Mailan Dao

Born on October 30, 1962, under the sign of Scorpio and the Chinese zodiac sign of the Water Tiger, Mailan Hoa ng was a brave, confident, independent, and energetic woman who loved challenges. The Water Tiger also bestowed upon her flexibility, empathy, and emotional intelligence - qualities that complemented her deeply compassionate soul.

Like many others, Mailan's family came to the United States as refugees from the war in Vietnam in 1975, after the South fell to the Communists of North Vietnam. Her family consisted of her father, mother, older brother Linh, and younger brother Lam.

They settled in Berkeley, California, where Mailan attended Berkeley High School and later continued her studies at UC Berkeley for a year. She did not complete her degree, choosing instead to work and help support her family.

At the age of 33, she married Hu ng a o, a young man from a family long acquainted with her own. From this marriage, Mailan took her husband's surname, a o, and together they had one son, Alexander a o - the pride and joy of her life, to whom she devoted her deepest and most enduring motherly love.

Mailan's life was marked by great trials and sorrows. She suffered several serious illnesses in Vietnam; her father passed away from hepatitis not long after the family settled in Berkeley; and her husband Hu ng was diagnosed with lung cancer. Within a few short years, his three brothers also succumbed to illness, each in the prime of life. Eventually, Hu ng too passed away, leaving Mailan to raise Alex on her own - bereft of companionship and support.

Through it all, Mailan's fighting spirit never wavered. She allowed herself moments of grief, but always rose again - working tirelessly and doing her very best for her son, around whom her world revolved.

After a brief period living in Southern California, she returned to the Bay Area and settled in Alameda, a quaint and peaceful community where she could provide Alex with good schools and a nurturing environment. It was during this time that she met David Le, who would later become her second husband.

David had known of Mailan since their childhood in Vietnam: his sister, Khanh, had been Mailan's best friend when they attended a Catholic school together. The girls often spent their afternoons at Khanh's house until Mailan's brother came to pick her up. After the war, both families eventually resettled in the Bay Area. Khanh later followed her parents to France, where she married and started a family, but the friendship between the two women endured - and, unknowingly, became the thread that would one day bind their families even closer.

Just as Mailan and David's relationship began to deepen, David received an irresistible job offer in Washington, D.C. and decided to move there temporarily, planning to return to the Bay Area after a couple of years. Unfortunately, within a year of his departure, Mailan's kidneys failed, and she had to begin dialysis - her condition was critical. David immediately left D.C. and returned to care for her. By what can only be described as a miracle, Mailan received a living kidney donation from Jeff Oberhauser-Lim, a manager and friend she had made during her time at Bank of America. His extraordinary generosity gave her twenty more precious years of life.

The transplant was a success, and Mailan's health was restored. To prevent rejection of the new kidney, she had to take immunosuppressive medication, which weakened her immune system to protect the transplanted organ. Yet tragedy struck again. Three years later, she was diagnosed with urothelial cancer, originating in the lining of a ureter attached to her left, native kidney. What followed were months of agony - pain, nausea, loss of appetite, surgery, chemotherapy, and radiation. At last, the cancer went into remission, though she knew it could one day return.

From that moment on, Mailan lived with the quiet awareness of time's fragility. She cherished every day, every friendship, and every shared laugh. She was loving, gracious, generous, and endlessly caring toward family and friends alike.

During those twenty hard-won years, she lived fully - encouraging her son, Alex, and her husband, David, to always strive for excellence: in school, at work, behind the wheel, and in life itself. Her love guided and strengthened them both.

For this love, this devotion, and this boundless compassion, we are forever grateful.

We miss her deeply. Each day we face an unimaginable void - one that her presence, her voice, her touch, and her soul once filled.

We love her, and we will carry her in our hearts always.