and we'll count that as your student teaching, and BTW, you will be teaching 4th grade and you have 50 students in your classroom." Many years later when Mary Ann had retired, we threw a belated party to celebrate the occasion, at the Elks Lodge. We were able to locate Fred, also retired and living in South Carolina. He wrote a tribute letter to her, outlining what she had meant to the teaching profession and community at large. We have included that letter in our remembrances to her. Mother taught at McCormick for ten years and some of her teaching buddies were Nita Barton, Lucille Foster, Effie Scanlon and Marilyn Mallen and they had quite the time together. Years later my mom was particularly sad one day, realizing she was the last one left of the bunch.
One of my favorite stories she told about one of her students was that a young boy kept coming in late each day and in a moment of frustration, she blurted out to him, "Why are you late?" and with the fear that crept over him, knowing he was in trouble, he said, "Cause I just got here". Without hesitation, Mary Ann said, "Why didn't you leave earlier?" His trembling lips hesitantly said, "Cause it was too late". She knew there was more to the story so she pulled him aside, calmed him and found that he lived on a farm and had daily chores to do each day. Never was another word spoken about his continued tardiness.
One of my mom's many classes was a particularly memorable 4th grade group as they happened to be the same age as me (Blake). The year was 1960 if my poor memory serves me correctly. There were quite a bunch of unique personalities that shared one thing in common, they liked their teacher, they liked the 4th grade and they all got along quite well. I think my mom realized as a group, they were as good as it gets, though she probably would downplay it if you asked her about it today. My guess is that those students would say that it was more about her being able to motivate them and make everyone feel included.
At the end of the school year, it appeared there were some big changes about to take place as the new Bluffview Elementary School down the road was opening their doors. We are not certain why Mary Ann approached principal, Ed Winters about moving over to Bluffview School the next year. Reading between the lines, funny how she ended up having almost all of the same students, this time in 5th grade, all because of the reconfigured neighborhoods effort. The only ones left behind were Doug Brown and Terry Duncan and Doug told me recently she was still apologizing for leaving them behind. I'm certain she tried every legal way to make it happen, but they just lived too close to McCormick School to justify moving them. Not surprisingly, it may have been the easiest year of her teaching career.
Not sure when it happened but her next stop was teaching at Apache Elementary School with Principal Ed Sweat. She always wanted to give credit to her principals as she valued their support tremendously. We know that she valued those 10 years as much as the previous ten at McCormick and Bluff- view Schools. From there she moved to Tibbetts Jr. High into the Science department, something she always wanted to teach. Barry Sigmon was one of her favorite administrators there, not sure but I think he was Vice-Principal and Mr. Southhall was principal. Could be wrong but there is a great story here with Mr. Southhall which rather highlights who Mary Ann was as a teacher. She was called to the office one day by Mr. Southhall and he demanded for my mom to explain why this student, Tommy Bolack (RIP) had all "Fs" except for an "A" in Science. She explained that when they got to the chapter on Electricity, she was feeling rather uncomfortable about her knowledge of that particular area. Tommy, normally very quiet, was speaking up and filling in the blanks for her and before it was over, she basically gave the floor to him and let him teach the whole chapter on electricity. In her view as she spoke to Principal Southall, that deserved an "A" grade regardless of what he did or didn't do in other classes. She stood her ground and the grade remained unchanged.
It seemed my mom had to often counter the "I hate Science" comments in the beginning of each year. She famously explained that "Science is Everywhere" and would have students name anything in the room and she would demonstrate the relevance of Science in creating that product. Pretty compelling argument she would say. The word got around pretty fast that Science was fun in her class. Not surprisingly, Mary Ann encouraged the students to participate locally in Science Fair, and one year she took 7 students on to the state level with each winning 1st in their category. She didn't limit her attention to Science as she involved herself in cheerleading and on and on.
Time to talk about what was going on simultaneously where we lived in San Juan Park. Our house seemed to be kind of a hang-out for the neighborhood kids and one would think that Mary Ann would have had enough of them by the time she got home at night, but she always welcomed anyone that wanted to join the group, and there were many. It wasn't uncommon for Bryan, Suzie or myself to arrive home and find our friends sitting around chatting with Mary Ann or working on a jigsaw puzzle in the corner of the living room. She would hide the picture of the puzzle to make it more challenging for all of us. Somehow, having no idea what we were putting together, suddenly the completed picture appeared and much to the amazement and cheering of each participant. My mother was always the teacher and looking back, I think she was very proud that most all of the Kids in the neighborhood had participated in the blind creation of the puzzle. Then there was the pool table in Bryan's and my bedroom that saw a great deal of activity and a tether ball in the side yard. We also challenged our balancing skills by walking the top railing of the fence around our front yard. The neighborhood kids were quite impressed with themselves that eventually they were able to make it completely around the yard without touching the ground. I repaired and painted that dang fence more than a time or three through the years and always laughed about how the real damage and wear and tear had occurred. Tired and dilapidated, the fence still stands today as a testament to our mom's longevity. On another occasion, an antique slot machine found it's way to our house and hearing all the commotion in the "rec room", Mary Ann knew something was up, especially with the odd "Ka-ching" sound of the slot machine lever. Rumor has it that a curly haired skinny guy, driving an old postman's 3-wheel scooter may have had something to do with it but we can't confirm that. The slot machine disappeared as fast as it had mysteriously arrived on the scene. From that day forward, 801 Zuni Dr has been referred to as Barnett's Casino and the name still stands today.
What parents would tolerate all this nonsense? Passersby must have kidded that it looked as though the neighborhood kids were corralled to protect the general public from all the goofballs. It seemed parents were also probably scratching their heads about all the goings-on in the Barnett family but they always knew where their kids were and that they were having fun and in good hands, Mary Ann being right in the middle of everything. It was not uncommon for a parent to call my mom and request that she send their child home.... Right now!
Yes, 801 Zuni Drive was an interesting place to grow up as my mom always tried to make up for us having only one parent. She supported us in every way that a child of privilege could muster. Whether it was swimming, tennis, baseball or academic work such as notebooks, Science projects or just plain old boring homework.
Being a single parent in those days came with additional financial pressures, given the less than stellar paygrade, but it was especially hard for Mary Ann as her father had always told her, whatever the issue, "Just call your dear old dad" and with his passing and all of us in our junior high and high school years, she was not prepared for going it alone. She found herself in a difficult financial position and in danger of losing her beloved house. We weren't aware at the time that foreclosure was looming, but in her never give up and always positive way, she took on an extra job in the evenings selling appliances at Western Tire in Palmer Plaza. Again, she made it look easy and like it was fun. In thinking back, it couldn't have been that great leaving school and checking in at home with us for an hour or so and then going to work until 9:00 at night and including many weekends. Students and former students would drop in to see her as if it were perfectly normal for a teacher to be working a second job. Always the jokester, Mary Ann called Western Tire one day to let them know she would be there shortly and her friend Dennie Paskell answered the Phone in his usual polite but dry drawl. "Western Taur" he said, and my mom responded, "Is there a faur at Western Taur?" Taking it very seriously, he said, Well no, I don't believe so" as he nervously surveyed the situation and then of course he realized he had been punked by our mom, and then practically laughed himself silly.
We remember those years well leading up to my graduation in 1970 and looking back I wonder how my mom did what she did as she even threw a party in the "corral" at Barnett's Casino for all the graduates and I mean all of the graduates, some 400 plus students. All were welcome. There was a live Rock and Roll band with Fender Tucker and his group playing on the front porch. It was the culmination of an interesting and fun upbringing. Little did we all know that life was about to get pretty serious and pretty quick as many of us faced the reality of the Vietnam war, hanging over us like a dark cloud. Most of us survived and were back at "801" again for a ten and maybe there was even a 20 year corral reunion. Friends and friends of friends, and former students always honored her by dropping by to visit with her each class reunion thereafter. In fact, we found new messages on her voicemail after she had already passed, just checking in to visit with her.
There was an unusual circumstance that occurred in 1972 that profoundly affected Mary Ann. It became a sort of calling for her. Turns out that she had become close friends with the Tanner family when they originally lived in Farmington as her first job was with an oil company, working alongside Darrell. His wife Carol Ann, and the kids Vince, Bradley, Jason, Tracy and Linley became very important to our family and in fact, a lifelong enduring friendship was created. Bradley had come to Kirtland in the summertime to visit his many cousins and because he particularly enjoyed coming back to the area. He was having fun in his dune buggy but unfortunately was involved in a horrific accident, the emergency room doctors thinking he wouldn't survive. Much to everyone's delight, Bradley did make it with his determined will to live. Shortly thereafter, our mom received a phone call from Darrell, asking if she would take a leave of absence and come to Las Vegas and live with them to get Bradley through his senior year of high school as his injuries were too serious to allow him to attend classes. As I recall, she didn't hardly think twice about it so she packed her bags, rented her house out and off she went to the gambling capital of the world. This would be the first time she only had one student but the responsibilities were rather large but nothing she couldn't handle. As Bradley recovered, he would test the waters on what the limits were because after all, this was his only teacher. My mom was able to draw on all of her skills as a parent and a teacher to help Bradley succeed in what might have been the most challenging year he has had in his life. They became very close, more like a family member than a pupil. Time for her to return home and she picked up right where she left off, teaching 16 more years in the Farmington District. Their special friendship continued through over 50 years.
I would be remis if I didn't talk more about the single most important person in our mom's life and that would be her father, Lloyd (Dud) Bryan Dudley. She was a Daddy's girl almost from day one. (SEE PHOTOS) He always told her she was the greatest thing he had ever done in his life and even whispered that to her in his final moments of his life. I am reminded of a story that Mother told many times through her life which demonstrated who Dud was and who my mom was to become in regards to race. My grandfather had done well in business in his later years, and considering he and my grandmother, Mimi had divorced some years back and living by himself, he had a cleaning lady that happened to be a Black American working for him several days a week. Amarillo, being in the deep south was not that sympathetic to the plight of Black American citizens in the 1950's. I so wish I could remember her name but her face, her kindness and compassion towards us as little kids when we visited Dud, still remains clear in my mind as if it were yesterday. We also noticed that Dud treated her with the same respect afforded to all that he came in contact with. Oh my, her name just came to me. Her name was Johnnie Mae. My mom just loved to tell this story and even as I recollect, It reminds me why she so loved it. To continue, my grandfather demanded that she always come in the front door upon her arrival which I'm sure the neighbors took notice thereof. Each day, Johnnie Mae was driven to work by family members as several of them had to share one car in those days. Imagine that! LOL There were occasions that Johnnie Mae would not have a ride so my grandfather would pick her up at home and then make the return trip with her at the end of the day. On one particular day, Mr. Dudley was stopped by a police officer for an unknown infraction. As the officer approached the car he bent over to glance in the window and immediately ordered my grandfather to exit the car. Somewhere in the conversation, the young officer asked him if he was one of those "N" Lovers. In a flash of uncontained anger, he slapped the officer across his face. His punishment was that his Texas driver's license was permanently revoked. From that day forth, Dud became a New Mexico licensed driver. Through the years I couldn't help but wonder how that incident effected that officer, if at all. I would like to think it ultimately made him a better human being.
There was a related story that occurred after Mr. Dudley's passing. My mom was one of the chaperones at a Tibbetts Junior High dance. Apparently, it was common knowledge about MA's love of dancing so some of the students were asking her to dance and she did not disappoint. She could cut the rug as they used to say. One of them happened to be a Black student and keep in mind this was at the very beginning of the Civil Rights movement. An administrative staff member, which will remain unnamed, pulled her aside to express that this was inappropriate behavior for a teacher. Once again, my mom had no trouble in setting that person straight for their inappropriate behavior. If you think teachers don't have a lasting effect on students, think again as this story was related to me recently by someone who was present at that dance.
We are not certain how many of MA's students decided to become teachers because of her appearance that educators had so much fun. It is true that she had the time of her life with her crazy sense of humor, her special occasion wild costumes (SEE PHOTOS), and her desire to share material that was fascinating to her, presented in an interesting and comprehensible manner. On more than one occasion, they would say to her that they wanted to become a teacher because she made it seem so much fun and easy. Most agreed yes it was fun but no, far from easy.
In summing up how my mom felt about her teaching philosophy, she would tell you that every single one of her students mattered, they each had their story and that she was determined to extract the value of their own personal experiences, helping them to understand how important those moments unique to them were, whether they considered them good, bad or ugly. That would be the lasting and consequential legacy to their lives. We have estimated that our mom taught over 3000 students in her 32 years as an educator. A life in any measure, well lived.
There were many who contributed to almost daily caring for our mom through recent years and of course at the top of the list was my brother, Bryan and Annie the famous Snoozer-Sneezer-Schnauzer. We would like to especially thank Theresa and Eugene Archibeque, Molly King, Jackie & Andy Benally, Janielle Benally, Aleena Benally, Karen Christiansen, Valerie and Mark Uselman, Robert Tansey, Debbie Dewees, Janet and Ken Hall, Kathryn Arnold, Cathy Martinez, Guy Lynn Durham, Cheryl Durham, Bill and Marva Wertz, J.D. Estrada, Dr. Dekay, Vianne Willits, and Cardiologist, Dr. Wilkins. I'm certain this is not a complete list and please forgive us if we failed in this regard. You all know who you are and sincerely, a huge Thank You.
As a footnote and in keeping with our mom's goofy sense of humor, i wanted to leave you with this mini-true story. I used to call home often when I was in the U.S. Air Force and keep in mind this was before the days of caller ID and somehow, I think my mom would sense it was me on the phone, so she would answer, "Joe's Mule Barn". It always struck me so funny and was a great beginning to our conversations. This happened on an ongoing basis through the years and no matter how often she used the same line, it would make me just crack up. Don't know where it came from but like most comedic material, it just comes from nowhere and spur of the moment, but on one occasion I said, "Is this Joe or the Jack Ass?" She loved it.
In closing and if you feel like you would like to do something special in her memory, her favorite charity was St. Jude Children's Research Hospital. This won't be surprising to any of you who knew her. stjude.org/donatetoday To plant a beautiful memorial tree in memory of Mary, please visit our Tree Store.