Donald Kay

Donald E. Kay, 89, beloved widower of Joyce Ann (Parker) Kay, and son, brother, father, grandfather, great grandfather, uncle and friend to many, went to be with the Lord and his Bride on July 25, 2023, surrounded by his family at Hunter Holmes McGuire VA Hospital.
Donald was born October 6, 1933, in Niagara Falls, N.Y. The son of Irene (Brennen) Kay and Wendell H. Kay, he was the youngest of seven brothers and two sisters. Don was predeceased by his brothers Thomas, William, Durward, Robert, and Wendell, and sisters Rosemary and Irene.
His amazing brother Richard F. of Englewood, Fla., continues as the Family Patriarch along with Matriarch sister-in-law Mildred (Case) Kay (wife of Robert L.) as exemplary members of The Greatest Generation.
Other family members include sisters-in law Jean (Kellick) Kay, Anne (Golden) Kay, Mary Ann (Monroe) Kay, Billy (Toomey) Kay and brothers-in-law Robert "Bud" Stefik and Francis Quinn. Sister-in-law Beverly (Martinez) Parker; brothers-in-law Richard Parker and Donald Parker.
Donald is survived by son Thomas E. Kay (Burlingame, Calif.); Carol (Barry) Kay, their sons and grandsons Robert P. Kay and Trevor B. Kay (wife) Samantha (O'Flynn) Kay; and great-grandsons Beckett and Bodie; a son, Michael A. Kay, of Brookfield; and grandsons Alexander, Nathaniel, and Christopher, a daughter, Eileen M. (Kay) Rymph, her husband, Andrew, granddaughter Caylin and grandson Andrew J., of Greenwich, N.Y.; a daughter, Donna E. (Kay) Ness, her husband, Erik, and granddaughter Kiersten, of Somers; a daughter, Susan L. (Kay) Vander Have, and her husband, Todd, of Sandy Hook; and grandsons Bryan and Timothy (wife) Anne Davis Nielsen (Parks); a son, Matthew W. Kay and his wife, Otilia, of Dewey Humbolt, Ariz.; a son, Donald B. Kay of New Milford; a son, Gregory R. Kay and his wife Bernadeth, of Richmond, Va; sister-in-law Gina (Francescon) Parker of Tampa, Fla; and brother-in-law Robert and wife Pat of Pittsford, N.Y.
He is also survived by many nieces and nephews on Kay side of the tree, including Geralynn, Bobby, JoAnn, Robert L. Kay family; Kathleen, Mimi, Bill, Bobby, David, and Robert Stefik (Rosemary) family; Rich, Billy, Annie, Patrick, and Wendell Kay family; Wendell, Byron, Kelly, Pat, Mary Claire, and Richard F. Kay family; Jimmy, John, and Durward (Woody) Kay family; Frank, Claudia, and Francis Quinn (Irene) family; Parker nieces and nephews including Richard and Lisa, Richard Parker (Gina) family; Patrick, Mike, Mark, and Donald Parker family; Peter & David, Robert Parker family.
Don enjoyed a wonderful childhood growing up around many loving brothers and sisters, while learning the game of golf from his father, steeled by a faith in God, and an absolute love of his mother. Don helped to round out the 5-man "Roselle Ringers" Squad that routinely routed their hardwood opponents and gained significant "acknowledgement" from the Gazette for their Hoop victories.
He graduated from Bishop Duffy High School in 1951, then enrolled at Niagara University and joined brothers Richard and Woody on the NU Golf Team. In 1954, following his brothers, Don entered the United States Army, serving until 1956 during the Korean War assigned to a Nike Missile Unit.
Upon returning to Niagara Falls, Donald was introduced to Joyce Ann Parker by Joyce's brother Richard. After some "interesting" first encounters, including "I'm going to marry you someday," Joyce relented and began dating Don. Ultimately the two were married on June 7, 1958, in Niagara Falls, N.Y.
Irish Twins Thomas and Michael soon followed, bringing up their next life adventure: moving to Connecticut in 1961, with Don serving as Assistant Professional to brother Bob at Wampanoag CC and brother Durward (Woody) at Rockledge CC.
Once properly trained by his brothers in the country club arts, Don was off to Norwich CC and his first Head Pro position. Meanwhile the family was growing with the additions of Eileen, Donna, Susan and soon Matthew and Donald.
The Norwich position led to Donald accepting the PGA Head Professional job at the newly opened Heritage Village CC in Southbury in 1967. In 1970 Gregory was born, the final member of the "10 on the Bridge Club" and what a welcome addition he was. There the Kay Family remained until 1991.
During this time Don enjoyed growing the HVCC membership, headlined by such stalwart members as Holmes, Moffit, Mullany, Metz, Nelson, Davis, and so many others who were most wonderful to Don and Joyce and their sizeable family. In addition to cultivating his PGA Professional relationships with many Connecticut Section Pros, Don enjoyed many rounds with members and professional colleagues during their Annual CT Section Schedule and yearly trips to play winter tournaments in Florida.
In addition, Don provided professional golf instruction at all levels, from juniors to seniors, sons, daughters, and nieces and nephews, and assisted as a design consultant on the Heritage Village Pomperaug Course under construction. In 1971 Don had a big hand in drawing and assisting Henry Pappazazzo in bringing LPGA Golf and the Ladies of the Professional Golf Association to Heritage Village. He also engaged the 82nd Governor of Connecticut, Thomas Meskill, in this pursuit and they remained lifelong friends.
Golf brought many incredible people, amateurs, professionals and characters into his life and he surely had fond memories of them all sharing many wonderful times. The family is pretty sure Don is commiserating with them now.
Joyce and Don then followed Greg to Richmond College in 1991. With Don wearing multiple hats, first as PGA Professional at Meadows Farms CC Fredricksburg, Va., and secondly and more importantly as Joyce's General Contractor on the construction of their dream home in Spotsylvania, Va., they lived and watched the family grow over the coming years, again building many wonderful relationships in Virginia.
After many wonderful years in Va., in 2000 Don and Joyce moved back to Connecticut, this time to Guilford, to be closer to their family. They enjoyed many family times and births of many grandchildren along with making many new friends over the next ten+ years, serving a number of ministries, through St George Catholic Church, Meals on Wheels, Hospice, Connecticut Right to Life, and Knights of Columbus.
Upon the passing of his bride in 2011, Don's world changed significantly as he began life without Joyce, and set his "goal" to be reunited with her. Don spent his final years split between Englewood, Fla., and Richmond, Va. (home of youngest son Gregory). He received compassionate and the most professional health care, from the Port Charlotte and Richmond VA Hospitals throughout the duration of his life. To those doctors, nurses, and healthcare workers the family is forever indebted.
Family and friends are welcomed to Honan Funeral Home, 58 Main Street in Newtown, on Friday, August 4, between 5 and 8 pm. A Mass of Christian Burial will be celebrated on Saturday, August 5, at 9:30 am, at St Rose of Lima Church, 46 Church Hill Road in Newtown. Interment will follow at St Rose Cemetery.
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